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Yury
Mountain climber
T.O.
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Jul 19, 2015 - 01:52pm PT
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Hi Karen,
I would like to describe some mitigation strategies.
It took me awhile to learn how to deal with stress and overtime at work. Eventually I developed the following approach:
Project Manager: Yury, can you work this Saturday?
Yury: I have some family commitments and need to check with my wife.
Next day:
Project Manager:?
Yury: My wife has not approved a request for me to work this weekend.
Also you need to develop better attitude towards your job.
Do not feel responsible for outcome of your job if you have no control over Scope/Schedule/Quality targets. You just need to do your best (also taking care of yourself).
Does LMFT stand for “Licensed Marriage and Family Therapists”?
In this case you can spend e.g. 45 minutes out of allocated 60 minutes per session and spend remaining 15 minutes to complete your paperwork. As a result you would not be required to work on your day off.
Your impact on you patients in 45 minutes may be lower but you need to remember to take care of yourself as well.
If you overburdened yourself with a sense of responsibility, the best solution is not to treat your job that seriously. Detach yourself from your job. Treat your job as a game or a simulation.
Some companies consciously run their people to the ground by non-sustainable workload. Then in several years they would dump spent workers and hire new ones.
Again you can use two approaches I described above to deal with such organization.
I was surprised to learn that even if you do not 100% comply with their requests they typically are content even with people who try to create a more balanced workload for themselves.
I am not saying that you do not need to see a doctor.
Some people are able to deal with such mild depression with a change in behavior and attitude.
Others need a professional help.
Good luck Karen,
I wish you faster recovery.
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Brokedownclimber
Trad climber
Douglas, WY
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Jul 19, 2015 - 02:00pm PT
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locker-
Rodger singing is NOT a nice thing.... Get earplugs.
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Karen
Trad climber
Casper, Wyoming
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Jul 19, 2015 - 03:30pm PT
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Another therapist friend of mine told me to not work harder than my clients and boy is she correct. I do need to end the sessions in 45 min.
Thank you all for your kind words and yes locker, I need to climb. However, sitting 40 + hours a week my fitness has bonked. Way too tired and hungry to exercise after work, I'm so beat usually in bed by 8pm, even with getting to bed early does little to lesson my fatigue.
I will take all of your suggestions and for sure try less to stress about my performance.
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GDavis
Social climber
SOL CAL
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Jul 19, 2015 - 10:20pm PT
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Last two days I trained a little bit after ~11 hour shifts. Very easy shifts, mind you, but I feel ya. That's the real indicator to me that it was time to go, keeping my physical self feeling as well as my.... financial... self.
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rottingjohnny
Sport climber
mammoth lakes ca
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Jul 20, 2015 - 05:27am PT
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Most therapists are quacks...Like Dr. Crankster for example...
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Karen
Trad climber
Casper, Wyoming
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Jul 20, 2015 - 05:56am PT
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Working at Walmart is sounding more appealing ...
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Tobia
Social climber
Denial
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Jul 20, 2015 - 06:05am PT
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Karen, I hope you find some coping mechanisms to help you deal with your pain.
I sent you a an email via the taco, did you receive it?
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Karen
Trad climber
Casper, Wyoming
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Jul 20, 2015 - 08:22am PT
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Tobia, remember to send any email to:
Mtnclimber59@ yahoo.co
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SC seagoat
Trad climber
Santa Cruz, Moab or In What Time Zone Am I?
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Jul 20, 2015 - 08:24am PT
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Thinking of you Karen. I know you made some HUGE changes.
Susan
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Karen
Trad climber
Casper, Wyoming
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Jul 20, 2015 - 07:51pm PT
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Susan,
I did make a huge change thinking it would be a fresh start. Well, the job is taking me down and as much as I disliked Ca beginning to wish I'd stayed put.
There is one redeeming factor, I have a wonderful ST boyfriend up here but without him not sure what I would do.
Nonetheless, my dark thoughts haunt me and at times not sure how I will endure.
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Tobia
Social climber
Denial
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Jul 29, 2015 - 04:24pm PT
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**
ms. nita
as does adderall. :)
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Big Mike
Trad climber
BC
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Jul 29, 2015 - 05:34pm PT
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Skitch- Oh man! You sound like me before I broke my back bro. I hope you don't need a major catharsis, like a spinal cord injury to realize how good you have it.
Loosing it all in an instant was a harsh reality, so now getting it back I can really appreciate each and every moment as they happen, and they are that much sweeter my friend.
