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Freddie G.
Sport climber
Corvallis, OR
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Dec 13, 2006 - 07:12pm PT
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It's interesting how I thought that I was one of Vern's "special" climbing partners. You know, one of the few that he showed interest in. In reality it appears from all these posts that he made all his climbing partners feel this way. That was one of the many awesome things about Vern. He had endless knowledge that he was willing to share with anyone who was willing to accept it. I learned so much from him, and I'm extremely thankful that I had the opportunity to spend time with him.
The man was extremely passionate about what ever he was doing. His boundless energy and enthusiam was refreshing.
I'll miss you Vern, but I'll make sure I pass on the lessons you have taught me.
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ent
climber
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Dec 13, 2006 - 10:15pm PT
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I won't be at JT this weekend but will think of all of you that are there sharing memories of Vern. I still can't believe that I won't hear him say, 'Kimberly, really?' or have me peer through a microscope at an insect that I have NO clue what it is and say 'Isn't that cool? Have you ever seen anything like it? What do you think it is?'. I would just smile and say 'I have no clue. So what's been going on these days?' knowing the next hour would fly by.
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staalbird
climber
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Dec 14, 2006 - 02:40am PT
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Many friends have so far described Vern's incredible spirit. Here are some of my stories: Vern arrived in Humboldt for our wedding (I am married to his sister Patty living now here in Micronesia) and upon finding out that we were to be married in an old growth grove 45 miles from our house in Trinidad, he began completely overhauling my mountain bike while listening to the Clash. Up until late at night he left pre dawn for the wedding site on my bike, relishing the endorphins over the use of fossil fuels, and arriving before all of us. I came to realize that this was really a mainstay of his character; while many of us talk about living PC, Vern was an absolute doer, with no bullshit in between.
On a subsequent trip walking together down a suburban street in Boulder with my son and I, Vern suddenly with a loud exclamation, pointing to a bush, then getting down on hands and knees (while cars rushed by) and for the next 10 min. super enthusiastically described the entire evolution of this BUG clinging to an inner root of the plant.
The essence of Vern as I experienced him was just this raw intensity of living life fully and not wasting too much time on
(or any time !) on anything that isn't vital. I look at the pictures put on this site of him up on the rock and its all there. Its clearly where he felt fully present and fully vital.
We talked about that once; How contained within the present moment is this incredible power, and his relating that it was on the rock that his concentration became so intense that everything that didn't matter was pushed outside the confines of the 3 or 4 square fee of just him and the rock.
The last time I saw him (two summers ago) he was harvesting these organic carrots that he had grown in his back yard. They were beautifully big, deep orange. He handed me one and locked his eyes with mine and with that big grin said, "Do you believe
it !!!! TASTE IT ! TASTE IT !"
Mark Staal
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looking sketchy there...
Social climber
Latitute 33
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Dec 14, 2006 - 12:25pm PT
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As a follow-up to the Memorial for Vern:
If you can, bring a disc with any photos of Vern you would like to share; we will have a digital projector at the Community Center.
A number of people are flying into Ontario airport on Saturday or Sunday. I'd be happy to try to put people in touch with each other to share rides to Josh.
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BMPD
Sport climber
Portland, Oregon
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Dec 14, 2006 - 07:13pm PT
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Vern was such a great mentor to me, and I have learned so much from him. There was still so much more that I wanted to learn from him. He would always tell me about Jtree, and now that I will be down there for the memorial, I would love to climb some of Verns favorites, and some of the ones that he did FA's on. I would also like to hike out to the crag that is named after him and climb some of those routes too. I might only ever make it to Jtree this one time, so I am going to climb it how Vern has always showed me: 20 routes a day, and running from one climb to the next. Is there anyone who has climbed there with Vern available to climb on Mon or Tues, or both?
-BD
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a.s.
Big Wall climber
SF, CA
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Dec 14, 2006 - 08:35pm PT
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did Vern teach at St. Olaf college in MN about 10 yrs ago or so?
edit:
I thought I recognized him -- we went climbing just once at Taylor's Falls, east of the twin cities.
He was a really great guy, I'm sorry to hear the news.
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Verns Sister
climber
Saipan Micronesia
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Dec 14, 2006 - 11:00pm PT
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Hi, I'm Vern's sister, Patty, and would like everyone know how much your memories and stories and thoughts regarding Vern have helped me through the rollercoaster of emotions I am experiencing. First shock/sadness to guilt/remorse to acceptance/peace, then back to the top to start all over again. It has been surreal, like out of a novel..... part of what makes it harder for me is that I am so far away living in Micronesia. So, everyone's stories have helped me stay connected.
I’m stoked (vern always laughed when I used that term) that you are holding a memorial at Joshua Tree and that so many are planning to be there! I will be there in spirit and am sending a story of my own to share. Thank you also for combining the mourning (for there is no way out of it but to go through it) with a celebration of his passage into perhaps the biggest adventure we have all yet to take!
