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Karl Baba
Trad climber
Yosemite, Ca
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Topic Author's Original Post - Jun 30, 2009 - 09:55pm PT
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On June 28th, 2009, the Family, co-workers, and a few friends of Brutus of Wyde gathered in Marin County to honor his life. A climber gathering is planned in the mountains for later in the Summer. Stay tuned...
I was the minister for the ceremony and a number of people spoke. What I'd like to do here is post a special thanks from Brutus's wife Em (Nurse Rachet), followed by the text for the memorial, and then the final remarkable pages of his climbing journal, concluded about 1993, which foreshadowed his views regarding the event of his passing. We encourage folks to post their long and short Brutus stories here so we can collect his Wylde-Life stories for posterity.
Much Love and Respect for all who read this
Karlee Baba
+++++++++++++++++++++
Message from Em
Namaste and infinite thanks to all of you
who've shared memories & photos online or in person
You've given comfort beyond words.
You've shown Bruce's family & co-workers
the deep richness of experience, beauty &
connection in the climbing community.
namaste beautiful warrior
+++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++
We gather today to honor and celebrate the spirit of Bruce Bindner aka “Brutus of Wyde” and to “Be there” for each other in the task of moving forward without his physical presence. I invite you to be yourself. Trust that it’s OK to Cry, Laugh or remain silent. Some of us have chosen not to speak at this time but are holding space of the Heart with us here.
Brutus was an extraordinary man with Extraordinary friends and You are among his friends. I honor you as Bruce would have honored you.
Brutus knew me as “Karlee” or “Baba.” I’m one of his friends from the climbing world. I’m deeply honored that Em asked me here for this memorial.
I’m going to speak for a few minutes followed by a personal silence where we can hold space for each other and commune with Bruce. Then, we have a video to remember his many faces. A few people have been chosen to speak and then anyone moved to speak may share. Volumes could be written about his exploits, so if time runs short, we can continue regaling each other with Brucisms at the Picnic which follows at Muir Beach after the service. I really encourage people to write down notable tales of Bruce and email them to Em so we can make a collection that will hardly need exaggeration.
Bruce engaged in a lot of pastimes that many of us think of as dangerous…Rockclimbing, backcountry skiing, and mountaineering. When his city friends asked about the hazards of his activities, Bruce would usually say the most dangerous thing he did was drive to and from the mountains.
And that’s how Bruce left us. He drove off a steep section of road on his way to meet a friend to climb Castle Rock Spire. There were no witnesses and no one else was hurt. Bruce died of a spinal cord injury and thankfully, there is no evidence that he suffered.
I don’t want to dwell on the way Brutus died. It can’t be reversed or second guessed. How he lived was much more important. I’m afraid that many of us feel cheated by losing Bruce. It’s easy to feel that it’s unfair that such a great friend has been taken from us. I believe Brutus would have none of that. He took responsibility for what he did and, with a big heart like the open sky, would not wish anyone to suffer bitterness over his sudden passing. In fact, miraculously, Bruce has left us a guide for his passing, but I’m saving that for last.
Brutus was an inspiration to me and I want to be as faithful in honoring him.
Bruce was a unique mix of reverence and irreverence. He could spend a precious day off cleaning up trash in the beautiful mountains he held sacred. Somebody said that he was the kind of guy who would give you the shirt off his back and then offer you his trousers. That was no exaggeration. Another remarked that we are left with the question “What would Brutus do?”
And yet, he would not be found observing traditional religious rites nor repeating any dogma. He embodied his ideals rather than preaching them. He “was” the change that he might have advocated. And he loved a good joke or a bit of wildness. His good humor might embarrass now and then, but was not cruel nor at anyone’s expense. I performed Brutus and Em’s wedding in a alpine mountain meadow. Instead of exchanging rings at his wedding, he and Em exchanged items of climbing gear called “Nut tools.”
I’m afraid I owe him an apology for not pulling off anything irreverent and funny at his memorial. My feeling is that he would have wanted that, but in the end would have cared too much about people’s raw feelings. I thought about showing up in one of those paper birthday hats as if I were confused about the occasion I was invited for, but I just can’t bring myself. For those of you who know that irreverent side of Bruce, just imagine that we planted a whoopee cushion under your chair. You just need to understand that Brutus would hope that you to return to laughter as soon as you’re ready.
