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Jennie
Trad climber
Idaho Falls
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Topic Author's Original Post - Feb 10, 2009 - 08:27pm PT
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Dirtineye went back to the hospital today because of blockage in his bile duct which is causing him great pain.
Curt has been inactive on ST forum for over a month. Sunday, he told me the pain was so intense he had lost interest in posting here. His pain specialist has him taking maximum doses of oxycodone, but he's still quite miserable. I haven't seen other posts recently concerning Curt's condition but I'm sure his other friends, here, would be interested in knowing his situation and in sending him their best wishes.
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WoodySt
Trad climber
Riverside
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Feb 10, 2009 - 08:33pm PT
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Best wishes to Dirtineye. I've seen a couple of friends go through what he's suffering, and he's got my sympathy.
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Chaz
Trad climber
Boss Angeles
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Feb 10, 2009 - 08:35pm PT
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Chin up, Curt!
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RRK
Trad climber
Talladega, Al
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Feb 10, 2009 - 08:41pm PT
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thanks Jennie - I was out on a climbing weekend to Twall this past weekend and haven't been keeping up like I should, but Curt did call my wife while I was gone and talked to her for a couple of hours. I'll go probe her for some info and probably call his mom tomorrow. If anybody hears anything in the meantime please post up
RRK
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Gary
climber
Desolation Basin, Calif.
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Feb 10, 2009 - 08:45pm PT
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Shoot, you'd think a little less bile would do the guy a world of good.
Good luck, dirt!
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Jaybro
Social climber
wuz real!
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Feb 10, 2009 - 09:25pm PT
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keep your ducts up!
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Brunosafari
Boulder climber
Redmond, OR
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Feb 10, 2009 - 09:34pm PT
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Thanks Jennie, I've been wondering how Curt was doing, hoping the best. Let's hope this is only an unexpected tie-in, (albeit painful) on the route of recovery.
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Lynne Leichtfuss
Social climber
valley center, ca
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Feb 10, 2009 - 09:45pm PT
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Ahh, Jennie....Thanks for this Thread. Let Curt know I think of him often and pray for him. Working in Home Health Care for 20 years and being in peoples homes I have seen so much pain and suffering. The human experience is sometimes so difficult. My own hub had a terrible time near the end.
Which makes me think of Heaven. I believe Heaven is God's gift to us. We are Pilgrims here for a short time and then an incredible forever.... no pain, suffering or tears.
The most beautiful place one can't EVEN imagine.....Heaven is like El Cap and Lynne being able to climb it. Heaven is Loved ones we never knew all coming together in eternal joyfilled celebration. Heaven is Creativity of things that we have only dreamed about but never thought possible. Heaven is Music, delight, love......and Peace and Joy Beyond Comprehension.
Praying these wonderful things for our special friend, dirtineye. Smiles, Lynne
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Ezra
Social climber
WA, NC, Idaho Falls
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Feb 10, 2009 - 09:52pm PT
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Best Wishes to Dirt.
No one should be in pain in this day and age. Methadone can sometimes help with control, so I've herd.
-e
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Lynne Leichtfuss
Social climber
valley center, ca
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Feb 10, 2009 - 10:07pm PT
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Methadone can be quite dangerous due to its half life. Overdose leading to death became so prevelant in the past couple years the FDA put out a black box warning to all agencies using this drug.
IV Dilaudid or Morphine administered by a pain control pump allows pain relief and freedom to live your daily life. The PCP is carried with you in a small fanny pack...no more being attached to an IV pole.....
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Reilly
Mountain climber
Monrovia, CA
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Feb 10, 2009 - 10:18pm PT
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Get well Dirt! I will be thinkin' of ya!
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Jennie
Trad climber
Idaho Falls
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Topic Author's Reply - Feb 10, 2009 - 10:36pm PT
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Does Methadone half-life vary with one's physical size, sex, age or health ?
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noshoesnoshirt
climber
dangling off a wind turbine in a town near you
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Feb 10, 2009 - 10:46pm PT
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Keep your pecker up lad.
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dirtbag
climber
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Feb 10, 2009 - 10:55pm PT
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Other Dirt, buddy, I'm pulling for you!
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Ezra
Social climber
WA, NC, Idaho Falls
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Feb 10, 2009 - 11:12pm PT
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Jenny, one large effect on the amount of methadone needed is the person's previous exposure to opiates. A dose that would kill an opiate naive person, will hardly touch some one who has been on sizable oxycontin doses or other narcotic painkillers.
Very good hospice docs I have worked with swear by the ability of methadone to kill almost any pain.
-e
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Fletcher
Trad climber
the campfire just a ways past Chris' Taco stand
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Feb 10, 2009 - 11:12pm PT
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Sending you blessings and and good vibes, dirtineye!
Fletch
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Jennie
Trad climber
Idaho Falls
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Topic Author's Reply - Feb 10, 2009 - 11:12pm PT
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Thanks, Lois, I appreciate the information. I was curious if Methadone might have hastened my father's death a few years ago. Probanly not, but I wondered about it staying in his system longer as Lynne suggested it can.
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Jennie
Trad climber
Idaho Falls
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Topic Author's Reply - Feb 10, 2009 - 11:16pm PT
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Thanks, Ezra. My dad had been taking methadone but they switched to morphine the last day. Just wondering about methadone still being in his system.
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Ezra
Social climber
WA, NC, Idaho Falls
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Feb 10, 2009 - 11:25pm PT
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Jennie,
Methadone has a long half-life. It is impossible to say in retrospect what effects it might have had or not.
-e
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Lynne Leichtfuss
Social climber
valley center, ca
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Feb 10, 2009 - 11:42pm PT
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Jennie, if you want information I can fax or email it to you. Just give me some time, we are short staffed due to our great economy.
One needs a person experienced in converting the existence of drugs in your system, what you are currently on and their half life....then coverting to the new drug...making sure that the drug you are currently on will convert out as the new drug begins to take effect.....for example the conversion from being on morphine and then converting the patient to methadone or visa versa.
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Lynne Leichtfuss
Social climber
valley center, ca
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Feb 10, 2009 - 11:54pm PT
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LEB, methadone was given a black box label warning for a reason. :D
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Zander
Trad climber
Berkeley
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Feb 11, 2009 - 12:02am PT
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Jennie,
thanks for the post.
I've been wondering and worrying about that rascal.
Dirt, I'm wishing you all the best,
Zander
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neebee
Social climber
calif/texas
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Feb 11, 2009 - 12:11am PT
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hey there jennie and all... say, i will be keeping him in more prayers, too..
say, i had wondered, but then, i also know that recouperation can take a lot out of one, and it is hard to sit for so long... so i did not realize that something could have been wrong...
sorry to have no checked it out... say, this is a nice group of campfire climbing-folks, and none should slip through notice...
god bless you dirtineye, get well again, soon as you can...
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Redwreck
Social climber
Los Angeles, CA
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Feb 11, 2009 - 12:59am PT
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Here's to a speedy recovery, Mr. Eye.
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Lynne Leichtfuss
Social climber
valley center, ca
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Feb 11, 2009 - 01:05am PT
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So Curt, have a good night. As my Mama always said when the lights went out, Sweet Dreams Child....and God Bless you Baby.
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nita
climber
chica from chico, I don't claim to be a daisy
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Feb 11, 2009 - 01:05am PT
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Jennie, thank you for posting this info. I've been wondering and worried about Curt.
Dirt, Hoping for better days ahead....xoxo, nita
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Dick_Lugar
Trad climber
Indiana (the other Mideast)
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Feb 11, 2009 - 11:46am PT
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Dirt, get your "duct's" in a row and hope you feel better real soon!
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survival
Big Wall climber
A Token of My Extreme
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Feb 11, 2009 - 11:54am PT
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Hang in there Curt.
Supertopo is "Pulling Hard" for you.
Get well and come back.
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Robb
Social climber
It's like FoCo in NoCo Daddy-O!
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Feb 11, 2009 - 11:58am PT
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Hey CurtDirt!
Hang in there buddy-we're all pulling for ya-hope you can post up again soon.
Robb
PS: If you find yourself at a gym be careful to watch out for the chalk trundlers!
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RRK
Trad climber
Talladega, Al
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Feb 11, 2009 - 05:53pm PT
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I called his mom a few minutes ago and have this: the doctors couldn't perform the intended surgery because they could not get a tube properly positioned due to the rerouting of organs in previous surgeries. Instead they did a radiological procedure which his mother feels will be better in the long run. He will be home tonight but is very loopy (they've got him on the really good shit). She reports he is jaundiced and emotionally very low. (Hey - nowhere to go but up.) I told her that I would wait a day or do before calling to let him get his wits about him again. When I hear something I'll let you know
RRK
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Jennie
Trad climber
Idaho Falls
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Topic Author's Reply - Feb 11, 2009 - 10:44pm PT
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Thank you RRK. Sounds as if they have his pain moderated or shut down completely.
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Mighty Hiker
Social climber
Vancouver, B.C.
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Feb 12, 2009 - 01:33pm PT
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Best wishes to the dirtster!
"You don't go around injecting potentially lethal doses of drugs into patients who will otherwise recover from their injuries or illness - regardless of the fact that they are in pain. Doing so is called incompetence and you will loose your license although probably - under those circumstances - you would not go to jail."
Doing as described is more likely to be called murder, or at least manslaughter.
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Jello
Social climber
No Ut
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Feb 12, 2009 - 04:05pm PT
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PLEASE, DIRT, HANG IN THERE, AND LET'S FIGURE OUT SOME WAY TO GET TOGETHER WHEN YOU'RE FEELING BETTER. I'D LIKE TO BE SERANADED BY YOUR GUITAR AT LEAST ONE TIME.
AND OAKIE...SO SORRY TO HEAR ABOUT YOUR DAD PASSING. I KNOW HOW TOUGH IT IS.
-JEFF
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Mighty Hiker
Social climber
Vancouver, B.C.
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Feb 24, 2009 - 11:06pm PT
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Where is that rascal, anyway? I hope he's doing OK.
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Lynne Leichtfuss
Social climber
valley center, ca
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Feb 24, 2009 - 11:10pm PT
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Hi Guy, I be praying for you. I wish I could meet yo in the real. Hear you're a music man. I just wrote my first several songs. So wishin we were closer. Keep the Peace and Joy in your Soul, Curt...or is it with a K...if so, sorry. Lynnie
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RRK
Trad climber
Talladega, Al
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Feb 25, 2009 - 09:23am PT
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I talked to him this weekend he was back in the hospital and had experienced some setbacks. Apparently the tumors have spread to the liver but he really didn't know more than that at the time and I haven't heard since. He was due home Monday and I've been waiting to let things settle down before giving a call. I may give him a ring later today or else call his mom for beta. He mentioned wanting to record as soon as he gets some strength so I'll likely drive over next week, prop him up in a chair and work his equipment for him. You really need to hear his music - it's astonishing. That might be a good time to load him up in something that rolls and check out the Botanical Gardens or something like that. As we all know there's nothing like the sun on your face to make you feel like living. More beta when I hear something
RRK
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RRK
Trad climber
Talladega, Al
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Feb 25, 2009 - 05:23pm PT
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just talked to his mom and the news is not inspiring. He is definietly at the crux of his journey. Aggressive tumors are in the liver and hospice is with him now (he's asleep). According to his mom he is feeling good, eating well, walking in the yard, etc but very tired. His mom said that he's not ready "to go" yet and may take another run at it with more aggressive therapy. She said he was talking about playing his guitar so I'll definitely drive over and make him put down some tracks next week. He gets his mail at home: 1784 Shades Crest Rd., Birmingham, Al. 35216. I'll get more beta next week
RRK
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scuffy b
climber
just below the San Andreas
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Feb 25, 2009 - 06:41pm PT
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Thanks for the word.
Sniff...
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Mighty Hiker
Social climber
Vancouver, B.C.
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Feb 26, 2009 - 01:25am PT
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Thanks, RRK. I'm very sorry to hear the news. Do you know if Curt is on-line at all? Or perhaps a family member, who could pass messages on?
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neebee
Social climber
calif/texas
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Feb 26, 2009 - 01:42pm PT
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hey there all... say.... dad-gum, oh my... :( ---i missed the mail man...
i will send my card tonight...
my prayers will hold true though, i don't miss them... :)
may dirt get to enjoy his guitar... and not feel his pain...
god bless, to you dirt...
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dirtineye
Trad climber
the south
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Feb 28, 2009 - 04:52am PT
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HI, I'm answering to end a few misconceptions and that's about it.
I'm not in any real pain. I have enough ilquid diluadid on hand to do myself in if it came to that ,but I'm not interested in checking out til the better better end.
''Dilaudid and I get along very well and I don;t want to abuse teh relationship LOL< it works, doesn hot constipate of r give weirdhalucinations (l=ike I get from morphine) and I really don;t need stronger, althoug hI can easily get anything I want for pain relief. I am not in pain.
I am not afraid to die, almost did that when I had the reaction to cmeo monoclilal antobidl several yearesa ago, and death is just suprisingly not that scary, even when you KNOW it is coing asn can see and feel it happening, as in. body disconnectl ;ligkt h at endo of tunnle and aoo taht stuff you hear, well it's true, but it aint spirirual at all, and it does not hurt, It;s like a conversation with yourself reviewing your life, and agreeing to try not to die but accepting the very real possibility thtaiit is about to happen. Not jesus, no devil, no god made any appearnce I am glad to say. IT woudl be hard since they do not exist so there, that's that.
reapeat: death is not scary, but I'm really not willing or ready to go, I just hav no choice.
Both lobes of htmy liver a "full of cncer" is the lastest report. I am in hopsice, but the ocologist is workign overtime to fond a possible treatment. O do meed a miracle, but I feel that if prayer worked I'd be well by now with all the people who say htey are prayijng over the matter.
Too bad god does not exist, cause I could use the help, even from a jerk like I imagine him to be. If yo uare offended by my views on god and religion, too bad, deal with it. I do. It woudl certainnly be nice to beleive, but that is about as effective ad beleiveing in the easter bunny. It's really too bad that this life is all there is, but that IS life, so LIVE the one you GOT RIGHT NOW. That;s what I try to do, although a bit badly lately, for obvious reasons.
I really feel like wrigning this is a bit like catering to rubber neckers at a wreack on the highway, and that is about all I really am to most of you. NO offense inteneded, that's just hte way life is.
THos of you I have actually met, maybe it;as little different and I am sure many of you are sincere peopple in your depth of concern, but the reality is I am just words ona screen, not real person, although I would have lieked to meet many of you and been real friends.
maybeone or two will learn something about early detection adn warning signs from aall I ahve e=written about cancer, I really hope so, because then my time here woudl haer been well spent if just one peron could avoind what I amd going though. that would be meaningful.
I do think we all want to do something meaningful, at least I hope that's true, because I woudl rather the world not be such a cynical mecenary me me me place.
one is in life alone no matter what it seems.
take it for what it's worth.
As for climbing i was very lucky to have the rihgt mind and build for it, and to meet all the right people ant the right time. I realrely ever had a bad partner, and I count among my frineds in climbing, my good friends who I got do to probably more FAs that most givent hte number of years and time out, shannon stegg and jim Corbett amd Jeff Noffsinger, and the late great Jim Okel truly a great climber adn a great human being, and Bob COrmany, the reclusive hobbit like creature who told John sherman to get lost when sherman called about putting bob in one of his books, LOL-- don;t worry, they later bacame good pals, but what a funny story it is. Somehao again Bob and I just hit it off from first contack, nad I am prooud to say that he showed me a few of hse secret problems and I was actually able to do a few of em, and then whe nhye fould out how sick I was he went back and did em a few weeka ago a aa sort of memorial to me, whic h is touching , nad a much nicer way to be remembered that tha guy dyong from cancer. And one friend I learned a great deal from Arno,who is problaby the best climber with the fewest natural physical gifts I ever saw, who accompishes wonders based on his thinkng ability and being efficient and is truly gifted at passing what he has learned on to others. make no mistake, This is a HUGE compliment in my book. I give Arno far more credit that someohe who has a lot of natural pysical gifts.. what arno does is what we could all do if we are willing to learn. That is the highest position one can have- to realise one's full potential, and Arno definately has a good grip on how to do it himself as well as how to help others do the same.
Jeff Lowe is another climber I did get to meet, although we never got to climb togather, and I ahve to say he impressed me as a great and noble and ala round incredible human being, a pleasure to meet and talk with, and someone I wish I could have been long term friends with.
And or course htere is my pal RRK, who if I had listened to in the 70]s adn treind theis idiotic sport of climbing we'd both be long dead, becase he can't place gear as well as a retarded cockroach and at the time he first asked I was weighing 118 pounds and was fearless and stupid, prone to wreaking sports cares and walking away unhurt like a real dumbass (which I was ans still am only to a slightly lesser degree) and would have tried anything just because it was there.. RRK is the funniest man laive and you ahve tobe carfeul not to die laught when in hos presence, but if you do go climbing with him DO NOT trust his gear placements, periond, and DO NOT let him fall oh you, ans he is a big boy climber and can do considerable damage with a little help from gravity.
Jeff, about the guitar playing, you'll either haveto come visit, and you are welcome to do it, or you can try to get a copy of a cd or two that are inexistene, you might know someone hwo has one, and I'll allow you a copy. Try Mark blanchard, I beleive you might know him. I'd rahter you visit are get the new one as it will be a lot longer and better, or you could try toget the last htree years of the Fretted Instruent Cheistmans CD, whicn I am on wiht one track each year. THowe carols are pretty good, and although the arrangenemts re min the music is public doman adn the CD is normally free for the asking nad invitation only to the players, so tyeh are not bad, but or course my track is usually the best LOL, of course. Fretted Instruments is a music store in Birmingham alabama run by nasty old (but livable curmudgeley) Heb Trottman, who cant retire bacuse nobody could ru the store like he does, (famous quote: " I'll do the right thing, I may not like it but I'll do the right thing" and he always does. Everyone who like guitars and curmdgeons shouodo at least visit Fretted instruments and meet Herb, it's an experience to remember. NA you cna tease him about beinga bajo player, which is almost mandatory, ans bajo player need constant reminding of their inherent inferiority ort they don't feel right.
OK , what a long ramblind screed this turned out to be.
maybe simene laughed, maybe you found out what you wnated to knonw, and I hope I pissed of some holy rollers cause htey need it, but enough for now.
maybe I cna get back and write some more if anyone in interested adn I feel up to it.
Frankly I di not liek the ywa super topo had gone the last few years, it had gottne too big and full of too many topoics for me to keep up with.
I really do wish I could meet mighty Hiker AKA anders, and give him more crap about trip reports and hiw wimpy cat, and make no mistake, I really di like anders, I think he must be e fine fellow, who probably would not lieke a dedicated curmudegeon (that worda again, how it fits, liek a glove, TI badn I will never gaing the age needed to gain exalted grand high cretchety old cumdgeon status, alas)) like me very much, but I'll take my chances there.
And to all those guys who offe3red to do climbs if I coudl get out west , I am sorely sad that it isn't going to be possible. I would have loved to do it, and I really would have liked to struggle upthat hourglas thing wiht Tarbaby, but, that's life.
I do wihs those whi give Jennie crap woudl stop, whidh will ahve all theeffect of farting into a hurricaaane, but I'm pretty sure Jennie as a good person, who just needs to ditch the damend momons nad persue her raltioship wiht her god on her own.
And I ahve to say poor lois, doomed to be a blindered republocan dimwit, is otherwise probably fine, if a bit thick headed on almost avery thing , and truly the emily latella of ST. Etertainement value like no hter is Lois, if yo ucan bear the frustration. I still feel pain for poor Karl over the Loising point.
Ack, it got even longer and more rambling.
Oh well, jsut remember, I am calvin, of calvin and hobbes, just bigger and older, with out that tiger. sand more complicated, unfortunately.
Don;t strain your brain worring overme, i'm not worth it. But I do make a fine cartoon character, if you know hte whole story.
UNfortuantely I can;t blame this oddddddd thinc called dirtinieye on drugged behavior, I'd be even worse without hte drugs, I make no exuses and no appologies, I come as I am, take it or leave it, but generally unless you are a hard core right wing nit republican I and harmeless.
I hopw you are aas thouroughly confused now as I am, which was not my intent, but somehow it workes out htat way most of the time.
Have a nice life, in fact, try tro make your life nice, that's my parting advice, because if you don't nobody else will.
Ind Fish still smells. bastard never did answer my questions about his gear, whic as ti turend out I never woudl hae used anyway, whihc is sad, cause I bet some if ot is pretty good, and If I were well I'd bend over and by the double rope bag even though the guy is a jerk, so there. yet another curmudgen, nad we soert of have to stsick togeter admiiting it as litle as possible, as it were.
Yeates gear is better, and he was nice to me, so Nyah. hah. Shameless plug for bets harness ever yates shield, nad here to the yeats three aider system, nad his wall ladders. my they never twist and talnge, wihch they don't ine are now the property of Shannon stegg, along with allmy other good gear, including the famous TI pins, which will dpoubltless be stolen but cluesll f*#king idiots, of which htere seem to be an unending supply coimging into climbing from gymes nad sprot areas every day.
A hearty hurrah for all adventureclimbers everywhere who don;t geive a fukc about hte guid bookds or being inone, even though they tend to wind up there. YOu are tghe heart of climbing.
A pos on healy J for not fininshing the stupid be all end all hammer of doom beifer I die, so I could actually use one at least once, even though my specialty was alwasy to trcik the other duy into doint hte nailing and drilling. I still wanted that stupid hammer. Just in case thereis an after life, womoen let me know if the theing is orgasmic to swing, that is if they ever do come into existance.
Anyway, I'm aboout dead for real. So sorry to dissapoing all those whit thought i was faking, LOL. I wish htat were so. I'd rather be a lying manipulative scumbag that dead, given the coulce, but, I'm not nad I'm not.
YOu'll just have to find womeone else to think your stupid thoughts about.
Poor HK, please don;t driver yourslf nuts. dearst G gordon Liddy,aka Pito ron, yeah, you suck, but problably not taht bad, we actually could be friends if you could stand me out shooting you with ease. Would live to have had hte chance to demonstrate. DHooting is fun, and most people who shoot are reasonably decnet folk I;ve found. hey that includes you! I still don;t see you you reaiseds such ire in some ofhte denizens of ST, I thought they were unduly harsh to you at leasst a few times, but, that;s the interenst and people. so f*#k em.
If I elfet anoyon out, I'm sorry.
Sctually there's a good chance that if I left you out it cause I really didn;t ahve anyting good to say so you're better off.
There's also a chance that I left out people I pretty much loiekd as much as you can like someone from internet only conteact , so I'm sorry for that. THe truth is I really try to like most people, and usually succeed in person, . though you'd never guess from how I post on teh internet.
Oh well, nobody's perfect.
Good bye.
Oh yeah, beare gossip. it rarely is true and usually leasds to wrong conclusions. BUt peopel do love it. Go figure.
Bye forreal now.
Of course I was goingto call mine (Healy J hammer) Molinjar. I guess I tend to think of myself as some sort of god after all LOL.
OOPS specoal poke at Jim ewing , for never making the magic doubles that hold tons of falls, give a soft catch and wont; cut. I really wanted those ropes dude. Shame on you.
Special thanks ro Rgold for all the really good math explanations of climbing stuff, once upon a time pre cheom I was an up and coming mathenmatician, but chemo and a bad choce adn anti depressanted ended tath. Ling live PDE and all that new stuff with fraectals and strange attactors and fractional exponents, I could have lived that stuff if only I'd made a few beter choices. At least I got to hang with a few real world class mathenaticians thanke to a department head who had more faith im me that I deserved. It's wild to be surroudned by guys who were the first to do soehing ina field, to discover new ideas in varousl aspects of math, wow. Glad I at least got to be there for a bit.
OK, REALLY bye now.
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healyje
Trad climber
Portland, Oregon
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Feb 28, 2009 - 05:10am PT
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Damn, Dirt, sorry we didn't get to meet - I would have liked that as one sandstone curmudgeon to another. Yeah, the damn hammer thing has been moving at a glacial pace - but it is still creeping along - finally have the real handle factory now and will be having Ajax requote the heads shortly. Have to say, though, I'd feel guilty about arming you for the voyage into the great unknown given you're already dangerous.
Where is this hospice you're at...?
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Hardman Knott
Gym climber
Muir Woods National Monument, Mill Valley, Ca
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Feb 28, 2009 - 05:13am PT
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Curt - I will always drive myself nuts - it's the only way I know.
As one Creepy Old Guy™ to another - you better knott die just yet you bastard,
because you will be missed very much - whether you believe it or knott.
I've always respected you, although I disagreed with much of your bombastic prose.
Hang in there, bro - there are still plenty of naive nubiles to terrorize!
David Buchanan
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Blowboarder
Boulder climber
Back in the mix
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Feb 28, 2009 - 05:44am PT
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Curt, reading that was hard man, really hard. Shame you never made it out to the PNW, I had a route picked out we could go FA and call Revenge of The Clown Suit or some equally silly sh#t.
Not much for prayers but you're in my thoughts.
Cheers,
Pasha
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darod
Big Wall climber
South Side Billburg
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Feb 28, 2009 - 09:58am PT
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Dirt, thanks for the post. Brutal honesty doesn't come any better than that.
Rubbernecker i might be, who gives a sh#t.
I wish you peace.
darod.
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noshoesnoshirt
climber
dangling off a wind turbine in a town near you
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Feb 28, 2009 - 10:03am PT
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You seem to be strong.
As Robinson Jeffers said, he would rather drink life to the bitter dregs than end it willingly.
Fight the good fight, there is always hope.
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hossjulia
Trad climber
Eastside
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Feb 28, 2009 - 10:11am PT
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ditto darod, I felt privileged to be able to read this post.
Curmudgeons are worth listening to, they speak from experience.
Thanks Dirt, and have a good one, OK?
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survival
Big Wall climber
A Token of My Extreme
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Feb 28, 2009 - 10:58am PT
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Thanks dirt, it's not often that you get to read something like a friend letter/manifesto.
I don't want to call it a final goodbye, but I guess in truth, it might not be far from it. I'm glad you're not in pain. It is weird to see the drug waivering your consciousness, or at least your care in typing, because I can see it move back and forth.
It was readable none the less.
Thank you.
Bruce Birchell
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Dick_Lugar
Trad climber
Indiana (the other Mideast)
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Feb 28, 2009 - 12:54pm PT
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Hey Dirt,
I really enjoyed your letter above. You may have just been words on the computer screen, but we all have gotten to know you through your brute honesty and entertaining personality. We all know there's a real person behind the words dealing with a real disease. The greatest gift you've given to me is to remind me that we are all mortal and as you say "Live life NOW". Thank you for that gift. Your attitude and courage facing bleak odds is both inspirational and humbling. I'm glad you're not in much pain and hope the rest of your journey is pain free and peaceful.
Frank
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dirtineye
Trad climber
the south
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Feb 28, 2009 - 01:00pm PT
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this stuff is making me cry.
thank goodness that one person did benefit from this, good luck with the scope. I'm a little happier for that.
I really did love climbing I hat e to leave it.
gotta go
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Jello
Social climber
No Ut
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Feb 28, 2009 - 01:03pm PT
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Damn, Dirt, you've got me laughing and crying, thinking and sighing, cursing and praying (in my own fashion - for you), all at the same time. The Curt shines through the Dirt! You, my friend, are the proverbial one-of-a-kind (thank the God that doesn't exist). Thanks for the tips on obtaining some of your tune-magic; I'll follow through. But, I'd really like to see you before you go. If RRK or someone could meet me at the airport with a wheelchair and chauffeur me to and from the place where you are, I'd love to come out and hang for a bit with you. Pass a little time, as it were, since we both have so much of it...hehehe (of course, in truth, none of us has very much time in this life).
RRK, can you help me out, or help me find someone who can?
-Jeff
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Jaybro
Social climber
wuz real!
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Feb 28, 2009 - 01:10pm PT
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That was as poignant as it gets, Dirtman!
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Dropline
Mountain climber
Somewhere Up There
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Feb 28, 2009 - 01:15pm PT
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Curt, maybe not just one person will benefit from your experience and words.
A friend and I have been working on a new business idea that's essentially about informing people of the heretofore unpublicized risks of many products that are legally on the market. It's a color coded product awareness system that would help consumers make quick informed decisions about the risk level of products when in the grocery store, hardware store, garden center, or wherever.
We don't yet know if we can get the idea to fly or not, but a major motivation is our desire to help people reduce their risk of cancer, and your story adds a lot of fuel to that fire.
Thanks for the inspiration.
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dirtbag
climber
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Feb 28, 2009 - 01:21pm PT
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Wishing the best for you, Other Dirt. I hope things work out as best they can.
If this is goodbye, know that we will miss you and think fondly of you.
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Ed Hartouni
Trad climber
Livermore, CA
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Feb 28, 2009 - 01:33pm PT
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I'll morn you when you actually check out, Dirtineye... until then, I count on you to give me a bit of hell...
I will wish you good luck with the current crisis. Sounds like that's what it will take.
Keeping it real for us, in your own distinct style.
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RRK
Trad climber
Talladega, Al
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Feb 28, 2009 - 01:35pm PT
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Jello - can do - make your travel plans and I'll make the catch. Huel Love Jr., PO Box 1079 Talladega, Al 35161 (256) 761-1863 hueljr@bellsouth.net
I'll get back with you in a second - I've got dirt on the phone trying to educate me on his guitars
rrk
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nature
climber
Tucson, AZ
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Feb 28, 2009 - 01:42pm PT
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Hmmm.... this inspires me to go brew some coffee.
Locker, want seconds? ;-)
seriously though... keep those pipes clean.
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Jello
Social climber
No Ut
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Feb 28, 2009 - 01:43pm PT
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Cool, Huel! My daughter's here for the weekend, so it'll probably be Monday or Tuesday, or soonest I can get a cheap flight. Check your e-mail a bit later.
-Jello
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RRK
Trad climber
Talladega, Al
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Feb 28, 2009 - 01:56pm PT
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I've got Wednesday blocked off to go over early and stay late being dirt's sound engineer but anytime is ok
Kenny
back now from my 1-900-EATDIRT "dirt-lesson" both older and wiser (today's subjects were wide-ranging, from guitars to Republicans). I would disagree with Dirt's assertion earlier in this thread that nothing lies beyond this life. I may have said this before. Much of what we do not understand can be explained in terms of our observation of natural processes which we do understand. My model for whatever lies beyond is based upon the life cyle of the butterfly (or as much of it as we know). Does the caterpillar know that it will become a butterfly? The fact is that when the metamorphasis occurs the life that was the caterpillar is gone, yet the life that was in the caterpillar lives on as the butterfly. Our own "metamorphasis" may follow a similar path and yet be as uknown to us as the butterfly is to the caterpillar.