Thanks again, and Vern,
I love you, Bro! Patty
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Elisa Shackelton
climber
Craig, CO
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Dec 15, 2006 - 01:59pm PT
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Thank you SO much for the wonderful memories of Vern and testimonies of friendship that everyone is sharing on this forum. Your comments are making a huge contribution toward the healing process for all of Vern's family members and friends, especially those of us who haven't gotten to spend much time with him in the past few years. This year, Vern's 3 oldest children turned 16 (Clara), 18 (Mike) and 21 (Jenna). Several of you got to meet the kids on various rock climbing adventures on which they spent a week with their Dad, Tara and Quinlan in California or Oregon--they will cherish these memories for as long as they live. Thanks to each of you who spent time with Vern, and shared a piece of yourself (or your climbing equipment, car stereo, music, etc.)with him...I know you meant the world to Vern!
Elisa
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Slider_up
Ice climber
Irvine, CA
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Dec 15, 2006 - 02:03pm PT
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Yes.
Vern taught at St. Olaf for a brief period in before moving to Washington I believe.
JP
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rfxs
climber
Bozeman, MT
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Dec 15, 2006 - 05:57pm PT
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I first met Vern when he took a position as a visiting professor at Whitman College in Walla Walla, Washington during the Fall of 1999. I signed up for the required ecology class not expecting it to direct my career path in the way it eventually did. At the end of the first semester of my sophomore year, I vividly remember talking with Vern about signing up for his special topics course on entomology. I told him I didn’t think I could make the 8 am class three days a week. I asked him if it was going to be cool…and he gave me one of those Vern like responses…Of course it is going to be cool Reecheee! He had such a unique enthusiasm for everything that there was no way I couldn’t sign up for the class. His extraordinary enthusiasm for insects and life and learning made me want be passionate and intense. I would show up 15 min. late for the 8am class – my eyes still glued together with sleep, often hung-over and he would stop lecturing and exclaim “Reecheee, you made it!” I even remember a time that he called me in the morning from the college radio show at 7:30 asking if I was awake yet or not. He broke the mold of a college entomology professor and there is not doubt in my mind that I am a more complete person because of his mentoring and friendship.
I am meeting with a friend of mine today that was lucky enough to take the same entomology class and we both can’t think of a professor we had during college that has stuck with us in the same way that Vern did. My heart goes out to all of the people that have known Vern in all the different contexts of his life.
Rick "Reechee" Smith
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Jay Bancroft
Social climber
Bakersfield, CA
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Dec 15, 2006 - 09:59pm PT
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Hi friends of Vern,
I am so sad and sorry to hear about Vern. He was such a true dude, and I’ve missed him since leaving KSU. I wish I got to spend some time with him over the last years. He was right out here (I live in Bakersfield) and I didn’t know it :-( He didn’t keep up with Ento folks, but we talked about him each year at ESA meetings (the KSU mixer was last Monday). What I am feeling right now is hard to put into words. RIP. I will try to make it to JT, but either way I'd enjoy catching up with some of the folks in the future to commemorate Vern.
Jay Bancroft (661)344.2208
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mark
climber
san diego, ca
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Dec 15, 2006 - 10:33pm PT
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Vern was it, he had the first word on the 5.11 and 5.12 testpieces in JT. I will always remember his note to me re: Iron Maiden in JT. (not precise, loosing mind) this is a good route and solid 5.11d, MAN, if you have climbed it, you know it's darn hard and Vern knows the good JT routes. Rock on...
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Draft Horse
climber
Manitou Springs, CO
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Dec 15, 2006 - 11:57pm PT
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I first met Vern in a junior high baseball game, met him by giving up a hit and a few runs batted in to him. We later played on the same team in high school where we hit it off and became fast friends. At Indian Rock near his home in Evergreen we watched the city lights of Denver and vehemently condemned the city and its cars and smog and light, drinking beer we 'borrowed' from his dad's keg. Watching the full moon rise we howled like coyotes with delight. Now I howl in sadness and shock.
Vern led me into loving many of my current passions. Gardening, farming, botany, canning. He always was asking me to 'Check it out! Check it out!' with a huge grin and laugh. In Kansas we rode all over the plains and he was always exclaiming at the beauty. I'm so sad to know I'll never here that exclamation again. Or here one of his nicknames, ie draft horse or spittlebug.Vern I wish we could of had one more ride together.
-Mark Slater
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Michel Cavigelli
climber
Greenbelt, Maryland
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Dec 16, 2006 - 05:00pm PT
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Hi,
I am not a climber and probably will never be but I am very grateful for all those who have shared their stories and photos about Vern. Sounds like he was still the same intense, driven, funny, honest, loud music-loving, nature-loving, idea-spouting, low environmental impact, unique guy I first met in 1985 when we were both interns at The Land Institute in Salina, Kansas. (In his memory, I'm blasting Talking Heads, which, along with Butthole Surfers (before they became popular) and Skinny Puppy, was perhaps his favorite band in 1985).
