Stonemaster Stories, IX – The Eternal brotherhood

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henny

Social climber
The Past
Apr 7, 2006 - 12:40am PT
Yeap, about as much as the Sahara has.
bvb

Social climber
flagstaff arizona
Apr 7, 2006 - 12:46am PT
don't TOY with me, henny. you mess with the BULL, you'll get the HORNS. did pinkbug on my third try last christmas vaca. sure, being 6'2" with a +2 ape index helps, plus beyond-perfect conditions, but i still got game, you know what i'm saying???

OB(Original Boulderer)WOODSONSANTEESOCALFLYWEIGHT4LYFE!!!!!!!!

hoping to go to san diego mid-week, hang a day or two, drive up to KP's on thursday with a quick stop at the 'do on the way. if this plan comes to pass, you can bet i'll post advance notice. i hate shredding up another local's area without them being there you get burned off, know what i'm sayin'?????@!!?11?>?
bvb

Social climber
flagstaff arizona
Apr 7, 2006 - 12:49am PT
sketchy: your description of the imaginary dialogue between KP and DH bagging the grades was so spot-on the wife got out of bed to see what i was laughing so hard about. that's exactly what those guys sound like.....!
henny

Social climber
The Past
Apr 7, 2006 - 12:53am PT
OK, one thing at a time. Vogel, I can't believe you. I mean, really. I can't believe you actually have the nerve to call US sandbaggers. That's like the rooster calling the hens chickens. I don't even vaugely remember downrating even one single Rubidoux problem. They are what they are. Just giving them high ratings doesn't somehow make them harder than they are. Sometimes reality is a drag but there's not much we can do about it.

OK bvb, now you're starting to upset me...
looking sketchy there...

Social climber
Latitute 33
Apr 7, 2006 - 12:58am PT
Henny, birds of a feather...
henny

Social climber
The Past
Apr 7, 2006 - 01:13am PT
Regarding the Coathanger. The year before (at the first Rubidoux contest) we had eye-balled the problem but didn't have time to try it. But, being the generous guys we are we put the problem in the contest as the bonus problem. At 25 points. Not even one taker. We couldn't understand it. A golden opportunity for someone to rob the locals of a plum and no one even took the bait. We did the problem following the first contest and found out that we would have been giving someone a bunch of extra points for absolutely nothing. The next year we fixed that and the problem was in the contest at its correct rating of 19 points. Funny thing though... Woodward did it and swore it was downright HORRENDOUS. He never could seem to figure out how it went from 25 to 19 points in one year. (Let's see, the problem decreased in value by 6 points in one year. Given that rate of decrease, the problem would be worth something like a whopping -113 points if there was another contest this year.)

Regarding Flabob. During the contest rumors started to run rampant that problems that didn't even go were in the contest at 19 points (Flabob was one of them). This seemed to piss KP off for some reason. He snapped and went down to Flabob where he used the toprope and marked every single hold (the tic marks: true) and even gave the sequence out to anyone who would listen. There was still nobody that sent. I know, sad, but some of the problems were sterilized with a TR for the contest. Hey, part of the thrill of Flabob was the landing and the odds that you would go down the hill... And probably more than once...

sketchy: Birds of a feather? Maybe so...

muir: How far would you need to run to get up the Coathanger?


henny

Social climber
The Past
Apr 7, 2006 - 01:32am PT
Now, back to you bvb. Here's a good single day 10 problem circuit for you that I did: Bullethead, Highbrow, Smultzie's Demise, The Ex, The Pink Pug, In My Time of Dimes, Funky Later, Middle of the Road Madness, Flabob, and Mantlelectomy. The biggest problem is having enough tips to finish them all.

Seriously, if you go to the 'do you should let us know. Maybe some of us could make it. There's a few problems that you don't want to miss, for sure.

And I don't doubt that you still got game. The question is, you got enough game? It's all about who's still standin' when the dumptrucks finally run out of sand...

Tell you what. If the above circuit isn't hard enough for you, here's one that I would really like to do sometime. Flabob, Middle of the Road Madness, Bullethead, The Ex, Pyschoanalysis, The White Bowser, Hair Trigger, 10b On the Outside, Coathanger, and The Octopus. Go for it!
rmuir

Social climber
the Time Before the Rocks Cooled.
Apr 7, 2006 - 11:38am PT
Now, Henny Penny... You're loading some high-quality sand into that poor boy's bag there! (Danger, Will Vanbelle! Danger!)

Chicken, you should start Vanbelle off on some easier Rubidoux classics. Something like, say, Middle Triple Crack (as it was called in the 1984 Bouldering Contest map) up near Smooth Sole Wall. Fry calls it the Center Crack in his guide. After all, it's only 10a.

