Sobriety (off topic or not)?


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Social climber
Elk Grove, California
Aug 15, 2015 - 01:09pm PT
On Near Twenty Six Years Sober

I woke that day to some clarity.
It was as if someone woke me by dumping a wheelbarrow full of bricks onto my face.
The epiphany was,
I was in some serious sh#t with the family, the wife, the heart, the health, the mind, and my life.
The result?
I got help.
Am still learning that almost everything I need, I already have in the first place,
less the addictions and compulsions,
plus more than I could ever have dreamed of.
I discovered that most of my problems were of my own making.
The rest?
Itís just what happens to most of us along the way.
my sobriety date lives on in the infamy of my mind,
Thatís a good thing.
Plus the living sober reality of experiencing life.
Good experiences and bad experiences,
but still,
itís a life.
Oh sure there is always more to want out of life.
But who could expect more than living?


Aug 15, 2015 - 08:45pm PT
thanks for the stoke, hippielogger. after three weeks it got a LOT easier.

made it a whole month as of last thursday (i think?). i was at a friend's bbq tonight and i fell off the wagon in two ways. i had some ribs and a bacon wrapped stuffed jalepeno (i'm a vegetarian but it was tasty) and i made a jack-lemonade-tonic which i consumed. that was it though. i just finished my drink and went home. didn't even get that buzzed but still didn't get any urges to keep drinking. i'm pretty proud of myself for going a month, though. i had a really nice epiphany the other night while i was driving around and thought "it is not possible for me to get a dui right now."

Social climber
flagstaff arizona
Aug 15, 2015 - 09:25pm PT
Just checked my sobriety counter and I've 1 1/2 years tomorrow! Awesome life, chock-a-block full of "24 karat regular-people problems." It's marvelous when you don't bother to even keep track anymore. But I am gonna pick up that "whiner chip!"

Social climber
Wolf City, Wyoming
Aug 16, 2015 - 06:20am PT
I was about as tempted as could be, the last few days. There was a bad personal situation that I Coud have just numbed and tried to avoid with say a pint of vodka. But I didn't, and im feeing better just living through it.

Thank gawd for rock climbing!!!

I think climbing may be my 'higher power'

Sport climber
Sonora Ca
Aug 16, 2015 - 07:17am PT
Right on guys and gals!

Gym climber
A dingy corner in your refrigerator
Aug 16, 2015 - 10:28am PT
This just out, 33 days. Girlfriend no likey me drink. Hasn't been the first one . Gave it up, took it out of the equation. Feel better being a real person for her. She's ecstatic,I don't feel like sh#t some mornings, my mind feels clearer and I feel mature, go figure. Oh and my belly has shrunk ! I would sell any beer industry stock you hold before they get wind of this new development. For some reason I can't stay away from macaroni and cheese though, and chocolate. HELP !!!!

Social climber
Wolf City, Wyoming
Aug 20, 2015 - 08:19am PT
Nice work Penns!

Trad climber
dancin on the tip of god's middle finger
Aug 20, 2015 - 09:01am PT
i'll grab a reign
pull this wagon up
the hill for a spell.

the wifey gave me the ultimatum:
either she or the drink has got to go.

I like her more.

now got me one of those
mornings where my melancholy
collides with stress
which collide with
the detox hormones
and general confusion
blankets me with
dark thoughts.

oh the lovely hell within my heart.

Social climber
Wolf City, Wyoming
Aug 20, 2015 - 09:55am PT
It's a start!
The journey of a thousand miles....

Social climber
Elk Grove, California
Aug 20, 2015 - 10:49am PT

Having contemplated my experience,
Having ingurgitated unequivocally on a road not unlike Norwegian's road,
Well, not all the same little side roads and scenery,
Not all the little bumps or steep mountain grades,
Nor even all the little dips and deep valleys,

But at the centerline of mutual death I've stared,
At the participate experience we've risked,
Where with minor swerve or misstep the serpentine tragedy of Nephthys unfurls to plunge her viperous claws through sinew, nerves, and bone,

Or if not with merciful death she would leave us lingering to lie awake to waste to rot,
Exploding our swollen organs slippery and brown,
The purple veinous puss bloated skin rupturing and spilling gangrenous lime ripe stench,
About the empty room,
Where our last breaths to take,
Our tear ducts dried and puffing dust to hitchhike onto the humid vaporous fumes of our wet brained last exhalations,

I believed that the one good woman I ever loved,
Had walked out of my life for good,
Good on her I said,
And I drank as yet my final bender,
Stacking the bottles high,
Onto my rickety homemade desk,
With cinder blocks and shelves of gray,
There were red ones and green ones and hues of blue,
Bottles of beer from England to Mexico,
From Amsterdam to Tokyo,
And from Dublin no doubt,

Sudzenly the red brick of the dawn horizon dawned down on me,
Me and the fried sick pain brain of my alcoholic beer infected bodily tissues,

Of course it was all only for effect,

Alone alone alone at last,
No woman or kinders to pester me,
Or to give warm embrace and laugh,
Or to see my eyes seeing in their eyes what love we had,
What love we felt,
What love,

Oh gone she was,
What love she was,
And I alone at last,
To drink myself to death,
A lonely bitter alcoholic numb and selfish death,

F*#k all that.
How would I learn to live with myself?
How does a person learn to rectify past mistakes?
How can they live by themselves with themselves and being alcoholic, decide to live and not drink, and not die alone from the drinking?
Such an ugly, desperate, lonely, sickening death.