You almost had to underestimate Bruce at first since he was so humble and it was unreasonable to expect anyone to have so many talents.
I would have only been a little surprised if He had started flapping his arms and actually start lifting off the floor, then smile at me and say "what's the matter, never seen anybody fly before? I'm not really very good at it"
He was a bit like the bonsai trees that grace this hall, with a strong and resilient character compressed and distilled in an inimitable form.
I have to think he wouldn’t want us squirming in our chairs waiting for any formal rituals and prayers. Let’s make a point to remember Bruce in a private moment outside in beauty. Sometime when one of nature’s special gifts touches our soul. That way our grief may be uplifted with the quality of wonder and love that dispels the darkness, and embraces the glory of life. Brutus was a master of seizing the day.
Bruce was always honoring "the gifts" that the poetry of life serendipitously brings us. Even on my way to this memorial from Yosemite, somebody in the next lane suddenly paid my bridge toll for me. That’s something Brutus would do and I saw it as “My gift for the day”
Brutus left us many, many gifts and they didn’t end when he moved onwards. It turns out over 16 ago Bruce wrote and sketched in a climbing journal. It ends with a beautiful drawing of Castle Rock Spire, which was where he was driving that fateful day. On those very last pages of his journal he transcribed two poems that he certainly meant to be the heart of his memorial. He knew he would leave us someday and left guidance for his passing.
I read them here in the order he wrote them.
Do not stand at my grave and weep;
I am not there. I do not sleep.
I am a thousand winds that blow.
I am the diamond glints on snow.
I am the sunlight on ripened grain.
I am the gentle autumn rain.
When you awaken in the morning's hush
I am the swift uplifting rush
Of quiet birds in circled flight.
I am the soft stars that shine at night.
Do not stand at my grave and cry;
I am not there. I did not die.
That was by Mary Frye
And this one
Remember, by Christina Georgina Rossetti
Remember me when I am gone away,
Gone far away into the silent land;
When you can no more hold me by the hand,
Nor I half turn to go, yet turning… stay.
Remember me, when no more day by day
You tell me of our future that you plann'd:
Only remember me; you understand
It will be late to counsel then, or pray.
Yet if you should forget me for a while
And afterwards remember, do not grieve:
For if the darkness and corruption leave
A vestige of the thoughts that once I had,
Better by far you should forget and smile
Than that you should remember and be sad.
“So.. How to be faithful to his Spirit at this memorial?” is a question I’ve had to ask myself. “What would Brutus do?” If he were physically present I’m sure he would be bending over backwards to make food for the picnic, to help set-up, and to be a friend. He would honor our love and respect for him but not wish us to suffer in grief and pain. Can we wish him well on his new greatest journey of all, honor his incredible example and love, all while missing him? All while confused about why he left our world so soon?
The passing of Bruce Bindner passes the torch to all of us to find pleasure and fulfillment in serving our friends and community while living large and from the heart. The leader of the band has moved on and it’s our show now. The training wheels have been taken off. I wish Bruce all the wonder that his new journey offers and I wish you all big giant lives, full to the brim with the gifts that life offers.
One of Bruce’s favorite phrases was “Blessed are those who live out their dreams.’ May it be so.
We have prayer flags to share with you. Tibetans hang them to bring the sacred to their world and let the winds carry their prayers into the heavens.
Lets take a few moments, starting and ending with the bell, to remember Brutus. Feel what it was like to be with him and let’s commune with that memory.
++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++
Brutus of Wyde was a true inspiration as a climber and as a human. As a tribute to him I suggest we all make a point of figuring out some ingenius way to really stoke someone out, or teach them something cool, and go out and do it. Hike some cold beverages out to the top of El Cap, Fix a great meal for some bros at camp, or clean up a mess that's not yours.
WIth Respect and Love
Karlee Baba
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donini
Trad climber
Ouray, Colorado
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Jun 30, 2009 - 10:01pm PT
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Karl,
Simply... a wonderful tribute. I never met him, I wish I had, he was well loved.
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steelmnkey
climber
Vision man...ya gotta have vision...
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Jun 30, 2009 - 10:11pm PT
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Thanks for posting that Karl.
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F10
Trad climber
e350
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Jun 30, 2009 - 10:20pm PT
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Wow, speechless
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Studly
Trad climber
WA
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Jun 30, 2009 - 10:27pm PT
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Very powerful and moving. Brutus of Wyde is off on another journey.
