I haven't heard from my son in a month

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Messages 1 - 49 of total 49 in this topic
Banquo

climber
Amerricka
Topic Author's Original Post - Oct 22, 2012 - 01:03pm PT
I sent him off to a NOLS course in Patagonia. He called me from Coyhaique on September 22 and said he was good and getting to know the others in his group. No news since. I know it would be bad news if we did hear from him but it is very disconcerting to not have any contact with him. I am dying to hear all about it. He turned 21 last week. He should be home for Christmas.
Taken 1-7-2012. Bairs Creek approach to Mt. Williamson.
Taken 1-7-2012. Bairs Creek approach to Mt. Williamson.
Credit: Banquo
Dingus Milktoast

Gym climber
And every fool knows, a dog needs a home, and...
Oct 22, 2012 - 01:06pm PT
He looks pretty solid to me. I bet he's having an amazing time.

DMT
TwistedCrank

climber
Dingleberry Gulch, Ideeho
Oct 22, 2012 - 01:10pm PT
I'm a NOLS grad and there are a few NOLS affiliates here as well. I was off the grid for 5 weeks once on a course. I know my parents worried hard. It's part of the job.

He's in good hands and NOLS instills a solid ethic. Be envious, but be concerned like any good parent should.



I've been thinking about sending my teenager on one of those.
schilds

Trad climber
eastside
Oct 22, 2012 - 02:05pm PT
I was lucky enough to do the semester in Patagonia course 12 years ago, and at least at that time, we resupplied in the field and had no opportunity for phone contact until we were back in Coyhaique. I know I didn't shower for 80 days, so I think that coincided with phone availability too...so don't worry, he's having the time of his life! Also, they do have enough communications (e.g. radios, EPIRB, etc.) to arrange for a rescue if needed, as it was on our course, so no news is good news in this case:) I hope he takes great photos...and tell him to bring home some "manjar", which he will no doubt be addicted to by the end of the course and which is very hard to find here.
mountainlion

Trad climber
California
Oct 22, 2012 - 03:00pm PT
Banquo get a grip man. Your son is a man now. He's out having fun and living life. If he calls home it's a bonus. Most likely he's to far from a phone and couldn't tell you what day it was on a bet. Catch up with him at Christmas.


Peace Eric
Norton

Social climber
the Wastelands
Oct 22, 2012 - 03:11pm PT
isn't there someone you could call on the phone or email just to find out if he is ok and the adventure is proceeding according to plan?

surely there is a contact point, just a concerned father checking in?
MissJ

Social climber
Oct 22, 2012 - 03:28pm PT
Banquo, as a parent who has not heard from her son in 9 months (tho he not be climbing) I know the anxiety and worry you must be feeling. I pray he is safe and just wanting to prove he can handle some situations on his own. Hope he calls you soon.
SCseagoat

Trad climber
Santa Cruz
Oct 22, 2012 - 03:30pm PT
As the mom of a son the same age as yours I know the anxiety. I hate it when long periods go by.. Hope you hear soon....but the adage "no news is good news" usually is true!



Susan
Jon Beck

Trad climber
Oceanside
Oct 22, 2012 - 03:34pm PT
I used to do that to my parents, my dad had the police knocking on my door once, that fixed the communication breakdown. Now as a parent I feel guilty about that.

I am sure your son is fine, be proud!
Banquo

climber
Amerricka
Topic Author's Reply - Oct 22, 2012 - 03:38pm PT
I'm not worried about him, it's just strange to not hear from him. In today's world we are accustomed to hearing from people no matter where they are.

In 1981 I decided to go on a trip. I bought a ticket across the pond. On my way to SFO I stopped by my parent's house and told mom I was going and didn't know when I would be back or where I was going. She cried and gave me a $100 bill she had stashed away. I was gone for a year and made my way all the way around the globe.

In those days there was no internet and mail typically took a week or more each way. I sent her a few letters and called her once from India. The phone call took all day to make. Not only did she not hear from me for a month or more at a time, she had no idea where I was. I think I caused her a lot of distress. She told me later that she had regularly sent letters to GPO's all over the Middle East and Asia to places she thought I might visit.

I think he is safe enough.
Tami

Social climber
Canada
Oct 22, 2012 - 04:09pm PT
When I was 26 I buggered off to Africa with a female travellin' companion, 22 years old, and went out of contact with my folks for eight or nine weeks. Drove 'em nuts. So I can totally relate.

My son is also the same age as yours and in the military. I anticipate there may well be times in his future I'm greatly concerned about his well-being.

Then again, it's my 21 y/o daughter who goes off to a party involving a rugby team, out of contact for 2 hrs and I'm really up on two wheels................

No wonder I gots all this grey hair.....

