Your Worst First Ascent

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Messages 1 - 20 of total 77 in this topic << First  |  < Previous  |  Show All  |  Next >  |  Last >>
Chiloe

Trad climber
Lee, NH
Topic Author's Original Post - Mar 2, 2008 - 04:03pm PT
Who's had those days? Rubbing grit from your eyes at day's end, while thinking damn, that one's not gonna be a classic.

Jaybro

Social climber
The West
Mar 2, 2008 - 04:09pm PT
More than I care to think about. most of them, really, for awhile. 's why so few are recorded. Got better about which ones to mention, some have some damn good legs.
Brutus of Wyde

climber
Old Climbers' Home, Oakland CA
Mar 2, 2008 - 10:17pm PT
"Mobile Chimneys" on Mt. Thor in the Whitney area.

Think granite the consistency of kitty litter held together with dried egg.
Mungeclimber

Trad climber
sorry, just posting out loud.
Mar 2, 2008 - 11:12pm PT
I'm not saying nothing in this thread. I think it's a prima facie case of negligence.

lucho

Gym climber
San Franpsycho
Mar 2, 2008 - 11:37pm PT
Um where do I start? Camp 4 Wall. Most likely the route that will fall into obscurity. I always wondered why no one had ever tried to free the entire obvious wall behind the most famous climbers campground in the world. On pitch six travering across 20 ft of bay trees with pro over by my belayer that I really didnt wanna test it hit me. No one will ever repaet this. Later on pitch 11 or something digging dirt out of a 5 inch crack to place a piece again it hit me, wow really no one will repeat this pile. Then on the final pitch some hienous OW leading to the summit, it was for sure no one would want any part of this. But to this day it is one of my proudest sends and the only 15 pitch first ascent and first free ascent of a major Yosemite wall. I'm so glad I did it.
dirtineye

Trad climber
the south
Mar 3, 2008 - 12:10am PT
The one I went up with a saw in one hand and a pruning shear in the other. Ditto on the "probably nobody will ever climb this (or want to)" but they did in fact. Still, a wandering, bizzare stupid little route, with enough loose stuff after cleaning that it got called "Air of Detachment" But it was great fun, so, really, I don't think there is a worst first ascent, unless you get hurt bad doing it.

Ghost

climber
A long way from where I started
Mar 3, 2008 - 12:30am PT
An un-named POS in one of the canyons above North Vancouver that no one will ever -- EVER -- bother with. On the other hand, I was rehabing from a broken hip, unsure that I'd ever be able to climb again, and it was a major breakthrough for me just to be able to hang on a rope and scrape moss.

So, crap route, but major breakthrough for me.

D

k-man

Gym climber
SCruz
Mar 3, 2008 - 02:37am PT
Nice Lucho!

Anybody ever repeat Embarrassment of Rich's ?
Watusi

Social climber
Newport, OR
Mar 3, 2008 - 03:01am PT
I don't think youz all really want to know...
snyd

Sport climber
Lexington, KY
Mar 3, 2008 - 08:17am PT
The Last In Line 5.11a, Cookie Cliff.

Donny Reid told me that Jardine had tried it. No cleaning required but not that good a route. Certainly not worth the approach.

Jim E

climber
Mountain Road
Mar 3, 2008 - 09:22am PT
Chiloe,

In terms of suffering for the FA I think there's a few at Crag Y I may be responsible for. Then again some of the ones I suffered for the most there turned out to be pretty nice. Many others there, on the other hand, are destined to be reclaimed by the forest and erased forever. They probably were within a year or less after the FA. I'm willing to bet you're responsible for a few there as well.
Some of the highlight features: long uphill bushwhack approach, swarms of black flies, swarms of mosquitoes, ticks, stifling humidity, lots of loose rock, copious lichen, trees (you know the one), and the failed attempts at secrecy (like it mattered).
ARoberts