If the Bhuddists are on the right track then I predict Dirt's return as a fire ant. (That ought be good for a dirty rant)
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dirtineye
Trad climber
the south
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Feb 28, 2009 - 02:34pm PT
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sounds like this is going to happen and that will be great. it seems we are both on really short time, we'd better go as soon as possible. there's a wheelchair here and a nice bed too come on down fast.
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Jaybro
Social climber
wuz real!
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Feb 28, 2009 - 02:39pm PT
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You guys are too much! What a thing to make into an opportunity!
Now there's something we should all learn from!
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Todd Gordon
Trad climber
Joshua Tree, Cal
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Feb 28, 2009 - 02:47pm PT
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Senior Dirtineye;...never had the pleasure to meet you , but climbed with some of your gear that justhemaid has of yours...(She probably stole it;...she's part gypsy I believe).....so hang tough, get out the Michael Phelps bong with Jeff Lowe, and keep the party going.....we'll keep your climbing spirit alive here in So. Cal whenever we use your gear....we shall do you up proud.......Here is a FA we did (My Penis Floats 5.11a/b...FA T. Gordon, Tucker Tech, Mister E, Robert Fonda, and justhemaid) at Joshua Tree, using your gear for our anchor....thanks....you rock....
Rouge, vagabon, peri-winkle pated woman, and a gear thief.....I believe you know this ruffian.....
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Ottawa Doug
Social climber
Ottawa, Canada
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Feb 28, 2009 - 03:07pm PT
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Hey Mr. Dirt,
Wishing you peace even though I'm one of the people here you don't know. I've read enjoyed many of your posts. You've got a ton of real friends on this site. Take strength from them and I hope you and Jello have fun this week.
Cheers,
Doug
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Jello
Social climber
No Ut
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Feb 28, 2009 - 03:11pm PT
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Where do I fly into?
-CluelessJello
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Fletcher
Trad climber
here to eternity
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Feb 28, 2009 - 03:38pm PT
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Hey Dirt,
Rubberneckers don't stop, offer genuine good wishes and other things, and sign their real names. This is is different place than you get to with an in person relationship, but amongst all the ones and zeros, a slice of who you are does come through. And people have seen that and responded to it in one way or another (it may even be a silent response). If there wasn't a relationship of some kind that had some value, I don't think you'd ever get any responses, healthy, sick or whatever else.
You're the real deal, the good, the bad and the ugly, but in the end, to paraphrase John Cage, it's all beautiful.
You have taught others at least two things here (probably a heck of a lot more):
1. Get that colonoscopy when around 50! Duh.
2. A little bit about dying and accepting and embracing it. I'd be hard pressed to say much of anything is absolute, but humans and death are inseparable. We can deny the heck out of it, but we got to deal with it sooner or later. And I think the later the more difficult it can be to work with. I think you've done a good thing with being honest about your feelings regarding that.
Todd's post about the FA with your stolen gear is the best. That's love.
Keep up the piss and vinegar as long as you want. You already know when it'll be the time to go. In the meantime, we're still appreciating and enjoying you.
Peace bro'
Eric
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rgold
Trad climber
Poughkeepsie, NY
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Feb 28, 2009 - 04:14pm PT
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Dirt,
Space-time is a four-dimensional manifold, an infinitesimal slice of the Hilbert Space of eternity. Who knows whether and where we will all end up, and who knows whether our time is today, tomorrow, or not for years to come?
Far be it for me to pretend to find silver linings in a journey's end, and yet, having experienced the deaths of my parents, very different types of deaths, I feel that there is a certain privilege in being able, at the end of a hard day, to look back at the adventure you've had, the wrong turns and the right ones, the friends made and lost, the things you got away with, and the things you didn't, and see yourself, as you approach the trailhead, exhausted from your efforts, yet even so excited by the experience, in the context of a whole life, with its web of connections, it's successes and failures, its satisfactions and regrets.
For it is not given to all of us to pause at a high point at the end of the trail and survey the route taken, and although you, and all of us I'm sure, would wish for another day and yet another new path to try, you still have the blessing of that final vista. May you draw a deep and satisfied breath, and may you share the wisdom and emotion conferred by such a perspective with good friends and loved ones.
We'll be thinking of you Dirt, and we will remember.
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RRK
Trad climber
Talladega, Al
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Feb 28, 2009 - 04:35pm PT
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Jello
Birmingham has an airport but it doesn't fly direct to anywhere (except maybe New Orleans and possibly Hell) Connecting through to Bham would be the most convenient to Dirt. If you can't get a budget connection through Hotlanta or Dallas (seems like the last time I flew back from Moab it was through Cincinnati?) I can drive over and get you in Atlanta. It's about a 2 hour trip by car so, from your perspective it would probably be worth a few extra bucks to get a connection to Bham. Any way that works for you is ok.
RRK
PS I'll have to schedule around a day next week to go to Bham for my son's EEG. It just came up today and I won't know exactly when till Monday. Make plans regardless because I'm great at multitasking and I won't drop you.
RRK
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Jaybro
Social climber
wuz real!
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Feb 28, 2009 - 04:51pm PT
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Dirtbro, Like my sister, I've been out planting seeds.. Call me Johhny Ca Poppy, seed. From my POV id rather you were able to come see them, or my photos of them. But, we work with the way it is. Hopefully we can compare notes some time, but in any case we already have... thank you for all of it!
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dirtbag
climber
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Feb 28, 2009 - 05:15pm PT
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That's very sweet Lois.
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Mighty Hiker
Social climber
Vancouver, B.C.
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Feb 28, 2009 - 07:59pm PT
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I'm very sorry to hear Curt's sad news, and can only send him my best wishes. He sets a high standard for the rest of us.
I've never been to the southeast U.S., but once or twice thought it would be good to visit Curt, meet him in person, and have an adventure or two together. And then post a TR about it here, to his consternation. Perhaps it is not to be.
Yes, I admit that next to Kittimus, Loki is probably a bit of a pu**y. So you got me there. But although I am not a believer, the thought of your haunting LEB in her garden is a bit amusing.
I had a screening colonscopy, and recommend them - fun for the whole family. There are two good articles at:
http://www.nytimes.com/2009/02/24/health/esn-colonoscopy-expert.html?_r=1&scp=1&sq=colonoscopy&st=cse
http://www.nytimes.com/2008/12/16/health/16cancer.html?scp=6&sq=colonoscopy&st=cse
Wherever you're bound next, Curt, I hope the voyage is one with fair skies and peaceful waters.
Anders
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Jello
Social climber
No Ut
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Feb 28, 2009 - 08:51pm PT
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Kenny- Got the flight. Check your e-mail for details. Basically, I'll be able to spend all day Wednesday with Curt, and some time with you, too, I hope?
-Jello
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Jaybro
Social climber
wuz real!
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Feb 28, 2009 - 09:05pm PT
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"But although I am not a believer," -you me, the dirtman and others, Anders, "the thought of your haunting LEB in her garden is a bit amusing." I'll presume to speak for Lois, and say I think we ALL, like that idea!
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Karl Baba
Trad climber
Yosemite, Ca
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Feb 28, 2009 - 09:42pm PT
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Bon Voyage my friend
I'm sure it will be a relief when it turns out you were mistaken in our ongoing discussions about the reality of the afterlife. Finally a win-win situation, you either get to be right or you get to live forever in one form or another.
The problem is figuring out how you can haunt us just enough to admit it! Make LEBs animals bark a lot at 4am?
In whatever case, I wish you the best state of Being each moment from this moment forward.
I'll be offering some prayers in a special temple here in India today, just to piss you off and get the last word. :-)
Much Love
Karl
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Lynne Leichtfuss
Social climber
valley center, ca
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Feb 28, 2009 - 09:53pm PT
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And I as well continue to offer prayers for you ..... Lynne
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Karl Baba
Trad climber
Yosemite, Ca
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Feb 28, 2009 - 11:12pm PT
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LEB
"Actually, Karl, sometimes animals can sense spirits more readily than people can."
I know, that's why having Dirt get your beasts to torment you seemed like a perfect plan to keep in touch with Dirt!
;-)
Karl
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dirtineye
Trad climber
the south
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Well, let's assusme for a moment that the IS an afterlife, and I will ahve some ability to affect evets in this ( your ongoing) existence.
First, sorry guys, I will not be tormenting Lois.
HOWEVER, "ve haf vays..."
Neeldess to say, some of you will ahve to give up climbing, bacuase your gear win NEVER stay put again. everything will go wrong for you in climbing. YOU know who you are.
I guess I am a bit of a grudge holder and a little man at taht sometimes, hahaha.
Others of you will find that you cannot fail. YOU probably know who you are too.
Still ohters will fall in between,-- those who obvious need a a little fvcking with but nothign dangerous or mean.
To tell the trugth I'll just have to wait ans see just how much I can do. It will be a new experience, being in some ways all powerful ofer the lives of others, haha, of course, with my budding god comples, I'm sure I will rise to the occaseion...
Hmmm are you really sure you want there to be an after life for me? It could be very bad you see...
A deram to some, A nightmare to others!!! muaahahahahahah! I love that line from Ron Moody ans merlin in King Atrhur, LOL. IT sumes um one of my self imageins when I'm in a waeker moment.
I try to be good, really I do. In fact, most of my life i was way too nice, alwasy getting my feelings hurt trying to be nice to people. I wans not ready for the real world and mean people.
Orf course I changes when I got on the inmnternet adn people were typcail xavage. I decided it was time to stop turning the other cheek and fight fire with nuclear holocauset on those whom i deem unworthy, that is,as#@&%es, whe were mean to me or others for no good reasn, and I am prefectly compfrotable deciding who is wo in thpose situation (there's that god complex thing again)
SOrry if this is a bit offenseinve to some, hey you asked I'm telling, got no reason to lie at this point, and I'd prefer to hadn it out face up no doubt whateoever no conjecture needed as to waht I "mean" as a math backgrounded artist, I likte to tell it like it is, with a little flair LOL, so, deal with the unvarnishsed Curt, adn like it of don;t like it.
SOme iof this os for entertainment, some I hopeeducational ( ugh) and most will just fall on deaf ears, but 9sn;t that always the case?
No matter, I leave it to you as a gift, call it shyte or shilola, depending on our needs. My needs are met, adn almost nonexistent now, haha, can't touch me!
there is a freedom in death.
I can say waht I want. I can insult py dear parents and my family friensdd who are blind follower republicans and they have to listen, LOL, and I face no consequences for being "rude" LOL (telling the truth is rude you know, don't do it too much, people don;t like it).
Hmmm maybe thert wil lbe consequences if hte afterlife for my actioins? I'm not sure about that. Porobably there should be. I don;t liek the idea of any exietence where one might be able to just act without conciene3ce and pay no pirce for it.
I think I will mostly try to behave, except for those few people who REALLY deserve, well a lot of shyte to drop on thier head.
Like republicand rightwingnuts wo ahve raped the counry and failed to serve teh people instead serving Buisness at all costs. haha. THEY will Suffer if I ahve any say in it.
BUt back to Lois. Yes lois I got the book, nad it was very nice of you to send it, except you sent a book of NORTHERN wild floweres, and I live in theSOUTH! LOL, so it is pretty muc useless to me, but still it's the thoughtthat counts and I thank you for it.
I can;t tell you what to plant, I like most flowers, flower was in fact my fisrt word ever spoken ( see, I'm terminally nice, can;t help it, born that way) JUst don;t plant spider lilies, I don't like those LOL. anything wild is good, I muhc prefere wild floweres to culitvated, although I do like oriental and asine lillies and roses. My al time favorite wild flower common woudl be wild iris, and there are two here, the tennessee being blue nad the more southern one being purple. they are small and delicate, not liek the cultivated ones.
I do lie (exotic all lady slippers, and some of those grow up norht adn well asn in the south, but you really can;t just grow them without a LOT of effort and care, and they are prone to die out in captivity. so probably don;t try em.
Again if it comes out of the wods or just comes up natureally on your property, that is great, I'll like that even more, Voluteers are cool. I did dig up a wild hyacinth and the are very nice, the bulba re deep though so dig very deep if you find any and be sure to give em the same condition you dug em from, or they will just die too. that's the trick with transplanting wild floweres, you gotta give what they want. some are like weeds though and some aree pickey. if you wish you honor me, you'll need to get some picky ones, LOL, cause after all, I am picky. sadyl, one of my (very few and minor of course) character flaws.
LOL man I am glad god does not throw lighting bolts any more, Ithink I just earned one.
Mock GOd: this will be important. I think if there is an afterlife then there robably would be a hierarcyn adh teh top guy would call himself god. a bit pretentios don;t you think? I will do my best to annoy him, which is alwo how I will wind up ruling Hell shoudl it exist. I will just annoy satan to teh pont where he givesup. I cna be very annoying when i want to. It comes naturalyy, and can be a great asset, at least sometimes. Other times, not so hot, to annoy people without meaning too, which I really don;t want to do.
If I intend to annoy I want it ti be very straight forawrd and unmistakeable, LOL, which is as it should be. but really, usually such activity is a collossal waste of time and effort and not worth dpoing, so I keep it to a minimum, like the use of nukes. dangerous and not for daily use, you know? probably for the best.
Better to be nice when you can, and even when you can't. works better. It's really easy to be nice in fact, more peopel should try it.
Boy am I ever rambling again.
I hope this is not boring, that is a great crime in writing-- to bore the audience. I'm just shocked that I have any audience, LOL.
Sspeaking of audeince, I should clear one thing up: JTM ( SKIP) did NOT stal my rack. that was a bad joke by todd GOrdon, not meant to be bad, but as you woudol expect a few people had to ask if shereallystole my rack, and the anser is , NO, I gave it to her, but she tok the wrong stuff as well, and then I asleked for most of it bafk cause I was supposed to get better anyeay, ( too bad that was WRONG) and I would up getting the aid stuff nad all the reast to Steg, who will use it hte way I intended, which is FA FA FA, adventure climbing, leading new thijngs, whihc unfortuhnately the rather wimpy ( just the truth, hno animosity ) maid will NEVER do, casye well, she don;t lead anything new or hard, and in fact prefers to clea nda follow, which she is very very good at BTW.
It's funny how someone can fly up a climb like a rocket in top belay but aske them to lead the same climb and they piss in thier boots. LOL. Adventure and leading is not for everyone I guess.
But again, the maid stole nothing, I told her to keep the camelots nad tcus, ( but not being too bright she accientally sent one camelot back and kept some things she was supposed to return, poor thing, she ReALLY can be dense sometimes, but I love her anyway)
The only thihg she stole was my heart. It's funny, we have so many thing in common, including physical things, we have the same feet, so my custom made mekan climbing shoes htat I cna no lionger use fit her prefrectly which is good cause she ahs a lot of trouble getting shoes that fit right, so I told her to keep those along with the camelots and tcus, whihc is a pretty damed good bunch of stuff to have given to you after all. and I'm glad she has em, cause she loves climbing so much
hell treat anyone you are involved with right, put their needs before your own, and be a good partner. OR you'll just f*#k up. that's my advice on relationships for everyone in fact, and it's good. Took me forever toget it right, adn in the end, evne that was not enough, but I still did the right thing, and I can live with it.
Too bad I got sick, but that's life, adn it might have faield anyway, best laid plans and all that, but you takes your chances adn lives your life, and takes what you get, and make the best of it, and that's all you can do, except it really helps to try to do teh right thing, and deep down I think most of us know that that is.
we make mistakes, but we can try to correct em, and that's abotu all there is. try to be happy and try to help others be happy. not a bad idea is it?
Oh well, goddammnit I really did not want to do a " here's what iV;e learned as I die, it's good and worth hearing and maybe it will help you," but it f*#king happend anyway.
I hope it's not too off base. again, maybe it will help someone. and that would be nice.
I'm no philosopher, I'm a math/art guy. strange combo. indeed. give me facts, make sense, but make it beautiful. tell teh truth. truth matters. bullshit is bad. call it what it is. Don;t suffer idiots, but try to help em not be idiots. LOL.
Ge I'm just full of cliche'd aphoristic nonsense today. I hate that.
Be real. be real be real. Live. Do. DOn't sit around-- make things happen, nobody wlse will. YOU are in charge of your own happiness.
Death hads it's bad side, it's comng too soon for me, but it has good points too. it will be a relief. it is not scary, what is scary is not getting done what I need to get done before I go. I will miss skip. I will miss emails with Jennie. I will mess meeting new people. I will miss creating the hundreds on new tuens that would have happened and are now going to die with me, never to be heard. that's sad. Turns out I had a realttalent for writning mustic, enough to revolutionize the clasical guitar body 9f work in fact. LOL the greatest classical guitar maker in in the world is my biggest fan, he calls me every few days to talk. that's an honor I NEVER expected. I just backed into it. but it had given me great hope and added meaning to my life and I am glad for it.
In fact, in climbing too I led a charmed life, always meeting just who was right at the right time, hitting it off with them every time. Made more good friends in climbing than in anything else I ever did, how odd.
How odd to meet perfect strangers and just blend with them like we'd known each other all ourt lives. and get along so well. it's scary good. makes no sense. real life , is it really like that? it was for me I guess. TO bad it';s almost over, jsut when I'mgetting it right.
Let THAT be a lseeon for you, get it right soon, so oucan enjoy it , LOL. DOn;t waste your time, it's all you got.
Enough for now.
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Double D
climber
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Best wishes for you dirt. My prayers go out to you.
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dirtineye
Trad climber
the south
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Lois I would have planted tulip poplars over pine any day. if they wil grow there you should get some. most beautiful tree ever, wild, flowering, grat shape, good wood nice leaf, nothing to dislike about em ever.
coreopsis are nice.
snowberry coriopsis is very cool, we planted some this past year.
we are about to order bees ( I probably wont see the honey but I hope th see theeffect on the garden and fruit tree production, htat is the main reason for getting them-- all our wild ones are gone.
just abotu to start the volkov tomatoes, as usual, I am a bit late, but this illness has done that for me every year, so nothing new.
it's good to stagger a crop anyway.
I totally reccommend Vokov tomatoes, best heirloom I've found, with cherokee purple second bes.
chreokee have a great ptoperty-- planted late, havested green forthe winter,they still almost all ripen to a good texture and flavor, which is unusual. so if you grwo some cher0kee when it's time for tomato doom ( frost) just pikc em ALL even hte small ones, and you'lll have good tomates a while longer as they ripen. it's total luck i found htis out, but this year I'll do it on purpose if I am alive, and maybe my dad will take it over anywya.
also going to try some bakc crim.
giving up on cherries, never found one wihta good enough flavor to jsut9fy the space compared to a volkov or other good large tomato.
but hte bkac chreeise were fun. beware the heirloom Large Red CHerry, LOL thre of them wiill TAKE OVER!! you better like em caouse you'll have a cherry tomato jumgle and more fruit that you could ever reat off three plants. f*#king amazing wihs othyertomatoes grew and produced like that.
Oh seemslikeI owe Jabro a word of thanks and yes I'd love to see you pics-- unless things really change for the better( and it looks like a one way downhill ride from here more and more unfortunately) I will not be comong west again.or anywhere else.
thanks again to all who made teh offer tough, and in better circumstances I woudl certainly taeke advantage of em all.
Now as for how I will 'deal with Lois in hte after life, hmmm like i said not the tormen so many of you wihs for, she really does not deserve that, but I'm working on soemthign fitting.
I suspect somehow I could force her t0 confront the vagaries of her precious republicans, that would b3 the best, and have her actually realize whena a fin job of screwing this country up they have done, ahad then she'll be ashamed for suppprothging those nimrods, and becme a good democrat, who of course aer not at all blameles, just not quite as culpable as their feckless heedless republican scum counterparts.
HEy Lois riddle me this: how is it that under the partey that forthitry years claims they are for small gov and fiscal responsibility raises the deficit TRILLIONS of dollars enehver they have hte white hose, and the democrats who are supposed to be the smpend hogs alwasy have to fix things>
'support the bush incresase by the fiscally resonsible rethugs (NO(T) from 4 trillion to twelve trillion, if you dare. LOL you cant answer satifactorially, dont 3ven try, it woudl be embarrassing, and it's all ON YOU DAMNED RETHUGS. AS IS THE 4 TRILL FROM REAGAN BUSH, AND REMEMBER THEY STARTED WITH 951 BIL LEFT FROM POOR OLD CARTER.
WHo actually had the right energy policey, and we'd be so much better off in onlly thet MORON Ronald reagan had not totally dismantled the cater enery policy the dya he took office. alwas the retugs. they only mean to serve business, LOL. f*#king idiots.
YOu'll see In the afterlife I will make you see, yor make you miserable trying LOL.
God I am going to LOVE tormenting rethugicalns with the truth, it will be so much fun.
a few may actually see the light.
But for now, just remember, even though history is bsically the soty of Business screwing peopoe every chance they get, business can do no wrong, and will never do anythign to harm the customer, cause htat's bad business!!! LOL how false a notion is that?
EVERY TIME, look it up. see the gildee age for example.
see what food was liie pre FDA.
there another one to work on: all regulation is bad, business does nto need regulation. .NO we nneed MORE salmonessla in out peanut butter -- there are too many peaaanut butter eaters clooging up te system who must die in the name of profit!!
Fvcking morin rethugs, LOL.
did yo uknow htat under bush the LWBOR department, the defender of the worker, wasw changed so thayt their goal was to SERVERTHE INTERSSTS OF BUSINESS??? it's a FACT, you can look it up!!
F*#king rretugs anst a two class suystem-- ruliing class ansd serfs, LOL.
read about saipan, us protectorate that the retugs conside the ultimate good deal for hoe it should be.
go read about what WE allowed there. it iwll make you sick sick sick. ahd YOU retugs supported it, to the hilt..
you ahve to live with that.
LOL. IDOT rethuglicans, the list goes on and on.
you are responsible for ruining oour goverment and our country, morons.
jsut try getting this in your stupid little head:
GOverment shoudl serve the PEOPLE, NOT BUISNESS. PERIOD.
Got that? GOVermnet is there to SERVE THE PEOPLE.
so simple so true, hoe is it that the rethugs got it turned on it's head? server the rich, serve business, screw teh people. nice motoe I guess.
F*#king rethugpicans all should die. make hte world a better -lace tomorrow if htey did. LOL.
end rant.
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Jaybro
Social climber
wuz real!
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So, forty odd years ago I'm standing in the family room of the family house in Park Forest Ill, when the cat jumps up onto the arm of the couch, arches her back and hisses.
"She's just seeing a spirit she doesn't like. Cats are psychic, they do that," said my friend.
Cats mess with you as much as they show affection. a perfect medium for Dirtineye communication, that and computer gremlins.
My California poppies have not come up yet, but with the rain we've had it could be any time.
Dirt, if your situation changes (if you're as tenacious as you have been, in other words) we should climb 'Here's Mud in your Eye,' in Vedauwoo, together, I'm inviting myself on the houfglass trip, as well.
ps Lois, I predict Ponderosas won't make it back east, (too low, too much moisture, wrong soil) stick with Austrian Black Pines, they grow everywhere.
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Redwreck
Social climber
Los Angeles, CA
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Dirt, I'm going to miss you. I don't think we've ever interacted here -- I'm mostly a lurker -- but to me you're one of the people who makes this site worth reading. You're smart and funny passionate and give good rant, and I appreciate that. So take care, man, and keep afflicting the comfortable as long as you're able.
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RRK
Trad climber
Talladega, Al
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way I read that post Ol' Dirt's gonna make sure that my gear falls out every time I start up from now on (SO??). Hmmm - and to think that I'd almost given up hope of ever appearing in ANAM. Maybe I could cash in as a climber-exorcist:(e.g.)
"Terrified Climber: "Dude - I don't know what happened up there. It's like we're haunted or something. All the gear fell out --bolts too!!
RRK: Dude you ARE haunted. It's the ghost of Dirtineye. Apparently you have pissed off the evil spirit. Tell you what - for a couple of those SNPA's and that shiny new red Camalot I can have a word with him for you???"
CHA CHING. Dirt you gotta work with me on this one.
RRK
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Richard
climber
Bend, OR.
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I never interacted with ya Dirt.
But you remind me of a habaneo pepper in salsa. At first it stings and burns....but then you get the flavor and want more!!
keep your chin up!!!
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Zander
Trad climber
Berkeley
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Hey Dirt,
My dad always used to say to me "You have got to be straight with me." That was his definition of a good person, someone who was "straight", was honest with themselves and others, who saw the world clearly the was it is, not the way they wanted it to be. So that's how I was raised and I've tried to be that, with mixed succcess. Dirt, you are a "straight" guy in all senses of the word. I've always appreciated that about you. It's rare and I thank you for it.
But if you think you are off the frickin" hook for coming out here and doing some FAs with us!, think again buddy. We are still waiting and the lack of Healje's hammer ain't going to cut it as an excuse. I'm sorting the rack now.
Zander
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dirtineye
Trad climber
the south
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the greatest living clasical guitar maker, and the best ever in the usa and probably the world for me adn a lot of others too, is John Gilbert, followed by his son Bill, who is making even better guitars.
But john pioneered methods that revolutionized the craft, not to mention that almost everyone who's anyone in Classical world has owned one or still does, sometimes more than one.
those who part with them usually wish they had not, LOL.
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Dick_Lugar
Trad climber
Indiana (the other Mideast)
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Thx. Curt, next time I take a classical guitar lesson, I'll drop their names and score big points with Sulai! The other guitar maker who Sulai liked was the now deceased Miguel Rodriguiz of Cordoba, Spain. Here's a link to some other audio/video clips from Sulai's website if you get bored enough...check out "Sunburst" and "Encore".
http://guitarbloomington.com/sulaiman%20zai%20video.htm
Frank
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healyje
Trad climber
Portland, Oregon
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RRK (or Dirt) - where exactly is Dirt?
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Jaybro
Social climber
wuz real!
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Plant what works Sis, just so Curt can smell the Vanilla! Though, I think he is more of a 'Rocky Road' kinda guy...
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Jaybro
Social climber
wuz real!
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you could plant a bhoddi tree, for me. We could All be part of it...
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dirtineye
Trad climber
the south
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Dick,
Dirt curt is currently in birmingham alabama.
but soon to be, well, EVERYWHERE!!! ROTFLMAO!
Lois, byall means, plant the tulip poplars. plant several though and give em ROOM, the can get really big really fast, and eventually then can be many feet in daim, although not in your remaining lifetime.
there is one that is 300 years old in one ofthe national forests here.
they change so much once the get to be 3 or mroe feet in diam, yo ualmost don't recognize tehm, cause teh bark charactdr really changes
at about 10 to twelve years old, they start blooming, and for most of thier life nad an incredible shape. they remind me of the trees theelves live in in tolein's books.
grey smoothish bark with a little wrinkle to it, long slender drooping branches with a very nice curavture, adn never so big they would harm your hose if one fell on it, unlike some trees such as the chdsthun oak, where a branch can be as big as a tree and do a ton of damage when it falls.
plant the coreopsis too, but I prefer snowberry coriopsis to the others, it is the most striking and I thin you woudl reaoly enjoy it. plus it us damned cheap for such a nice looking perenial flower.
Now about these demands that I come west and climb, well ,OK, just do your part.. HAHA, that means, find a cure or a miracle for me, and I'll be on teh next plane out, absolutely.
I'd love to put off the haunting stuff as long as possible, I need time to study it so I can do a good job and all that. THe rethuglivcans cna waint, hell they won;t change one bit, so any time will be a good time to start f*#king with them.
Lois I can work on in this plane when I'm feeling the need for endless frustration ROTFLMAO!!!!!
I havea feeling if she read baycevich's book and a few chapters of thomas franks the wereacking crew, she just might wake up, as would many in fact.
the main problem with the retugs, is, they foold the 'good ' republicans and are keeping the wool pulled over the eyes of what are bsically good but ingnorant people. a large part of the problem is, NOBODY woudl ever expect their public servants to be so dedicated to evil, and make no mistake, the hadr right REthugs ARE evil.. Just ask Fatty.
How he can stand it I ahve no idea.
he can't be as bad as teh scum he defends, it must be that he to is wquite ignorant of their actual goals, asn any reasonable thiniing person KNOWS we needa viable middle class to havea decent country, hell it's plain and simple that is. but htat is NOT what hte hard right wingnut rethugs want, OH NO.
just ask yorsekf if this makes any sense at akll, especially in light f the compltete adn utter failure for the last 8 years of mostly unrestrained rethuglican nonsese:
1. busness will do no wron, needs no reguoation, in fact, all regulation is bad. Like we need MORE salmanella in the peanut butter, LOL. yeah.
2. GOvernment is bad. Well it is is you purposly MKE it ineffectuao ns stupid, which is a started goal of the rethugs, and it plays right into their spel: creatd inept pitiful crap departments by gutting thier resources, appointing certain losers or industry insides (from the industry that department is supposed to oversee) and then when it totally screws up, you say, see, government does not work! we shoudl get rid of this epartment adn let good old business handle itself. HAHAHAHA fooled you again!
3 a tax on business is a mortal sin. this one is self expanatory, but incredibly stupid. businesses have aleayws paid taxes, they just don;t want to., hell they want to put every penny in theior pokcet nad have all the money, likea monopoly game. well see, did you ever PLAY monopoly? in the end, ONE person ahs evertything ,and everone else is bueste. it's a fun gaem, but no way to run a counrty, I promise, LOL. but htat's how business think it should be, weht a serf labor class to serve them,hehehe.
Oh well gota go.
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Jaybro
Social climber
wuz real!
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Dirt, do you still have an A to laugh off? In any case, i'm with you laughing off whatever it is that we share, to laugh off.
Lois, as your tenacious little bro, you know I'm not going anywhere new, now. Transcontinental travel plans can be problematic. When the time is right I will be there and we ( you, me and your guy) will plant something for another generation to enjoy. Pennsylvania is a kinda hardwood place, ain't it? What about some sort of Maple, maybe an Oak?
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dirtineye
Trad climber
the south
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lots of places carary tulip poplars, try for some from tennesee, not florida.