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Doug Robinson
Trad climber
Santa Cruz
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Jun 30, 2009 - 11:04pm PT
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Thank you Karl.
I didn't know Bruce.
DMT's writing opened my eyes.
Your tribute here is full of feeling, dimension
and unexpected turns,
as opening as a free passage over the bridge.
His list of climbs was pretty astonishing.
One in particular, Planaria on Temple Crag,
I have lived beneath in fear and respect,
after my friends Gordon and Jay came home wide-eyed from the FA,
telling the tale of launching 30' out of the crux.
We left it alone, the locals,
even us wide-loving locals.
You walked right up and climbed it.
So masterfully I didn't even know
until after you were gone.
Your journals say it clearly,
cracking open the person behind the climber
By the lines you drew
and the words you set down with them.
Sail on Brutus,
We'll live larger in your wake.
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Captain...or Skully
Social climber
way, WAY out there....(OMG)
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Jun 30, 2009 - 11:22pm PT
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Aye, well said(typed)....Words are weak & insufficient in the presence of grace, but you folks are much more eloquent than I. Fare ye well, Bruce.
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noshoesnoshirt
climber
I don't even know any more
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Jun 30, 2009 - 11:33pm PT
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Wow, thanks Karl
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bluering
Trad climber
Santa Clara, Ca.
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Jun 30, 2009 - 11:35pm PT
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Pretty cool, Karl. Your a good dude!
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nature
climber
Tucson, AZ
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Jun 30, 2009 - 11:39pm PT
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wow... thank you.
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Mungeclimber
Trad climber
sorry, just posting out loud.
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Jun 30, 2009 - 11:46pm PT
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Karl,
I'm glad you were able to post those. I had not seen much of Bruce's artwork, other than topos.
You'll note the text in the topo...
"Now the Sirens have a still more fatal weapon than their song, namely their silence...
someone might possibly have escaped from their singing; but from their silence certainly never."
-Franz Kafka, Parables
Insightful - that the absence of a thing draws us nearer a thing.
Lets go climbing!
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couchmaster
climber
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Karl, for all of us left behind your true words are as fine of a gift as ever received. I hope that those who knew and loved Bruce can find comfort in them.
Thank you so much.
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bobinc
Trad climber
Portland, Or
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Karl-- I figured you might be the one to run the show at this event. I am sorry I did not ever meet Bruce (even more sorry now) but glad that you lent your special talent and your love to the gathering. Thank you for sharing those pages from his journal, too.
Bob Davis
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Ed Hartouni
Trad climber
Livermore, CA
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thanks Karl, other events in life intervened to prevent me from attending
Bruce was deep, and I wished I had had time to know more of him. It was a gift to have met him and to have known him at all. And this is all too somber for him... I suspect.
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Mungeclimber
Trad climber
sorry, just posting out loud.
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f*#king stellar formation there Chief!
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T2
climber
Cardiff by the sea
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That was excellent Karl.
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apogee
climber
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Truly wonderful, Karl. Thank you.
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Greg Barnes
climber
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Thanks so much for posting this Karl!
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Mungeclimber
Trad climber
sorry, just posting out loud.
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Brutus giving advice...
"do not, I repeat, DO NOT listen to Rokjox regarding the Absinthe.
The last chemical you want in your system when breaking up, or just after breaking up with someone, is absinthe.
As everyone knows, "Absinthe makes the heart grow fonder."
Hope this helps.
Brutus"
LOL!!!!!
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L
climber
Just takin' the long way home...
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Thank you, Karl, for sharing this wonderful post with us.
I'm just another one of the many who didn't know Brutus of Wyde in the flesh...but simply through the heart.
Namaste, Em.
Namaste, Karl.
Laura
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Reilly
Mountain climber
Monrovia, CA
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Namaste...inspiring.
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Ghost
climber
A long way from where I started
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Thank you Karl.