Trad climber
boulder, colorado
Mar 3, 2008 - 11:14am PT
About 10 years ago on the left wall of the Ice Cream Parlor in Kane Creek. I got 80' up to a dihedral choked with loose rock. I named it "Someone Should Shelak This MotherF*#ker" or AKA " Critical Mass" because I thought that was the last possible route that would go up there. Of course on my last visit someone was climbing my crappy route and there were 2 more routes put in to the left.
TwistedCrank

climber
Ideeho
Mar 3, 2008 - 11:28am PT
I dislocated my shoulder on the last and easiest 10 ft of a wonderful and untouched Wingate corner near Colorado National Monument. Talk about a deflating climbing experience!
Chiloe

Trad climber
Lee, NH
Topic Author's Reply - Mar 3, 2008 - 11:41am PT
I'm willing to bet you're responsible for a few there as well.

Seemed-like-a-good-idea-at-the-time climbs! Yeah, a bunch of those deserve to be reclaimed by the forest, as you say -- but who knows, maybe some got repeated once or twice. Your Sunkist Wall routes, and a few others like Sword of Omens or Hotel California are proud enough lines, though. Albeit, with pre-modern protection, because we didn't quite "get" the new sport-climbing ethic back then.

And then there's Last Laugh. I'm embarassed to recall how cranky I got over nothing.
Chiloe

Trad climber
Lee, NH
Topic Author's Reply - Mar 3, 2008 - 11:53am PT
Jaybro:
More than I care to think about.

Brutus:
Think granite the consistency of kitty litter held together with dried egg.

Mungeclimber:
I think it's a prima facie case of negligence.

lucho:
Um where do I start? Camp 4 Wall.

dirtineye:
The one I went up with a saw in one hand and a pruning shear in the other.

Matt:
I doubt any sane climbers ever even considered it.

Ghost:
An un-named POS in one of the canyons above North Vancouver that no one will ever -- EVER -- bother with.

Watusi:
I don't think youz all really want to know...

snyd:
Certainly not worth the approach.

ARoberts:
I named it "Someone Should Shelak This MotherF*#ker" or AKA " Critical Mass" because I thought that was the last possible route that would go up there.

TwistedCrank:
Talk about a deflating climbing experience!


It sounds like there's a mother lode of tales behind these comments, many stories just as good or better than those we tell about prettier, more famous FAs.
Ksolem

Trad climber
Monrovia, Ca
Mar 3, 2008 - 11:59am PT
My worst FA was a thing in Josh. Actually I was sitting it out on the sidelines 'cause it didn't look too good to me. Then my buddies, who started the whole mess got weak and didn't have the sack to get up there and hang on the little hook thingy to put in the bolt so they could climb above, so I had to go up and do it. Lucky no one knows where this climb is and I intend to keep it that way. Oh wait, should this be on the spraylord thread?
tolman_paul

Trad climber
Anchorage, AK
Mar 3, 2008 - 07:34pm PT
A few forgettable ones, the worst is a project I started on last summer, and will likely be re-visiting with a wrench and epoxy vs the drill and more bolts. I was looking to put up another relatively mild climb on one of our roadside crags and spotted a line that looked like it would go. I got 1/2 way up, there was a pile of loose rock just waiting to dust the belayer, nasty sharp endges to cut the rope, and just a generally contrived line up bad rock.

I named it dung heap based on what we found at the base of the route while working it, and as an apt description of the climb.

There have been others that should have never been, but that is the worst.
ontheedgeandscaredtodeath

Trad climber
San Francisco, Ca
Mar 3, 2008 - 07:51pm PT
Five or six pitch thing on a random wall in Sedona. Long approach. Brutish chickenwinging, thrashing and thrutching. Loose. So sandy that dunes formed in my eye-balls. Never to be repeated or talked about in polite company.
Bubba Ho-Tep

climber
Evergreen, CO
Mar 3, 2008 - 08:36pm PT
I can think of a number of worthless piles that I did in the South Platte here in CO that would probably qualify.

The good news is that Pete Hubell wrote the guidebook and took credit for the FA's so I won't be blamed for eternity.....
couchmaster

climber
Mar 3, 2008 - 10:06pm PT
damn, I just lost my words.

I had quite the classic tale of woe going. I', waiting as I suspect Piton Ron will be showing up with something impressive though.
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