I have to say you are making a good choice, and ad for that next gen thing, well, not true for Tulip poplars at all, unless you jsut want a 100 foot giant of 3 or 4 feet diam to call it a tree,
In 10 years you'll be getting fowlers and thatis if you start from one foot tall stuff, or bscially almost seedlings . spend for a 5 or 7 year tree and well, you gethte idea. thayt are not expensive. hell you could go dig some up along any new road cut, they are a soft hardwood, that tends to be the first wave or nature reclaimging disturbed ground. they come up like weeds around the south anytime anyone clear a lot or builds a road. they also seem to be fairly drought resisatnt-- we have never lost one to drought, nd hte same cant be said for the hardwoods like oak of any sort and any number of other native tree on the mountain. w just ha a three year drought in alabama and no tulip poplar seemed to eve n suffer. Lost a few of everything else though, and we live in the woods. Oaks are a LOT more finicky than tulip poplars.
Again, if yo ustart with a 5 - 7 year old tree it really won't cost much and you'll get that flowers in a few years wiht any luck at all, and they rock. at 20 years they will be about 40 to 50 feet tall, unless you do soemthing really bad for em. they are very fast and hardy. I don;t know why people do not use em moreas they are very beautiful, hard to knock down (never seen one tipped by storm or hurricane leftovers, oreven tornado, and cna't say that about oaks or any other tre in fact. actually, oaks and chestnut oaks in particluar seem to do VERY badly in big strms or tornados
glad you liked the snowberry coreopsis. they are chaep enogh, jsut get a few plants and let them seed for you. they make a ton of seeds. one plant will ahve a buttload of flowers on it. you can buy em for about 5 bucks a good sized plant at lowes in spring, LOL. seeds woudl be cheper of course, but you'd have to wait a little while.
THey sure do look good. not sure if snowberry is a developed on or a wild one, but htey look so nice, who cares? and they are easy. hell you could have a field of em, what a sight that would be. it would knock your socks off.
My sugge4stion on planting the TPs woudl be, not a grove, but spread around. they have such grace and charm you kind of want them to be a little free standing and uncrowded, if yo uget my drift. TP is aa very elegant looking tree. if yo udid plant enough, the wood is fantastic to work with for any sort of milling as it has no real grain problens or knots, and will take paint very nicely. IT is strong and light. it used to be the wood of preference for finsh work , moldings and window frames and mullions, for the reasons I jsut mentioned. you might evne try making some moeny growing it for mill work. you could check out your area and see if htere is a demand. from seedlings we are talking 20 years to harvest a LOT of wood that is as I said very good for any mill work or finish carpentry.
If I ahd to grow one kind of three, the tp would be it. a property covered with them would be very attractive. I've seen forsets in NE georgia nda tenneseee wher the TP was teh common wood, and it jsut looks realy nice. as I said the TP isa very elegant stately tree.
Enough already LOL.
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Karl Baba
Trad climber
Yosemite, Ca
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Since we are on this subject, a close friend of mine went to a meditation retreat shortly after her 16 year old beloved dog died.
She had a way of asking the Spirit for “a sign.” She said that she had only used it a couple of times in her life, out of respect and not to abuse this need.
So it’s dead calm and she is sitting under a tree. She asks the Spirit for a sign that her sweet pooch is “Ok.”
Immediately there is a single, sudden gust of wind and a leaf blows off the tree and falls down directly in her hand.
Peace
Karl
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dirtineye
Trad climber
the south
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yeah Karl, I used to have stuff like that happen, looking for 'mountain spirits or whatever, out climbing, LOL.
It would be nice if it were real. Sometimes I almost beleive it.
but not really.
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Dick_Lugar
Trad climber
Indiana (the other Mideast)
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Hey Curt,
Got any classical guitar links or downloads to listen too today? If not of yourself, how 'bout some of your favs. Just curious who you got on your hit list. Thx.
Frank
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dirtineye
Trad climber
the south
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well dick, frankly, I'm on my hit list. here, try this. Pbucket screws up the sound somehow about half the time, but I think this one works.
I'll have another cd or two out in a week or two, maybe y9 0ucan get a copy, and there are three tacks one per year on the fretted Instrument cherismas CD, if yo ucna find those, LOL. they are supposed to be fre for the asking, but nvitation only to the playrers, so mostly they are good. OF course, my track is alwasy the best LOL.
If I ahve the endery I'll be going commercial very soon, but three years uf uniterrupted misery had made it hard to getthings done, but I'll see if I can get you the 22 min thing if yo ulike. send me a mailing address. OR ask Blanchard for a copy, it;s all done in his guitar anyway. Hope to have one with the gilbert and one with the doolin too soon. we'll see.
Gotta make an hour long "realaxing masages theraly cd for my hospicd voluteer massage guy, maybe that will be good too, we'll see.
anyway, let's see how this works. I wrote this a few yearsa go on the gilbert, it came partly rom something I did for a friend who was dying from cancer but her idiot family NEVER played it for her. I'm still madabout htat GRRRR.
http://s32.photobucket.com/albums/d13/Climbingoldguy/video/?action=view¤t=100_1557.flv
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survival
Big Wall climber
A Token of My Extreme
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Wow Curt. That is truly beautiful.
I can play some pretty things, but nothing at your skill level.
Mine is all a bit rougher (sloppy?)
I play 5.8-5.9 guitar and you're pulling down the 5.12.
Good job brother.
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Dick_Lugar
Trad climber
Indiana (the other Mideast)
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Wow Curt! Sounded great on my end...that's a beautiful song. Has a nice classical/retro sound to it. I'm a fledgling player, but like the oldies but goodies, F. Sans, Bach, etc.
What name did you give this song, BTW?
Enjoy your massage, hope it brings you some relief. Have a good day. (edit: misread your post...you are making a CD for your massgage therapist, got it.)
Keep posting songs if you'd like, I'll keep listening.
Edit#2: I'll email you sometime today!
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dirtineye
Trad climber
the south
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That one is called, like a thousand others haha, Fantasy.
Yeha I'm retro as hell, no modern crap for me.
Actually I am not a 5.12 player, I am (so I've been told) world class. Not my term, that's what people say. I jsut backed into it by accident. But Ideed I am real, I finally had to face that. actually it was a shock. YOU don;t expect these things to happe. somethiems they do though. gotta keep at what y9ou do and have faith in yourself I guess, you never know what could happen. ANd how did I do it? Well I ahve talent, but that and a warm bucket of spit are wirth the same. I PREACTICE and PRACTICE and PRACTICAS and then I PRACTICE some MORE, cause That's how things happe. YOU make yourself better than you are, by wiorking at it every damend day of yoru life and not giving up.
Anyone who tells you different is either tragically gifted or an idiot, but I'll tell yo ua gifted person who does NOT put in the effort will still not have what they should have.
According to GIlbert I owe it to the world to get this stuff out, LOL, whinc stikes meas a bit funny that the greatest living clasical gultar maker, considerad a god by many players and luthiners around the world, like my stuff. he has opened many doors for me with one phone call.
Too bad I'm sick or life would be excellent. Oh well.
If I ahd 5 more yearse I'd be able to write probaly 3-500 mpore tunes. not gonna hjappen now, so i'm stuck with about 200.
I'll see what else I can dig up later. I just don;t ahve much energy for such things right now
Oh goddammait I'm doing it again. I am NOT a role model, I'm not a philosopher, I hate such crap, I SUCK!! don't listen to me, go think for yourselves! YOu have to do that. I bet most good climbers know that anyway. haha.
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mooser
Trad climber
seattle
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Re: Your video...
UN...believable.
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darod
Big Wall climber
South Side Billburg
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daaaamn dirt!!?? I watched all 8 videos, inspiring stuff man!
and i'm def trying the "old-fashion" shoe lacing...
darod.
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survival
Big Wall climber
A Token of My Extreme
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I stand by 5.12........
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dirtineye
Trad climber
the south
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Did the sound work on on all of em? I updated my xp and idiot windows meda player codec screwed up my quick time player.
I cna mayube dig out a few more later, if I feel up to it. BUT, maybe in a few weeks I'll have commercial stuff, as in complete CDs, which yo uare all expected to pay dearly for, LOL.
Except Blanchard Doolin and Gilbert get free copies. it's only fair.
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survival
Big Wall climber
A Token of My Extreme
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The sound was up on all 8 of them Dirt. Nice work.
Signed,
20 yr hacker......
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Dick_Lugar
Trad climber
Indiana (the other Mideast)
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Yep, sounded stellar on my end Curt. Enjoyed them all...thanks for the videos. Not sure if you used the same guitar for all the videos, but the quality of sound on them is amazing.
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dirtineye
Trad climber
the south
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the guitars are different. two are on the gilbert, and I think the rest are the blanchard.
DID you guys know that Mark Blanchard is QUITE the guitar builder in his own right? I love hise work, and love playing on the one he made for me.
Wish he had time to make me another, but it ain;t going to happen.
anyway if yo uwat one of the best steel strings around, check out Blancard, the d not dissapoint.. blows most stuff so far away you will never find it
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nita
climber
chica from chico, I don't claim to be a daisy
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Dirt, Beautiful! totally loved your music.... It's good to know you are not in pain,i only wish your health news was better....I 'm going to miss you....Best wishes..xo, nita.
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Jaybro
Social climber
wuz real!
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Nice playing!
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divad
Trad climber
wmass
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Good stuff, dirt
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Bart Fay
Social climber
Redlands, CA
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Good luck with what's left, Senor Dirt.
Kinda cool to have this extended group of rubberneckers who care about you and your story.
I'll certainly think of you every time I need to use a squeezey mustard bottle for my 'oscopies.
Neither of use should be happy about that.
Regardless of my doctor's prognostications, I'm hoping not to eventually contract your malady.
Still, it makes me think that I better get started becoming 'World Class' in something.
Whatvever comes, I hope I can handle it with your blend of humor/style/honesty.
-Bart
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Jennie
Trad climber
Idaho Falls
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Topic Author's Reply - Mar 2, 2009 - 09:56pm PT
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You're really a master, Curt... Beautiful!
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dirtineye
Trad climber
the south
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thanks you all. Now i gues I have to dig out some more GRRRR. YOu're not letting me be much of a curmudgeon here are you?
Got 4 real mail letters from ST people today, thanks to all who wrote. made me cry it did.
every time i think of NIta in those old pics I wish I had met her way back, and um, well you know, chased after her like a puppy dog, LOL.
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Zander
Trad climber
Berkeley
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Hey dirt,
Just listened in to your recording. That is some beautiful playing. I enjoyed it,
Thanks,
Zander
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Todd Gordon
Trad climber
Joshua Tree, Cal
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Here's a little something for you;....Yesterdays FA.................Dirtineye 5.9* Queen Mountain, Joshua Tree. I raise my glass and tip my hat to you. It's a fine route with way cool climbing on very good rock in a fantastic wilderness setting. Cheers. Todd Gordon and the Gordobots.
(FA T. Gordon, T. Tech, Blitzo, Resa Ashbachar, Flouride, Peter March 1, 2009.)
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neebee
Social climber
calif/texas
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hey there dirtineye/curt...
just dropped by this "place of yours" to see how you're doing today...
say, i SAW the music link...
oh, this is very lovely music... this is real music... to just sit down and hold a guitar and-----------play it...
my computer is still downloading, so it IS coming in, in bits of peices... yet, as lovely as can be, STILL...
:)
*still in your corner... as with all the supertopo folks... :)
*dont forget, even on hard days or dreary days, or mad grumpy days:
look in the mirror and smile... and, be your best friend...
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neebee
Social climber
calif/texas
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hey there todd... thanks for sharing that nice climbing pic, too...
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mcreel
climber
Barcelona, Spain
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Good stuff. Unfortunately the speakers of this computer don't let me appreciate the sound of the guitars. I'm curious about the Blanchard. Are your songs completely worked out, or do you improvise a bit?
The shoe tying video is saved by your mellow accent. Reminded me of spending the summer with my grandparents down in Alabama. "Ah believe ah have a flah in mah ah."
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dirtineye
Trad climber
the south
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good grief Todd, did you really name a route after ME?
what can I say, I'm stunned. Wish I could return the favor. I guess if a miracle happens I'l have to hit the BSF oor LK with SAteg and we'll find domething worthy.
HEll YOU should come to the BSF, damn man, more new 200+ foot sandtone haard as nails than you could even just walk past in your lifetime, let alone climb it all.
THe main guy there, Jeff Noffsinger, he just rediscovered a 2 mile long 235 foot wall he had forgottoen about, LOL, that's how much rock is there. U know for out west 2 or three pitches is not tha big a deal, but I can't stress enough how high quality that sandstone is. I'm SO SPOILED, LOL, never had to climb on crap rock except for that one trip to Jtree.
I guess I should say I wish I had been with you guys in better days, and seen the real Jtree. apparently if you know much about hte place and where to go it's pretty good after all, LOL. GOD I hate saying that about quartz monsonite, UGH. I really hate to be reasonable.
THere is also a pile of stuff that got partially aided that coudl go free with a little determination, steg has been knocking a few of those out as well, but Jeff just likes getting them up and moving on, cause ther is SO MUCH to do.
YOu gotta see the box car roof, it's actually a rectangluar 'cutout" way way bigger than a box car, with so fat two routes one at each corner, arno and jeff did the left, jeff n me and patrick did the right (BOx Car Willies), but there's this one up the middle just sitting there...
Hey neebster, glad you like the music, and thanks for the card, got it today.
Mcneel, that's a good question. actually some of those videos are the FIRST time any of that was ever played, I use my MIGHTY POS from KOdak to keep records of tunes as they pop into my head so I won;t forget em, and man does it ever work,. LOL I'd probalby havbe about 20 tunes that I coudl remember if I didn;t have those creppy little videos, but since I do just turn it on wehnever I get something I like, I have way over 60 complete and about 200 some of which need second parts or polish, so anyone who is trying to make music, don;t fall for that stupid idea that the good wil lstick with you or it was not mean t to be, LOL, the wya it really works is, you cna forget sometehign WONDERFUL ahd it's gone forever. HEll I have has so many tunes that I stuck down ONE TIME ONLY, then totally forgot about for months or even years, and then I am gong though the archive and hit one and think, " HOW could it be that I am not playing this one all the time???" and then I reamp it up and the thing is NOT lost, LOL it's in there, and some are again so good I have no idea how I ever passed em over in the first place.
But hts short anser is, hell yeah, I improvise a lot. adn I reafind some of that improvisation sometimes and sometimes I leave em free form and just let em be however thay want to be.
I am not totally in control of what comes out, but when I'm on it alwasy comes out good, or I can rescue it on the fly LOL, well usually I can.
I like complete fixred pieces too though, but I ALWAYS reserve the option to vary. you really have to do that.
THe more classical stuff I usually leave em alone cauwe I CANT improve a lot of my work, when it's done it's done, and I refuse to add poiontless meaningless variations just to ahave variations.
When I think it's as good as it can be, I may do very slignt little variation but preserving the themes and keeping it MUSICAL is way more important that adding a bunch of superfluous mindless notes which actually detracts from the work if you ask me, and I'm aleasy right about these things. Really. HAH if I don;t have it right the damend thing just keeps churning til it is right.
One of my great frinds, an accomplished harp plaayer ((scottish national champ in USA twice, third in teh ALL Ireland's as a furiner ( THose Irisk HATE it when a furiner wins out over natives in thier comp, LOL) well, anyway, tracy and I talk a lot, and one time I told her ( and I dont; tell many people this excpet now you all will know just how nuts I truly am) but I used to feel like the ghost of Turlouch O'Caroaln sat on my shoulder while I arranged his tunes and wrote my own, and she ageed taht he probably did, LOL.
I mean, I REALLY used to beleive taht, and hell sometimes I still do. and I'm a damned card carrying atheist for pete's sake, LOL.
But on the other hand I respect people like Neebee and Jennie for thier beleifs casue I think they are sincers and try to take the good from the idea ofgod and religion, as oppsoed to what most people do, but that's another stsory, and I do appreciate all the prayer, and hell I sure wish it would work!
I'd LOVE to have to eat my words and beleive, but I'd still be mad at god cause I think he's f*#ked up an awful lot, but again, that's another story.
ANeway, does that answer your questioin? Myself, I'd put it in the too much information category, LOL, but really, there's some good advice about music for anyone who might care about such things, and a good perspective if you like to try to understand composing, which is very different from playing or performing other people's work.
Even playing your own compositions is very different from playing someone else's with a whole different set of problems you have to learn to handle, and it can be a real pain sometimes.
Oh well, enough for now, hope that explained things a little.
HAHA if anyone want's to beg to differ or or offer some other thoughts about the subject, I'd love to hear it. Music I mean, not religion and god, LOL.
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Dick_Lugar
Trad climber
Indiana (the other Mideast)
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Curt, this is a "CURMUDGEON FREE ZONE!"...didn't you get the memo???
Todd, what a great tribute to make to someone, and it happens to be a great name for a climb: "Dirtineye". I'm putting it on my hit list, and seeing how it is a 5.9, I just may be able to make it up it!
Frank
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dirtineye
Trad climber
the south
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Oh about hte blanchard, what do you want to know?
It's wonderful, and few make instruments that are a fine as the ones Mark makes, no kidding.
He's way undervalued, you should get one. They are not cheap, but htey are as good as anything and I am talking people are charging 15-25k for guitars that are in Blanchard's league, well, 10k is pretty much his high end for a flat top, and that's expensive too, but still it's possible to get one for less, and he realy can't build anything bad, I just don;t think it's possible. Check out his site.
Yeha I'm shamelessly promoting the guy, but it's because he's that good. I have to say you want something with magic in it, Blanchard has that. It's an unreal sound. NOTHING I ever heard can touch my Blanchard. If I ever think one can, LOL I just change strings ( they can go two months on tha blanchard and be fine, which is also very odd, but I won't complain LOL) and then the Blanchared is way out front again. THree months is too old LOL, but I slip up once in a while, cause it still sounds so good, just it's better with slightly newer strings, of course.
http://www.blanchardguitars.com/
And here's a pic of mine, it has a deeper cutaway and 26 frets. Trns out the extra frett thing is good for 22 or 24, but I was figureing that out at the time. My doolin has 29, but again, I fell thelimit for a guitar that will stillsound fantastic at every point is 22 or 24. and my music needs at least 22, and I demand that makers make 22 freet necks that are EASILY PLAYABLE right up to number 22 or 24, and they need to get wit hthe program and realize that this is where the guitar is going and I'm right goddamnit, and stop with all thei 12 and 14 fret neck nonsense LOL!
http://www.blanchardguitars.com/guitarpages/options/options.html
WHich brings me to DOolin, check him out too, I love my doolin. I speced the gutar for him, he redesigned his already radical guitar for me, and managed ot geve me a PERFECT recording guitar with the neck joining at hte 20th fret, and wnat a dream that thing is.
Because it is designed specifially for recording, it is way different from teh blanchard in every way, but still it has a sound that is a dream.
It's a wonderful thing to have a bunch of world calss guitars to play on.
Here's my thought n way costly instruments and amateru/beginner, casual players: WHy the fvck not, if yo ucan afford it.
GUitars work like this: YOU will not play better on a better guitar if you siuck, but you have the potential to do things yo ucannot do on a factory isnstrument, and a great instrument can encouragel to to work harder and play more and THEN yes you are better, and shoudl you reach a high enough level of proficiency, that incredible instrument will give back so much more, that indeed yo uawiLL play better, but beware, a great instrumen it much more treacherous than a poor one, and will shoe your every flay ina big way, which crappy guitars tend to cover up because they are not capable of nuance or subtlely, and also not as capable of shoeing off yoru higreat honking mistakes, LOL!
WHen I went from a pretty nice student gread calssical fto my gilbert, I bsically had to learn to play all over atain, because I agilbert is so alive in forgives NOTHING, so you have to be it's master, and rise to techi=nical perfection, and yo ufind yout that you were makind msitakes in techniwue that the crappy gutiar doens;t even express, so you don't even know how bad you really are, LOL!
But when you accept the challenge of a great instrument, and meet it on it's level ( for the Gilbert, that's WORLD CLASS or sound like shyte, really, not much in between) you can really get music out of this thihgs, and you can make it behave in ways htat really enhance the pieces, and none of this will ever be possible on a shoddy or low end or even some pretty expensive factory stuff, thay just can;'t do it.
Of course your hand made guitar, made by a true master who really underatnds and can creat a very sensitive instrument is in a totally different ballpark, hell it's another universe from ANY factory guitar.
ONe more thought on guitars:
dark guitars cover up a multitude of sins, both by the maken and by the player. A 'Live guitar is hte opposite-- it covers up NOTHING exposes your every flaw, and will betray you instantly if you are not the master. I'm talking every finger placed and picked up perfectly, or you get evil disgusting sounds that you really don't want ( and cant even hear on a dark guitar).
NOw many people love the dark sound, it is hte classic sound for a spanish classical to have , and htey can be very sweet withoout you doing much ( lively bright guitars you ahve to work to make em sound sweet). Indeed a lot of music especcially romantic spanish music sounds best on these dark guitars, so it's not that they are really bad, it's just that people like me prefer the lively ones.
Ack I'm writing a book.
Gotta go.
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dirtineye
Trad climber
the south
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Curmudgeon free? Nobody told me that. I don't belieive it.
How can a site full of old climbers be curmudgeon free?
Impossible.
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mcreel
climber
Barcelona, Spain
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Thanks for the explanation. I like the idea of recording using video, since it gives you a lot more clues about what you actually did when you made some sounds. I record using a looping device, which is great for playing around, but is not great for remembering how I made the parts that sound good.
I really agree about good guitars. A guitar will stay with you for a long time, and you want to spend your time with a good one (or several).
Cheers!
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Tarbuster
climber
right here, right now
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Dirt Daddy,
That's some pretty clean playing for a "Dirty" old man!
Thanks for putting that up.
-Tarbaby
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the Fet
Knackered climber
A bivy sack in the secret campground
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It's great to have the old curmudgeon back posting on the taco. And even better to hear his absolutely fantsatic fretwork. Beautiful and impressive.
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Off White
climber
Tenino, WA
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Well Dirt, we never much interacted here but I often found you entertaining, occasionally horrifying, seldom boring, and that's all to the good. As a fellow non believer, I really appreciate you keeping those gritty atheist principles down to the bitter end, I'll be in that trench too. I think your story also prompted me to follow through on that first colonoscopy just a few months after I turned 50 (and in case anyone wonders, I've got a clean sexy polyp free colon, whoo hoo). There's no more to this life than what we see and feel, but that's more than enough for me, sounds like for you too.
In my minds eye, you'll be conjuring a smirk as you exit the stage, and I hope you wring the last drop from what you've got left. Hell, I hope we all do.
best
Off White
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Jaybro
Social climber
wuz real!
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Yeah watch those opiate metabolite half lives. Vedauwoo lost it's most prominent climbing author when he od'd on demerol (?), prescribed for migraines, almost twenty years ago. I'm sure someone will correct me if I have some details off. I don't think we need to use the person's name.
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Jennie
Trad climber
Idaho Falls
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Topic Author's Reply - Mar 3, 2009 - 10:58pm PT
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Mighty Hiker
Social climber
Vancouver, B.C.
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That's a very nice photo! When/where was it taken?
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darod
Big Wall climber
South Side Billburg
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Dirt, those are some big ass tricams!! I think if i'd have to carry just one of those i'd have to climb at least 2 grades lower!!!
more photos please!!
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Tarbuster
climber
right here, right now
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He's cranky, he'll cuss you out, he's Curt!!!
You can watch him play some sweet guitar... for a little while longer.
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murcy
climber
San Fran Cisco
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Dang, you're an expressive player, dirt. Thanks for the guitar tips and the inspiration.
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justthemaid
climber
Los Angeles
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Glad you are feeling better Curt.
You - resting in the shade after the Laurel Knob death march.
Side note- Curt was so messed up he had to rest about every 100 feet Only took 4 hours, but he made it. His curmudgeonly powers prevailed.
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Mimi
climber
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Curt, there will always be the peonies. I know you recall the line from the movie Year of Living Dangerously; the scene by the Dutch plantation's pool when the doomed driver asks Guy to remember him having a drink poolside. By remembering him, he would continue to persist through time.
We'll be lauging if you're wrong about being worm dirt, Dirt. Hang in there, man, and enjoy your visit with that JelloGuy. God bless.
Good one, Jennie.
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Fletcher
Trad climber
here to eternity
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Just watched a few of those video clips... dang, for a grumpy guy there sure is some beautiful expression coming out of your heart. Thanks for sharing that.
Fletch
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Todd Gordon
Trad climber
Joshua Tree, Cal
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Beautiful guitar ;...thank you...
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dirtineye
Trad climber
the south
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I'm just stunned. what can I say? You guys are great.
I love you skip. Always will. Gear thief, haha.
THe Lowester and I had a great time, we really have a lot in common, a little too much in fact LOL. I'll be pating him a visit if some of my issues can be fixed. Utah is not very far from Idaho, I might get to meet the bad little mormon girl who tries to be good, or is it the other way areound? hehe. RRK kept us is stitches. we must get him to post his true story about the earnest angely plant.. god is that ever funny. Poetic justice and irony in action!
God I'd have a great life if I just were not dying from cancer.
The gear pic is at Palisades park, AL a COUNTY park that the people of blount conty are very rpoud of, and rightfully so.. totaly climber friendly, jsut no bolts, ever, but you can toprope evything there. superior bullet hared sandston (southern and almost metamrphic, lots of heat adn pressure in the past, NOT lieks the stuff out west at all, about 90 feet, from 5.4 to 5.12, and some BUT hard oldscholl stuff taht let y0ou appreciat thea 5.6, 7, 8 used to be HARD, once upon a time, before rating inflation.
I have led a charmed life in climbing. Althoguh people tried to get me to climb in the 70's teh 80s adn the 90s, I didn;t start til 2001, after cancer fthe first two times. I jsut lucked out, ahveing the right body, attitude and a little talent, adn I just kept meeting truly great clinbers ahd htting it off with them and alwasy had someoen to show me jsut what I needed to be better, and I studied a lot as well, and I loved it, adn thanks to who I met and climbed with I probably have more days and more time on new rock that most people ever get.
aHAHA people whoud l say, YOur gear looks too new, adn I'd say, my gear has been places you'll never see. adn it was jsut the truth.
It's really been likea fairy tale, as far a acllimbing goes. for boudlering ah had lee payne, adam henry, adn the great bob comrmany. FOr rope climbing I ahd arno, jeff noffsinger, shannon steg, jim corbet, jim Okel adn rrk and scot perkins. that's quite a collection of southern climbers.
To bad I got sick again, or I'd be clibming now, with steg, pirateing routes at LK, or adding to the routes at the BSF, like I had planned. What a dream, to go to the BSF with Jeff noffsinger ( fearless, great climber, wonderful person, THE guy for the BSF, and saw the box car roof for the first time and hes says, that's what we're getting on. Oh My GOD! hadn to learn to aid on taht climb, first aid ever was free hanging, with a ten minute explaination of how to do it, LOL. I went free as soon as I could couch rock with al fours, LOL and knew I HAATED aid, it is a last resort, but thank god for Yates shiled harness nad Yates wall ladders. John Yates ALWAYS talked to me and explained things, and I LOVE his products. HEll THe usba guys, when they were in business, sent me cool unavailable versioins of theyr incredible ti nuyt tool, best nut tool ever, and they even sent me a special pin htat was the ONLY thing that coudl protect the direct start of SUpergumbiewannabee, and then some motherfvcker stole it, and the direct is seriously dangerous , but at leaset the indirect is still OK and hell the roof is the best part anyqay. that's gotta be my favorit climb/fa, along with screwed, wich COrbett took 4 faalls atil he puled the gear adna really fewll on an RP, and then some idiot stole THat, after we left it out ofrespect, cause it totally saves his butt, one tiny brss nut between him and the ground and all that. and me with a fvcked up should had to lead though it finaly, it all wet and the halelujah hold esad FFULL of hard very slikc mud, and all the times y0u oare just hoping you get to that nice pocket, but that first teim, it's fvcking useless, haha, and I ahd to hang in some how and scoulp out three handfulls of slick wet clay to have a lod at all, good grief, but it as so much FUN, and NOBODY will ever have the gut crushig feelling of making the pocket and findint thaty it is worthless and they are about to go down, hahahha. But I didn't taht time.
Micahle crowder likes to say that an fa 5.6 is better than a 5.10 reapeat any day, and I adhere to that. cause it's true.
and free soloing onsight in trail shoes is stupid as hell but god I loved it.
I was born to climbl adn at leaste I got to do it wit GREAT people who bedame GREAT friends adn I'llalasy have that. jsut atered leate, and got cut short, too bad, but what a blindingly bright and concentratied adn damned near prefect if a little short short experience I was given.
Liie hte android sayssa in blade runner all these things will be gonewhen I die, but I guess it's OK cause at least I got to DO them and I am thankful for that, adn for the fantastic people I met.
It's been truly a blast and almost unbelieveable, like a movie or a fantasy come true. Only better than that cause it was real.
Long live adventure climbing. get on some new rock, it'll do you good. ahve as m8uch fun as possible, that'll do you good too. tell the asshols teo get lost, or ignore em, I wish ahd ahd ignored em more, haha. Some people jsut can't stand it when someoen else is ahveing too much fun. Kind of funny how that works.
god what a ramble.
thanks again for all teh support, it means something. it helps. SO happy someone else got the colonsocopy. I did a little good after all.
HEy tarbaby, I'm really sad we probably won't get to climb that hourglass thing. would hav Woudl have been great to meet and climb with you. same is true for a lot of st denizens. maybe hters' still an outside shot, if it works out, I'll be there. aboout half speed, after all teh surgery and missing parts, but I'll be there.
On the bright side, I wonder if missing 1/3 y0ur internal anatomy helps with climbing? it's goTta be lighter for sure!
I wish I had my girl back. and could be healthy.. but y0u know what they say, wish in one hand, shyte in the other, see which one fills up first hahahahha.
Man can I ever ramble. Hope you enjoyed it. I did.
More later. thanks for the real mail letters and the emails. it's nice. it helps. I really didn't realize how good most of the folks on st are, but they really are. thank you for that.
more later. thanks again. bye now.
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Hardman Knott
Gym climber
Muir Woods National Monument, Mill Valley, Ca
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Dirt - I enjoy your ramblings; always have. Keep 'em coming!
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dirtineye
Trad climber
the south
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HK I'm depending on you to carryt on teh curmudgely tradition when I'm gone. and DONT let your COG licesns expire.
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snoreta01
Boulder climber
east vinod nagar , delhi
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I congratulate you.
Rocky
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mcreel
climber
Barcelona, Spain
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Hi Dirt, I've been listening to your songs again. The steel string with the rounded cutaway that appears in several of the videos is the Blanchard, correct? Or is there more than 1 steel string?
By any chances do you ever play country blues stuff? I don't hear much of a suggestion of that sort of thing in your videos, but I'm just curious, since that's what I mostly play on acoustics.