The news of Vern's death comes as a shock. I would never have expected Vern to take his life. He was so full of energy and wanted to share all the joy he experienced with everyone around him. ISN'T THAT COOL, MICHEL?? MICHEL?? he'd badger me about insects, music, whatever caught his attention. He was too much at times but I loved him and he was an inspiration for his committment and intensity. I still find it hard to believe. It made no sense to me. When another intern at the Land committed suicide a few years after we were there, Vern and I talked and he could not understand how someone could do that. When the world is so full of wonder, how could someone kill themselves, hw would ask? And now, he has. The comments I read on the web from those of you who knew him well, esp. recently, were very helpful to give me an idea why he might have done this and in retrospect it makes some sense from the perspective of manic-depression. But still...I wish I could have experienced his intensity some more. Your comments, helped me relive the joy of being with him. Thanks.
I spoke with another intern from 1985 upon hearing the news and she remembered the same lines from Talking Heads' "Stay up Late", that he loved to sing to us soon after the birth of one of his children: "He's just a little plaything, Why not wake him up, Cute Cute little baby, little pee-pee, little toes...baby, baby, please let me hold you..we want to make him stay up all night". We both have those words embedded in our brains thanks to Vern.
I had not spoken with him for more than 10 years but I always think of him when I listen to Talking Heads. I had tried to Google him a number of times in the last few years to touch base but no current information seemed to pop up. Now his name pops up right away. I'm grateful to those of you who have written in to fill in some of the details of his life since we both left Kansas (we were both in grad school at Kansas State U together, too). I remember him climbing the field house. He insisted that I join him and I'll remember him for his intensity that you have all captured so well in your comments. I missed him before I learned of his death and will now miss him forever. I'm very sad.
I'm so sorry for his family but was very happy to hear from Elisa that his older kids were able to spend some quality time with him doing what he loves this past summer. My thoughts and prayers are with you Elisa and kids and all his family members.
Michel
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osmiumtet
Social climber
KY
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Dec 16, 2006 - 08:48pm PT
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Hi all,
I went to grad school with Vern back at Kansas State. Like other people I lost touch with him, but always thought about him every so often. He was a passonate guy and I wish I stayed in better touch with him. I remember the time I road bikes with him and also the one time he had me hanging off the side of the old stadium at KSU. Miss you buddy..
Roland Hilgarth
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inhisfootsteps
Sport climber
the
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Dec 16, 2006 - 08:55pm PT
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Sincere condolences to family and friends. You are all in my thoughts-
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Slider_up
Ice climber
Irvine, CA
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Dec 18, 2006 - 11:15am PT
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"Vern and I talked and he could not understand how someone could do that. When the world is so full of wonder, how could someone kill themselves, hw would ask? And now, he has"
----------------------------------------------------
When I first heard the news I tried to call Tara and ended up reaching her Mom. At the time I was very angry with Vern about his decision. But in a few simple words she quelled my anger when she said "He was sick! And that's all that can be said."
It's hard to imagine the pain depression can cause unless you've been there. I have, but probably not anywhere near what Vern was experiencing. It can and will make you do things you wouldn't otherwise do during healthy times. Coming to grips with this concept has definately calmed a great deal of my frustration with this situation.
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ent
climber
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Dec 18, 2006 - 12:12pm PT
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I too was angry, sometimes still am, and have been told by others that I will probably be off and on for a long time. Sure I can understand someone saying Vern was sick. Having spent time with him in Corvallis, however, I can also say that he experienced a 'snowball effect' of one bad thing after another. I have spent hours thinking about the past few months of his life and concluded, sick or not, it would have taken a heck of a lot for anyone to recover from the consecutive blows he experienced. I miss him and wish him peace.
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looking sketchy there...
Social climber
Latitute 33
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Dec 19, 2006 - 01:51pm PT
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We would like to thank the many friends of Vern that traveled from far and wide (by car and plane) to remember the wonderful man that was Vern Stiefel. Conditions were appropriately "challenging." At one point, a few scattered snowflakes fell among us. Vern would not have been dissuaded from getting in some good routes.
It was very powerful to hear people speak, and later to confide in and share with others. For me, it felt like a process of healing could begin -- and perhaps I could begin to forgive myself for not having done more for Vern. Many of us are grappling with guilt.
Perhaps Vern is still teaching me a lesson: To show more compassion and to reach out to share with others. Life is precious, perhaps more than we know.
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ent
climber
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Dec 19, 2006 - 01:59pm PT
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Thank you for posting the photos.
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