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Ouch!
climber
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Topic Author's Original Post - Sep 7, 2005 - 02:35am PT
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maculated
Trad climber
San Luis Obispo, CA
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Don't step on my blue suede shoes.
Ouch, I am impressed with the liberal use of all posted photos of me. :)
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Ouch!
climber
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Topic Author's Reply - Sep 7, 2005 - 03:18am PT
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You're a good subject, Mac. You have a great sense of humor, I think. Otherwise, I would have been whacked. :-)
You have some great pictures posted here. Taking liberties with them just seems the thing to do. Fershizzles.
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macgyver
Social climber
Oregon, but now in Europe
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I want a legit photo of the current Werner...what does this hardman look like. He is nowhere on the YOSAR site...then again...he could be...
rock
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Wrathchild
Big Wall climber
Lee NH
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OOHHH, MAAAN,
You're the shizznick!
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mark miller
Social climber
Reno
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W.B. pretty much looks like that except his feet do point in the normal forward direction, and he looks more fit, especially when he cruises what youv'e been hanging your way up for 2 years at the cookie.
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Karl Baba
Trad climber
Yosemite, Ca
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Werner is the greatest!
But his feet do not face the way other mortals do. Ever watch him walk? It's a subtle thing but his posture and gait fortell that he is wicked strong and in touch with his entire physical state. Hard to define but there is a springy, kung fu sort of grace to it.
He has a wealth of other extraordinary virtues as well, but I'm willing to bet that he is a crappy singer.
Peace
karl
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Ouch!
climber
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Topic Author's Reply - Sep 7, 2005 - 12:11pm PT
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Last time I saw Werner was when he came by for Sunday dinner of baked possum and sweet taters. That's him in the back.
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Shack
Social climber
So. Cal.
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I think Werner doesn't want to be found!
I tried to find him my last trip up there,
to invite him to the ISTC in the meadow.
I even sent a couple of messages thru SAR members,
but to no avail!
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Ouch!
climber
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Topic Author's Reply - Sep 7, 2005 - 02:29pm PT
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I heard about that, Shack. I believe when you were there, he had gone to a baseball game with Ol' #46.
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WBraun
climber
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Not true shack, I came looking for you and it was too late back then. It has been so busy this year for me.
Right now at this moment we have another big ass search going for some guy out by 10 lakes area named Zheng. Anybody seen him?
Gota run, ....later man ....
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Shack
Social climber
So. Cal.
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I know Werner, I'm just giving you a hard time...
Next time I will find you though!!
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Ouch!
climber
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Topic Author's Reply - Sep 7, 2005 - 04:03pm PT
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Shack
Social climber
So. Cal.
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Oh noooo! Bear 46 has an AK!!
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AKutzer
Trad climber
From Texas to Tahoe
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I'll bet it took him awhile to find an AK-46
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Shack
Social climber
So. Cal.
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"The Right to Arm Bears"
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Ouch!
climber
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Topic Author's Reply - Sep 7, 2005 - 05:51pm PT
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Werner is trollproof. Sometimes I feel like a swatted mosquito.
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Shack
Social climber
So. Cal.
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"Discount Rescue" what a great concept!
Climber on the radio: "Help! Help! I need a rescue!"
Ranger: "Thank you for calling 'Discount Rescue'...Would you like the 'Deluxe Rescue' or the bargain rescue package?....
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Jaybro
Social climber
The West
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-Karl
We refered to it as the Werner 'bop.' Part Groucho Marx, all his.
Even on the slackchain. I used to wonder if "Bitch's Brew," was his internal dialog. Amazing
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Shack
Social climber
So. Cal.
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Yeah, Dingus...
Before they lower the basket, they lower down the keypad
so you can enter your pin number.
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Ouch!
climber
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Topic Author's Reply - Sep 7, 2005 - 08:25pm PT
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LOL! You guys seem to know a lot about conducting porn transactions. Does it help to be sober at the time?
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Crimpergirl
Sport climber
St. Louis
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Crimpergirl likes Rokjox. More stories please!!!
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WBraun
climber
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Sh-it Rokjox there's very few people around who've seen that ugly piece of sh-it car. Bought it of the Superintendents wife for $25.00 back then. Some drunk prick came out from the Mt Room bar one night and smashed the front and rear windshields. I had to borrow Birdwell’s car to go to the junk yard and buy front and rear windshields.
We had to get a running start some times to get up steep grades. Some times guys would have to push that thing just to get enough speed going and then jump in.
Ha ha ha what a piece of crap that was. I was going down I-80 once and the front windshield had a hole the size of a basket ball on the drivers side during a snow storm wearing my ski goggles. CHP pulls me over and gives me the WTF look. I tell him the loader dropped his bucket through there during one big storm. He goes “OK, are ya going to get it fixed” I reply “Of coarse” and give him the look “do I look like an idiot.”
Of coarse he buys the story lock stock and whatever that goes with that phrase. But gives me a fix it ticket. You get, I forget how many days to fix the violation before they slap you with a fine if you don’t. Now all ya got to do with those back then is make up some officers name and badge number and where ever that thing goes they always clear it.
Worked every time …..
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Hardman Knott
Gym climber
Straight Outta Squamton
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Thanks you guys –– this is some of the best stuff I've read anywhere!
You guys both captured the moment really well. !@#$%^& awesome! Still LMAO...