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hooblie
climber
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i believe a considered life might be the highest mark we'll leave
"The passing of Bruce Bindner passes the torch to all of us to find pleasure and fulfillment in serving our friends and community while living large and from the heart. The leader of the band has moved on and it’s our show now. The training wheels have been taken off. I wish Bruce all the wonder that his new journey offers and I wish you all big giant lives, full to the brim with the gifts that life offers."
karlee, i'm so impressed with the way you rose to the occasion,
and under difficult circumstances led us in your just right way.
the easy stuff is, well easy. but we call upon the exceptional in our time of need.
i don't know exactly who these tears are for, whether they are for em, or us or for the human condition but i am torn up and tossed about trying to grasp the circle of life and they way it turns out to be.
the dreadful glory of love in the setting of love lost
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klk
Trad climber
cali
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thanks for posting.
and especially for the scans.
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nita
climber
chica from chico, I don't claim to be a daisy
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Beautiful..Thank you Baba Karl..
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mtdoc
Trad climber
Port Angles,WA
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Thanks for posting this Karlee Baba and thanks for your excellent presence on Sunday.
It was a wonderful ceremony, with such a wide circle of friends a testament to Bruce's depth.
His spirit lives on in so many people.
It was a bittersweet day for me - saying goodbye to Brutus but also reconnecting with some old friends.
Wish I'd had more of a chance to visit with you, Dingus and other of his many friends. Perhaps at a future time.
Joe
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mooch
Big Wall climber
The Immaculate Conception
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Hike some cold beverages out to the top of El Cap
Thus begins the Brutus Brew-Toss! I'm heading up there sometime in late August to represent the good vibes....Sapporo's for sure.
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Nohea
Trad climber
Aiea,Hi
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A great post Karl, Thank you for sharing, along with Munge and DMT, Thanks guys.
Most of all, Thank you Brutus for living a life that would cause us to ask WWBD?
Aloha,
wil
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survival
Big Wall climber
A Token of My Extreme
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Awesome.
Thank you for sharing that beautiful stuff.
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Jaybro
Social climber
Wolf City, Wyoming
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An extended comment from one of those EBMUD coworkers; "he made it fun to come to work, I won't even tell you the stuff he did in the elevators... But my favorite was when he would pull off some mischeif and a guest, or someone from another department would ask, "Who is that?"
That, I would answer, is the person whose responsibility it is to make sure Contra Costa Water is safe to drink."
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guido
Trad climber
Santa Cruz/New Zealand/South Pacific
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Thank you Karl, what a memorable service you have performed.
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halfhitch
Trad climber
Steamboat Springs, CO
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Thanks Karl for celebrating Bruce's life with those near, dear and afar. Peace, Wil
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Mungeclimber
Trad climber
sorry, just posting out loud.
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Jay!
Holy Hand Grenades!
He flys up that thing with the inverted upside down technique.
I think I can now say I have seen everything.
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Fletcher
Trad climber
the end of the world as we know it, & I feel fine.
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Wow! Karl... you are one extraordinary and beautiful human being... who could better lead Brutus' life celebration, distilling and communicating the spirit of one extraordinary and beautiful man? I cannot think of anyone.
That journal... it's drawings and writings... what a gift to us all!
In gratitude, namaste.
Eric
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mooch
Big Wall climber
The Immaculate Conception
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I thought you were Peter Croft when I first saw you.
Gee, Ding......do I look that haggard? teehee
BTW, you planning on the Hoffman gig? Would be great if you colud. I think Pat and Lori decided to make it. Will reconfirm.
"One climb, one pitch, one move at a time...."
~ Brutus Of Wyde
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Steve Grossman
Trad climber
Seattle, WA
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Awesome thread Karl! What an amazing and talented man...and dangerous dreamer! Thanks for sharing the memorial service with us and providing a clear glimpse into his life so tragically ended but so well lived as to rise above it. My heart goes out to his family, loved ones and new bride, Em.
Hard to make any sense of this big loss...
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pk_davidson
Trad climber
Albuquerque, NM
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Sigh...
Wonderful drawings, thought provoking quoting, a stunning loss in a meaningless way.
I doubt we can ever make sense of such a loss, but we can make sense of the direction in which his life points us.
Thanks for sharing, Sr. Baba and condolences to all those touched by this passing.
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Hendo1
Mountain climber
Toronto
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That was a beautiful memorial, Karl.
I checked into rec.climbing for the first time in years and saw your post. I still can't believe it. Brutus was a great guy and will be missed.
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rcknsno
climber
California
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Thank you Karl and everyone else that spoke at the memorial. Bruce inspired us all, and figuring out a special tribute to him will be an honor.