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dirtineye
Trad climber
the south
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Yes that is the Blanchard. there are only two guitars posted in thos videos, the Blanchard and the Gilbert. I should make one with the DOOlin to further confuse people, haha.
I don't do any country , but sometiems I will play apppalacian stuff (old time they call it in a global sense) and a few of my compositions are definately american, NOT celtic, and then again some sound more like classical pieces, but at heart, I like Celtic, it is teh bigest influence for me, adn really, the best kind of music.
I honestly think that if hte idit English had not tried to stamp out Irish culture, tharer would be at least ONE IRish composer rom that era who would be seen in the same class as hayden(SP) and brahms and all those guys, the big guns, even bach and Beethoven.
HTat's just my opinion, probably nobody but an irishman would agree, haha, now ask me if I care.
Turlough O'Carolan was THE guy for incredible harp tunes, as good as ANY coposer who ever lived to me, and I do ahve a I am told the best arraingments of his work for the guitar ever. that's roma Juliard trained calssical guitarist who used to give concerts in Europe, who looks around for this stuff, so I think he's probably right.
I really should work out a few more, but I'm pretty self absorbed in my own music and writing new ones, so, maybe yes, maybe no.
Still every once in a while, an Ocarolan tune just poops in unbiden, from the dark recesses of my mind, adn I cam play it, haha, wiwthout haveing to do any real work, so, I guess I can't turn that down.
I'm glad his ghost still visits from time to time.\
Check out hte late great Derrick Bell ( forrmerly of the CHieftains, tohaer a true musical prodigy play ocarolan on the harp-- you really won't beleive it. Sad he died young. I always meant to contact him and now it's way too late, adn so, also take the lesson, do it today, cause it might not be around tomorrw.
Good advice for normal people as well ash the dying, LOL.
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RRK
Trad climber
Talladega, Al
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ok here's an "action" shot of Dirt from wayback, clawing himself up some poison-ivy infested chosspile in NW Georgia. (Catch courtesy of Jim Corbett, photo courtesy of RRK). What's unusual about this shot is the near absence of gear hanging from OC. The picture posted previously of Dirt displaying his gear is actually of his "stinger" rack. When he starts up something new he carries at least three times that amount of gear ("Do we really need this anvil and forge?"). The good news is that it's impossible to be injured in a fall when climbing with Dirt since you can't break ground-effect with all the gear he wants to haul up and thus can't climb up high enough to really hurt yourself.
(The foregoing should provoke a response which will be entertaining for days to come.) Here's the shot (maybe)
RRK
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neebee
Social climber
calif/texas
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hey there dirtineye... say, just dropped by to say hi... got to run... got to try and find new work, or i will lose my itty bitty home, here...
sad but true... but i will leave you "happy smiles" none the less and hearty prayers... :)
say, keep remembering to look in the mirror and smile, as a smile is mighty powerful, as it reaches the inner man... no matter how we feel that we feel or look, the smiles transcends...
:)
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scuffy b
climber
just below the San Andreas
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He must have been out of his mind to be climbing with no socks.
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Tarbuster
climber
right here, right now
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Just where does he think he's going?
Oh well, 'footwork looks fairly articulate.
The whisk broom is a nice touch...
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neebee
Social climber
calif/texas
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hey there RRK... say, thanks for sharing the nice humor and pic of dirt/curt....
say--sure hope he has some tid-bits to add in, on the pic and all...
:)
*say, dirtineye, so you BRAVED poison ivy, huh, now did ya'?
:)
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Dick_Lugar
Trad climber
Indiana (the other Mideast)
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...somewhere in Alambama, an umpire is missing his home plate hand-broom! LOL!
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Mighty Hiker
Social climber
Vancouver, B.C.
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And Crawford, Texas is celebrating the return of its village idiot.
Curmudgeonly bump.
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RRK
Trad climber
Talladega, Al
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Hmmm my previous "bait" did not get a bite. This one will - it's Dirt downclimbing a pitch. This is also my preferred method of downclimbing, which is easily confused with "falling" by the casual observer. (In my own case if I'm saying "Sh#t Sh#t Shit" then I'm falling, otherwise I'm downclimbing) (Catch courtesy RRK, photo courtesy Mike Erickson.)
Couple of things about this shot - first is the complete absence of climbing shoes on Dirt. When my wife (who is not a climber) saw this shot she said "doesn't Curt have any climbing shoes?" Clearly she is a master of the obvious. Also see how far away from the wall I am while making the catch? The only reason that Dirt climbs at all is to get up over your head and wisk dirt down on you. My advise is, whenever possible set a directional and back off out of "clod range", take your shoes off and enjoy the show.
What is not obvious from this shot is the fact the the rope had already gone "tight" and Dirt was in the process of being projected into low-earth orbit through the "slingshot aid" method, which we pioneered a few years back. Note the belayer's "snatch" arm at nearly full extension. Also note the look of terror on Dirt's face, which a dead giveaway that Dirt is no longer falling, but rather gaining altitude rapidly. You shoulda been there - we could have sold tickets to this one.
(If he doesn't say anything about this I'm calling the paramedics)
RRK
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justthemaid
climber
Los Angeles
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Don't dis the beloved whisk boom Kenny. You know you like it.
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Mighty Hiker
Social climber
Vancouver, B.C.
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They certainly seem to have some interesting climbing techniques in Alabama. But then, who knew that they had climbers, and climbing?
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Zander
Trad climber
Berkeley
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That wisk broom is a classy touch. I'm going to have to get one of those. I wonder if it makes you lighter- witches and brooms and stuff.
Z
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Tarbuster
climber
right here, right now
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We can only hope Zander.
Alas, I think you just get Dirt in Your Eye.
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dirtineye
Trad climber
the south
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I doubtthat I am legentd ,aterial, butteh broom ahs certaly madeit's mark.
People laugh, until they try it.
very handy for getting a loose grit or lichen off the thing your life is about to depend on, haha!Steg got one. Brad MCleod got one.
And they only cost about a dollar at wal-mart. In the south a broom, a clipper, (pruning snips) adn a small folding japanese saw can be very helpful, LOL.
I usually would try to take teo PI off teh year before, as much as possible, cute hteroot, adn spray with roundup. I mostly tricked poele ( I'm not allergic to PI) into doing the really nasty stuff for me, LOL, Shannon swore he didn't get it, so I sent him uptheis really nice little crack taht is one of the nicer 5.7's at Lost wall, machete crack, cause we used a machete ro get the 2inch PI rots out, not to mention the 4 foot hgih stalks. Next day I call him anp and say, shannon, you got poison Ivy? the voice comes back liek this, as funny a ything as I ever heard him say" Form Head To Toe" witha litle pause between each word, and an aaaair of digust to it. HHA I got PI from that jsut by standing as far from the wall as possible, and still it got all over me. BUt he was greabbingthe roots bare handed.
I bet he does not do that again, hehe. THe only problen is I rean out of friends who claimed the didn't get it, BOO HOO.
Been pretty sick since Jeff left, got an infection in teh liver, that's no fun. But how it appears to be on the mend, and the docs are going to ry a procedure to get rid of the external drain and make things a lot safer and less painful ans stessful, which will e god if it works, and bad if it does not. only ohe option is more surgery to redo the breand new duct, ans surgery is a big risk for noe these days, but ny suregeon is good ( hel I lived though a wipple didn't I) so we'll roll the dice and see if we have to.
THose pics, never did finish that forst one, that's teh direct of Supergumbiewannabee, whre tie TI pin was stolen. I figuresds ou whta to do later, but then I broke my elbow and bythe times that healed enough to do taht overhanging 5.11 move, I as getting sick from cancer and just didn;t knwo it. BUT it was baffling in a wtf is wrong with me? sense. Oh well, the FA was dne freon the indirect, and I think the roof is the best part anyway.
Idiots should not steal fixed gear that is the ONLY pro protectng a ground fall. a pox on such fools. that pin was sent special from Ushba while they were stillin business it as the ONLY thing htat woudl go there, damnitall.
Perkins will probably go put a bolt there, but the pin was better ans less destructive and was never going to corrode. and that was important since water ran over that section a lot.
RRK actually loves having dirt dumped on him.. My pal Jeff Allen holds the record for dodging the most rock branches nd vines tossed down in one short climb though. SOmetimes in the south you have to excavate the routs, LOL.
In that falling pic, yes, I'm climbng in trail shoes, it's omly MAYBE 5.9, an no, I did not greab the rope , but it looks that way. that's one of my favorite pics. I hiet a wet slimy edge, started so slip, but instead of going back, I tried to gut it out adn put two sets of fingers onm the tiny slimy eges, adn slipped off.
Once the slime was gone, it want pretty easy. that's wha
t's fun about new or largely unclimbed routes-- you get an adventure, hehe.
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Karl Baba
Trad climber
Yosemite, Ca
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Sent some big Love from India recently to the DirtBro
I'd call it a Prayer but let's pretend I was trying to haunt you first.
PEace
Karl
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dirtineye
Trad climber
the south
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Karl, you can call it prayer. I'm not turning anything down from sincere folks.
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Karl Baba
Trad climber
Yosemite, Ca
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Thanks DirtMan
I think you getting real about your prospects on this thread and being open to accepting "what is" is a real contribution.
Oftentimes the dance of words around this kind of diagnosis turns into false optimism the results in every saying "Fight it dude, yur gonna live!' and nobody had a chance to clear their decks and make their peace.
That, and some classic Republican bashing at the end and you're going out in style.
Just better straighten up a tiny bit more for the final round or you'll go to where they send all the Republicans!
(just kidding, except fatty!)
Peace
Karl
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dirtineye
Trad climber
the south
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posted two more bits on Photobucket since peopel asked for it.
Tell me if the sound is OK, I still ahve to get EFFING XP upgrade fixed-- Micr$oft ruined my quicktime player ARGH!
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nita
climber
chica from chico, I don't claim to be a daisy
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Dirt, enjoyed the *chemo induced ramdomness* instrumental.. Shoe tying and yellow crocs,hmm....love how you say--half hitch.
good to see you are still hanging with us.;-)
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dirtineye
Trad climber
the south
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HAha, thanks Nita.
threaten to pay a visit, give me a good reason to keep on living, LOL.
THe chemo induced thing actually switched to Arno's March ( written mostly aroudn a campfire with arno)twoards the end.
anyone hear the new ones yet? well thay are not NEW adn in done yesterday, thay are new postings.
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Chicken Skinner
Trad climber
Yosemite
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Dirt, You are one tough dude. I am still looking forward to doing some bushwhacking with you.
Ken
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dirtineye
Trad climber
the south
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Well I hate to say it, but the way the hospice people talk, the end is near. I'm starting to believe it.
thanks for the thought though. I'd love to have it happen.
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darod
Big Wall climber
South Side Billburg
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hey dirt, those 2 last clips were pretty nice too, the sound wasn't bad at all even on my crappy laptop's speakers! keep'em coming if you can!!
hope you're in relative comfort.
rodrigo.
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Studly
Trad climber
WA
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Peace be with you bro. Many more mountains to climb.
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Jello
Social climber
No Ut
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Hey Dirt, it was great to see you and get to hear some tunes up close and personal-like. Also great to meet Kenny and Tom, and your wonderful mom and dad.
Unfortunately, I caught some bug on the flight home (or maybe on the way over), so I've been in bed most of the last couple of days. Went to the doc and got some antibiotics today, so hopefully it will clear up quick.
You are a good one, my friend!
-GreenPhlemJello
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dougs510
Social climber
down south
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Hey buddy.
thanks for being my friend when i was such a punk when I first came around the SCC, you, RRK, and Jenc were my advocates.
This really sucks man. I so wanted to get together and climb. Well, whatever happens, you have been a very kind man to me and I'll never forget it.
I wish you peace, and happiness wherever this road leads... may there be a great rock calling your name to "CLIMB ME".... somehow, I believe there is, not just for you, but for all of us who will follow.
Much love, peace and joy to you,
Doug
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Mighty Hiker
Social climber
Vancouver, B.C.
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Bump, cause I'm hoping to hear some more stories about Jello's visit with Dirt. Also I was wondering how he got the nickname dirtineye.
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dirtineye
Trad climber
the south
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Nah don't train wreck us anders. We had a great time, we have way too much in common, we hit it off. nothign to see here, move along. YOU know how I feel about trip reports, you think I'm going to give one?
JEllo can tell whatever he wants, I'm not saying anything.
wel. OK. I will say it was almost the same as wehn I met him years ago, except we are both in worse shape. That is to say, he's a great human bean, and one of the nicest most genuine people I EVER met, and I realy enjoyed our litte visit, ans hope we have time toe get togather again, but since it's my turn to travel, that just might not be possible, but I hope it will be.
Jello is as nice and good as Arno, and that is saying a LOT.
Doug, I'm honored taht you are so taken with me, and it's to be we didn't ever get to climb anything. given more time we would ahve.. Gad me and rrk and JEn were on your side, I could never see any reason not to be.. some true asshols in southern climbing, who do like to pick on people for no good reason, ain't taht jsut the truth. Hell some people think Adam Henry is snooby ans stuck up, but he's just sy, and not many will react nicely when you hit em with a shyte attitude. Hehe I actually owe my detractors a lot, cause they unwilttingly drove a lot of truly nice people my way, ROTFLMAO!!
Glad you guys liked the extra videos. I found a few more to put up soon. SOme of those wer only done ONCE ever, made up on the fly ansd came out just right, and without that little camera, they'd be totally lost. I love my mighty kodak POS!!!
WHihc brings up the subject of a meda player that solved my microsoft induced trouble-- the KMPlayer.. try it. it rocks!!! it's free!!! it's wonderful!!
if I forgot anyone I'l try again tomorrow.
thanks again for teh support. It's really nice. from everyone.
here's something I did learn along the way that seems to be true about every great climber I've known-- they dont care how good a climber you are, the care if you are a nice person and that youwon't get em killed climbing. maybe not true for all, maybe some won't give yo uthe time of day, but my experiece is that that sort of guys are usually the wannabees who care abouta lot of nonsense.
and see that's why I've had as much fun with pals who will never climb anything hard-- the yare nice and the try to be safe. And ANYONE can do that, if they want to. so in a way, anyone can be a great climber where it counts.
ACK getting alll advicey and guruewwy again better stop.
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neebee
Social climber
calif/texas
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hey there... dirtineye... say, just stopping in to see how the jello visit went...
say, just curious... have you ever wanted to set your ideas, or music into a book, or have you alread...
you could make a kids quitar book, too, to guide young ones into the interest...
if you have any kind of creative ideas in this type stuff... you can publish for free at lulu.com... check it out...
god bless... just thinking of more ways to keep that music moving...
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dirtineye
Trad climber
the south
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thaks neebee. I ahve some things in theworks, but will probably self produce the cds ( I want all the money) and let some place known for guitar music music print the score.
Or maybe I'll run out of time, we'll see.
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neebee
Social climber
calif/texas
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hey there dirt... say, i will be praying that the good lord's timeing is perfect for you.... and that all will fit into place... and that health will hold out...
say--- when you think of all the grade school kids that have these cancers and will never get to see and do what you have done, you can really see the power of time...
it is hard to realize how much of it we have moved through, in our small frame of it....
sure hope some of little guys and gals get to do some kind of music, dance, or art, so they can leave a legacy behind too, for their folks...
wow dirt... we can be so glad that you did not get sick as a young little-un, or we would not even know you today...
say, thanks for being around, so we got a chance to know you, and share some time, and learn about your climbing and music...
:)
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RRK
Trad climber
Talladega, Al
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Mighty Hiker wrote:
"They certainly seem to have some interesting climbing techniques in Alabama. But then, who knew that they had climbers, and climbing?"
You need to apply for associate membership in the "Association Alabama d'Alpiniste", which is an organization devoted to mountaineering in places where no mountains exist. We regularly climb at 2000 feet without supplemental oxygen. We compensate for our geographical inadequacy with excessive alcohol consumption (which has been proven to make mountains suddenly appear where none previously existed) We are more pompous than the French, more arrogant than the Italians, and more clueless than Congress.
If you are planning an expedition to Alabama you should be aware that mountaineers who are not accustomed to the thick air near sea level will need several weeks to acclimatize and minimize the risk of LAPE. Also if you do not consume alcohol, or do so only in moderation, then you should consider a different destination or else begin training immediately. Failure to exercise your liver prior to obtaining your visa and climbing permit may result in serious injury.
Although he routinely violates 2 of the 4 cardinal rules of climbing (1. Have fun; (2) don't kill yourself or anybody else; (3) don't screw it up for the next guy and (4) don't take it too seriously) Dirt has been elected president emeritus of the organization, primarily due to his exploits in establishing the world's only 1-pitch Grade VI. However I have been annointed "King for Life", and, more importantly, am in exclusive control of the key to the liquor cabinet. Be sure to check with me before setting off and I'll furnish beta on some indigenous climbing techniques which will help you avoid the "full bubba" rescue (that always gets in the news for some reason).
RRK
PS even I didn't know the extent of the "climbing problem" in Alabama until this past week. I was at dinner with Dirt and JeffLowe (in 'Bama we say it as one word, like Granny Clampett yelling for "Jethro") when the doorbell rings. The man at the door introduces himself then claims to already know Jeff, and starts in on a story about watching Jeff's show in Boulder back in the 80's. He then starts telling me about climbing in the Needles and then describes a mountaineering trip to the Winds. I was dumfounded. Regardless of what you might think, this is not the typical dinnertime conversation in Birmingham, Alabama. Turns out he's lived in Bham all his life and been climbing since the early 80's. Who knew?
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Mighty Hiker
Social climber
Vancouver, B.C.
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Thank you, RRK. I'm now much enlightened.
I did once climb with a guy from Alabama. We did the right side of Little John, in Yosemite. He learned as he went. I don't remember if he had climbed in Alabama. I'm afraid that hot, humid climates really aren't my forte, though it sounds like autumn there is quite nice.
Anyway, glad yawl had a visit from Jello, and a surprise visitor (lurker?).
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dirtineye
Trad climber
the south
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Mar 11, 2009 - 01:19pm PT
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well friday I get a procedure that if successful will end about 75%of my current misery (caused by the damned external drain for teh blocked bile duct)., so wish me some luck.. I'll need it.
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Ed Hartouni
Trad climber
Livermore, CA
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Mar 11, 2009 - 02:55pm PT
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good luck thoughts emanating out to you Dirt...
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Dick_Lugar
Trad climber
Indiana (the other Mideast)
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Mar 11, 2009 - 03:39pm PT
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Sounds like a worthwhile procedure Dirt, good luck!
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Karl Baba
Trad climber
Yosemite, Ca
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Mar 11, 2009 - 04:31pm PT
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"well friday I get a procedure that if successful will end about 75%of my current misery (caused by the damned external drain for teh blocked bile duct)., so wish me some luck.. I'll need it."
I'll be thinking of you. Remember me when you're getting overhauled so my prayer JuJu can find its address.
Wishing you the Best, whatever shape it takes.
Karl
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Karl Baba
Trad climber
Yosemite, Ca
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Mar 11, 2009 - 05:04pm PT
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Hey Dirty Dirty
There's one thing I need to add, very seriously.
There is one intention, some might call it a prayer, that I've found to be the greatest medicine. You can say it to yourself, or God or whatever. Just feeling it in your Heart is more than enough.
Express and intend
"I'm sorry for all those whom I've ever hurt in my life, please forgive me.
I freely forgive all those who have hurt me in my life, Be Free."
I swear to you that if you can pull that off with an honest feeling in your Heart, it will be the best feeling you can imagine.
We all have darkness in us, and hurt is a part of every relationship.
We even judge ourselves and wish ourselves ill because of lack of forgiveness of ourselves.
To forgive all is to forgive yourself.
Clear the decks and go out in style (or be a Miracle)
Loving You
Baba
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dirtineye
Trad climber
the south
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Mar 11, 2009 - 07:33pm PT
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good thought karl. I'm not sure I can let some people off just yet. I've got a few things I have to let myself off for too, just not quite yet. But a good thing to strive for, so I'll be trying.
I think as I get closer to death, things that were seemingly important start to fall away, ans what's really important becomes more clear. so maybe it will get easier to do before very long.
THings really do fall away-- control over your body, your life, everything except your thought, and even that goes at the end, I guess.
thanks for a great suggestion, Baba Rum Karl!
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dirtineye
Trad climber
the south
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Mar 11, 2009 - 07:37pm PT
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thanks for the thoughts ed and dick.
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'Pass the Pitons' Pete
Big Wall climber
like Ontario, Canada, eh?
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Mar 11, 2009 - 08:38pm PT
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Good karma, Karl.
"good thought karl. I'm not sure I can let some people off just yet."
Why knott? The only person you are hurting by holding onto unforgiveness is yourself, cuz they sure don't care. There is a selfish aspect to forgiveness, because it actually benefits you. True forgiveness takes time; it's a conscious decision to let the other person off the hook for the wrongs they did to you. It takes time and effort, but given enough of each, the feelings will eventualy follow.
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Karl Baba
Trad climber
Yosemite, Ca
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Mar 11, 2009 - 09:28pm PT
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Thanks for giving the idea a chance DirtMan. I like that you're honest enough to admit there's a few things you're holding on to.
I hope I, or we, don't get all preachy in Dirty but there's just one thing I need to add.
It is exactly the hardest forgiveness that has the deepest magic. Sit with the idea for a bit and when it starts to reveal its magic, then friggen get psyched, stare down the hardest bitter pill to swallow, and embrace it with all you can muster.
You don't want to skip the crux. You're going for the final send here so you won't need a rack or a rope. What you have to lose? To hold nothing against anybody is to be free.
Love it
Baba
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dirtineye
Trad climber
the south
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Mar 12, 2009 - 12:04am PT
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I suppose 215 posts without anything I didn't like was a lot. I had hoped it would stay taht way.
but I find this one completely in the category of annoying as hell, and inappropriate.
Author:
'Pass the Pitons' Pete
Big Wall climber
From: like Ontario, Canada, eh?
Good karma, Karl.
"good thought karl. I'm not sure I can let some people off just yet."
Why knott? The only person you are hurting by holding onto unforgiveness is yourself, cuz they sure don't care. There is a selfish aspect to forgiveness, because it actually benefits you. True forgiveness takes time; it's a conscious decision to let the other person off the hook for the wrongs they did to you. It takes time and effort, but given enough of each, the feelings will eventualy follow.
***
I'm not going to elaborate, this post just leaves a bad taste in my mouth, while none of the others have. Apparently you did not even read what I wrote.
I like what Karl said.
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dougs510
Social climber
down south
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Mar 12, 2009 - 12:22am PT
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Good luck Friday Dirt... have peace man.
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up2top
Big Wall climber
Phoenix, AZ
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Mar 12, 2009 - 02:05am PT
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Cancer is sinister. I can only imagine the suffering you've endured. I'm sorry that you're going through this, Curt. I don't have any profound wisdom to offer, but I wanted to let you know I'm thinking of you.
Ed
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nita
climber
chica from chico, I don't claim to be a daisy
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Mar 12, 2009 - 03:41am PT
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Dirt,Buena Suerte!...Donde hay vida,hay esperanza.
xo...n.t.
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dougs510
Social climber
down south
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Mar 13, 2009 - 02:42am PT
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Bump for the dirt man.... tomorrows the day... send positive thoughts, prayers, mantras or whatever else you may think will heal...Personally, I believe in the power of Jesus of Nazareth. Although, when I asked for healing in my back, it got worse, I still hold the believe strong. Dirt, no offence, but I couldn't live w/ myself if I didn't mention the saving grace of JC....
John 3:16
Who believes in Him (JC) shall not perish but have everlasting life.
It's not what I say, it's what God says...
Best to you bro,
doug
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Mungeclimber
Trad climber
sorry, just posting out loud.
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Mar 13, 2009 - 03:37am PT
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Been avoiding this thread without realizing it. I didn't want to read anything bad. But turns out it's all good vibes here.
Easy Redpoint for you Curt. Stick the crux. You'll fire it.
You got enough reading material to keep you busy? I've got a brand new Colorado 14'r book here, and I think you are closer to those mtns than I. Ping me on email if that's something you're into. It's that or a copy of playboy. ;)
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healyje
Trad climber
Portland, Oregon
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Mar 13, 2009 - 04:15am PT
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Dirt, you might get the duct removed or unblocked, but I have my doubts it's going to remove the healthy dose of bile that's part of your on-line signature. He-he, don't be all up and suddenly goin' soft on us.
Hang in there man - hoping today goes well for you...
-Joseph
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dirtineye
Trad climber
the south
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Mar 13, 2009 - 11:06am PT
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no ontention of going soft! Wish me luck.
herhe we go....
and tanks for everything ST folks.
I'm stunned at teh outpouring of concern.
means a lot to me.
back on st night maybe, or sunday.
hopefully feeling mUCH better.
Curt
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scuffy b
climber
just below the San Andreas
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Mar 13, 2009 - 12:54pm PT
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Pleasant Dreams, Curt.
See you Monday (here)
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Zander
Trad climber
Berkeley
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Mar 13, 2009 - 04:22pm PT
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Good luck dirt!
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RRK
Trad climber
Talladega, Al
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Mar 13, 2009 - 09:57pm PT
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just heard from Dirt and things did not go well. The surgeon got to the right spot but could not continue due to inflamed tissue. They may be able to adjust the drain later but will not be able to put in the stent. Time to back up and regroup. He'll be home tomorrow and will fill in the gaps.
RRK
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Jaybro
Social climber
wuz real!
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Mar 13, 2009 - 10:27pm PT
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good vibes your way, Dirt!
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neebee
Social climber
calif/texas
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Mar 13, 2009 - 10:37pm PT
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hey there dirt and all.. say, i missed some news here and will have to back-track... hope you are feeling okay when you get home, dirtineye....
still have been praying, though... welcome back home, as folks said you would be home on monday?
god bless...
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neebee
Social climber
calif/texas
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Mar 13, 2009 - 10:43pm PT
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hey there rrk... say, now i see what was up.... say, if the inflamation goes down, perhaps can they still do this?
well, we could be praying... just never know...
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dirtineye
Trad climber
the south
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Mar 15, 2009 - 01:53am PT
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feel terrible will write more later... new thoguhts from the doc who tried the stint.. he HATES to fail, best person for this stuff in a med center town.. he's already come up with two new ideas.... swear he was as dissapointed as I was when the stint would not go-- I could see it in his face. the man is brilliant too... and has a lot of concern for his patients.
Meanwhile, I HURT, DOH! the damned tube seems to be blocked again, trying to milk it out, we'll see.
And, unfortunately, I can feel the end coming. funny how as it gets closer, I get calmer... not what I'd expect.
damnit all my religious nutjob friends, pray harder!!!
Who lives in sacramento and sent a card signed fellow super topo denizen? My guess is lynne, but I don't know.
Please put you NAME on cards, lOL.
Word for that day is, OWWWW!
thanks again for all the niceness sent my way.
Curt.
PS did not sleep a wink in hospital firday night. I thnk bad news makes me wan t to live every second or something-- I can sleep when I'm dead, or something.
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Jello
Social climber
No Ut
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Mar 15, 2009 - 02:07am PT
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Dirt-Man, I was sort of waiting up to see if you'd post. Sorry to hear the stint didn't work. But keep milking that drain long enough to give the good Doc time to think up and apply new magic. Really, really sorry you're hurtin' so much.
Much love, brother.
-Jeff
EDIT: but don't suffer too much just for us...go freely and with our best thoughts and wishes when you feel the need...you've made your mark in our hearts and minds already...
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nita
climber
chica from chico, I don't claim to be a daisy
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Mar 15, 2009 - 02:11am PT
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Dirt, I hate to think about you in pain....
Fukk Cancer !
Sending good thoughts, a hug & some prayers
sweet dreams , xo ..nita
ps, Lynne lives in Southern cal.
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Karl Baba
Trad climber
Yosemite, Ca
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Mar 15, 2009 - 07:27am PT
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Dirt wrote
"damnit all my religious nutjob friends, pray harder!!! "
Eye Captin' I'm given her all I got!!!!
I've seen that people know inside what's up and what's to come. That's good cause it let's you make your peace and feel that what's to come is not pain but release and renewal.
However, and whenever it shakes out, you've done a courageous and noble dance with us here on the titanic deck.
A heartfelt salute and you're lucky I'm not there to hug you.
Peace
Karl
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neebee
Social climber
calif/texas
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Mar 16, 2009 - 03:05am PT
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hey there dirt/curt...just checking in to see if you'd posted.... welcome back home...
say, just... will be praying... have no job, so i can pray for days on end now, for a bit... :)
say, prayer work in more ways than one, too... so if they seem to fail, they are working for you in ways you just dont SEE yet....
god bless... say, step out under the stars and have a little talk with jesus, when you get a chance...
or even tap him on the ol shoulder when your hunkered down in the pillows for the night...
meant it all very kindly, dear sir... :)
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Karl Baba
Trad climber
Yosemite, Ca
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Mar 16, 2009 - 01:25pm PT
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Keeping the Dirty Flame lit out here in the hinterlands.
Salute
Baba
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survival
Big Wall climber
A Token of My Extreme
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Mar 16, 2009 - 01:37pm PT
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Curt, it is so good to hear that you are not afraid.
I'm sorry that there is pain too.
Be at peace in every way that you can.
Supertopo is thinking of you, and hoping for any miracle or pain free moment that we can get.
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JuanDeFuca
Big Wall climber
Stoney Point
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Mar 16, 2009 - 02:34pm PT
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Dirt,
Sorry you are suffering. You are on my prayer list and I think and pray for you often.
Good Luck.
Juan
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nature
climber
Tucson, AZ
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Mar 17, 2009 - 12:28am PT
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bump....
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Jaybro
Social climber
wuz real!
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Mar 17, 2009 - 12:50am PT
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random acts of kindness...
hang in there Dirt, you have fought the good fight.
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dirtineye
Trad climber
the south
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Mar 17, 2009 - 03:51am PT
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thank you all, again, so much. this site has become a big help, I never expected that. Dick Lugar, I sad don't embarrass me, LOL!!! too much!!! thanks y0ough, I guess your evaluation of the work made me realize something I never really thought about, so, thanks again.
TR, it meas a LOT more to know it came frome you, really. I hope you will wind up where you want to be one day soon. You deserve it. Meanwhile, are you any good with Vanagons, 91 model carot?
WIll try to write more later, over did it today, in fact, first good day in a while, but now i'm paying for it, haha.
HEy, I can DRINK WATER AGAIN!! first time in a long time that water has been good to me, and I (pre cancer as in, three or almost 4 years ago now) used to LOVE water! a silver lining of sorts.