I look fwd to seeing this thread in the future with some great stories.

sullly

Trad climber
Oct 22, 2012 - 04:31pm PT
Banquo, You're forgetting the storyline. Your son, Fleance, survives to father a line of kings. Three witches predicted it. This witch (who was of woman born) believes your son will contact you shortly.
Banquo

climber
Amerricka
Topic Author's Reply - Oct 22, 2012 - 04:33pm PT
Sully, somebody has to have me murdered 1st.
healyje

Trad climber
Portland, Oregon
Oct 22, 2012 - 04:34pm PT
Our daughter up in Seattle lost her iPhone and it took four weeks for her iPhone 5 to arrive. I think she and my wife only barely survived the ordeal.
MarkGrubb

climber
Oct 22, 2012 - 04:35pm PT
Parents:

You raised them. If you believe you did a Good Job, instilled some personal responsibility, life skills, and helped them develop some common sense then Cowboy/girl up and have some Faith!

My Dad was gone from home during WWII for the duration of that event and another year doing occupation work in Korea. Essentially no contact with family. I used to work in the Guiana Highlands for 9 months at a time with essentially no contact.

Dealing with your own situation and living in the moment is good for people. Staying attached to that world you left behind cheapens the experience you went away to have.

Modern comm's are an addiction. Many adolescents of today can hardly take a piss without texting Mom to see if it OK....

Banquo

climber
Amerricka
Topic Author's Reply - Oct 22, 2012 - 04:46pm PT
Tami-

Is your son a submariner? I think I heard so anyway. He must be out of contact sometimes.
LilaBiene

Trad climber
Oct 22, 2012 - 06:05pm PT
My younger brother disappears overseas for a month or two every winter...and comes back with a smile you just know means he had more fun than he'll ever let on...

I wish the same for your son! Lucky kid to have such a great dad.
LuckyPink

climber
the last bivy
Oct 22, 2012 - 06:12pm PT
eek! on the other hand , I can't hide from my kids for even 24 damn hours.

really though, I hate it when I don't hear from them. hang in B. there are some good posts here.
Anastasia

climber
InLOVEwithAris.
Oct 22, 2012 - 07:34pm PT
I also am guilty. I was usually too far out to be near a phone or it cost too much to use. It also was a good thing since when I did get to use a phone, I would end up having an argument with my mother. She wanted me back NOW, I shouldn't be in places without phones, I should pay the BIG amount even though it would mean leaving me without money to survive, etc.


Later in life when my Dad was alive... It was I who would call him when he was out too late. Dad thought that was hilarious.

AFS
H

Mountain climber
there and back again
Oct 22, 2012 - 07:51pm PT
Banquo,I have spent a lot of time away from my folks on wild escapades. On most of my expeditions I was away for many weeks doing stuff they had every right to be worried about. Unlike my past experiences he is in good hands. My mom finally stopped asking where I have been and what I was going to do next. Now, my son is pulling the same sheet. Thank God he is a facebook addict so I can check up on him.

Not hearing from our kids usually means they're cool. Good luck and hang in there Bro.
Tami

Social climber
Canada
Oct 22, 2012 - 08:00pm PT
Banquo - Subs? Not yet. Has volunteered for that service but must do that 2x before being considered to train for the Dolphins. Rite now he's just Navy :-)


TGT

Social climber
So Cal
Oct 22, 2012 - 08:11pm PT
Well, could be worse,

and have the first call in months interrupted by someone shooting at him!
giegs

climber
Tardistan
Oct 22, 2012 - 08:19pm PT
I almost went on a NOLS trip back in the day. Bought my first car and went on a fishing trip in Alaska instead. I work with and go to conferences with a bunch of NOLS grads and still occasionally wish I had gone the other way. It's very rare I meet a grad I don't at least get along with.
neebee

Social climber
calif/texas
Oct 22, 2012 - 08:55pm PT
hey there say, banquo... will be keeping him in prayes, too...

say, just letting you know, you are not alone through all this...

god bless...

praying for open-doors of info, too, to come your way, soon...
:)
nita

Social climber
chica de chico, I don't claim to be a daisy.
Oct 22, 2012 - 09:41pm PT
I'm so guilty of freaking my parents out when i was in my twenties...To this day... i have tried to make up for my wayward wanderlust ways.

