The piercing buzz of my alarm clock drove me out of my deep, Saturday slumber. I rolled over and the clock displayed the object of my discomfort- 7:45 AM. On a Saturday?! F#@k it. I rolled over and slept for another half hour.

Adamame and I started for Pinnacles National Monument (an area known for its rock quality) with the sole intention of putting to rest a pair of projects that have been plaguing us for months. Half way through our voyage, we had a sudden change of heart: as if a light bulb had flickered on in our collective subconscious illuminating trails of adventure never seen or sought before. What good is projecting the life out of a climb when all that is to be gained upon one's success is a paltry hundred feet of climbing? Rock climbing is about going places- and oh the places we were fixing to go that day!

The Goal: To climb ten 5.10s and eleven 5.11s in Bear Gulch in a single day. The eleven 11s linkup is revered by such figures as Tom Davis, the owner of the local climbing gym who considered it quite the feat. We decided to up the ante.
We rolled into the parking lot at 10:30AM and were ready for action. Fueled by Albright's Donuts, we sprinted to the trailhead like soldiers charging an enemy bunker: gear clattering and clanging and turning the head of many an obese hiker.
“You have the rope, right?” Adam asked as we reached the trail.
“I thought you had it.” I replied.

We had already made complete fools of ourselves in front of throngs of tourists, and neither of us wanted to take the walk of shame back to the car. Luckily, my bowels required the purging of the aforementioned donuts, so Adam stealthy made the journey back for the rope while I sat on a porcelain throne.

We quickly found ourselves at the foot of the grand Vasquez Monolith and Adam prepared to lead the first route: Terranean Tango (10a). Notice Adam has his shirt on in this photo. This was quickly changed when a group of girls walked by without hooting and hollering at him. Figuring that this venture required copious amounts of appraisal and attention (hence my posting it here), off came the shirts (it was also really hot).
Next was my first lead: POD (11a). This was the first rap-bolted route at the pinnacles. I chopped the bolts on the way down.
Adam's second lead was Foreplay (11b), a lead-bolted route put up by some of our bro-hams. The name rang quite true, as the sun-shimmered sweat on Adam's muscular back was sure to arouse any passerby. Adam almost blew his load a little too early as he barely hung on after botching a normally easy sequence after the last bolt: sweat pouring out of his pores like rain.
My second lead, Hawaiian noises (10d), is known for its unnecessary run-outs from the ground to the first bolt and from the last bolt to the top. Luckily, I have the nerves of a gladiator and the strength of a bull, and laughed in the face of mild danger (and could have grabbed the rappel rope of a party of n00bz if needed.
Next, Adam lead Richnach's Revenge (11a). He was surprised that after 16 years of climbing at the Pinns, he had never done such a great route!
I then lead Feed the Beast (11c). I defied the beast by turning around for a glamor shot, but he is a mean beast and punished me with a smattering of forearm pump.
I moved due right and lead Cantaloupe Death (10c). It was also rap bolted, so out came the bolts!
Next, Adam fired the seldom tried Bad Bolts AKA hard variation (10c). He cruised the crux just as Munge wandered by and snapped a shot.
Next, I lead Rocket in My Pocket (10d). This proved to be the psychological crux of the day as I accidentally didn't leave enough tail in my figure 8 to tie a back up knot. The sheer speed of our mega-link did not permit me to retie, and consequentially, I spent the next 5 minutes wondering in terror if it would hold in the event of a fall. Luckily, I did not fall, thus upholding our record of no falls to that point. Also interesting to note is that the ROCKET used on the first ascent was a power drill. We decided not to chop the bolts, because the climb was boldly bolted on stance.
We continued our circumnavigation of the monolith to our first Non-Monolith route: Sunwheel (11a). Adam cruised it, though the crux of this climb was the least solid I felt all day, and involved a long move off of a small, slopey side pull. Sunwheel is uncharacteristically crimpy for the Pinns, and is an awesome route,
Next came the technical crux of the day: Black Dagger (11d). As Adam followed, his hands began to cramp, and, with the no-falls link threatened, pulled through on ethos alone: begging me to divulge the sequence aloud.
The next climb got the undisputed “Pile of the Day” award- Pearl Sheath (10b). This photo says it all.
Then came the most daring route of the day, Deadpoint (11a), which requires a leap of faith across a chasm promising a 30 foot fall and near certain death to climbers that don't stick the grab. As a pack of local Hispanics looked on, I made the jump.
No falls as of yet, and only 8 routes to go. So hi ho, hi ho, of to the Disco Wall we go.

First, I lead Power Point (11d) which consists of a powerful boulder problem down low to easier climbing. It's kind of a gimme at the grade if you can boulder, so all you gym rats-go tick it off and log it on your 8a scorecards.
Adam lead the classic warm-up, Stupendous Man (10a).
I lead The Verdict (11a/b depending on the guidebook). It was insanely fun.

Next came Broken Arrow (10d). Both of us were surprised to have missed this one before the link-up, as it was later to receive the “most fun new route” award. I didn't get a photo of it, but wholeheartedly assure you of our authenticity.

Next came the enduro-crux Cosmos (11b), after having to walk down from the top of the monolith barefoot after being unable to rap Broken Arrow. It is a glorious climb with a spectacular roof midway that requires crimping and heel hooks. While climbing the route- I gallantly claimed “I like my women like I like my bolts- old and rusty!”
We decided to do a more obscure route- Denied (10d) put up by none other than Mr. Mud himself. Adam cruised up this lichen-encrusted adventure route. While following, I was almost denied the no-falls link on the final crux bulge by breaking a large foothold- tenuously holding a swing off of 2 slopey knobs.
2 more to go! The end was in sight! We reached the Tourist Trap, and out came the headlamps.

I lead Pickpocket (11a) by head torch. Climbing at the Pinnacles is much more difficult in the dark as it is hard to discern which footholds might break-sending your dreams of a 21 route link up to the deck with your headlamp.

Finally, Adam lead Angstrom's Away (10a) and I followed, fulfilling our destiny of the ten 10s and eleven 11s link up!
We finished with a car to car time of 8:30. Both of us freed every route with no falls. It was amazing how many classic routes we climbed within a five minute walk. They said it couldn’t be done, but when did we ever listen to what they say?
We had a celebratory feast at Super Taqueria in Hollister and headed back to Santa Cruz.
We made our way to Joe's house where a birthday dance party was being held for Nic. The keg was flowing, and good times were had by all. I tried to redpoint my dating-project, Genoa, but she was having none of it, as usual.