Lately I've bee nmaking death jokes, if any turn out really funny and nnot just morbid, I'll post em. you GOTTA enjoy this, else cry all the time. and as for fighting, ywah, I fight, but denying or ignoreing pain I have reacently learned is a bad thing to do. turns out your body just does some other thing, that can be lashing out at peopl;e or being agitated or shallow rapid breathing, and several other things I forget. Since I have been taking the hospice nurses advice, I've been lot easier to gegt along wth (damn it) and it's better for my parents, who are really too old to go though this, and it's killing them almost as much as it's killing me.
Like the t-shirt says, (someone gave me one) cancer sucks. well actually it's worse than that, as I've ahd a LOT of blow jobs that were better than cancer by far.
Bye now.
PS Karl, thanks man, you are a hoot!
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Dick_Lugar
Trad climber
Indiana (the other Mideast)
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Mar 17, 2009 - 07:31am PT
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Curt-There's an upbeat tone in your voice...that's good to hear. Been holding my breath the last couple days, good to see you writing again. I see you got my reimbursement for your CD. I thought at the least, you could buy lunch for at least a couple friends or family members.
Water...I can't even imagine not being able to drink water. What a great gift to be able to do that again. That's great to hear Curt...take care.
Frank
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Zander
Trad climber
Berkeley
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Mar 17, 2009 - 03:12pm PT
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Dirt, I misread a line of your post above. I read;
"Since I have been taking the hospice nurses aside, I've been lot easier to get along with"
I'm thinking for a minute, "Whoa this could be interesting"!
All the best,
Zander
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neebee
Social climber
calif/texas
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Mar 17, 2009 - 04:21pm PT
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hey there dirt... wow, you can drink water... folks really dont always understand how wonderful that can be!...
say, very happy to hear that bit of joy, is yours, now, dirt...
more god blesses, to you... :)
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scuffy b
climber
just below the San Andreas
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Mar 18, 2009 - 04:28pm PT
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Thanks for posting up, Dirt.
It makes ME feel a lot better to be reading you again.
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Off White
climber
Tenino, WA
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Mar 18, 2009 - 04:41pm PT
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Reading through your travails with your attitude still intact, somehow this old Weird Al song, I'll Be Mellow When I'm Dead popped into my head:
Youtube link: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=LW4ih5Hdtf4
Lyrics:
I don't care about your karma
I don't care about what's hip
No space cadet's gonna tell me what to do
I won't swim in your Jacuzzi
You can't make me settle down
I'd rather kick and jump and bite and scratch
And scream until I'm blue
I may as well be hyper
As long as I'm still around
'Cause I'll have lots of time to be laid back
When I'm six feet under ground
I'll be mellow when I'm dead (I'll be mellow when I'm dead)
x6
When are you
Cosmic cowboys
Gonna get it through your head
I'll be mellow when I'm dead (I'll be mellow when I'm dead)
I'll be mellow when I'm dead (I'll be mellow when I'm dead)
I'll be mellow when I'm dead (I'll be mellow when I'm dead)
I can't stand the smell of incense
I don't really like to jog
No Joni Mitchell eight-tracks in my car (ooh)
I hate anything organic
Even health food makes me sick
You won't catch me sipping Perrier
Down in some sushi bar
I tell you, now's the time to go for
All the gusto you can grab
You'll have plenty of time to be low key
When you're laid out on the slab
I'll be mellow when I'm dead (I'll be mellow when I'm dead)
I'll be mellow when I'm dead (I'll be mellow when I'm dead)
I'll be mellow when I'm dead (I'll be mellow when I'm dead)
I'll be mellow when I'm dead (I'll be mellow when I'm dead)
I'll be mellow when I'm dead (I'll be mellow when I'm dead)
I'll be mellow when I'm dead (I'll be mellow when I'm dead)
When are you
Cosmic cowboys
Gonna get it through your head
I'll be mellow when I'm dead (I'll be mellow when I'm dead)
I'll be mellow when I'm dead (I'll be mellow when I'm dead)
I'll be mellow when I'm dead (I'll be mellow when I'm dead)
I'll be mellow when I'm dead (I'll be mellow when I'm dead)
I'll be mellow when I'm dead (I'll be mellow when I'm dead)
I'll be mellow when I'm dead (I'll be mellow when I'm dead)
I don't want no part of that vegetarian scene
I won't buy me a pair of designer jeans
No redwood hot tub to my name
I got all that I want
And if it's all the same to you
I don't need a course in self-awareness
To find out who I am
And I'd rather have a
Big Mac or a Jumbo Jack
Than all the bean sprouts in Japan
So don't ask me what I'm into
I don't need to prove I'm cool
I'll break your arm
If you ask me what's my sign
I won't tell you where my head's at
I don't need to see no shrink
Psychosis may be in this year
But I'm really not that kind
And I'm in no hurry to be casual
In fact I think I'll wait
Until I'm pushing up the daisies
(Like, wow, man, can you relate)
I'll be mellow when I'm dead (I'll be mellow when I'm dead)
I'll be mellow when I'm dead (I'll be mellow when I'm dead)
I'll be mellow when I'm dead (I'll be mellow when I'm dead)
etc...
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Mighty Hiker
Social climber
Vancouver, B.C.
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Mar 21, 2009 - 05:32pm PT
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I wonder how the dirtster is doing today? Apart from peeing in lexan bottles, that is.
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dirtineye
Trad climber
the south
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Mar 22, 2009 - 02:29am PT
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hahaha, anders, I am not the lexan pee bottle man, tpo be honest, I never thought of it, and the fact taht the lid is wide mouthed and seals makes those lexan bottles perfect urinals.
But since you asked, I'm doing OK after a 24 hour period of drain tube blockage, which is quite annoying, disconcerting, and downright scary, not to mention, it hurts a lot.
IN fact the damned thing still hurts, still feels like back up pressure or the begining of infection, so, not out of woods yet. damned thing had gotten infected twice, and it's miserable, partly bacuase it hurts and partly because Hospice does not pay for antibiotics, ever, so it xosts me 100 bucks for 7 days lvaquin, thanks tpo GWB and the rethuglicans passing that pile of shyte drug bill in 05, and W overriding the democrat attempt to change the idiotic paragrah that drug companies asked for and got that makes it illegal for madecare and medicad ( the two largest medical insurers in the country) to negotiat prices on drugs-- although EVERY OTHER INSURWANCE COMPANY DOES negotiate price, because it just makes sense. Too much sense for rethuglican shill of business though, god damn them all to hell.
But anyway, I'm not sure what to do with this thread any more. as long as poeple respond or ask questions, I will answer, but I feel funny about just posting 'trip reports unbidden, so, leet me know what you want. I was ttally umprepared for the overwhelming response s from ST members and shocked that many people like to read what I write. BUt if you want, I'll do it as long as I can, whcih unfortunately may not be much longer. they put you in hospice for a reason-- death is close. Oh well, that's life.
I want to say again how gratifying it is for me to know that some have benefited from my cancer threads and taken action for screening. That at least makes me feel like I've done something good and that this way too early death is not meaningless.
I am also happy that most people seem to think I tell the truth, which is extremely important to anyone with a math background, and I at one time was a pretty good math guy, at least when it got to logic nad theeory and away from arithmetic and stuff. I still can't add and subtract nubers very well, LOL. One time I had this cal 4 test where I did everythign right, solved every problem correctly, understood the material very well, but I got an 87 insttead of a 95-100 because in 5 places I did things in the final tally like adding 9 and 7 and somehow getting 15 or 17 or anything but the right answer. talk about chagrin. I just spaz on simple arithmetic, haha.
Did stuff in advanced calc proofs that amazed the profs-- they remembered it ten years later-- but I can't add and subtract, LOL too funny. Too bad I made some bad choices in the early 90s, and by the time I did take their free ride to grad school, chemo and anti depressants and time had all taken thier toll and it was just too late. wouldn't be so bad if I had not wasted 9 years and given up everything to be with a type a alcoholic mega-b1tch, but again, that's life.
Let that be the thought for the day from dirt: if something is really bad, get out soon, don't waste your life staying. Life is short, and it's good to make the best of it.
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Karl Baba
Trad climber
Yosemite, Ca
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Mar 22, 2009 - 02:43am PT
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Hey DirtBro
Thanks for the update. Keep em coming. We're listening.
You could send me an email or post up here if you get stuck on that forgiveness thing. Wondering if you got any juice from it but didn't want to press you.
Thanks for keeping it real
Much love
Baba
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Mimi
climber
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Mar 22, 2009 - 02:47am PT
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Hello Curt. Really sorry you're in such a state. It doesn't even bother me when you say those things about the previous administration. LOL! Meaningless stuff when compared to what you're going through.
Where do you want your spirit or energy to go when you pass? Have you thought of that much? If you've written about it already, I missed seeing it.
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dirtineye
Trad climber
the south
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Mar 22, 2009 - 03:36pm PT
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thnaks to all those above Imissed, last few days have bee nroguh.
Karl, I am stuck for the moment, but things seem to be working out. I have a feeling it will all come out OK before the end. something about approaching death makes you want things to be OK, ans the less important things fall away. you'd be suprized what falls away.
recently I had a changes of heart about getting too decrepit to do anyting and pulling my own plug while still able.
I recalled my almost death with the monoclonal antibody reaction ( which is partly thanks to GWB banning stem cell research Mimi-- a mouse protein has killed some and almost got me, with all human cells that woudl not happen.)
but anyway, the point is that in the so close it was almost curtains event, things did not go as you might think. even though I knew I was dying, it did not hurt, there was no panic or worry-- no it was really calm and I just had this little conversation with myself, like, too bad I didn't see my parents again, that's bad. too bad I ddin't finish the music, that's bad. but I did get to see DR larson again, I like her, that's good... and as it got a lot worse and I was realy out o body Ia little voice (mine) said Try not to die then, and I said OK I'll try, and then the frantically pushed in several times over crash cart drugs worked and I was coming back.
I discussed this wit ha friend who had a similar experience wiht a surgery, and he said, after that happened I was not afraid of death anymore, and I said me too, but I'm not in a hurry to do it again, and we laughted.
BUt it was an interesting experience, and I think as long as there won;t be a lot of misery attached, I will just ride it out and see what happens, which I would not get to do with a self inflicted violent sudden death. so I guess that's out. woulda made a big mess anyway.
Death is not so bad, there are things a lot worse than death-- I've had to endure a lot of em!! some chemo is worse than death especially when it does not a bit of good, and all yo ucan do is wish you were dead, it makes you so miserable for weeks and weeks.
having your true love dump you in a rather mean way right when you need em the most is almost worse than death, it sure hurt more, but you can at least get over that in time. I guess you cna get over just about anything with enough time as long as you don't do anything permanently stupid.
Oh well, one other thing that botheres me is, my poker playing SUCKS right now!!! LOL too many drugs! too many undisciplined moves. too many suckouts!!! heart is not in it either. I gotta ask Barry Greenstein if he would give me a good talking to LOL.
A friend got him to call me, I was blown away. the man is really a nice guy. probably in the top 30-50 in the world, took teh time to call me. I hope I was not too drugged up to make any sense, LOL.
Damnit I 'd really have this perfect life if I didn;t hvae terminal cancer. COmeon all my religious nutjob pals, pray harder!!!!!
Curt
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Jello
Social climber
No Ut
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Mar 22, 2009 - 06:19pm PT
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Hey, Dirt-friend, thanks for the call yesterday. Sorry I haven't called back yet, but I'm still working to defeat the respiratory infection I've been fighting ever since I came back from visiting you two weeks ago. Trying to talk really ends up in a coughing fit.
As far as that pee-bottle goes, although I only used it a few times while I was there, I only rinsed it out and didn't wash it with soap, so it probably still exudes a certain "essence of el Jeffe". I don't think it's going to bring you much at open auction!
One thing I have to mention that I'm very happy for you for, is the fact you have such wonderful parents. I really enjoyed getting to know Sally and Jim (I kind of wonder how two such kind and generous folks produced such an irrascible curmudgeon as you, though, hahaha!). I know this is a difficult time for them, but also I felt how much good comes back to them for loving you through all this. In a somewhat similar but less acute, fashion, my visiting you is already returning far more positive energy to me, than it took from me to make the trip.
You are one interesting and worthwhile individual, mi amigo. Stay open to miracles - they do happen - but I'm glad you're at peace with the inevitable outcome that we all face: none of us is going to get out of this life alive!
-JelloFriend
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dirtineye
Trad climber
the south
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Mar 22, 2009 - 10:22pm PT
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Lois, haha yes that dick and jane updates was pretty damned funny! I can be pretty good once in a while I must say.
And I DO have a lot of republican friends, misguided though they are, and sadly, tehy still think it is teh party of , dole, eisenhower, adn other good moderate conservatives who were willing to work to do things liek pass the clean ari adn water act.
Unfortunately the hard liners who got control adn totally messed up the party, but a lot still don't know or can't believe it-- adn what they have done.
But anyway, thanks Lois.
ANdthenon to Jeff, teh lexan pee man, hehe.
I am so sorry you got sick on the plane. UGH I hate that aspect of flying. hope you do get better soon.
If I can I'll be out for a visit, and the bad litle mormon girl lives just 4 hours away, so maybe we can get her to party wiht two half past dead guys, LOL.
Truly Jeff, you were again the nicest person I thin kI ever met, that taht includes a lot of nice people. To have done so much, you of all people woudl be entitled to the "Big Head" syndrome that afflicts some top climbers adn indeed it happens in every walk of life-- but that attitude never does anyone any good, and you just don';t seem to care about your accomplishments at all, rahter, you are just a decent friendly guy that anyone woudl be proud to call their friend. I don;t think there is any higher accolade to give than that.
So happy we got to meet again and so sorry you and I are in the shitter, when we shoulc be climbing stuff together. of course you'd have to drag me up a few things LOL! and cold? FORGET COLD!! I used to contemplate moutaineering, had a little of the clothign already, had teh friends who are avid mountaineers, had an in with Brad Johnson in the cordillera blanca, but then I was reading boorkreve's book about everest 96, and got to the part wher ehe said " it was 40 below last night", and I thought to myself, hmmmm I can't stand 40 above, what am I going to do at 40 below???? and right there I knew mountaineering was NOT for me, hahaha!
Anyway, if all goes well we will meet again BEFORE death intervenes, and I'm sure it will be a blast.
My family really enjoyed your company. I had told them to prepare to meet one of the nicest people ever, and they agreed that you were indded just that.
Later,
Curt
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Curt
Boulder climber
Gilbert, AZ
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Mar 22, 2009 - 10:53pm PT
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Hey Curt,
I don't post all that often over here at ST, and hence somehow missed this thread. It was great meeting you out at JT and comparing notes over the years on various single malt beverages. I'm glad you liked the Edradour. I'm terribly sorry to hear this news because last time we spoke, you were doing pretty well, as I recall. You certainly have Lisa's and my best wishes.
The other "Curt"
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ontos
Boulder climber
Washington DC
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Mar 22, 2009 - 11:26pm PT
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Dirt,
I just lurk here, but have been following your situation. You're a hell of a guy; I wish you all the best and most of all that you can keep your sense of humor. Without that we aren't much. This life can be damn hard, but if we can still smile in the face of troubles, it's not nearly so hard.
Best,
Patrick
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Karl Baba
Trad climber
Yosemite, Ca
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Mar 23, 2009 - 12:19am PT
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""irrascible curmudgeon""
Oh say it isn't so!!??
;-)
"having your true love dump you in a rather mean way right when you need em the most is almost worse than death, it sure hurt more, but you can at least get over that in time. I guess you cna get over just about anything with enough time as long as you don't do anything permanently stupid."
I know what you're saying here but that's what makes it the most powerful opportunity for inner medicine. Forgiving that would mean choosing Love over all else.
Choosing Love like that is the most powerful medicine for Life or Death that there is. Having a big pill to swallow makes the magic work. Happily and sadly, I've taken this medicine myself. It's only the first big gulp that's tough and then you feel high, high, high.
And we could debate all day about God or no God, but Love itself is what really moves us. Choosing it over any negativity completely purges the heart and then you can face anything.
I've never liked fire and brimstone talk, but you want to avoid hell just in case, cause you know it's loaded with Republicans ;-)
Anyway, I hope you'll forgive my little sermon for starters as I keep the Dirt candle burning here on Supertopo.
Much Love
Baba
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dougs510
Social climber
down south
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Mar 23, 2009 - 01:36am PT
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Hi Curt,
Hope your pain is easing and your finding peace this evening. I thought I'd share an experience I had today which might help us all find some comfort with this situation your currently in, but we all eventually find.
My parents passed away 7 years ago, and I frequently go to the graveyard to visit and talk. It has helped me find peace. Today, I laid where my spot is, next to my Dad, and close my eyes. I'll tell you what, he sure knew how to pick a cool spot, because it is the most PEACEFUL thing to lie there next to him, with my Mom and Brother a couple of spots over. I think I'll get the spots next to me for my Daughters.
Anyhow, I'm not really sure how this fits in, but I just wanted to share because if death is anything like the peace I felt today, it will be a really good experience for all of us.
Stay in touch brother,
Doug
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neebee
Social climber
calif/texas
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Mar 23, 2009 - 04:55am PT
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hey there ol' dirtineye, curt... say, i always try to check in... hmmm, i reckon i am being too polite, waiting for you to post...
say, i will chat when ever you post up...
i have had my own hard time, just due to no work is all... but i am used to that... i go with out food a lot more and give it to my critters...
so at times, i end up being kind of tired... ahaha... ..
well, i am enjoying my new pup-dog, she is wroking out really good... a really good pup... 8 months.. but kind of big, i reckon.. part lab and part sharpei... she wrinkles up her face really funny!...
well, since i dont hve the work, i ahve been fixing my book edits more and more..
hard at tiesm , as i type all backwards and have to fix it... i am too tired to fix it all now.. :)
say, i was hoping that perahps you geetting fresh good ol water, maybe you'd be feeling better... soryy that the pain is still there...
in the long run, it is best when one knows their time is around the bend, as you have noticed, you learn how to 'walk the road'... but it is still sad to leave folks you love... one must remember, while praying, that there is a HOST of a lot more folks to love and relate to, in another rhelme...
may you have good days these weeks... i am still praying.. so god is moving, curt... we just dont know what his plan is for your 'tilling your field' ... but i pray that the timeing is not bad, and that the fruits of all your days, will be wonderful fruit that you can be so proud of...
sending my love and say, jello says you got neat paretnts.. aww, dirt, that is wonderf...
l;ove, from ol neebee...
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Norwegian
Trad climber
Placerville, California
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Mar 23, 2009 - 11:48am PT
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hope your thriving.
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dirtineye
Trad climber
the south
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Mar 24, 2009 - 06:18am PT
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Karl wrote:
"And we could debate all day about God or no God, but Love itself is what really moves us. Choosing it over any negativity completely purges the heart and then you can face anything. "
Wel gee karl, yeah I think you have something there.
I said before as death gets closer it gets easier to be less negative and more forgiving... except for rethuglican shills of course...
But really Karl, when did you take such an interest in me? took me by suprise it did. not that I mind or would complain. I do admire your work and a good bit of your thinking.
Neebster, thanks so much for all teh sappy support. the world needs more sap. sappy is a wrongheaded way to say good and kind I think, created by people who were uncomfortable with the honest truth...
Doug, why don't you come down for a visit? or come to the BSF on the 30, 1,2,3 of maay? If at all able I will be there. not good for anything but sitting in cap haha, but I'll be there along with a few pals and Mr Noffsinger.
Other curt, yeah I really enjoyed meeting you at Jtree, have to say the tip on edradour was stellar. wish we could meet again. you are one of these really nice guys who seem to abound in climbing, along with all those escapees from teh mental hospitals.
Ontos and norwegian, thanks for your kind thoughts. they all help.
We planted lettuce adn onions in oour new compost today, man it looks great!!!!!!! After 30 years, I almost have my parent's veg/flower garden how it was supposed to be, LOL. yeah I procrastinate. Besides it had to evolve or something.
IF your city has a compost project, use it. if they don't try to get one started--cause the city of mntn brook MAKES money on stuff they woudl haveto throw in landfill or burn or something, but they turn it into compost for almost free and sell every bit every year, and get this, OTHER cities in teh area PAY to haul thier leave to MB for composting instead of doing it themselves becasu3 they think it COSTS money to have such a program. Hmmmmmmm...
that's one public works project with nothing but benefit all round, and green as can be, adn teh end product takes what's seen as waste adn makes it valuable and useful. I don't see why ANYONE disposes of leaves or burns em, when this is a proven money maker.
165 bucks for 9 cubic yards delivered, hard to beat that. can't wait to see yhow it does!
Curt
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neebee
Social climber
calif/texas
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Mar 24, 2009 - 09:03am PT
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hey there ol' dirtineye... say, i'll take sappy, sounds good to me... anything from tree, has good stable roots of being an honorable thing to be called... say, sap even sticks and follows one allllll day long... and it, when you try to ignore it, why it glistens in the sun and catches your attention...
heehee... :)
welll, now, say... as to the garden and compost, dirt (dirt, meaning i am addressing you by name, not mentioning the "soil"), well, my mom taught me to do compost.. and i love to garden..
have no time or money or place to plant at now... but someday again i will...
love to hear about the garden... thanks for the share...
say, dirt, have you ever seen the urban stink-fungus (forgot its name, i will post it later)... my mom found it one day in her compost for the flowers, not the garden...
it was so freaky looking, she had us all check it out... (smells and attracks flies)... there was a post here at supertop about it, too...
red, and looks like a starfish on a small stalk...
well, all for now.. i been up alllllll night... and i am cold and tired...
god bless dirt, have some enjoyment tomorrow, in the yard, and the greatoutdoors... and when you go past a mirror, no matter how much the day may hurt:
SMILE at yourself and love yourself.... 'cause:
someone "sappy" is "rooting" for you!
god bless!
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Karl Baba
Trad climber
Yosemite, Ca
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Mar 24, 2009 - 09:57am PT
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The Dirt Says
"I said before as death gets closer it gets easier to be less negative and more forgiving... except for rethuglican shills of course...
But really Karl, when did you take such an interest in me? took me by suprise it did. not that I mind or would complain. I do admire your work and a good bit of your thinking."
Maybe it's a mystery, but if I have to put concepts to it, think of it like this:
Imagine you are a climber relaxing at the pub one night and you hear a brother climber is stuck suffering on some epic without the right gear. If you think you are in a position to help, if you have an inkling that the bro is doing his best to hang on until the story plays out, then perhaps you're inspired to grab some gear and a few other bros and head out and see what can be done. You care.
And as much as the subject of spirituality and healing the wounds of the heart is regarded by many as uncharted territory, there are those of us who know within ourselves that we have a good idea how to help the comrade get through the storm.
I have no desire to be or seem patronizing, but simply feel it within me to stand by you.
"Neebster, thanks so much for all teh sappy support. the world needs more sap. sappy is a wrongheaded way to say good and kind I think, created by people who were uncomfortable with the honest truth..."
That's a fine insight Dirt. This is a parallel truth to the lack of forgiveness of others and ourselves that separates us for inner peace. We are unconfortable with the vulnerability that comes with caring and love so we call it "Sappy" and make ourselves just a little more cold.
Even those with nothing to lose can make the mistake of hanging on to the safety of numbness.
I'm glad that you are looking at those choices and eyeing making a heroic exit that leaves the pettiness behind.
Much love
Baba
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dirtineye
Trad climber
the south
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Mar 24, 2009 - 06:58pm PT
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Karl, I never thought you were being patronizing or condescending. thanks for all your thoughts nad helpful insights.
Neebster, keep teh sap flowing, by all means.
Lois, Compsot os MUCH better than soil, no matter what sort of sol it is. adn that prices was delivery included, so, it's better than anything excpt free elephant maure from teh zo, and since the zoo does not give that stuff away any more ( botanical gardens takes it all) the only other way is making your own compost, and we need to cover 50' x 70' every years about 6-8 inches deep, and even with all our leaves and everything else, there's no way we have that much.
Now in your situation, here's what I would do: get yourself some pygmy elephants from borneo, at least three, and potty train them to dump where needed. I figure you ahve enough acreage to give em room to do thier thing and be happy, and the only drawback wil lbe you need a serious fence, but you would stop bambi with the same fence, so, it's a deal even thoguh the elephant proof fence would be expensive. at least your trees and veggies will be safe, unless your elephannts decide it's THIER garden, haha.
But as the elephant is the rethuglican symbol, I am you you will feel somewhat obligated to offer a few refugees a home.
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Ottawa Doug
Social climber
Ottawa, Canada
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Mar 24, 2009 - 09:26pm PT
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Dirt, Karl, Neebee, Dougs5:10, Norwegian, LEB....you are all good people writing heartfelt,great stuff. Thanks from Ottawa Doug the 'lurker' here.
Best wishes to all.
Doug
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Mighty Hiker
Social climber
Vancouver, B.C.
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Mar 24, 2009 - 10:24pm PT
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Well, Curt, I hope you're doing as well as might be. Here's a garden/compost story for you.
My mother was an elementary school librarian, and a fanatic gardener. After she retired, she got quite involved in gardening groups, and eventually worm composting. She started giving talks for the city and the gardeners on worm composting, and as part of it dressed up in a costume as "The Red Wriggler". Very entertaining, as she liked story telling.
As we said, you can take the teacher out of the school, but...
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neebee
Social climber
calif/texas
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Mar 25, 2009 - 12:01am PT
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hey there say, dirt, as to compost... i am hot of the trail of the fungus picture.. i will be right back... with the link...
also---this is a fringe benefit of compost that just CANT be beat!....
after my first few days of compost in my itty bitty place that i used to rent near the edge of some woods... i took a nice morning peek out of my window andddddddddddddddddddd
my ol' compost pile was full of wonderful TURKEYS!...
WOW, THEY WERE HAVING a regular breakfast-style picnic...
sure was wonderful to see them, being that in calif, where i was after my divorce (after texas, which was even after calif, originally), i was in the city and saw none such great fun!
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neebee
Social climber
calif/texas
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Mar 25, 2009 - 12:13am PT
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hey there dirt... okay here it is... found in her flower garden mulch, not her compost/veg pile, in back...
here is the link and it actually started in austrailia they said, but this is what she found, it now is in n. calif, too.:
http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Asero%C3%AB_rubra
say, dirtineye, say, not only do you do music, but i am happy to enjoy your garden stuff...
hope you had some kind of a nice day, outside... say, as spring will be coming, how IS it down there where you are... it is near spring-like yet or not.... ?
up here, it sure aint ... but i think my mom has had some nice days, but she is in san jose... calif...
lastly,
hey there, say, doug the lurker... say, nice to hear from you... we, in turn, are being the happy recipricants of dirt's garden share now....
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Karl Baba
Trad climber
Yosemite, Ca
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Mar 25, 2009 - 12:27am PT
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Who would have guessed that Dirt actually had such expertise in ..well..Dirt!
Literally and figuratively, "Dirt!"
It's not just a 4 letter word.
He even speaks good "LEB"
which goes to show the power of good medication
;-)
Karl
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Mighty Hiker
Social climber
Vancouver, B.C.
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Mar 25, 2009 - 02:25am PT
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As my parents live in the city, they could compost all they wanted and not have enough to satisfy my mother's gardening ambitions. And there are no elephants (or wolves) in this area. So every spring she would enlist us to turn and spread the compost heap, and when it proved insufficient, buy steer manure from the scouts - they had an annual sale, where they'd truck in heaps of it, and sell it by the bag.
Then, when the city instituted a composting program, she'd get us to drive there and fill the back of the car with bags full of it. Gardeners definitely are different people.
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dougs510
Social climber
down south
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Mar 25, 2009 - 02:38am PT
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OK Curt... I'll be there. I'll bring a bottle of the good stuff and we'll discuss all the stuff we did and dreamed about doing.
Looking forward to it... I'll drop an email before now and then.
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neebee
Social climber
calif/texas
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Mar 26, 2009 - 03:30am PT
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hey there ... happy eve to you, dirtineye... bump for you...
say, i got to go sleep soon... :)
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neebee
Social climber
calif/texas
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Mar 26, 2009 - 03:37am PT
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hey there dirtineye... say, come morning here is a nice view for you:
from old times back... (you saw it in the my climbing skills report) but here it is again, just for you....
from lassen, from a trail through the backtrees, etc...
say, volcanic soil, sure grew a great "garden" here, huh?
HERE IT IS:
god bless... say, i just said some nighttime prayers for you, too.... take care... and have a much better morning, if you are still huring now...
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darod
Big Wall climber
South Side Billburg
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Mar 26, 2009 - 08:22am PT
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hey dirt, I check on this thread daily. You're in my thoughts constantly and I'm happy to see you're managing well enough.
keep up the fight!
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dirtineye
Trad climber
the south
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Mar 26, 2009 - 08:43am PT
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am I still hurting?
the answer is, YES, now I need a remedy in the worst way.
Neebster, let's talk. At first, I thought, OK, another religious whackjob.
But you are sincere. I respect that. I can even admire your conviction.
SO, thanks neeb.
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divad
Trad climber
wmass
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Mar 26, 2009 - 04:43pm PT
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Hey dirt,
As someone whose contribution to this site has had about the same impact as a single cow fart has on the depletion of the ozone layer, I have often felt your posts to be enlightening and always entertaining. I hope that I get to read many more of them.
All the best,
Dave
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graniteclimber
Trad climber
Nowhere
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Mar 26, 2009 - 04:49pm PT
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"i have had my own hard time, just due to no work is all... but i am used to that... i go with out food a lot more and give it to my critters...
so at times, i end up being kind of tired... ahaha... .."
Neebee, that concerns me. You are short of food?
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dirtineye
Trad climber
the south
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Mar 26, 2009 - 05:26pm PT
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darod and divad, thanks for that. It's nice to know you guys who don't have to make a spectacle of yourselves take the time to tell me you enjoy my rants.
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cintune
climber
the Moon and Antarctica
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Mar 26, 2009 - 05:47pm PT
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Hang tough Curt, don't know you in real life either but been a fan of those rants since the rc.place a few years back. Hoping for the best for you all along as well. And if you do meet God, don't let it off the hook until you get some straight answers, for cryin' out loud, please.
Best regards,
Paul Chrastina
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neebee
Social climber
calif/texas
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Mar 26, 2009 - 07:14pm PT
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hey there granite climber... say, it just works into the ol climbing-skills-of-life, it seems... (as to food situation...)
(been through this before, and am just waiting for new job to appear)...
but say:
i will be okay, as ol' dirtineye has be getting "fruit out of ol words of well-wishes"... and that will in turn keep me well fed, as seed falls from whatever feedback we get here, and then i am well fed, knowing that dirtineye is having a better day, in some way...