I suggest you change what you are doing recreationally. Find something new, that you enjoy and then you can come back to the old familiar things that you used to love when you get the urge to do them again.
Good luck my friend. The black hole is deep, and when you are in it's depth it's easy to allow yourself to wallow in it. You can rise up, but you must will yourself to do it. Fight it. Go do something. Get help. It's hard to accept it, i'm guilty of that myself. (Thanks Daphane.)
Karen- I hear you. Stop killing yourself. Do what you can. Do your best, it's all you can, but don't fricking kill yourself for these people. If they want, they can fire you and you'll probably be better off. So screw those guys.
Do your best. Fvck the rest.
Greg- Sorry to hear that. Living is more important than cash to me at the moment, but you have to decide where your priorities lie.
I'm fairly confident you will make the right decision. ;)
John- go climbing man! ;) Really sorry to hear about this crap you have to put up with at work. I hate office bs.
I'm doing better. Keeping super busy between, work, play and dating.. So distracting myself basically. I feel lighter though, which is nice.
Anyways, i'm sorry I didn't reply sooner. Hope you are all doing well.
Mike.
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skitch
Gym climber
Bend Or
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Jul 29, 2015 - 06:13pm PT
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I wish I could figure out what my major malfunction is. I get super depressed when I procrastinate at work and don't get anything done, then I get super pissed/stressed/anxious when I do try to get sh#t done. Maybe I just don't know how to do the sh#t I'm expected to do for work, and don't have anyone to help me so it makes the learning curve more difficult than it seems like it could be.
I think that I'm just a product of my environment: lazy & entitled.
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Norwegian
Trad climber
dancin on the tip of god's middle finger
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Jul 31, 2015 - 08:37am PT
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it is thoroughly exhausting
trying to keep something
alive that wants to die.
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johntp
Trad climber
socal
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Jul 31, 2015 - 11:22am PT
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I wish I could figure out what my major malfunction is. I get super depressed when I procrastinate at work and don't get anything done, then I get super pissed/stressed/anxious when I do try to get sh#t done. Maybe I just don't know how to do the sh#t I'm expected to do for work, and don't have anyone to help me so it makes the learning curve more difficult than it seems like it could be.
I think that I'm just a product of my environment: lazy & entitled.
I hear ya. Don't know what you do, but work throws us a lot of curves. Sometimes it takes me some time to gel a problem. So it goes.
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Tobia
Social climber
Denial
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Jul 31, 2015 - 01:15pm PT
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Skitch, i had the exact problem as a school teacher. i knew life science like i knew myself; but it was the organizational part of teaching and the combination of communicating w/ parents that I did not know.
i finally had the towel thrown in for me. Although i knew i was headed into some troubled waters such as no income, i felt so much relieve that i didn't care. i knew i wasn't doing a good job and it made me feel bad for the kids, their parents and the school. i was so stressed i couldn't sleep, eat and sometimes breathe.
i'm not sure of what kind of work i can do.
This may not be your situation; but the symptoms you wrote about seem like they came from me. i'm toasted, as this is a life long problem.
You may be at the wrong place doing your job.
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Big Mike
Trad climber
BC
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Jul 31, 2015 - 01:47pm PT
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Weege- That it is. Chin up bud. You got lots to live for.
The hole is a tough place to be. I feel for anyone stuck within it's depths.
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johntp
Trad climber
socal
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Jul 31, 2015 - 03:40pm PT
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i finally had the towel thrown in for me. Although i knew i was headed into some troubled waters, no income, i felt so much relieve that i didn't care. i knew i wasn't doing a good job and it made me feel bad for the kids, parents and the school. i was so stressed i couldn't sleep, eat and sometimes breathe.
I am so there. Well put.
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Tobia
Social climber
Denial
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At this point i don't think you can beat depression at all. It seems it has the edge all the time and plays with one's mind like a cat does a ball on a string.
i post here to try and offer encouragement to others as well as myself. i am now at the lowest point in years, after months of more ups than downs, more gain than loss, i got thoroughly whipped yesterday.
Other than my two dogs, that would not understand my disappearance, i have absolutely nothing i care to remain alive for. Friends and family are humans, they can figure it out, they know me and know how the black dog fights.
Forgive me for being so negative; i know it is selfish to post this and i seek nothing by doing so other than letting people know how evil this disease is.
Maybe tomorrow will be different; but how long i can continue to hold onto that philosophy is hard to judge. Where most people have a mind, i have rotten peach, rotting in the morning sun.
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