But, of course, that's using BOTH hands. Bob, for the bigger sandbag, put that onto the regular circuit as a one-hander (right hand only). Talk about a parlor trick! And that's been on the Rubidoux standard tour for thirty years.
bvb

Social climber
flagstaff arizona
Apr 7, 2006 - 12:19pm PT
hey, i did hardy boys on my 2nd try with mike paul in '77 or '78. does that get me extra credit, or better yet a stay of execution on my death sentence?

henny, of that list you mentioned, the only ones i've done (that i know of) are pinkbug and in my time of dimes. 10b on the outside sounds familiar, but you know, i've never really had a proper tour -- always wound up wandering from boulder to boulder with the san diego posse, scoping lines and trying stuff. i'd enjoy a proper tour very much, even if i do end the day with sand in my teeth and fire retardant all over my face....

roubidoux and santee: twins, seperated at birth? discuss.
G_Gnome

Social climber
Tendonitis City
Apr 7, 2006 - 03:03pm PT
Naw, Roubidoux hurts way more than Santee. I actually like bouldering at Santee, I get spanked and have my fingers ripped off at that other place. Of course it could be that I was with KP and Waugh at the time and there are no two bigger sandbaggers than them.
TC

Social climber
No matter where you go, there you are.
Apr 7, 2006 - 03:28pm PT

Cycling togs, wool not lycra. That's going back.
Ed Hartouni

Trad climber
Livermore, CA
Apr 7, 2006 - 03:31pm PT
ok, now I am starting to remember why I never played with you guys back in the day... not that I could have climbed at your level... but, you all are arguing over the subjective difficulty of a bunch of boulder problems assigned points in some 30+ year old competition? the honor of it??

...anyone else care to provide some perspective?

looking sketchy there...

Social climber
Latitute 33
Apr 7, 2006 - 03:40pm PT
Ed, its just a warm up. People are getting limber and staging the set-ups before the big slander fest.
bvb

Social climber
flagstaff arizona
Apr 7, 2006 - 04:00pm PT
shorttimer, if you didn't get your tips shredded to ribbons at santee, you were not given a "proper" tour of the more "amusing" problems. santee has some slice n' dice razors that you get one or two chances on, then you'll be looking at fine, surgically-precise incisions right across the top third of your pads that go right down to the meat. oh YEAH baby, bring on the dimes!!!
rbolton

Social climber
The home for...
Apr 7, 2006 - 04:00pm PT
Ed,

'Cause it's f*cking funny, man! Three of the biggest
sand truck drivers ever to wear tight shoes (not that there
is anything wrong with that) arguing over a problem that
NO one is going to do is hysterical. More so if you can hear Henny
clucking, Powell moaning and Randy explaining to everyone EXACTLY
how the world works.
G_Gnome

Social climber
Tendonitis City
Apr 7, 2006 - 04:04pm PT
We should all adjourn to the 'sick midgets wall' this summer to see who can still bring it. Bob, you aren't qualified to climb there so you can be the judge. And Waugh is excluded cause he is a mutant.
bvb

Social climber
flagstaff arizona
Apr 7, 2006 - 04:11pm PT
so...you saying the sick midgets wall is all, like, 5.9's and 5.10's? i could wear my converse all-stars if ya wanna even out the odds a bit....


rmuir

Social climber
the Time Before the Rocks Cooled.
Apr 7, 2006 - 04:17pm PT
Ed. Don't for a minute believe that anyone posting here believes in the remotest possiblity of an objective rating system for bouldering problems. V, B, YDS or points, it means nothing at all. As Randall states, we're just stretching. (Both the truth and the slander muscles.) Just sit back and enjoy the show. We'll try not to hit anyone in the cross fire.

Just a wee bit o' fun.

And for gawd's sake, don't take any of this personal (or serious)... We certainly don't.



"It all means nothing at all, and, howling for his milky mum, for her cawl and buttermilk and cowbreath and Welshcakes and the fat birth-smelling bed and moonlit kitchen of her arms, he'll never forget as he paddles blind home through the weeping end of the world."--Under Milkwood by Dylan Thomas.
Ed Hartouni

Trad climber
Livermore, CA
Apr 7, 2006 - 04:18pm PT
thanks... that it explains it... I thought you might all be serious...

but everyone who knows me knows how literally I take this stuff.
bvb

Social climber
flagstaff arizona
Apr 7, 2006 - 04:21pm PT
ed, anybody can climb hard. the real contest here is who can sling the best, funniest, most merciless and ruthless slander in the shortest possible period of time.

it goes without saying, i suppose, that i'm winning.
Messages 21 - 40 of total 100 in this topic << First  |  < Previous  |  Show All  |  Next >  |  Last >>
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