;)
say, dirt... now remember, when ever you feel all sappy, and wonder if you need to use one of those after-dinner moister-wipes, just think of me, and PASS the sap on...
:)
say, have a good evening... sure hope you liked the volcanic-soil view... yet, it IS from near about FOURTY years ago!
hmm.. wonder how it looks now... say, dirt, we will have to send out a climber to that ol trail and have them report back...
:)
edit: oopps, dirt, i forgot my manners, as i was just happy to see you post today.... forgot to say "ahh shucks, thanks for saying that" now i just might cry... but i will let settle into your ol' compost-garden for good measure... thanks, dirt...
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charley
Trad climber
nw pa.
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Mar 26, 2009 - 08:16pm PT
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Dirt, I don't post here much and I don't know you except online. I do read this everyday and remmber your rants here and at rc. whatever. I have enjoyed some of your posts and have learnt from others. I am pulling for you and wish you the best. Sending positive vibes your way.
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Mimi
climber
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Mar 26, 2009 - 11:51pm PT
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Hey, Curt. You are so brave. Sorry to hear you're hurting. I found this and thought you might enjoy it.
"Let me not beg for the stilling of my pain but for the heart to conquer it."
~ Rabindranath Tagore (1861-1941), poet, philosopher, first Hindu Nobel laureate.
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dirtineye
Trad climber
the south
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Mar 27, 2009 - 05:05am PT
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neeb, it's true, I get a lot of something special from these kind posters.
Charlie, thanks. glad you got a few laughs.
Cintune, hehe I will do that if things go that way.
Mimi, I'm afraid I am not brave at all. I'm just doing what I have to do. they way I do it does seem to make an impression though, and not just online either. it's a strange feeling to be admired for something I can't help. a lot of high school pals for instance as well as friends of the family are always telling me that I am an inspiration. hell I don't mean to be. If they could see what a wreck I am a lot of the time they might feel differently.
I guess I think anyone would do what I've done, or try to. it's not too hard to rise to the occasion when that's your only choice! seriously, you can either ty to be as happy as you can make yourself, or you can let the misery rule you and what's left of your life. when you look at it that way it's no choice at all-- there's only one way to go, and that is to try to be as happy as possible.
that does not mean I can do it all the time or even come close on some days or even weeks, but you have to keep trying because the alternative is so bad.
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neebee
Social climber
calif/texas
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Mar 28, 2009 - 02:49pm PT
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hey there dirt... say, as you say, one needs to rise to occasion...
say, you know... that is true, as there is many folks in other coutries that are starving and dying slowly and watching their kids, die too.... yet, they press on, slowly day after day...
that is what all of us do in life, we take each day at a time...
some, sadly do see more sorrow than others... but in the long run, we all learn the same lessons...
some times, we learn them on our own and sometimes we learn them form others, or from mentors...
in a sense, you are being a mentor to others... even though it may not seem so, as this is so new, and surely nothing to be desired, that one would love to teach...
say, being that it is NEW for you though... you are being a real trouper, and making the best of your trail, and leaving markers for others... and thus, still inspiring folks...
:)
as some of these folks may face what you are facing, as they age, and you will be making a good trail for them to follow, from you markers as you learn more about yourself and how you face this....
hmmm, hope i explained all that right...
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dirtineye
Trad climber
the south
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Mar 28, 2009 - 07:07pm PT
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well neeb, you still have it wrong as far as I am concerned.
I absolutely did NOT want to 'teach' anything to anyone about life and death. I did NOT want to be any sort of 'guru' or Life to death 'guide' LOL not at all.
My good friend Jim Okel (and aome dipshi!t may well give me hell for saying we were good friends when I knew him for a SHORT time, but as with many other climbers around my age, we just hit it off from the first time we met, and that waa that, we were good friends)who died of cancer about two yours ago (and was a great climber BTW) DID do that, and he was all suited for such things, as he was a practicing zen Buddhist ( OK I can't spell that word but here's what the spell check thinks) and seemed to have a good way with people, and of course he was surrounded by friends who really had an interest in the experience, etc etc.
OK now I kind of got lost, but I think I'm trying to say that I beleive each person should figure this one out for themselves, and really you don't need a guide, or someone to leave trail markers.
Trust me, it's sort of obvious where you go, LOL. And if it's not, then you think it out for yourself, and have yourself an adventure.
Now don't think I'm unhappy that people want to know, that's fine, and it seems I'm doing exactly what I didn't want to do but I am enjoying it because people seem to be getting something out of it.
And don't think I'm mad at you cause it's not worth any bother.
Gotta go!
Curt
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neebee
Social climber
calif/texas
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Mar 28, 2009 - 11:49pm PT
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hey there dirt... awwwww, your're a sweet heart... yeah, i guess i didnt explain it too good...
i didn't mean it as you wanted to be that... but that you were doing a good job at it...
i more meant that you were doing the part of, just rising to the occasion... (i think, if i understood that right, that was the something you wanted to do, just rise up and handle stuff as it come---so that would be how we deal with death too...
correcte me if i'm wrong, as email stuff is hard to say or do at times when its not a voice to voice immedaiate response email...
but-say...
you ARE being you... and YOU are unigue.. so that means however you handle and do this, will be in your best way... (well, unless you were getting to bitter... ) (it would take away all your enegery)...
:) we like the energy you got, as you're keeping a pretty even keel right now... :)
well, guess i messed that 'one catch at third' and let a bad run, slide to home... :)
aww, shucks... well, i'm trying to understand it all, too...
you are speical, dirt, that is the long run of it all, and keep on surfing them ol' waves of this awful thing... and soak in a few glorious rays from the day's sun, as you do...
god bless, and have a good evening... i am babysitting, so i wonte be able to say hi again, until tomorrow...
:)
you better smile,if the birds are singing in the morning, okay... they like a happy audiance ... say, can you whislte... join on it, with them, too... :)
all for now... :)
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Brunosafari
Boulder climber
Redmond, OR
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Mar 28, 2009 - 11:56pm PT
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well said Dirt and Neebee
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jbar
Social climber
Asymptote
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Mar 29, 2009 - 02:05am PT
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I really enjoyed those last few posts.
"it's not too hard to rise to the occasion when that's your only choice" But it is a choice and something you have to accept to do. Kind of like Dirt was saying , a different journey for each person. I think you should be admired for the way you choose to live and for doing a fantastic job of keeping a positive outlook. When it comes to guiding or not I think we all have so many diverse experiences we could share and I'm sure you have much wisdom to impart. We are all travelers.
Reading what you said about chemo brought to mind that scene from "bucket list" where Jack Nicholson looks in the mirror after throwing up and says "some lucky sob is having a heart attack right now". It's a great movie if you have never seen it.
I don't know if I'm a religeous nutjob but I'm certainly praying for you.
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Karl Baba
Trad climber
Yosemite, Ca
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Mar 29, 2009 - 04:36am PT
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""it's not too hard to rise to the occasion when that's your only choice"
Yet lots of people don't do it.
But it's true that sometimes you have to crash your car, or your life, before you loosen up on the self-imposed resistance that only makes you suffer.
That's why this thread could be a helpful wakeup call to those who haven't got pain to help inspire them. Best to rise to the occasion while you have other choices.
As for Dirtman, bumping your thread and hoping your not awake at this time of night to read it yet.
Hope whatever you are going through brings you with grace to wherever you need to be.
Peace
Baba
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dirtineye
Trad climber
the south
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Mar 29, 2009 - 10:39am PT
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I didn't get much sleep, about 4 hours, man that dilaudid wires me up so much taht LOTS of ativan won't knock me out LOL, nad the steroids I had to try didn't help with sleeping either.
Usually that means tonight I'll sleep plenty though. seems like today will be a good day (can't ever really tell lately)
Yeah it isn't hard FOR ME, and lots of people don't do it, so maybe writing stuff like this helps a few of those realize they better get going while it's still an option. I don't know, but the feedback seems positive in th1s vein, so that keeps me posting.
I need to eat some yogurt. drain is working again, but it's clear with no real color and bits of mucus (and it is SUPPOSED TO BE BILE LOL.) but I get told this is all either normal or end of life changes-- haha so how to decide? Who knows. they tell me not to worry about it yet.
Worry is bad, OK, I know that, but still it's really odd to have all these changes going on and no good explanation for them.
Oh well. Harp lady came again this weekend, she's great to listen to, and that's a load of fun.
GOtta go eat.
Curt.
PS Neeb, don't worry about it.
Brno and others, glad you liked it.
Out of posting gas for now, later,
Curt
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neebee
Social climber
calif/texas
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Mar 29, 2009 - 12:57pm PT
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hey there dirt... say, just dropped in to say hey there...
hope the day has some good for dig out of, kind of like hidden treasures...
:)
*let us know if you find something neat that sparkels, today... :)
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Karl Baba
Trad climber
Yosemite, Ca
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Mar 29, 2009 - 01:41pm PT
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"I need to eat some yogurt. drain is working again, but it's clear with no real color and bits of mucus (and it is SUPPOSED TO BE BILE LOL.) but I get told this is all either normal or end of life changes-- haha so how to decide? Who knows. they tell me not to worry about it yet."
We just got back from India. Funny how circumstances can get you comfortable with body fluid talk.
They tell you "Don't worry, just end of life changes..." !!! Too funny. Worry is about uncertainty, don't worry, you're just dying!
Wishing you comfort and happy draining of bile. (Didn't you have too much bile for a long time? ;-)"
Peace
Karl
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jbar
Social climber
Asymptote
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Mar 29, 2009 - 10:18pm PT
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Just went through the meat of this post. Dirt - Nice playing there! You would be a hoot at a ceilidh. I haven't listened to harp in ages but back in the late 80's I went to see Patrick Ball. I was amazed at the beauty of his O'Carolan harp.
There is something special about you musicians and your ability to bring so much beauty to our souls.
I said a prayer to "my" God for you today Dirt. I asked him to give you many blessings and to cast his angels about you to protect you. Today I'm wishing you a rainbow.
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neebee
Social climber
calif/texas
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Mar 29, 2009 - 10:22pm PT
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hey there dirt... wow, now you got sparkles and rainbows, both coming your way...
say, perhaps a nice spring-time rainy day... the good splashy kind, and some of karl's wishes in "draining" too, mixed in too...
say, this is a "springy" day of wishes for you, today!
and perhaps some neat garden sprouts...and some hope for some better days this week, and months to come...
:)
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dirtineye
Trad climber
the south
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Mar 30, 2009 - 12:44am PT
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neeb, I do appreciate all the attention, if you'd like to talk some, you can call my cell. I'll email it to you at the address you used to join this site.
WE probably have some things to say that should be private. I just have a sense that your interest here is probably motivated by your own unfortunately vast experience with tragedy and a lot of that stuff is just not good to get out in public.
HAAH you know about digin, I really don't have to dig. things change, perception changes, I change-- they are just there. they were always there. I just didn't look at em the same way. ZIn fact, I look at em in lots of ways at once.
Maybe we could give each other some pointers.
It's up to you.
Jbar, thanks so much for the music comments. I stopped worrying about what people thoguht ( like/don't like) a long time ago, when I got the ultimate compliment from what I consider an ultimate source, as in, after THAT it didn't matter what anyone else said, ever, LOL, but you know, still I have to confess that there IS that insecurity that goes with extreme creativity that IS always worried, cause that's the nature of the beast, a little unstable in some ways, so, alow me to be totally contracictory and happy with it too, LOL, whihc flies in the face of my math/physica work, but hey the art was there first, and for me, can't have one with out the other, so, I'm a little complicated, and finally have gotten a little used to it and had to accept it, and now I just need the time, hehe, which I might just get enough of if I have a little more luck, but if I don't, well, too bad I fvcked up, and it's sad but only for the reast of you, not for me, cause no matter what I could have done or left behind, it won't matter at all to me when I'm dead. still it is sad not to get this stuff out to those whouse life coould be made a little nice by it, or a little happier, or a little more restful, or whtever they choose.
I hate to say it, but some of life, an important part in fact, is about service to others. HEy I think your post made me crystalize that for the first time in a really good way for me to get it. thanks.
About your god, go right ahead, and thank you for doing it. You don't need my permission, not that I thought you were asking for that. I just accept things like prayer from people I feel are sincere and I don't from the others. I'm afraid I'll make a mess of this if I keep on, I'm getting tired now, and the subject is difficult so I'll just stop there. besides, things got better today, maybe that's your protection and rainbow all in one, who knows? I didn't make it outside thoguh, but it did reain some so there COULD have been a real rainbow I just didn't see it. but I think it got in anyway. Oh dear now I'm getting all mystical and spiritual and I just hate doing that, I have to stop.
Karl,
I really don't know what to say. maybe we should talk on the phone a bit as well.
Hell I'd just post the number right here except it IS the internet and I really don't want all the crap I'd get from those cretins who live to ruin the lives of others, so I'll send the number to your email listed here, and if you like, call. I'm in central time.
As for what you wrote last, well, you DO have a sense of humor I enjoy, you do get a lot that many just miss, and I think I just kind of like you.
haha good one about the comfortable with body fluid talk thing. I lost all that stuffiness a LONG time ago, and I am usually a little shocked that anyone cares about such things, but the ydo. oh well.
I think I have something I really want to say to you but I can't find it. I'm really worn out now, and need to stop and rest. but I'm glad you took such an interest in all this.
Curt
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Karl Baba
Trad climber
Yosemite, Ca
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Mar 30, 2009 - 10:40am PT
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Hey Dirti
Never got your email. Changed my spam filters (which were tight from india) so mabye it's better now
Let the bile flow!
Baba
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neebee
Social climber
calif/texas
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Mar 30, 2009 - 03:55pm PT
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hey there dirt... got the email.... say, i do have a way with seeing the spiritual aspect of everything...
learened a lot as to seeing lots of things, and what others have gone through, too....
all is a treasure to share... and by god's good grace, too, after we climb through it all...
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dirtineye
Trad climber
the south
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Mar 30, 2009 - 06:46pm PT
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Karl, if the email you use for st is blocked you won't get it then, and that's the only one I have . I could go to you website for pics and contact you that way I suppose... why don't you post that website addy up right here?
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Karl Baba
Trad climber
Yosemite, Ca
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Mar 30, 2009 - 07:55pm PT
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My photo website is at
http://www.peaklightimages.com
and my climbing guide website is at
http://www.yosemiteclimber.com
that said, I just got your email but posted my sites anyway cause you asked and I'm poor after traveling all winter so I need all the publicity I can get.
I don't expect you're much in the market for photos eh? We ship worldwide!
;-)
baba
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neebee
Social climber
calif/texas
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Mar 30, 2009 - 09:32pm PT
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hey there dirt... here are some tropical gardens... more interesting than some of the ordinary... but anyone into gardens will mostlikley marvel over them, even though folks here can not always produce the same...
unless perhaps with greenhouses.. but still there they have the whole landscape before them...
they say gardens are good for the peace of the soul... example, as we have heard, are the japanese tea gardens,etc...
here are other type gardnes, though, in the tropic variety, hope this keeps your days busy and better:
link:
http://www.madeira-web.com/PagesUK/draw_thumbnail.php?search_category=Monte%20Palace%20Gardens&thumbnail_ratio=5&link_info=/PagesUK/images-maps.php:Images%20and%20Maps:
http://www.htbg.com/index.php?page=tour
hmm, well, i reckon this is all for right now...
god bless... and happy hiking trails... :)
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jbar
Social climber
Asymptote
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Mar 30, 2009 - 10:33pm PT
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Dirt I think what you said about service to others is right on the money. Most of us don't get that and it makes us unhappy. Then we sit around and try to figure out why we are unhappy. I'm one of those.
I can appreciate the boldness of laying your tracks on video for all the world to see. I remember way back when I would write short stories and turn them in to my professor anonymously. They were good but they were different and they were mine and I was afraid. Two of them were submitted to a litterary contest and won. I'm really not very good with attention and accolade either and tend to shy away from that type of thing. Most things I do I try to do anonymously. I would be terrified to get infront of a camera and play as you do. I know it doesn't matter but, for what it's worth, I sent your music link to a friend who plays the most incredible music on the worst guitar and she said you play beautifully. You know there is always a little math in art, and craft is all about making complex things into simple forms for us to try to understand and appreciate. Like a great painter, musician or even a chef. Otherwise it's just frou, art for the sake of art. I could never pluck strings like you do but I can understand how you do it and the beautiful compositions that come from it and I can derive joy from the images it brings and sometimes by imagining the posibility that I could even do it. Thinking about all of this music brings back my highland roots. Have you ever heard of Tom Dooly? http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=oB8Wonny5fs
About a min into his song he switches to "Miss Monoghan". I really like that tune. I've always liked the sound of steel strings. My father always played a steel string guitar and I grew to love the sound fingers make when they slide. You don't get that sound from studio music.
I do say my prayers out of sincerity. I'm not the holiest of people but I do believe and I believe he listens. I take care never to ask for anything for myself but pray often for others. Avoiding the complexity I'll just say that I believe sincere prayers and well wishes offered by people who truly believe, no matter what their beliefs, are positive energy. So I'll just keep on saying my prayers. No thanks or permission needed. My God loves you Curt. Even if you don't know him. And wishing the rainbow was just a bit of an old Welsh blessing I was thinking of and thought I'd send your way. Rain has been nice though it's a bit wet to get out and till the garden now. Should never plant before easter anyway.
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dirtineye
Trad climber
the south
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Mar 31, 2009 - 11:29am PT
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feeling good two days in a row... what can I say? No complaints!
Actually seem to be building some endurance back up FINALLY.
Cool pic jbar.
WIll write more later, got to do while I can do!
Thanks everyone foryour help!
Curt
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nita
climber
chica from chico, I don't claim to be a daisy
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Mar 31, 2009 - 11:34am PT
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Dirt.... Sweet news..:-)
Salud, xo nita
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dirtineye
Trad climber
the south
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Well still feeling good, so, time to write that more I was talking about..
So oops, should say jbar, mis read name... edit tocorret name of innocent, lol. hope he did not see this yet, um, oops again., yeah, I done heard of tom dooley, doc watson did it the best for me. Liked what you wrote about art and lit and all that. sounds about right to me.
we are supposed to get a hard freeze tomorrow night! gues planting before easter IS a bad thing, haha. we have planted only some onions from seed (gonna take all the way til august to get any onions I think, and these are those big bulb kind that keep a long time, for soup, cooking, etc) andsome spring lettuce. I think we got ripped off on some fruit trees-- advertized ad 'instant orchard"- well, we paidn a LOT to get that casue I won;t be here this time next year, and can yo ubeleive it NOT A LOOM IN THE BUNCH, HOWEER, the ONE apple my mom went and bought locally with NO guarantee of fruit this yeas has flowere on it, LOL. SO much for THAT stupid company that advertizes instand orchard. the way I understand it, fruit trees put out the floweres first, THEN the leaves right? well thes have the laves, but no flowers... yet. Guess I'll call monday and see what's up. AND, one of the suckers is dead, and they want us to cut it up adn asend it back, LOL. NEver hared of that. usually it'sm "OH, OK we will replace it.". I don't think those people are playign with a full deck somehow. MOST places would think hmmm bought 5, ssays one died, PROBABLY telling the truth, must not blow it for future orders, Must give good service, and act accordingly. Not this place. THey even got part of the first order wrong, which is the ONLY reason we have a tree with any flowers on it at all- that one my mom went and bought locally with no guarantee, for a LOT less money LOL.
SHould have the strawberries in mid april, bear in june. GOnna be the good ones, finally found what I used to grow from gurneys, the guy said that one is ALL they sell, everyone lieks em, and they look just like what I grew in the 70's. such a treat! we got 50 plants for a really low price, and one bed is already prepared for about half of em. will be fun to fight slugs with beer traps again (think I'll catch any climbers in my beer traps?)
Back to the posting yoru work for all to see, well I jsut put em on my photobucket site, jsut a few, mainly to send to Mr gilbert and some other makers, I think david russel saw the one called fantasy, and MIGHT be interested in the score, but I can't swear to it yet. haha, when he calls me, then I'll know for sure. Rightgt now I am so pissed off at cubase, for siome reason the 500 ollar program CUbase sx (now obsolete, I COULD upgrade for ANOTHER 200 to cubase 5 or soethign liek that, but that idiot sx decides the other day, no, you can't make a CD, and btw, I've changed everythign cause you tried and now you can't even replay your audio or record cause hte inputs are all pending, (HUH? WHEN did I change hte inputs?) Well I DIDN"T cahnger em, LOL, can you say, BUG, which is about all I've seen from Cubase, so I'm thinking after monday trying to the a strariaght anser from cubase to see if Protools will upgrade me from CUbase to their product, and since EVERYONE seems to liek protool, maybe I can get it to be reliable and staright forward, and actually GET SOMETHING DONE when I want, and not have to fight with sorftware glitches.
HAHA this end of life rant is becomeing a what pisses me off rant!!
What a luxury, to be able to waste time being p[issed off at this sort ofthing.
My only medical complaint is , still dying from cancer, otherwise, life is perfect, hah!
WEll the damend drain tube usually hurts , mire than anyting else, butthat may get fixed next week, but there IS one problem... the 'bile' is not um, a slightly opaque lightest color of jade you've ever seen (almost white)-- not right for bile, is it? so I don;t know what is going on there. probably just hte calm before the storm. I AM turning a bit yellow again, but there is bile in stool, so, we shall see what the genius doc says. I jsut hopw for an internal solution, cause that is at least a chance to get treatment again, and extend life a good bit.
I'm also looking into selling some guitars for some really small diaphram mikes, earthworks sr-30 and smp and two channel preamp, plus a REAL interface to the PC as opposed to the lexicon omega box I have. Just need to find one that is really good and not too expensive.
Got to get a cd sampler to the gilberts to try one last time for that extended neck classical. but, with the guitars i ahve, I stil lcan do OK. I hope to live long enough to get another blanchard with a longer neck too, (set deeper into body, more access to upper frets, and 22-24 frets) so my contribution to the guitar world will be on both classical and steel. really, without intermediate (at least) classical technique, most players don't have a hope to do most of my music-- that's the real drawback to getting it played. the classical people are not going to touch it on steel, and the average steel player Cant play that way, so, maybe not too many people will play this sttuff. that would be too bad. CaueI think it's pretty easy ( guess I should, cause I wrote it) and the harder stuff is still doable, but I've been doing ot um, for a long time, so my perspective is all goofy when it comes to thinking other people could do it easily I guess. I jsut never think I'm doing the impossible cause, for so long I just didn't think I was that good. Guess well see what hte world really think before long, heh. when the cds come out. got enough material down for one now (assuming we can get em ripped to waves and onto a CD that is playable, gRRRR, stupid cubase!)
Hey nita.
So anyway, for now, I'm gooc. could go bad this week, ya never know, and i don't usually get much warning, but again, we'll kow soon enough . IF the doc goes in again and can't get anything done for all teh tunor, I'm in big trouble. if he can, then I get at least a short reprieve, maybe a long one. at any reate, the evil hurty tube will be replaced wiht a more comfortable better placed one, and that will be something, cause it is hte thing that hurts the most. About 80% of my pain med use goes to that stupid tube problem, and drugs really don't help much with physical trouble like a foreng body causeing discomfort-- the only thing that haelps that is getting rid of the thing!
WQish me luck this week, I'll need it.
Later.
Curt
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Fish Finder
Social climber
THE BOTTOM OF MY HEART
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GOOD LUCK THIS WEEK CURT!!!!!!!!!
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Jello
Social climber
No Ut
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Hey, Curt...Good luck this week! Glad things are well for the time being.
Hope you can get out to the top of Utah sometime soon.
-YourJelloFriend
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dirtineye
Trad climber
the south
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Thanks fish finder-- did yo uever find fish?
Jeff, if this tube thign works out, I plan on visiting utah. Well, you, really, but you are in utah, and that can't be helped.
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neebee
Social climber
calif/texas
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hey there dirt... say, just wishing you that luck and many prayers, this weekend! :)
*neat pic, jbar... :)
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Jaybro
Social climber
wuz real!
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Good luck!
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darod
Big Wall climber
South Side Billburg
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good luck dirt, sending you good vibes always...
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dirtineye
Trad climber
the south
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thanks dar, neeb, jayBRO, hehe. and I FINALLY ( being not quite as drugged just yet, it's only 9 am or so here) that jbar's cool pic is a full rainbow, DUH, silly me, wow that ZIS cool. I first thought it was a lens flare thingy, cool still, but not nearly as neat as what it actually seems to be.. (now watch me turn out to be wrong, heh.)
Curt
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dirtineye
Trad climber
the south
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Oh yeah Jbar, abut your god ideas, sonds good to me. You are right, no permission needed, I think we fought a war about that sort of thing (sort of) inthis country once, hehe.
Anyway, not that it matters, but I do like how you said it. HOpe it sinks in to the insincere as well as comforts those whom the official church seems to have unjustified power over ( and uses for worse), and YOU know who I'm talking about, you bad little mormon girl who want's to be good)
Curt
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nature
climber
Tucson, AZ
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good luck this week, Curt!
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#310
Social climber
Telluride, CO
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Curt
Good luck this week - hope the new tube goes in perfect and you get pain relief and lots more quality time.
It is still winter big tiem in Western Colorado and most of the peach and apricot trees froze last week. Mother Nature stirring up trouble.
I also hope you get your software problem fixed for free and can record like you want to.
Positive thoughts haeding your way - fight the Big C longer.
Kathy
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Fish Finder
Social climber
THE BOTTOM OF MY HEART
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Good morning dirt,
Hope the sun finds you well today.
I have found Fish a few times. He's usually kicking my ass at poker or doing weird things with his toes so its not much of a find .
Hey i got a chance to listen to your guitar playing..... very cool. Looks like it takes the likes of discipline i will never possess .
I am glad your feeling well enough to post and share your ordeal.
True courage. Thanks Curt.
Best Gregg
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Mimi
climber
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Best of luck this week, Curt.
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dirtineye
Trad climber
the south
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thanks all so much, gregg, I JUST finished th in a game taht paid starting at 3, with about 27 starting players, and ONE DAMNED hand, which I TOTALLY misplayed, and KNEW i was misplaying it, cost me jsut about all my stack, Kings, , ran into straight he woudl not even have played if I had done the right right thing and completed instead of being a DONKEY can calling the bring in with a pair of KINGS!!!!!! and TWO door cards showing my kicker an 8, which I hit for kings up on card 4 or 5. AGAIN I should not even ahve played with two 8s already gone, close to the money, no need to take ANY risk, nearly guaranteed a cash, but he stayed and hit, and the min bet was 600, so a few of those and I was down to 8oo, DOH! from one of the chip leaders at the table to last. THen the same guy beat my kings up (another hand, played right but no chips to back up my bets) by sucking out with no starting pair, DOH!
OOps what a poker rant.
Oh, abut the playing guitar, yeah, I guess it IS discipline, which is funny. I never got any credit from anyone for having any discipline, but I credit myself with obsession, which can seem like discipline if you work it right, LOL. But in the end, I guess I actually DID have to have quite a bit of real discipline, so, just goes to show you, don't listen too closely to your critics, they are often wrong, and they can send you down a very bad path involving self image and what you can actually accomplish in life, if you let em.
Discouragement is just not a good thing to dish out to kids.
Man I am doing it again, guiding and guruing and aphorizing and all that stuff I said I didn't want to do, ROTFLMAO!
well, I hope it helps someone.
Curt
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Mimi
climber
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Awesome rant, dirt. How could anyone knott enjoy an exciting poker story?!
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scuffy b
climber
Frigate Matilda
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It's great to be reading you, Curt.
As you say, those critics can plant some false ideas...
they can be hard to overcome...
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dirtineye
Trad climber
the south
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heh, well it's not exactly an exciting pker story, it's more of a poker fvckup story.
The exciting one was the time I hit the straight fulsh agsint the MORON who had been playing liek a tota lidiot going all in ofter and calling down good raises from good hands anc sucking out on the rover with his pathertic K4 ro beat JJ, UGH, OVER AND OVER, but like I said I had the straight flusnh ahd this turkey caught the ace high flush so of course I got a heap of chips off that bastard,
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nature
climber
Tucson, AZ
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um... Curt... anything neat in the mail recently?
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jbar
Social climber
urasymptote
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Hey Dirt,
Edit to correct the name eh? Wish I had been on here lately and seen what you put originally. And there aint no innocent pal. :o)
Just had the first night of that hard freeze and tonight is supposed to be even colder. May be foolish but I'm going hunting for some ice to climb around 5 in the morning. Just can't give up on an opportunity. Haven't planted anything yet but I read the past posts and ordered some volkov tomatos and the cherokee purples too. I always enjoyed throwing a few heirlooms into the garden. Found a really interesting pepper called a fish pepper and some eggplant that should do well down here from fedco. Thats crazy about having to send a dead tree in for credit. Maybe they need it for an autopsy. Must make sure you didn't poison it or check it for signs of sexual assault.
Good to hear your doing well. You keep up the posting and I'll keep up the praying. The coolest thing about that rainbow pic is that it really is a double rainbow. Not a trick of the lens. Good luck getting the "evil hurty tube" replaced. Anything that decreases the number of drugs you gotta take is good.
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dirtineye
Trad climber
the south
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Jbar, haha you betcha! (OH NO, a Palinism, from MEEEEEE! aiiiieeeeeeeeeeeee!) Does this mean I will be soon and unwittingly endorsing abstinence? God I hope not.
BUt as fro everything else, Right on all counts you are. truly great double RB shot. I gotta go sleep now, but will write more.
Nature, HEHE, why now that you mention it, just recently in fact, monday I believe it was, I got this really neat warren g harding shirt about B.A.T. gear! From you, the bait eater!
Gotta say, I love it.
thanks man, but I still won't be eating sushi, and shrimp (my dear, beloved shrimp) is totally off the menu at least for now, BOO HOO HOO, I HATE IT!!!
But linking me up with the basically absurd has GOT to be the right move.
Curt
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dirtineye
Trad climber
the south
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haha well, I suppose I need some hair accessories to fire up this thread.
Sorry, just nausea as the bile backs up nad a little leaks thoguh to the intestine somehow, cause it sure ain't coming out the drain tube. UGH.
that was not a pretty business to discover.
As they ahve been saying for week though, everything should be ready to go now, or the procdedure, and then we'll know how the story will play out.
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jen_c
Trad climber
Lawrenceville, GA
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Apr 10, 2009 - 02:00pm PT
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CurtiePie...