It's was a choice.
I wanted to live.

And she came back,
And she wanted nothing to do with watching me dying.
And she was ready to leave me again,
Before letting me take her over that centerline,
One more time again.



Trad climber
Aug 20, 2015 - 10:55am PT
Best of luck to those recently quitted, and on the 1.5, BVB!

Good for you, Jaybro, for choosing not to drink.

I have my next anniversary coming next Wednesday; 19 years it will be. I cannot believe how lucky I have been. Plenty of people have worked a lot harder than me to stay away from drinking and still succumbed. Nonetheless, if I try to imagine what my life would be like had I picked up somewhere along this continuum, I don't see something very enticing. Yes, I did like the lushy feeling of being drunk, but I can say for sure that I would be one yucky lush. Not someone others would want to be forced to tolerate.

Trad climber
Aug 26, 2015 - 09:38am PT
19 years sober, today. It often feels like just a few months have gone by since "that day," but so much has happened since. Don't miss the drinking, one bit. (But notice that I NOTICE that I don't drink....still crazy, after all these years...).

Social climber
flagstaff arizona
Aug 26, 2015 - 12:01pm PT
Good going grrl. I must be one of the lucky ones because the thought never even enters my mind. Ever. As though ETOH does not even exist. Of course, I paid a high price for that blessing.

The Good Places
Sep 8, 2015 - 07:09pm PT
The pulltab and the damage done
The pulltab and the damage done
Credit: thebravecowboy

Trad climber
dancin on the tip of god's middle finger
Sep 10, 2015 - 06:57pm PT
cowboy the moon weeps for me.

tonight i pledged to my two daughters:

"let the hills be my witness,
i'll not take another sip of
beer or otherwise alcohol for
the next 5 years."

my little Annapurna spoke up:

"dad. don't do 5. wait until
your 50, cause i turn 21 two days
after you turn 50. then
we can have one together."

that's good ceremony
and a worthy goal,
so i tacked on an additional 4 years,
what the hell?.

now i'm an alcoholic on pause
for the next 9 years.

my 40th year closes in a month,
and it has been extraordinary in
many regards.

but i'm keen for an inner-culture
change so i'm taking one.

it's too little, too late
in some regards,
and too much, too soon
in others.

i got tons of vigor
and its gotta course somewhere.

i'll put it into my parenting
and perhaps drop down some
structured prose, or what not.

i'm gonna climb a little harder
and take good care of
my two companies.

and just try to get along
with and thus launch
my budding children into

in ten years, though,
watch out.

Social climber
joshua tree
Sep 10, 2015 - 09:55pm PT

tonight i pledged to my two daughters:

It's great to put pledges out there from us adults to the young generation. You staying true to the pledge over the days and years as they keep tally will unequivocally become more important to them than to you. And honor and dignity will be your reward : D

Funny there's never any honor OR dignity in starting to drink ; /

Ice climber
Pomfert VT
Sep 11, 2015 - 03:36am PT
Holy shitz. aug 25th came and went and i totally spaced my 9th bday. happies must have been arround then as well. hope everyone is doing ok!
SC seagoat

Trad climber
Santa Cruz, Moab or In What Time Zone Am I?
Sep 11, 2015 - 07:23am PT


Trad climber
Sep 11, 2015 - 10:54am PT
Staying the course.

My one year was a 7/24.

Bagged our first summit with reason number 1.

Credit: treez

I'm fortunate like BVB, it's no work at all. The thought of taking a drink is repulsive.

And this is the hardest time of my life.

Keep it up everyone.

Trad climber
dancin on the tip of god's middle finger
Sep 16, 2015 - 06:33am PT
ah innithat cute.
sons and daughters everywhere
enjoying fresh dads
the dust only in our past.

gleaming present, much better for all.

except for me.
i want.

a week into to my 10 year counter-binge;

i used to just hate life,
now i love hating life.

songs sound sour.
sunrises lack candor.
sleep is fitful.

a deep ebb in inspiration.
limp libido.

ahh inn'that cute,
i got my inner-culture change;
i'm saving my marriage,
sparing my liver,
insulating the wallet,
smiling at cops,
perking up my fathering-glands.
making money,
happy clients.

even my gas smells better.

f*#k sobriety,
i'm its slave for
9 more years.

but i earned my sentence
and i'll see it through.

steadfastly shoving a silken reality
down eternity's bramble path.
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