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Ouch!
climber
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Topic Author's Reply - Sep 8, 2005 - 05:26pm PT
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BUSTED
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Russ Walling
Social climber
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Werner looks the same now as he did back in '81 or so.... kinda like a tall non-Asian Bruce Lee that needs a sandwich.
He has skills too.... while boxing in the old Rescue Site he has knocked some of the ruling Valleys Kings of the era onto their ass.
He can also balance all kinds of objects on his nose. True... seen knives, lawn chairs, bike wheels.. I have a pic here somewhere.....
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Russ Walling
Social climber
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Found it... this is a real one too, not some bad PS fake. Sig is real too... had him sign it personally. 1984??
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Ouch!
climber
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Topic Author's Reply - Sep 8, 2005 - 06:15pm PT
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Talk about your wild man! That hurts to look at.
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burp
Trad climber
Salt Lake City
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Howdy,
I love the photo of WBraun on the back of the '87(?) Sole Survivor calendar. He's plugged in solo on something in the valley with a ghetto-blaster purched on his shoulder. Can't remember whether the plug is sticking is his mouth or not and can't remember which route ... need to go dig the calendar out.
Someone have this to scan for supertaco? I don't have a scanner.
Enjoy!
burp
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Hardman Knott
Gym climber
Straight Outta Squamton
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Now we know for sure that Rockjox wasn't BS-ing.
Werner really was a !@#$%^& wildman!
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arete
Trad climber
Estes Park, Colorado
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Back in the 70's it had long been a park rule to not feed the animals. However plenty of tourists still did it on a regular basis and there were always even more racoons, squirrels, blackbirds and pterydactyls than climbers in front of the deli, begging for handouts.
Werner used to sit on a bench and hold his hand out to scavenging racoons and when they approached, expecting a tidbit, he would haul off and slap them! (not hard you understand -- he wasn't trying to hurt them and didn't, just discouraged them). It did have a tendancy to appall and outrage the tourists though.
Never saw him slap a bear but wouldn't be surprised.
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Ouch!
climber
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Topic Author's Reply - Sep 8, 2005 - 07:51pm PT
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kevin Fosburg
Sport climber
park city,ut
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The crazy thing is Werner really can balance things on his nose. I'm pretty sure I remember him sending a bicycle first or second try.
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Watusi
Social climber
Joshua Tree, CA
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He certainly is the Real McCoy!! Beyond reproach!!
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Jaybro
Social climber
The West
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Either Cosgrove or Walt had the definitlve knife on Nose while on slackchain photo, in their van.
so that's where the squirrel thing started, alas, that patting lead to punting.
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arete
Trad climber
Estes Park, Colorado
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Another thing I saw Werner do a couple of times at the deli....
He would be walking away from the deli eating a banana, and then casually toss the peel over his shoulder onto the ground.
After a minute or so, he would come back, pick it up and toss it in the trash can. Always great watching peoples reactions though. They were probably just as appalled at us for LOL as they were at Werner.
"alas, that patting lead to punting"
I don't think Werner started the fine sport of squirrel and raccoon punting. We sometimes went for the extra point in C4 when things were getting out of hand. Having a raccoon chewing a hole in your tent in the middle of the night (even when there is no food in it) gets to be a pain. Yager used to have this giant family style camping tent that could sleep a family of 20 refugees. One winter, every night when we stumbled home from the MR bar, we would have to chase 30 raccoons out of it.
edit: OK, so 30 is a bit of an exageration -- it was a bunch though. Mom, dad and a slew of kids. We should have called Werner over to teach 'em a lesson.
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Largo
Sport climber
Venice, Ca
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In the old days, whenever I'd get stressed, I'd go hang with Warner in his Van. We never said much, but I always left his presence with a change in perspctive, and was good to go from there.
JL
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stoneloan
Trad climber
Temecula, CA
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werner doesn't know me but when i was trying to top out on the nose in july of '99 (my first time up), the sar was hauling up mary braun who was bringing up an injured euro who jumped from the boot and slammed into the dihedral. anyways, sar let us top out and offered to fly our bags down if we'd help haul mary up on a 1 to 1. i was beat up but proud to be on top and happy to be helping sar. over comes werner and he says, "your climb doesn't count because you're not taking your own haul-bag down". i guess i looked crushed because he started laughing and said he was only kidding.
bob
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Crimpergirl
Sport climber
St. Louis
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I feel like I'm hallucinating with this thread. Mac! What happened to you? And me - ack!!!
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WBraun
climber
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As you may know Crimpergirl, it's about 99.99% bullsh-it.
It's the point zero one percent thats cha gota worry about.
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can't say
Social climber
Pasadena CA
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Sep 10, 2005 - 12:28am PT
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So Werner, what's the true story behind the pic that made it into Yosemite Climber? The one of you with massive racks around your shoulders, looking slighly peeved. Is it true that photo was taken on an early attempt of the PO and you had just jugged the fixed lines with those racks weighing you down.
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WBraun
climber
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Sep 10, 2005 - 12:08pm PT
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That's the true story.
But I wasn't peeved. I just got to the ledge and was straining to stabilize myself on the uneven surface I was standing, when I forget who had the camera says, “Let me take a shot here”.
Click! And immortalized into the emulsion of chemicals and paper an image in time. :-)
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Peter Haan
Trad climber
San Francisco, CA
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This one old thread!
Werner, the Fourth Manifestation:
Werner, Huichol Warrior--- Fish's favorite:
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