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Mighty Hiker
climber
Vancouver, B.C.
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Some of you are playing with fire. Google is a wonderful tool for finding jokes about any group you care to name. In other words, mutually assured destruction may be the result of some of the above 'jokes'.
At least I played by the rules, and provided a short joke.
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Thorgon
Big Wall climber
Sedro Woolley, WA
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If you are at home and you are mowing, does that make you a homo?
Thor
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Studly
Trad climber
WA
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Got a match?
yeah, your breath and a buffalo fart.
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nature
climber
Tucson, AZ
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Topic Author's Reply - Jul 1, 2010 - 07:25pm PT
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I think I need to head over to Google and find some jokes about Canadians - especially the western type.
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HighTraverse
Trad climber
Bay Area
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Why do you want jokes about Canadians? They won't understand them.
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Mighty Hiker
climber
Vancouver, B.C.
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The "Canada Day" thread provides quite a lot of Canadian jokes, and later maybe I'll add more.
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Ricky D
Trad climber
Sierra Westside
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Where do you find a one legged dog?
Where you last left it.
What do you call a one-eyed, one legged, one armed person?
F*#ked.
A guy walks into a Idaho gun store and asks to buy the biggest handgun in the store. The clerk says what do you plan to shoot? "Cans", says the customer. "Cans?" says the clerk. Yeah, you know - MexiCANs, AfriCANS, Puerto RiCANS.
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Ricky D
Trad climber
Sierra Westside
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What do you call a naked person doing asanas?
Yogi Bare of course.
What do you call a naked girl doing the down dog pose?
A good date.
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MisterE
Social climber
Bouncy Tiggerville
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Specifically, some Canadian Lawyer jokes might bunch some pants :)
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mark miller
Social climber
Reno
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"An Irishman walks out of a bar............" No it really could happen.
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Mighty Hiker
climber
Vancouver, B.C.
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Specifically, some Canadian Lawyer jokes might bunch some pants Hamster lover!
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Mittens
climber
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How do you make a girl cum?
-Who cares?!
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drljefe
climber
Old Pueblo, AZ
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What's the difference between pink and purple?
your grip.
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ex-bouldergirl
Boulder climber
boulder, co
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Bad spellers of the world untie.
Friction is a drag.
Always be sincere, even if you don't mean it
Things are more like they used to be than they are now.
If practice makes perfect, and nobody's perfect, why practice?
A clear conscience is merely the result of bad memory.
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le_bruce
climber
Oakland: what's not to love?
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Q:What do Japanese men do when they have erections?
A:They vote.
Q: What do you call a Frenchman wearing sandals?
A: Philippe Philoppe
Shortish:
A man walked into the produce section of his local supermarket and asked to buy half a head of lettuce. The boy working in that department told him that they only sold whole heads of lettuce. The man was insistent that the boy ask his manager about the matter.
Walking into the back room, the boy said to his manager, "Some as#@&%e wants to buy a half a head of lettuce." As he finished his sentence, he turned to find the man standing right behind him, so he added, "and this gentleman kindly offered to buy the other half." The manager approved the deal and the man went on his way.
Later the manager found the boy and said "I was impressed with the way you got yourself out of that situation earlier. We like people who think on their feet here. Where are you from, son?"
"Canada, sir," the boy replied.
"Well, why did you leave Canada?" the manager asked.
The boy said, "Sir, there's nothing but whores and hockey players up there."
"Really!" said the manager. "My wife is from Canada!"
The boy replied, "No sh#t??? Who did she play for?"
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nature
climber
Tucson, AZ
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Topic Author's Reply - Jul 1, 2010 - 10:27pm PT
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ask and you shall receive.
maybe one day I'll relate why I asked.
So far my favorites:
1) deaf-genie
2) dude in plastic wrap
3) doe coming out of the woods.
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matisse
climber
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So Twilight is like the world cup: they run around for hours, no one ever scores, and a billion fans tell you that you just don't understand.
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k-man
Gym climber
SCruz
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I'd post a joke, but I'm busier than a one-legged man in an ass-kicking contest.
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k-man
Gym climber
SCruz
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Ed is getting his yearly physical.
The doc goes "Ed, you're going to have to stop masturbating."
Ed pauses...
"Really doc? Why is that?"
"Cause I'm trying to give you an eye exam..."
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