When are you going to get better so we can go climbing again?!?! LOL
Keeping you in my thoughts and prayers :)
Jen
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dirtineye
Trad climber
the south
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Apr 11, 2009 - 06:11am PT
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hey TR n Fatty, thanks.
And Jen C, without major miracle, no more climbing for me.
Only thing to add is that this crap hurts, antibiotics helped with the mysterious infection but they do nothing for the back pressure of course- the stupid tube is sealed with goop. assuming the tube can still be used a a guide the deal will happen this week.
If it can't thwn apparently the best thing is to remand from Hospice get the correct things donw, then get back on, or in the best case, be able to start a treatment that is impossible with the external drain in place.
I'm expecting the worst, just because I have this feeling that too much time has passed and somethign bad will happen during this procedure, or it will be cut short for reasons I gave about andback to square one, where we were abotu two months ago, with a liver blocked and under severe back pressure and needing immediate relief.
Of course during all this time the tumors hav not sat still.
IT's getting bleak. Pary you religious nutjobs, PRAY!!! LOL I really do needa miracle. at least long enough to get the music out.
damitall, I'll probably drag along just enough to get several cds done, then they will be used as sacred music, AIIIIEEEEEEE!!!!
that would prove that god exists and that he has a sick sense of humor too.
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up2top
Big Wall climber
Phoenix, AZ
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Apr 11, 2009 - 06:32am PT
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Prayers going out for you tonight, Curt. If not for a miracle, then at least for some success in relieving your pain -- preferably while still living.
Ed
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Brunosafari
Boulder climber
OR
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Apr 11, 2009 - 11:20am PT
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Wise words, Curt about the limitations and dark power of personal critics.
Since tomorrow is Easter, I want to wish you the greatest distance from any tomb, save the Empty One.
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jbar
Social climber
urasymptote
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Apr 12, 2009 - 11:47am PT
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Posting Happy Easter curt! Hope you're able to enjoy it.
Nice line there Brunosafari.
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dirtineye
Trad climber
the south
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Apr 12, 2009 - 08:34pm PT
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I knew I could count on my religio-intospectivo, whatevero pals to come up with something!
Yeah I really think most critics are aiming at being as#@&%es, not improving things.
I'd say more but this back pressure is getting me down, gotta go!
Curt
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Chip
Trad climber
Sittin' Pretty in Fat City
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Oakie, I'm hoping you get better weather than we have this weekend. Somehow, I expect you have enough rain gear to get by either way.
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Double D
climber
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My thoughts and prayers go out to ya Dirt. Does anyone have an update?
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RRK
Trad climber
Talladega, Al
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update of sorts - Dirt got his drain rerouted and is doing much better. When I talked to him last week he was very upbeat and seemed much less medicated. This past weekend Shannon Stegg took him up to Big South Fork for a little climbing get-together with some of the heavy hitters from that area. He lobbied hard for me to go along but the "real world" was pressing hard so I had to let it slide. Thus I can't give an on-site report of what must have been a fascinating weekend. Dirt left a message on my machine Sunday while I was out and said the trip was very good and exactly what he needed. I'll probably talk to him tomorrow or the next day and let you know what's up. For now it seems that things are going better than expected considering the circumstances. My bet is that pretty soon we'll be trying to piece together a crappy-ass rack for the old buzzard when he decides that he's not too far gone to take the rope up one last time and then realizes that he's given away all his gear. We've already had his "going away climbathon" a couple of times already so maybe we can franchise it if we can get him out again.
RRK
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Mimi
climber
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May 16, 2009 - 12:14am PT
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How's that old buzzard doing?
It's that time of year again, Curt. All the best.
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neebee
Social climber
calif/texas
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May 16, 2009 - 12:18am PT
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hey there, say, dirt, curt... just saying hey there... my line has been tied up to computer doing lots of book work,not the paying kind though...
god bless, hope all is getting by, as best is for you... keep loving the joys of the garden... it is rest for the soul, at times... :)
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Zander
Trad climber
Berkeley
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May 20, 2009 - 12:12am PT
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Hey Dirt, all the best.
Zander
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jbar
Social climber
urasymptote
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May 20, 2009 - 01:43am PT
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Saw this pop up again, been wonderin bout ol' dirt. Still keeping hopes up. If need be he can borrow my crappy ass rack any day.
Jeremy
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nita
climber
chica from chico, I don't claim to be a daisy
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May 20, 2009 - 01:57am PT
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Still sending out Best Wishes..
xoxo...nita
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Hardman Knott
Gym climber
Muir Woods National Monument, Mill Valley, Ca
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May 20, 2009 - 02:21am PT
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I was wondering how the ol' bastard is doing. Any news?
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dirtineye
Trad climber
the south
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May 20, 2009 - 09:22am PT
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The old bastard is doing a little better for a change I think.
It's just posible that the chemo is working already-- I certainly feel likethe tumor is having less say in things these days.
Thanks again to everyone here for their support.
Work on commercial CDs is moving along, although slow. RIght now we have problably enough for one adn a half, of the old stff, and still need to get down a butt-load of the new stuff possibly on new microphones if they can test out better than my Octavas.
Anyone here know anything about earthworks?
Thanks again,
Curt
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Chaz
Trad climber
Boss Angeles
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May 20, 2009 - 10:05am PT
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Earthworks was cool. I liked Bruford and King Crimson better though. And UK.
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Dick_Lugar
Trad climber
Indiana (the other Mideast)
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May 20, 2009 - 01:20pm PT
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Hey Curt...glad to hear you're feeling better of late. Good luck on completing your CD, looking forward to hearing it. Have a good day!
Frank
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dirtineye
Trad climber
the south
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May 20, 2009 - 08:05pm PT
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earthworks is a microphone company.
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Mighty Hiker
Social climber
Vancouver, B.C.
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Jun 28, 2009 - 03:40pm PT
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Anyone hear from Curt lately? His most recent post was about a month ago. I hope he's doing OK.
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neebee
Social climber
calif/texas
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Jun 28, 2009 - 03:44pm PT
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hey there mightyhiker, say, i was wondering.... i will see if i can learn anything....
i will try to let you know before tonight...
if not, i know that there is a few other folks who can find out, too....
sure hope it is only due to summer time, and that he is just busy...
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Hardman Knott
Gym climber
Muir Woods National Monument, Mill Valley, Ca
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Jun 28, 2009 - 03:52pm PT
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Mighty Hiker wrote:
Anyone hear from Curt lately? His most recent post was about a month ago. I hope he's doing OK.
Wow - that's crazy, I just e-mailed Curt a few hours ago because I realized he hadn't posted since the 4th.
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neebee
Social climber
calif/texas
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Jun 28, 2009 - 05:21pm PT
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hey there say, all, .... dirtineye, curt... well, he said that "irrashinable charter" was down... that, meaning his internet service was down...
he said to just tell you all hi and all that good stuff--i had let him know that mighty hiker had posted...
other than that, i am not up to date on how he is feeling, though... but he knows that you all miss him, as of fresh, today...
wow--sure hope he can get his internet service solved :(
god bless to all...
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neebee
Social climber
calif/texas
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Jun 29, 2009 - 03:13am PT
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hey there mighty hiker and all... not sure if you saw this earlier... are you in canada... is it still early enough for you to see this?
too late for some east coaster, perhaps... but say, maybe some on the west can take note...
maybe someone can also give him a phone call tomorrow or such...
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neebee
Social climber
calif/texas
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Jun 29, 2009 - 08:17pm PT
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hey there say, all...
bump for the dirtineye fan club... :)
say, hardman knott,
not sure if he will get the email, if the computer service is down????
say, sure hope someone can give him a ring...
*he seemed okay, (tired maybe? but maybe that's from medicine) but we didn't share health issues, i was just letting him know that mighty hiker had wondered where he was...
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jbar
Social climber
urasymptote
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Jul 11, 2009 - 02:09am PT
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Anyone hear any news on Curt? I sent him a email the night I heard about John Bachar to make sure he checked in on Supertopo but I haven't heard back from him and his last post was a while ago.
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neebee
Social climber
calif/texas
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Jul 11, 2009 - 05:02am PT
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hey there jbar... say, i had called him to let him know about john, but he was sounding kind of sleepy so i hope i understood me correct.... he was gonna call back, but i got a call from calif...
his internet is down...
if anyone knows him.. .say, please give him a call...
i will try to call him tomorrow night...
i only have a track phone to use for long distance (don't use reg phone for that)... so i have to call and he calls me back...
i just happened to mess up when my line got busy from my calif. phone gal... a long time friend needed some help-advice, et... so the call was long...
sure hope dirt didn't think i was rude... :(
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jbar
Social climber
urasymptote
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Jul 11, 2009 - 05:06am PT
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nah, sure he didn't think that.
Got a card sitting by my computer I've been meaning to stick in the mail to you neebee. I'll try to get it out 2day.
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graniteclimber
Trad climber
Nowhere
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Jul 28, 2009 - 12:45pm PT
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How is he doing?
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'Pass the Pitons' Pete
Big Wall climber
like Ontario, Canada, eh?
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Jul 31, 2009 - 02:03pm PT
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How is it there were HUNDREDS of posts on this thread, and suddenly almost nothing for over two months? Anyone know anything?
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dirtbag
climber
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Jul 31, 2009 - 02:09pm PT
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Uh-oh, that doesn't sound good.
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healyje
Trad climber
Portland, Oregon
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Jul 31, 2009 - 02:25pm PT
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Curt - que pasa?
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Hardman Knott
Gym climber
Muir Woods National Monument, Mill Valley, Ca
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Jul 31, 2009 - 02:44pm PT
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I e-mailed him a month ago (see my post up-thread), and he wrote back and said that
all treatment had been stopped - and spoke words to the effect that the end was near.
I felt bad for not replying - but frankly couldn't think of anything to say that wouldn't be lame.
I mean, what do you say? "Be strong"? "Fight it, bro!"? "It was nice to know you"? "See you in the next life"?
I hope he's still with us and sees this post, but honestly it will make me feel
much better knowing he's no longer in pain, or drugged practically into oblivion.
I've got a video on my iPhone of Curt playing his guitar - he won't be forgotten.
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dirtbag
climber
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Jul 31, 2009 - 02:50pm PT
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Thanks HK.
I hope things went or are going as well as they could.
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Dick_Lugar
Trad climber
Indiana (the other Mideast)
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Jul 31, 2009 - 02:54pm PT
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I know one thing for sure, Curt HAS put up one helluva fight. He's been dealing with this for years now. I'm just in awe how strong he ha been in dealing with it. Peace Curt!
Frank
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Jennie
Trad climber
Elk Creek, Idaho
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Topic Author's Reply - Jul 31, 2009 - 02:59pm PT
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I wish I had optimistic news about Curt. A few days ago he said he thought the end was near and that he was "too druggy" to post on ST. If anyone wants his cell number, email me at jenniflng@aol.com. (email through ST doesn't usually work for me)
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Hardman Knott
Gym climber
Muir Woods National Monument, Mill Valley, Ca
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Jul 31, 2009 - 03:19pm PT
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Jennie - email sent...
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healyje
Trad climber
Portland, Oregon
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Jul 31, 2009 - 03:42pm PT
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I think there's a time for fighting and a time for laying it down and I'm usually inclined to trust the judgment of someone as smart and talented as Curt. I'd sure be supportive of any decision he's made. If that was to stop treatment then I'd say sail on in peace, it's been a real pleasure knowing you.
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justthemaid
climber
Los Angeles
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Jul 31, 2009 - 04:10pm PT
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I've talked to Curt and his mom a few times in the last month.
His computer has been giving him trouble and he usually doesn't have the energy for it- which is one of the reasons he has stopped posting.
He wanted some more stained glass so we traded for one of his cameras. He was happy with the pieces I sent him and we talked about them for a while.
He has basically ceased treatment and is under constant care. He's very weak and groggy from the pain killers. His mood varies from day to day. Some days he's upbeat, more often.. not so much.
What else can I say? My friend is not well and not happy about it.
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Mighty Hiker
Social climber
Vancouver, B.C.
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Jul 31, 2009 - 06:11pm PT
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Well, sad though the situation seems, let's hope for the best, and let Curt know that we're thinking of him, even if that's all we can do. He's gone through a lot, and moral support may comfort him a bit.
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Jaybro
Social climber
Wolf City, Wyoming
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Jul 31, 2009 - 06:18pm PT
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Namaste, 'n shit!
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Karl Baba
Trad climber
Yosemite, Ca
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Jul 31, 2009 - 08:08pm PT
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Thanks for not forgetting Curt
Best Love and Wishes always Dirty
Peace
Karl
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Mimi
climber
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Jul 31, 2009 - 09:55pm PT
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No news isn't always good news. Yeah, it's okay to let go. God bless Curt. We'll miss you, man. All the best and WTF!
Too bad we never got to share a rope or a fireside chat or listen to you on the guitar. Don't be late.
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Hardman Knott
Gym climber
Muir Woods National Monument, Mill Valley, Ca
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I called Curt today and left a message. A bit later Tom dialed my number and handed the phone to Curt.
I told him several people were asking about him, and I read him some of the recent posts from this thread.
I won't try to sugar coat it - Curt is indeed really close at this point. Basically languishing.
And in pain despite being heavily sedated by the pain meds. He's in bed 24/7.
I asked him if he wished he could just "pull the plug" - without hesitating he said yes.
All I could do was tell him that I was glad to have "known" him, and that at his nastiest
he was no match for me (especially since I didn't have an excuse - ie basically dying).
I apologized for once calling him "Cancer Boy" - does it get any lower than that?
He appreciates your posts. Said he was glad he wasn't in California because he'd
probably get "too many visitors" - sometimes it's overwhelming.
Very very sad today.
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Jaybro
Social climber
Wolf City, Wyoming
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Godspeed
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Karl Baba
Trad climber
Yosemite, Ca
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August 6th is the full Moon.
Let me suggest we all try to send some good energy and love (even prayers) to Curt on August 6th, perhaps as close to the time the Moon rises in Georgia as possible (isn't Curt down there somewhere?) Somebody help me figure out what that would be in pacific time
If he's heading out, let's give him a care package to take along.
Much love
Karl
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Mimi
climber
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Doesn't sound like he'll make it to the 6th. Good on you Dave for calling him. Thanks for the update. I lost a good friend in a motorcycle crash last weekend and recently put down one of our cats. Bachar, Brutus; the last few weeks have been brutal. Life can be so sad.
God relieve him from his suffering.
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neebee
Social climber
calif/texas
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hey there hardmanknott... ohmy.. say, no wonder i got no answer the last time i called him... oh my....
:(
well---we can pray and fight for him to "bridge over" as smooth as possible... and we will know that we offered the best that we could...
thanks for the share... oh my...
i dont know what else we can do to share his journey, as friends... :(
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Zander
Trad climber
Berkeley
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All the best, Dirt,
I'm thinking about you.
Zander
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Redwreck
Social climber
Echo Parque, Los Angeles, CA
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I've missed that crusty bastard's presence here, and I'll hate to see him go.
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Short4Bob
Trad climber
Morgantown, WV
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Dirt and I (pun intended) had a long phone conversation a very long time ago; I doubt he remembers it, but I do fondly.
Regardless, he helped get me over my irrational fear of cams way back when and has otherwise been a sweet, well-meaning guy who has been incredibly supportive of women climbers.
You're one tough SOB, man. If it's your time, it's your time, and I respect that. Sorry to be selfish and wish you'd be around longer, but if you're suffering, you do what you need to do.
All the best in this life and the next. We'll see you this next go-'round.
You done good, sir.
Kate
Short4Bob
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Studly
Trad climber
WA
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Hey Dirt Curt:
This adventure draws to a close, but a fabulous new one is about to unfold. Don't sweat it to much, hang in there, you have fought the good fight all the way. I salute you for not giving up, be strong, and remember its just a door you are walking thru. Peace be with you my brother.
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Jaybro
Social climber
Wolf City, Wyoming
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"Death is an awakening." Leo Tostoi.
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Jello
Social climber
No Ut
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Curt, I'm sorry we weren't able to get together for a few days out at my place. But I'm really glad I came out to visit you last spring. I've got the CD you gave me and listen to it often. I know you don't think it's your best music, but I think it's great and will think of you every time I spin it.
I'm up in BC working with the energy healer we talked about. We all do what we can to stay on this beautiful planet. The time comes for each of us to go, though. It will for me as it seems it has for you. I'll remember you as long as I have a sound heart and mind.
I'll be listenning for some super sweet guitar sounds in the night sky.
My thoughts are with you.
-Jeff
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dougs510
Social climber
down south
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Well buddy,
I wish you peace. It's the strangest thing. I really wished I would have taken up on the offer to climb, maybe we'll meet again in the next place.
Take courage and heart. I'll let poser know the situation an I can promise you, you will not soon be forgotten.
Love to you.
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Fletcher
Trad climber
a buttery white sand beach... I wish!
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Peace, dirtineye, peace.
Eric
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johntp
Trad climber
socal
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Curt-
Freaking love your in the face posts.
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happiegrrrl
Trad climber
New York, NY
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As irascible as Dirtineye always has been(so far as I ever knew), I did get my first lead with him on the belay, and I thank him for that.
I had to pry him off the route he was cleaning(which turned out to be called Soup Pillow, unless he changed the name), a filthy, choss-strewn scenic route that included a meandering stream of water. Not once, but over the course of two trips. And by the time I actually GOT to the route he'd suggested, the sun was waning. He swore it was because I was so slow, that it was dark when I topped out, but the fact really was, and he very well knows it to be true, that nobody could find side-projects while working a route like he could....
The funniest part of that experience was his own making. Dirtineye never subscribed to the "Light and Fast" method of climbing. He came....prepared. And his pack bore the weight to prove it. As did mine, as he had thrown in Big Bros and giant tricams...in case. If He had known about Valley Giants, I don't doubt he would have had some.
So, this is a route, about 5.5, that is used to climb out of a cliff section which you rap into. I do my lead. It gets dark, and after working all day long cleaning a hard route, he now has to follow me with not only his absurdly heavy pack on, but go back down afterward to retrieve mine, which weighs just as much, and climb up again.
After the first haul(literally), he suggests we come back the next day for mine.... Ummm, no. I had not only food in it, but my wallet. I refused. This is possibly the only time in the history of the climbing he and I did(which only spanned a few months) that I ever succeeded in getting that guy to do something he ...preferred...not to.
At any rate, thanks Curt, for the belay on that first lead, and the tours to a few crags in AL/GA/TN. And especially the last one to Big South Fork. It really is one hell of a place, and I am sure of your friends will put up a route or two with your name on it once you really do prusik out of this plane. People are saying maybe soon. But like your cleaning on a new route, it seems you like to get involved in side projects along the way. Anyone on belay with Curt for this one - better hope you have a comfy ledge to settle in on.
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Karl Baba
Trad climber
Yosemite, Ca
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Keeping you in mind Curt Bro. Remember our talk on the phone and aim for a good seat on the bus out a this crabfeed.
Much love, I'm pulling for you.
Peace
Karl
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Ksolem
Trad climber
Monrovia, California
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Back in April I was on here talking about my own issues, which pale in comparison to what Curt is facing. As far as I know Curt and I have not met, yet he found it in himself to make what was at that time a rare appearance to throw down words of support...
"good luck beating this thing man!
Soounds like you are on the right track (assuming 'm not totally mising something, wich isentirelypossible with all these drugs)
and I hope you can put the troubles behind you ahd get on with a great life."
At the time I didn't know what to say. Now, better late than never I'll keep it simple... Thanks Curt - your words meant a lot to me.
I've heard that your music is truly great, perhaps someone can post up some titles to look for?
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bluering
Trad climber
Santa Clara, Ca.
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Good luck, Dirt.
God bless ya, dude!
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Patrick Sawyer
climber
Originally California now Ireland
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Hey Curt, my thoughts are with you. Keep on truckin' dude.
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Jim E
climber
away
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Curt, You and I haven't chatted for a while but I want you to know I think of you often.
I wish you the best on your journey.
Climb on!
Jim
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Ray-J
Social climber
east L.A. vato...
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Good luck curt - get better, post up soon.
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Karl Baba
Trad climber
Yosemite, Ca
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As Dirt gets closer to the dirt, he recognizes the good will that people who want to pray for him have and he's softened on accepting good vibes in all forms. We've had a talk or two about such things..I'd say he's open but up in the air about the next world and stuff.
Plus it doesn't hurt to hedge your bets a bit when your options run slim. He's just being honest about not being convinced.
I'll speak for him in advance so he might actually chime in if I'm wrong but I bet if he was in shape to type, he'd thank those who are thinking of him and appreciate the climbing community supporting him.
Peace
Karl
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Curt
Boulder climber
Gilbert, AZ
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Curt,
When I catch up with you, we'll have another wee dram.
The other Curt
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neebee
Social climber
calif/texas
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hey there say, dirt... don't know if your computer is better yet, so folks can read these to you... most likely you'd be asleep tonight anyway...
i was gonna call, but i got home too late... and a call came in...
i'm calling you tomorrow... if you read this in the morning...
sure hope someone can help you take the call...
god bless and may the good lord's love send deep comfort to you--just ask (as my father in law did--and at the last minutes, too):
and comfort came, it REALLY did for my father in law when he was on his deathbed with cancer...
hard to belive, but he then died with a smile on his face and in peach---after the worse pains that he ever had HAD in his life...
love from neebee, trying to be like a good loving sister to you, even though we never met...
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Jaybro
Social climber
Wolf City, Wyoming
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He did once say that he appreciated the sincerity of the prayers, even if he didn't agree with the methodology.
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Johno
Big Wall climber
Cape Town / Japan
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All the best, Curt.
Johnathan
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Jennie
Trad climber
Elk Creek, Idaho
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Topic Author's Reply - Aug 3, 2009 - 10:54am PT
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"Again, who is Tom? Does anyone know? Father? Brother? Caretaker? Will he be able to read all of our heartfelt comments to Curt and will he keep us advised when the dreaded time comes? Curt needs to go out knowing we all care about him."
Hi HD,
Tom is Curt’s longtime pal. They’ve been friends since youth. He’s assisting the family in Curt’s care.
I reminded Tom of the forum postings. If the situation permits, he may be able to pass forum messages to Curt. Perhaps we should not expect it but having Curt’s comfort and feelings at heart, he may do so.
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MisterE
Trad climber
Meeteetse, Wyoming
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I'll send some good thoughts to the old Curmudgeon
Keep fighting, Dirt!
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Largo
Sport climber
Venice, Ca
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Easy does it, Amigo.
JL
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nature
climber
Tucson, AZ
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Awe Curt.... the place just won't be the same without you around.
so sorry about this news. loss for words...
om shanti, bro...
~doug
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Ed Hartouni
Trad climber
Livermore, CA
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There isn't a whole lot to say, Dirtineye, certainly it would have been nice to have met you out there on the rock and climbed on some of that same ground you called home, and heard the stories, the lies and slander, the history and all that.
One thing about this place, the SuperTacoForum, is that we got to do a bit of that even without ever having been able to get together. And your voice added to the whole chorus of voices of this once extended tribe, now a single virtual tribe, having found one another, and the courage to post up our thoughts, opinions and fears and dreams.
You are a part of that, and even after you die your voice will still be here, and your memories too. I know that every time I post up some calculation I should check it twice, and maybe three times because I am prone to error, and you reminded me of that once... catching one of my mistakes. Too fast for my own good. But it's a reason to post rather than not to, the fact that someone can point out the errors of our reasoning, if there are errors.
I don't know if you will ever read or hear this, but please know that I valued your part in this tribe, and that you won't be soon forgotten. You precede us, but it is a path we'll all walk down. We'll learn from your lesson, we can tell you words of support, but you've got to do it alone. From what I can gather, you've been doing a fine job of it.
I'll say my good byes now when you can know it, and wish you a peaceful transition.
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scuffy b
climber
Sinatra to Singapore
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Curt,
I'm grateful for your presence here.
You could have just ignored us, let us live with
complacent errors in thought, hidden your flaws from us...
I think your speaking openly of your health issues probably
will end up saving someone's life.
Plus, now I know more ways to tie my shoes.
Thanks, Man.
You made some awfully beautiful Music.
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Karl Baba
Trad climber
Yosemite, Ca
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I'm tempted to post some sarcastic abuse about Curt since I know he'd like that and probably can't digest too much sweetness in one dose.
You know, something like "Die Curt Die!" Or "Hell awaits it's dark lord with 72 non-virgins and copious double-malt"
But you might not get to see the thread and the taco might burn me at the stake and I don't want to share a seat with you on the cosmic bus, no matter how nice the destination might be. You'll have good company anyway. If you find yourself with Woody talking politics, you'll know it's purgatory.
So I just keep you in my thoughts bro and send love. You set the stage for it in good style with this thread. The candle here will burn until you're well on your journey
Peace
Karl
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Karl Baba
Trad climber
Yosemite, Ca
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Bump. Now and tomorrow evening might be good times to send some extra good vibe for Curt and his transformation.
Wishing ya well man
Peace
Karl
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Chaz
Trad climber
greater Boss Angeles area
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I never know what to say in times like this. I doubt many of us do.
But I'm just thinking about my friend who I have never met.
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Zander
Trad climber
Berkeley
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Hey Dirt,
I enjoyed your presence here. Sending good thoughts your way.
Zander
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Richard
climber
Bend, OR.
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Perhaps someone should chanel Curt on the "Why are those Republicans so wrong on everything" thread. That would bring a smile to his face
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Jennie
Trad climber
Elk Creek, Idaho
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Topic Author's Reply - Aug 5, 2009 - 09:51pm PT
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Curt was in great discomfort earlier in the week. It was necessary to insert a catheter Monday which he was quite unhappy about. However, the catheter is helping him eliminate more toxins from his body. His liver is failing more and more and his kidneys are taking over somewhat for his liver by removing excess bilirubin from his blood.
After the catheter, he began eating again after refusing food for a period of time. Tom said he is aware of well wishing from friends and members of the climbing community. He was able to manage a smile and have short conversations with those around him last night.
But he is very sick and it’s doubtful he will leave bed under his own power again. He’s in a very hard place communicating as he has to take so much medication he doesn’t have his mental clarity, except for short periods of time. He does have an IVAC pain pump in addition to oral medication.
He is clinging to life bravely.
I dislike posting this sad news and hope Curt would not consider it as a breach of his privacy. Well wishers have inquired with Tom and Curt’s family and several have asked me what I know.
Curt’s father, who is a retired pediatrician, said he’s showing signs of starting his final decline before passing on.
God bless you, Curt.
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Karl Baba
Trad climber
Yosemite, Ca
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Thanks Jennie
Having news of Curt helps us remember to send him good vibes in support of his limited remaining time.
Glad he knows we're thinking of him
Peace
Karl
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MisterE
Trad climber
Meeteetse, Wyoming
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Man, this is starting to feel like a death-watch.
Yuck. At least this, for me, allows some process after the tragedies of this last year.
Peace to you, Curt.
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johnboy
Trad climber
Can't get here from there
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Wishing you nothing but the easiest of transition.
Peace always be with you.
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Mtnmun
Trad climber
Top of the Mountain Mun
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Have a fine journey Curt, see you on the other side. Thanks for being you.
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Mimi
climber
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Thanks for the update, Jennie. Let's hope he's had his final rally and will let go soon. Maybe the full moon mojo tomorrow will work for him. He's a fighter, that's for sure.
Damn shame he has to go this way. We play the cards God dealt us. And he played pretty damned hard as far as I can tell. Hard to wish anyone a happy death. Godspeed into the next one.
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jstan
climber
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Stonewall Jackson's last words as he was dying of pneumonia were something like, "Strike the tent. Let us cross the stream and wait in the shade under the great oaks."
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Ghost
climber
A long way from where I started
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Godspeed into the next one.
Yeah, but just don't pay the ferryman until you're on the other side.
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klk
Trad climber
cali
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Under the great oaks
What a great phrase.
Jstan, don't know if that phrase is really Stonewall J (actually, I really hope it's just yr memory playin' tricks or, more likely, you accurately recalling what some memorialist sayin' what he thought his readers would've hoped SJ would've said), but Dirt belongs to the last generation whose language and thus thinking was profoundly shaped by the King James.
Under the Great Oaks!
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bluering
Trad climber
Santa Clara, Ca.
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God bless ya, Curt!
You were a strong voice here and are obviously a strong man. I say a prayer for you tonight, not because I have pity for you, but because I hope you stop feeling pain and am finally comforted.
You have always been strong, and strong-willed, but let go and embrace the light, bro.
You will be remembered here, brother. God bless ya!
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nita
climber
chica from chico, I don't claim to be a daisy
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Curt, I have appreciated your company and i will miss you. Sweet dreams my friend. Sending Love....
xo..nita
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jstan
climber
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Trust a damned historian to insist on accuracy. The source I read used the phrase "under the trees."
So I hedged by saying "something like." You were so caught by the oaks you missed that.
Stonewall had just had an arm amputated so I forgive him for his momentary confusion.
Stonewall was one of the most ferocious combatants in all of history so his ultimate acceptance of the end is the root message.
That ultimate acceptance prevents death from being a defeat.
Something none of us wants to see.
PS:
In a way we live our whole lives in preparation for that last moment. So that we might then honestly say, "I tried not to do harm."
Curt has prepared himself well.
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neebee
Social climber
calif/texas
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hey there jennie... say, thanks for the update...
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Curt
Boulder climber
Gilbert, AZ
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Ditto. Thanks, Jennie.
Curt
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dogtown
climber
Cheyenne,Wyoming
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Man;
You have many friends. It’s a good thing!
All the best, From the heart.
Dog.
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MH2
climber
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Times like this, you don't have to say anything.
Just be there.
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Chicken Skinner
Trad climber
Yosemite
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Curt, You were the person that figured out how to clean the paint spots from the Gunsight. Thanks for all your knowledge and help. We had a plan to bushwack together to climb anything. I hope it still happens wherever it may be. Hang tough dude,
Ken
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Jaybro
Social climber
Wolf City, Wyoming
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Thanks Curt and goood luck.
under the Oak Trees.
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Dick_Lugar
Trad climber
Indiana (the other Mideast)
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Although it's not a lead you asked for Curt, you have taken this lead on with much courage and dignity.
Thank you for showing us the way so when each and every one of us get handed the penultimate sharp end of the rope, we'll hopefully be as strong as you have been!
Condolensces to Curt's parents and family as I can't imagine what a heartache it is to watch one of your children passing on before you do...
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Double D
climber
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My thoughts and prayers go out to Curt, his friends and family. Thank you for the many smiles you've brought to this place and may God richly bless you.