Banquo,I'm sure your son is in good hands and i hope you hear from him soon.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=wx4AATLY7L8
Norwegian

Trad climber
Placerville, California
Oct 23, 2012 - 03:19am PT
time jus wansta sit quietly
down and fold her wings closed.
wrest and rebuild chronic relations;

we kick her back into action,
"speak!" we demand.
"tell all."
"quantify!"

she is an elusive spirit,
for though she marches on, mechanically,
our manic fascination with her,
superscedes our peaceful surrender
to her,
and thus we wither upon atomic chance,
when all she wants of us
is a playful dance.

banquo i think that your
boy might be beyond the spell
that plagues us civic marchers.

it always happens when we
achieve mountain time.
Bill Thompson

Ice climber
Marquette
Oct 23, 2012 - 03:33am PT
Tami....from a former rugby player you should be nervous. Keep her away!
Spider Savage

Mountain climber
The shaggy fringe of Los Angeles
Oct 23, 2012 - 07:03am PT
Dude prolly met a girl.
TwistedCrank

climber
Dingleberry Gulch, Ideeho
Oct 23, 2012 - 07:20am PT
I think about the hell I must have put my parents though when I was living the dream. aka on the escapade. Even with the NOLS "grounding" my parents paid for, I still had a primal urge to go "out there" and not tell my parents about it or let them know what I was doing and how I was doing it and for extended periods of time.

So now I've got a kid who's seeing the horizon and wondering what's on the other side. I fully expect her to go out there. I fully expect for me to chew my nails worrying about her. Fakking parenting. Pff.

Paybacks are a bitch.

Banquo

climber
Amerricka
Topic Author's Reply - Oct 23, 2012 - 12:10pm PT
banquo i think that your
boy might be beyond the spell
that plagues us civic marchers.

I hope so
Banquo

climber
Amerricka
Topic Author's Reply - Dec 10, 2012 - 07:58pm PT
He seems to have survived.
Credit: Banquo

My daughter and wife went down to meet him. I'm home with the cat having frozen pizza for dinner.
Credit: Banquo
SCseagoat

Trad climber
Santa Cruz
Dec 10, 2012 - 08:26pm PT
How neat! Phew!

Susan
bluering

Trad climber
Santa Clara, CA
Dec 10, 2012 - 08:43pm PT
That's rad! And relieving!!!!!

I'm sure you're a happy dad. And you f*#king should be~!

Merry Christmas!
Dingus Milktoast

Gym climber
And every fool knows, a dog needs a home, and...
Dec 11, 2012 - 05:42am PT
Nice.

DMT
Leggs

Sport climber
A true CA girl, who landed in the desert...
Dec 11, 2012 - 05:51am PT
MOST excellent! And the two photos you shared... ahhhhhhh, the smiles of enjoying life to the fullest.

~peace, Leggs
TwistedCrank

climber
Dingleberry Gulch, Ideeho
Dec 11, 2012 - 06:31am PT
He looks happy.
neebee

Social climber
calif/texas
Dec 11, 2012 - 07:33am PT
hey there, say.... whewwwwwwww.. and: thank god...

i a so very happy for you to have this blessing...
:)
happiegrrrl

Trad climber
www.climbaddictdesigns.com
Dec 11, 2012 - 07:38am PT
A nice holiday present for you Banquo! Glad you have the update and I bet that frozen pizza tasted damned good now that the worry has been lifted.
Banquo

climber
Amerricka
Topic Author's Reply - Dec 11, 2012 - 09:55am PT
Thanks for the kind words. I wish I could have gone down but I think I will get around to that one day.
Cragman

Trad climber
June Lake, California....via the Damascus Road
Dec 11, 2012 - 10:00am PT
What a beautiful Merry Christmas present!

TFPU!
Tami

Social climber
Canada
Dec 11, 2012 - 12:05pm PT
So Banquo - Can you tell the story of why he went incommunicado for so long?
Silver

Gym climber
Dec 11, 2012 - 12:14pm PT
Great news !
tiki-jer

Trad climber
fresno/clovis
Dec 11, 2012 - 12:27pm PT
That IS great news!! Merry Christmas Banquo!
LilaBiene

Trad climber
Dec 11, 2012 - 03:37pm PT
Look at that smile!!! It's coming from the inside...awesome.
dee ee

Mountain climber
citizen of planet Earth
Dec 11, 2012 - 05:32pm PT
You should have gone down there too! Full family action.
bajaandy

climber
Escondido, CA
Dec 11, 2012 - 07:10pm PT
HELL YA! That's so rad!
phylp

Trad climber
Millbrae, CA
Dec 11, 2012 - 08:30pm PT
Thanks for the update, Banquo! So happy for you that you have your son safe and sound.
Banquo

climber
Amerricka
Topic Author's Reply - Dec 11, 2012 - 08:53pm PT
Tami-

He was on a NOLS semester in Patagonia program. They take them into the boonies and they don't come out until it is over. They resupply in the field. No cell phones, no computers, no internet, no ipods, no electronics. Good thing I think. Reminds me of when I was a kid in Northern Idaho, we didn't have any of that stuff either.
Banquo

climber
Amerricka
Topic Author's Reply - Dec 11, 2012 - 08:56pm PT
You should have gone down there too! Full family action.

Yeah, I would have but this week is the end of lectures and the beginning of finals at the university where I teach. Hard time for me to get away.
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