Namaste
Karin
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Mungeclimber
Trad climber
sorry, just posting out loud.
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Talked to Pat on the phone briefly yesterday...
he tried to get me to go the Rockies today!!! LOL!!! talk about infectious Brutus spirit! wonderful!
he wasn't sure, but sounded like he was checking out the Haufbrau possibilities.
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mooch
Big Wall climber
The Immaculate Conception
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Munge and Em had pretty clear dates earlier this year. Not sure if that's changed. Originally, it was the 16th of Sept to the 20th. Mrs. Mooch is really looking forward to this trip since she'll be celebrating her birthday with the Woodchuck Clucks. Think I got Pat and Lori hooked on coming.
Dingus.....if you need a ride, I'll come get you!!!!!
Chief, you in??
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Mungeclimber
Trad climber
sorry, just posting out loud.
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there are a couple others that expressed sincere interest.
probably would be inappropriate to have everyone from hells half acre out there, but lets get an email thread going and square up the dates and how much tequila will be needed.
still looking for a True Lime supplier.
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mooch
Big Wall climber
The Immaculate Conception
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Absolutely Munge. Couldn't agree more!
I'll call you after the weekend Rick and bring you up to speed.....unless Munge or Dingus does before I get back.
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Karl Baba
Trad climber
Yosemite, Ca
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Topic Author's Reply - Jul 5, 2009 - 07:48pm PT
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I posted this on a new thread here
http://www.supertopo.com/climbing/thread.html?topic_id=895839
Best to post your answers there
but wanted to put a copy here for posterity
++++++++
Brutus of Wyde is playing hookey from the old climber's home, and a few of us have been kicking around special ways to honor him by "Paying it forward" Brutus style.
See Brutus would often spend a day cleaning up at the base of a crag, or would carry somebody's favorite food or beverage in his pack on a long route to surprise him with on the summit. He was masterful in random acts of kindness.
To honor his memory, and to enhance our own bliss and fulfillment, I thought we might kick around some ideas about what we could do when we wanted to take some time playing "What would Brutus do?"
One of the first ideas was to show up on top of some crag (or El Cap) on a hot day when people are topping out. Bring a variety of nice foods and cold drinks and share them with the parched and battered folks on the summit.
When I was on my way to give Brutus's eulogy, somebody in the next lane paid my bridge toll, that was a good one. (A Brutus quickie)
I thought it would be cool to run around on a crazy snowy day in the mountains in winter with your 4x4 with a stack of flares, charged cell phone, comealong, and thermos of hot chocolate, and just help out tourists who managed to get stuck in the snow or slide off the road.
Basically, what are some creative ways to stoke somebody else out who might not have been expecting anything? Bonus points for something that provides maximum bliss and at minimum expense.
Peace and love
Karlee
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Double D
climber
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What amazing pencil drawings. Regretfully I never had the pleasure of meeting Bruce. My loss.
It sounds like he had an incredible zest for life. I'm truely sorry for all that lost a friend.
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14re3
Boulder climber
Twin Peaks ,CA
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Karl,
I did not get to talk with you, there, at the memorial. Thank you for your mc /speaking/and now posting. I do not want EM to drift out of our lives.
Tomorrow EleB our 20year old is doing her first climb with "rim of the world climbing club" Ken Kenega who lives one house & several trees down from us will help her. Brutus was her Uncle & we never met Ken until the memorial. He climbed with Pat & Brutus for 30 some years. He has lived there for 20 years & we met as neighbors at the memorial! How many degress of seperation? whew!
Please post details for august/september as far in advance as possible so we can attend. All 3 of my girl/adult/children & I (his brother), want to be there as I am sure E.D. will go too. (his daughter)
...............................................Jur_el of Brutus
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426
Sport climber
Buzzard Point, TN
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Jul 20, 2009 - 02:07pm PT
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Whoa great stuff, inspiring, rest in peace BoW
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14re3
Boulder climber
Twin Peaks ,CA
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went with daughter # 2 & Pat & ken Sunday. There is talk of June lake next weekend 7-9 & she wants to go to that!
I am Working. Jurel of Brutus.
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Mungeclimber
Trad climber
sorry, just posting out loud.
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got the call from Pat, may head over this weekend. Reminds me I gotta call him back, thx!
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