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survival
Big Wall climber
A Token of My Extreme
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"River gonna take me, sing me sweet and sleepy
Sing me sweet and sleepy, all the way back home
It's a far gone lullaby, sung so many years ago
Momma momma many worlds I've come since I first left home
Going home, going home
By the waterside I will rest my bones
Listen to the river sing sweet songs
To rock my soul"
One of my favorite Robert Hunter verses of all time.
Dirt, thanks for hanging with us and providing so much insight,
inspiration and entertainment.
Thanks for the music bro.
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Jim Wilcox
Boulder climber
Santa Barbara
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"Too bad god does not exist, cause I could use the help, even from a jerk like I imagine him to be."
I've always envied those who were so firm in belief that moments like this caused little stress. In their eyes they're about to embark on the grandest adventure.
While my views may be similar to yours(except the "jerk" part), Curt, I find myself hoping we're both wrong.
Peace to you.
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Chaz
Trad climber
greater Boss Angeles area
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Save me a spot under those Great Oaks, Curt.
(assuming you get there before I do, no guarantees in this game)
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divad
Trad climber
wmass
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You sure added to the entertainment here, Curt.
Wish I'd known ya better.
Peace,
Dave
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Mighty Hiker
Social climber
Vancouver, B.C.
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I'm very sorry to hear that Curt's not doing well, and can only wish him such comfort as I can here. He is one of our characters, and I will miss his zany sense of humour ("The Fine Art of Screwing the Second" - http://www.supertopo.com/climbing/thread.html?topic_id=201089 - was one of the first I found and added to on ST), and his excoriation of the religious and of the right wing. And his practical help with things like graffiti-removal.
Thanks to jello for taking the time and trouble to visit Curt in Alabama last spring. Had we chosen an ambassador, we could hardly have chosen an apter one.
If it is the end, I hope that Curt's passing will not be painful, and will be a little eased by knowing that we're thinking of him and wishing him the best.
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charley
Trad climber
nw pa.
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Wishing you all the best, Curt.
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Anastasia
climber
hanging from a crimp and crying for my mama.
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Hugs to you Curt.
AF
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neebee
Social climber
calif/texas
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hey there all, say, just a bump...
i didn't want dirtineye/curt to slip out from view, here, during this hard time...
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dougs510
Social climber
down south
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Hey bud,
if you read this, know your an awesome dude. sorry about not getting the climbing trip it, but somehow i think we'll meet again, either in this place or the next. Hang tough, take courage, the best is yet to come :)
It's never over, just different. I least that's my belief.
Doug
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Mimi
climber
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Aug 14, 2009 - 11:28pm PT
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Is Curt still in this world?
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graniteclimber
Trad climber
Nowhere
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Aug 14, 2009 - 11:48pm PT
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Curt, we're going to miss you here. I loved how you gave the wingnuts hell here and hope you will continue to do so on the other side.
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neebee
Social climber
calif/texas
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Aug 15, 2009 - 12:27am PT
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hey there dirtineye/curt... still thinking about you, caring and praying... god bless...
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nature
climber
Tucson, AZ
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Aug 15, 2009 - 01:12am PT
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yo Curt... neither you nor I nor Summit believe in heaven. That said... when the time comes... if you happen to see her along your way... give her a kiss on the top of the head for me.
hang in there and thanks man...
~doug
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MisterE
Trad climber
Canoga Porn, CA
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Aug 15, 2009 - 01:21am PT
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Funny to see this - I was just asking Maidy about Curt today.
She said she would call in the next day or so and check in.
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Mighty Hiker
Social climber
Vancouver, B.C.
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Aug 15, 2009 - 01:22am PT
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I've been thinking of Curt every day, but had not dared to ask.
Edit: There's nothing on the Southeast Climbers' Coalition website.
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Mimi
climber
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Aug 15, 2009 - 02:05am PT
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Same here, Anders. I sincerely hope he's at peace now. I know how tough he is but to still be fighting more than a week later is beyond the call.
Condolences to his family and close friends if he has passed. I sent peony seeds to him once and his mother sent me a nice thank you card. How tough this battle must be for her. God bless.
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JOEY.F
Social climber
sebastopol
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Aug 15, 2009 - 02:29am PT
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"Best Wishes to Dirtineye"
Peace and Love,
the keyboard is not singing, but you will with the angels.
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Jaybro
Social climber
Wolf City, Wyoming
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Aug 15, 2009 - 02:32am PT
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I've been thinking about him too. I hope things are okay for him. I'm pretty much with Nature on this, I would love to think of Brutus, Bachar, Craig and Curt bouldering in the clouds while Midnight and Summit wag their tails and sniff each others butts. Alas, I just don't think that's how it works... that's okay, too.
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salad
climber
Escondido
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Aug 15, 2009 - 02:34am PT
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peace to you Curt.
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Jennie
Trad climber
Elk Creek, Idaho
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Topic Author's Reply - Aug 15, 2009 - 10:58am PT
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I wish I had better news but Curt's condition continues to deteriorate. Tom Dawson, his lifelong friend said they do not see how he can last much longer, although with Curt's willpower he could hang on for a number of days.
Last weekend he received a phone call from, his friend, the famous guitar maker John Gilbert. However, now he can barely speak and is too weak to hold the phone or feed himself. He complains of being hungry but seldom eats more than three or four bites.
He won't allow his folks to open his mail from well wishers and read the contents to him. That is so Curt.
He is sleeping most of the time but wakes occasionally and seems to recognize family and friends. He had a better day Thursday and ate more than usual and took a fairly good quantity of liquids.
His dad says he is very fragile and could go at any time. Sorry to be the person posting this, but his family believes his friends are entitled to know the truth.
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Mighty Hiker
Social climber
Vancouver, B.C.
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Aug 15, 2009 - 01:20pm PT
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Thanks, Jennie.
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Fletcher
Trad climber
Shivasana
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Aug 15, 2009 - 01:33pm PT
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Peace and hugs, Curt.
Eric
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jbar
Social climber
urasymptote
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Aug 15, 2009 - 01:54pm PT
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Thanks Jennie. Been wondering.
Curt if you get to catch any of this - I thought about you when I made a run through Foster falls and Sunset last week. Sure could have used your help getting a cam unstuck. It's fixed now. I know, I suck. I don't know if I told you this but I sent your music link to a sick friend who plays classical/folk guitar and told her what you wrote me about people not realizing that the greatest gratification in life comes in the service or others. It really helped motivate her to start playing and recording again. You have touched many lives my friend. God bless you.
Jeremy
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Zander
Trad climber
Berkeley
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Aug 16, 2009 - 12:45pm PT
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All the best to you, Dirt,
Zander
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BlueDragon
climber
Bay Area, CA
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Aug 17, 2009 - 12:55am PT
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I never met Curt, but thanks to this thread I read some of his posts like the thread on screwing the second. I laughed so hard tears were streaming down my face. he sure has a great sense of humor. I'm so very sorry that he is suffering so much.
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RRK
Trad climber
Talladega, Al
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Aug 19, 2009 - 09:12am PT
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I'm headed over this morning for what is likely the last visit. I talked to his mom yesterday afternoon and she felt like he would make it until today. They are bringing in family. Sorry to be out of touch on this but I've been up to my neck in my own reality for the past few weeks. I'll convey everyone's best wishes this morning.
RRK
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AbeFrohman
Trad climber
new york, NY
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Aug 19, 2009 - 10:35am PT
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peace, love, and all the best Dirt.
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Karl Baba
Trad climber
Yosemite, Ca
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Aug 19, 2009 - 11:29am PT
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Thanks for the update. Will keep Curt in mind and heart especially today.
Blessings
Karl
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MisterE
Trad climber
Canoga Porn, CA
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Aug 19, 2009 - 11:56am PT
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Thanks for the update, RRK
It's really nice of all of you to take the time to be there, I know it's not easy.
Erik
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jstan
climber
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Aug 19, 2009 - 11:56am PT
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May 29,2006
Quote
What you mutts don't understand, is that carrying too much gear is part of an art--
the art of screwing the parasitic second!
Consider, the second, who climbs the route on your dime, criticises your placments, carps about your speed, laughs at your weakness, short ropes you at a critical moment, forgets the beer, you name it.
But most importantly, he climbs without the extra weight of the rack.
So heres how it works.
YOU drag your huge rack up to the crux. YOU hang all excess gear at the crux. You pull the crux, and finish.
Now, when the slimeball smug second reaches the crux, he has to carry all the extra weight through it.
End Quote
Dirtineye
Thanks Curt.
JStannard
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healyje
Trad climber
Portland, Oregon
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Aug 19, 2009 - 12:27pm PT
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Irascible to the end...
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Mike Bolte
Trad climber
Planet Earth
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Aug 19, 2009 - 12:28pm PT
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Thanks RRK -
Fair winds for the next voyage Curt
best, Mike
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Brunosafari
Boulder climber
OR
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Aug 19, 2009 - 01:26pm PT
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This has been heart wrenching Jenny but thank you for keeping Curt present to us. Long ago I battled menningitus and not knowing what it was, it progressed until I could no longer speak or communicate. Yet my reasoning and inner thought was still very alive and vivid. I hope this is the experience of Curt, minus pain, and I hope that Curt is conversing with God on a level far beyond any of us here. God Bless our bright and gifted Curt and the greatest sympathy and love to his family and friends. - Bruce Adams
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couchmaster
climber
pdx
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Aug 19, 2009 - 01:27pm PT
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The D5 hammer project thread from 2008.
Feb 27, 2008, 01:44am PT
Author:
dirtineye
I'd like to bang at least a couple things with one of these wonder hammers before I die, then the hammer will go to Stegg or Corbett, or maybe Noffsinger. Stegg might lose it, Corbett probably won't apreciate it enough, but Noffsinger actually aid climbs as well as hand drills on free climbs so the stupid thing will have a happy home or at least the chance of one, if you get em done in time.
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neebee
Social climber
calif/texas
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Aug 19, 2009 - 01:35pm PT
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hey there jennie, say, thanks for the update...
he is not forgotten, that is for sure...
well, just a bump, for now...
and heart felt wishes for whereever they are needed now...
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Pappy
Ice climber
Warren, VT
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Aug 19, 2009 - 06:51pm PT
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Stegg, Arno, and Noffsinger went to see Curt on Sat. They called me so I could get in on the fun by phone, but I was out. Shannon said he was pretty well out of it, but I tried calling a couple of times on Sun. anyway, but, no dice. Talking to his Mom it was pretty clear that there isn't much time left and I may have missed my chance to say good bye when he could hear and appreciate it. Apparently I'm the butt of a good number of his stories in 'the Fine Art of Screwing the Second', which would be okay except that he failed to acknowledge that I taught him all that sh*t first. Certainly one of the more unique characters in a sport that has more than its share. never did get him out on the ice, though, that might have been a whole different experience.
Anyway Curt, Star went first, so she'll be there to lead the way again. Adios, amigo.
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jstan
climber
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Aug 19, 2009 - 07:15pm PT
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We must have a photo somewhere?
edit:
Thanks e.
Photobucket requires flash which I have avoided suspecting the application or the downloading of it makes one more vulnerable to hacking. I also run with all the executing scripts and connectivity turned off.
Anyway, still thanks.
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bluering
Trad climber
Santa Clara, Ca.
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Aug 19, 2009 - 07:46pm PT
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Curt, you're one of kind.
God bless ya, dude!
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RRK
Trad climber
Talladega, Al
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Aug 19, 2009 - 08:05pm PT
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Just got back from B'ham and Curt is still hanging in there. My guess is that the end will come when Curt decides it's time to go and not a moment before. If you have seen film of Stephen Hawking trying to communicate then you have a pretty good idea of where Curt is. He can hear and understand, though he is very medicated. When you listen to him for a bit then it gets easier to understand what he is saying.
I wish I had known that Shannon & Arno, etc were going over on Sat and I would have tried to hook up, though intervening medical emergencies in my family would almost certainly have derailed any plan. According to his mom their visit was very well received. I think that he may still have another day or two, especially if pretty ladies keep up the correspondence.
He's finished his album, and it's very good, though you can tell that his skills have suffered from the effects of the illness and medication. His mom had about a hundred at her house this afternoon, but I think that she plans on giving those out to visitors and well-wishers. Get in touch with her if you want to get one and she can tell you how to do it.
Here's a story on the ol' rascal and a picture if I can get it to post. A few years ago some of my buds came down to Tennessee from NC along with Jim Okel and Jim Corbett (Pappy on this board). We went to a beautiful little cove in East Tennessee on a spectacular spring weekend and found a big ol' hunk of rock where nobody had ever been. We were having an outstanding weekend, when at some point Dirt collared Pappy for a hike up the cove to scout some lines. They came back with Curt spewing about the best line since the invention of rocks. Pappy (wisely) missed out on the FA due to Curt's assessment of the need for at least thirty 6-inch cams, fifty pounds of iron and hammer, an anvil and forge, bivy gear, etc. That night he was hitting everyone up for the monster cams and wound up with a sack full. The next day Curt was partner-shopping for his historic first ascent. A climber's game of "musical chairs" ensued, and I was the one standing when the music stopped. Drats, I'd been conned again. Off we went, dragging a pack that was larger than I was. When I finally saw the line (dihedral fingers to a roof-crack traverse then a hand crack through the roof) I didn't see any place for a big cam, but said nothing since I wasn't the one taking the rope up. Curt started up and things started falling down - really big things like trees, tons of dirt and large rocks. I was being buried alive because he insisted on playing Martha Stewart by cleaning up everything within reach using a little wisk broom. I finally convinced him to let me climb above him and take the rope up so that he could finish mopping the floor. I got to the roof and it protected with 1 red camalot. Jeez - all that gear was just ballast. I don't usually name things but insisted on this one - "Sticks and Stones" - a monument to my suffering. The bushwack out was another adventure that put us late back to camp. My NC buds were due to be long gone back home, but when we got back to camp there they were, trying to decide if they should organize some sort of rescue.
Here's a shot from that trip, Curt playing a Dirtbag Serenade. What a great weekend.
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MisterE
Trad climber
Canoga Porn, CA
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Aug 19, 2009 - 09:49pm PT
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Glad to hear Curt is still with us.
Here's a picture of him with Shannon on his last trip to Laurel Knob, courtesy of Justthemaid:
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neebee
Social climber
calif/texas
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Aug 19, 2009 - 09:52pm PT
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hey there rrk... say, sometimes there is one last thing that a person is still not settled with, before they know to let go of life...
we can all be praying that curt's last thoughts are settled, so he will pass in peace...
perhaps tonight, we can all just give a joint effort of some sort... those of us that have seen this and read of his time being near...
*thanks for sharing about his music---i remember how much he wanted it all done...
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GDavis
Trad climber
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Aug 19, 2009 - 11:53pm PT
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Wow. How have I missed this thread...
Well, here is some perspective from someone who never got along with him (not even a teensy bit!) and just read the whole thread, all of his posts, from post 1 to 493.
Like I said, Dirt has always rubbed elbows with me in posts. I think we both enjoyed it a little bit too. We could always count on the other to say what we figured would be said, than point it out. "haha, I knew you would say that you curmudgeon/Rethug!"
I knew he was sick, a bit, but he didn't make any bones about so I figured it wouldn't be that bad. I mean, who could have that confidence? It seemed like he was at least at peace to himself, and I never thought much of the severity. It was when Ouch passed taht I thought about him again... I never followed the same posts as Dirt, and probably avoided reading what he wrote because I didn't like to argue with a guy who wasn't feeling to well.
Anyways... long story even longer...
If you read his posts, all of them, you get such a small insight into who this guy is, what he thinks, and most importantly how he thinks it. His music was beautiful too. That was the joke he pulled on me, for sure, because I did not expect that. And even with the obvious effects of chemo he was not a bad looking dude... in a strange way he seemed to still have his strength. It would not have surprised me much to see him walk outside after he played his guitar and crank a few pullups. He was built up in my mind maybe a bit like my Dad. Probably the same age, they both kind of... like to stir the pot, I guess. I don't love my dad any less, and its not something to judge, but it is the way life works. The wiring in his brain, programmed through whatever series of events in life, have made him who he is. Not even in very grim situations does he change who he is... he is as honest in the first post as the last. The difference is his understanding of intentions. He knew all along at least to some extent, but the kind things said by the group really meant a lot to him. I wish I saw this earlier, I would have said nice things too. I would like to think it would make him smile, maybe even laugh a bit.
Jello, RRK, Jennie, and those of you who have helped him out... maybe you don't believe in a God, that's beside the point. From my point of view, though, there is simply nothing on Earth which can reward such compassion. Its a simple, overused phrase, but for some reason a cocky, probably dumb kid with little or no perspective in life is brought to tears by a guy he couldn't stomach and by those who thought to take such great care of him... God Bless You.
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Hardman Knott
Gym climber
Muir Woods National Monument, Mill Valley, Ca
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Aug 20, 2009 - 12:18am PT
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GDavis wrote:
Its a simple, overused phrase, but for some reason a cocky, probably dumb kid with little or no perspective in life is brought to tears by a guy he couldn't stomach and by those who thought to take such great care of him... God Bless You.
I cried for the first time in years after talking to Curt on the phone - his predicament seems so cruel...
So many deaths these days., and yet pretty much all of them involved high-risk acivities
(including two best-friends I lost years ago),
but Curt's situation hit me in a way that is especially painful - and I don't really "know" him.
God Bless, indeed (I'm agnostic).
God Bless indeed.
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Karl Baba
Trad climber
Yosemite, Ca
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Aug 20, 2009 - 06:04am PT
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Some native americans had something of a war cry...a saying when anything could happen and probably was about to...
It's a good day to die!
It has to be so, because it comes down to that.
May it be a good day for Curt
Peace
Karl
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Norwegian
Trad climber
Placerville, California
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Aug 20, 2009 - 09:57am PT
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many times,
the encore is better than the show itself.
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Pappy
Ice climber
Warren, VT
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Aug 20, 2009 - 03:05pm PT
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bump
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RRK
Trad climber
Talladega, Al
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Aug 20, 2009 - 03:12pm PT
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Curt's still with us as of noon today. He had lots of company yesterday evening. I'm trying to clear things to go back over tomorrow. My best guess is that I won't be too late. I'll post up when I know something.
RRK
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Ghost
climber
A long way from where I started
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Aug 20, 2009 - 03:14pm PT
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Thanks RRK, both for keeping us posted, and for being there for Curt.
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Brian Hench
Trad climber
Laguna Beach, CA
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Aug 20, 2009 - 05:03pm PT
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I arrived on the ST scene too late to really get to know Curt, but I know what he's going though. My wife suffered from breast cancer for 8 years and finally succumbed to it on July 10. I was there when she passed. She hung on five years longer than her doctor had predicted. She wanted to see her kids complete their college education and she did.
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Norwegian
Trad climber
Placerville, California
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Aug 20, 2009 - 09:52pm PT
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there is peace on the other side.
there is. its black and its velvety.
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MisterE
Trad climber
Canoga Porn, CA
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Aug 20, 2009 - 10:02pm PT
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Been thinking about Curt all day today bump.
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Mimi
climber
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Aug 20, 2009 - 10:44pm PT
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Yep, Curt is one tough SOB. Makes me even sadder. This is just awful. At least when you die climbing, it's usually pretty quick.
May he finally be at peace.
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Zander
Trad climber
Berkeley
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Aug 20, 2009 - 10:53pm PT
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Hey Brian,
Best wishes to you, man.
Zander
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jstan
climber
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Aug 21, 2009 - 12:44am PT
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This is the part of life for which our lack of control is most clear. Our function is to appreciate what we have enjoyed and to prepare ourselves for its loss. All the while being clear, for now at least, we are not central to the issue. Everyone has to go through this for themselves, alone.
We are but in preparation.
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Curt
Boulder climber
Gilbert, AZ
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Aug 21, 2009 - 01:25am PT
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We have no control over our birth or our death--yet each and every one of us will most certainly experience both. The best we can hope for is to take more out of life than life takes out of us, in the intervening years.
Curt
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Mighty Hiker
Social climber
Vancouver, B.C.
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Aug 21, 2009 - 02:02am PT
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I've been thinking of Curt also. So I went to Squamish tonight and did some more graffiti removal, something I know that he enjoyed doing. And had a nice sunset at the Baldwin Ledge, alone with my thoughts and memories.
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justthemaid
climber
Los Angeles
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Aug 21, 2009 - 02:57am PT
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I have a really funny quote by Dirt written down somewheres addressing his actual plans for taking over Hell when he dies. I'll track it down.
Thought I'd post up this link of the last couple days that Curt was able to climb. It's an amusing trip report I wrote about about a trip we took to Palisades and Laurel Knob with Shannon and RRK. Lots of pics. Mr. E posted one of the pics earlier.
http://www.supertopo.com/climbing/thread.html?topic_id=724731
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RRK
Trad climber
Talladega, Al
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Aug 21, 2009 - 11:41am PT
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Thanks Skip - I wish that I could have come along on the second leg of that weekend. I do regret not putting the real world aside for just one more day. I have spent a good bit of time lately reflecting on my friendship with Curt, particularly since getting a copy of his new disk. I have a disk titled “Curt Johnson 2007" which is in the player in my car. Though not at the absolute top of his game at that time, the guitar work on the 2007 disk is absolutely astonishing. In contrast, the new disk, “Over and Done”, is not Curt Johnson at the pinnacle of his abilities, but rather Curt Johnson battling the forces which are overwhelming him. Please don’t misunderstand, “Over and Done” is an excellent work. You will likely never hear anything else like it. However the thing that is communicated so powerfully in this new work is the force of Curt’s will. It is a monument to his ability to stand at the very edge of life and demand that his body do something impossible. Though I should prefer the earlier work over the latter, the fact is that I do not. For me this is a very puzzling realization.
Though I have learned so many things through our friendship, this last lesson, given in the very last days of his life, is a fundamental one for me. I now realize - in a way that I never have before - that art does not flow from technical virtuosity as it does from the struggle against limitations. It is not about what you can do, but rather about what you want to do but can’t. From this epiphany (Curt-iphany?) I am beginning to understand that my preference for the latter work is because it represents art in a way that the other, more technically brilliant work, could not.
Now I find myself considering whether I must recant my position on rock climbing as art. For me climbing has always been a silly game that I played with my friends. It is satisfying in a way that nothing else has ever been, but I felt pretentious calling it art. I would never give any sort of name to a route (with just a few exceptions) - preferring something descriptive of the location or just nothing at all. I don’t fault people for feeling that they have some sort of possessory interest in a route, but I never entertained that notion for myself. I may be wrong about that. I have always realized that climbing was about the journey, not the destination. However the struggle that is inherent in climbing may in fact produce art in the same way that Curt’s struggle to create music has done. The route may in fact be a valid statement of the force of human will. Enough already. All this pondering is making my head hurt. I’ll just put these thoughts away and try to reconcile all this at some point in the future. For now I’ll just head over to see the old goat and tell him that he’s managed to simultaneously confound me and make my life better - again.
RRK
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RRK
Trad climber
Talladega, Al
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Aug 22, 2009 - 01:39pm PT
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Curt's still with us today as of just a few minutes ago but had a very rough night and is on oxy with increased dosage of pain meds. He's not eating much - he got down a couple of spoons of RRK's famous apple butter with cabernet and ginger last night but basically is on liquids. I recommended 100 year old scotch which I know for a fact that he would guzzle but I'm not driving this train so it was just a suggestion. (His mother did say that they knocked off a bottle together when the last of the bad news came around but that was some time ago) I think that he's still clear in his mind - you can see it in his eyes - but he just can't speak due to the very heavy medication. I told him yesterday that he's got nothing left to prove but then again he never listened to me or anyone else. If he makes it through the weekend I'll go over again Monday or Tuesday. Now's the time to get in touch if you've been putting it off. Regret stays with you forever.
RRK
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neebee
Social climber
calif/texas
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Aug 22, 2009 - 01:51pm PT
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hey there say, rrk.... i can't afford to call again... if you get over there and see him in time, give him a thank you for sharing his love for his pear-dessert recipe (he shared how he really loves that stuff)... and a greeting from neebee... and that i'm still praying...
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Jennie
Trad climber
Elk Creek, Idaho
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Topic Author's Reply - Aug 22, 2009 - 01:58pm PT
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Thanks for the updates, RRK. Thanks to you and Skip and Mister E for the great photos. I know Curt and his family appreciate the prayers and kind thoughts expressed on ST forum.
Curt's mom told me this morning he had a bad night. I wanted to tell Curt what I thought of his last CD but the post office hasn't delivered it yet. Curt has a great passion for life and is holding on to it tenaciously. I believe he's still hoping for the miracle, (I surely am).
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HighDesertDJ
Trad climber
Arid-zona
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Aug 22, 2009 - 01:58pm PT
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Good luck Curt. Thanks for sharing yourself with us.
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SteveW
Trad climber
The state of confusion
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Aug 22, 2009 - 02:43pm PT
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Best wishes Curt.
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Redwreck
Social climber
Echo Parque, Los Angeles, CA
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Aug 22, 2009 - 04:30pm PT
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Curt's a treasure, and his loss will diminish us all.
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Bob D'A
Trad climber
Boulder, CO
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Aug 22, 2009 - 05:10pm PT
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Curt...hope your journey is a peaceful one. I have missed you posting on the wildflower thread...your shots were beautiful.
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RRK
Trad climber
Talladega, Al
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Aug 22, 2009 - 05:23pm PT
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Neebee I will and thank you. You are a sweetheart. You too Jennie and Skip. Here's a pic. Hold on to you hearts ladies 'cause The Dirt's ready to go steppin'. This from yesterday, which was a pretty good day all things considered (followed by a rough night). Maybe there will be a good one tomorrow. Neebee would you share the pear recipe?
hmm I'll have to rethink this or maybe someone can get the link and do it for me. My old web site changed somehow and I can't upload so I tried to do it from a facebook page. I'll get back with you. I hate problem-solving. I deleted the image tags so that the link will post. Maybe somebody can do the hookup for me. They didn't teach this in third grade/ lets try a flickr page
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Curt
Boulder climber
Gilbert, AZ
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Aug 23, 2009 - 12:33am PT
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That's one tough SOB--and I mean no offense to his mother, I mean metaphorically.
The other Curt
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Todd Gordon
Trad climber
Joshua Tree, Cal
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Aug 23, 2009 - 01:22am PT
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I'm re-posting again a picture of a first ascent we did last year called Dirtineye.....Curt seemed surprised and pleased we named a climb after his supertopo cyber name.......Dirtineye (5.9+).....an very cool climb in a very awesome secret place high on Queen Mountain in Joshua Tree Nat. Park.......a fantastic climb for a fantastic spirit......sleep well and sleep in peace.
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neebee
Social climber
calif/texas
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Aug 23, 2009 - 06:57am PT
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hey there say, todd... great share... bump for dirtineye's named route...
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justthemaid
climber
Los Angeles
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Aug 23, 2009 - 10:08am PT
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A few of Curt's garden pics:
A stained glass window I made that was inspired by that last pic. I did one of the lilies as well and mailed it off to him for Christmas one year.
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RRK
Trad climber
Talladega, Al
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Aug 23, 2009 - 08:05pm PT
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Curt's still with us as of 7:00 p.m. CDT but is declining. His mother advised me to call tomorrow before trying to come over which sounded ominous to me. He's still alert and able to recognize people. I'll do my best to put the rest of the world on hold and take one more swing at it tomorrow.
On a related note, Curt dug some ginger lillies for us a few years ago. They have flourished but never bloomed. This evening Cassie said "look at that - the ginger lillies have a bloom." Not only did the planting have a bloom, but had numerous buds ready to break. Must be karma flowing from Ol' Dirt. I'll try to take a pic and post up sometime in the next few. Maybe it will be an inspiration for Maidy to create another masterpiece.
RRK
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SteveW
Trad climber
The state of confusion
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Aug 23, 2009 - 09:00pm PT
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Jtm
I love the sweetgum leaves. That's one tree I really
miss from the east. Your glass is gorgeous.
Best to Curt.
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jstan
climber
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Aug 23, 2009 - 09:02pm PT
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Knowing yourself to be ignorant, is the first test of wisdom.
JTM your work, to me, is superb. And for me, anything you do is now joined to Curt, a wonderfully courageous and giving man.
If you will, let me know sometime when you and Eric plan to come to JT. We can provide a basecamp, if you would like it.
Edit:
New thread please.
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Jennie
Trad climber
Elk Creek, Idaho
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Topic Author's Reply - Aug 23, 2009 - 11:33pm PT
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I received word from Tom that Curt has passed on.
God bless you Curt, thanks for being a friend to so many,
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zip
Trad climber
pacific beach, ca
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Aug 23, 2009 - 11:35pm PT
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Didn't know the man, but am relieved that he is no longer in pain.
Hope he is at peace.
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Brian
climber
Cali
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Aug 23, 2009 - 11:41pm PT
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Requiscat in pace.
Brian
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dfrost7
Social climber
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Aug 23, 2009 - 11:46pm PT
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t*r, good idea. Condolences to his family and all who love him. Rest in peace, Curt.
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Jello
Social climber
No Ut
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Aug 23, 2009 - 11:48pm PT
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Good bye, good buddy. Curt, I feel so fortunate to have known you.
-Jeff Lowe
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Jim Wilcox
Boulder climber
Santa Barbara
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Aug 23, 2009 - 11:52pm PT
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Farewell, Curt. Your composure these last few months was inspirational.
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neebee
Social climber
calif/texas
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Aug 23, 2009 - 11:55pm PT
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hey there dear jennie, say, i am sending all my hugs to you, this was hard for you to post this i know... :(
and to rrk:
that was a lovely post about the lilies...
dear curt... sending my love from dear jesus, to be displayed about you... thank you for the small bits of supertopo friendship, and i will pray for your mom as she goes through this hard time...
say--we all sent you our "best shots" as we knew you were to pass-over, only you, really know how much we helped you... we won't know until our turn comes ones day...
sending you best wishes and good byes, from here...
the good lord takes the pain now...
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Jennie
Trad climber
Elk Creek, Idaho
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Topic Author's Reply - Aug 23, 2009 - 11:57pm PT
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Curt Johnson was born Oct 4, 1955.
Anyone who wants to post a memorial thread please go ahead. I'm at a loss for writing an opening post right now
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Jaybro
Social climber
Wolf City, Wyoming
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Aug 24, 2009 - 12:01am PT
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Time to rest, Curt. Condolences, all.
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Jennie
Trad climber
Elk Creek, Idaho
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Topic Author's Reply - Aug 24, 2009 - 12:01am PT
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Thanks t*r, I appreciate your posts. Curts last name is Johnson.
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