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can't say

Social climber
Pasadena CA
Nov 1, 2005 - 11:43am PT
Jeff, ain't that the truth. Sort of like what Psycho Kenny got into.

Granny, is that you???
WBraun

climber
Nov 1, 2005 - 11:52am PT
Can't say

I remember that incident all to well, that guy actually jugged their lines and was stealinging their gear. That Luke guy was casing my van once in the Toulmne SAR site also, looking in my windows. We ran him out of there. One day the rangers came around and asked if we have seen him and to be on the lookout for the worm. They caught him somewhere down by bakersfield I heard with his grandmother in the trunk on his way to the Valley to dispose of the body? There had been an all state APB out for him.
Russ Walling

Social climber
THIS SPACE FOR RENT
Nov 1, 2005 - 12:58pm PT
It is all muddy in my brain, but to the best of my knowledge:

Luke the Fluke, Granny in trunk, aka Luke Skywalker, line jugger, gear thief. All true.

Ken the psycho, psycho, got killed on the Peanut in Eldo when his rope cut at his waist. Cops were in the parking area looking for him in Eldo as he was wanted for killing a guy in the Buttermilk while bouldering. Shallow grave.

Bullwinkle caught a thief in camp 4.... can't remember the guys name, but he got thumped and litterally dragged through the mud all the way to the cops.

Fight at the base of the Zodiac... Yo hammer used on a guys back. They ended up throwing rocks at Ken the Psycho to keep him back. The guy who got hit with the hammer I can't remember his name, but it starts with an F?? Finnegan? Flarety? Fogerty? Anyway, it was all over fixed lines and gear at the top of the lines and bailing partners.

How does any of this tie into me?

Well..... Luke the Fluke lived out by us sheep buggerers with his Granny, and we have given him rides to and from the crags before. Mistake I tell you. I also went with Dick Cilley and Luke to do an FA in Josh (Cilleys masterpiece The Living Conjunction) and Luke was to bring the gear. He had it all sewn into his sport coat..... we did not have nearly enough. All my rack was in camp, hidden.... Luke goes back early to get more gear. When we all get back, all my rack is gone.... all of it. I think Sewellymon had a climbing class with Luke in it and Karl with a K!!! unreal!!!! Anyway, I get a call from the cops in Yosemite... seems that Luke had a ton of gear and I quote "wanted to be the best climber in the world..." In the stash was my entire rack. Got it back!!!! Mark your gear peoples!!!

Next nutcase: Ken the Psycho is hangin out at JT, as we all were.... He has already told a few people that he will kill them if they touch his car..... we might have been a bit tipsy, but we used to pee on the fender and sit on his car to get rise out of him. Anyway... all my rack goes missing again from camp. Weeks pass and I see Psycho Kenny climbing with one of my biners on his rack. Keen eye here boys.... so I confront him... he says some BS about how he found it etc... no way.... so I go back to his camp when he finishes climbing with a biner chain as a weapon..... he freaks and hops in his car and blow outta there for town... the cops are doing the loop so I send JT's finest to chase him down. They nab his ass and he sings like a canary... some guy he is staying with in town has a mountain of gear in his livingroom... all stolen from JT. I get all my rack back. After this is when he allegedly killed some dude in the Buttermilk.

Moral: always mark your gear and always file a report with the Tool-deJour™™™™ I've got two full racks returned to me. this way
loads

Trad climber
Phoenix AZ.
Nov 1, 2005 - 02:08pm PT
This one's a little strange...
At J.T. 15 years ago or so I was talking with my friend DE ...I had just finished climbing for the day and was sorting gear when he anounced to me that some of my stuff looked a little familiar.
Knowing I would never steal from him asked me where said stuff came from...I told him I had seen an add for a gear sale on a message board at my local REI in Orange County and bought it from a guy in Costa Mesa Ca.....Well I guess I inadvertently busted this guy because DE and Todd being very suspicious also answered the add and busted this guy with tons of stolen gear.
Seems as though he had broken into Todds house in JT and had gear and books along with stuff that belonged to DE....
DE just recently informed me it was known as the Famous Louie Case.....Glad I could help guys........
the Fet

Trad climber
Loomis, CA
Nov 1, 2005 - 02:40pm PT
Aaron, not the new Tacoma? Time to look for a new one that's not black I suppose.

I always wanted to set my car up with the "mission impossible" setup. Someone breaks in and a cloud of gas is released, then the tape deck starts and states "you have been contaminated with a deadly nerve gas, your insides will turn to mush and you will die a painful, horrifying death unless you turn yourself into the police and have them contact me for the antidote" Of course the gas would be inert, but it would be fun to make them crap their pants.

My dad said they used to solder razor blades to the back of their radios so if someone tried to pull it out they'd leave their fingertips on the floorboard and look like the guy in Road Warrior who tried to catch the razor boomerang.
Toker Villain

Big Wall climber
Toquerville, Utah
Nov 1, 2005 - 04:27pm PT
Mind you this is just a rumor I heard over a campfire from an aquaintance of a friend's partner,but....



It seems that there had been a series of brazen gear thefts that also seemed to happen just before a rise in both lifestyle and climbing ambitions in a certain shady dirtbag who had suddenly moved from rehearsed sport climbs to unrehearsed fiascos on moderate trad routes.

Said fiascos were also occasioned by copious gear abandonment some of which looked very familiar to another climber upon bootyment.

Long story greatly shortened;

Our dirtbag made his final appearance in the climbing world in Accidents in North American Mountaineering.

Gear failure? Possible rockfall. Inconclusive yada yada.

Using someone else's gear is always bad. Geez you never know WHAT they've done with it.
Toker Villain

Big Wall climber
Toquerville, Utah
Nov 1, 2005 - 04:28pm PT
By the way Russ, I already have the TM on "bootyment".
Russ Walling

Social climber
THIS SPACE FOR RENT
Nov 1, 2005 - 04:50pm PT
I still get Tool-duJour™™™™ though, right??
Toker Villain

Big Wall climber
Toquerville, Utah
Nov 1, 2005 - 05:03pm PT
You bet, plus we're sharing several like, "Milking the nOObs".
Gary

climber
Desolation Basin, Calif.
Nov 1, 2005 - 05:43pm PT
Piton Ron,
I don't think your story is anything to be proud of. Last I checked thievery is not a capital offense. Don't forget, fattrad and Jody read these postings.
Toker Villain

Big Wall climber
Toquerville, Utah
Nov 1, 2005 - 06:58pm PT
Gary I don't think your mockery of Socrates is anything to be proud of but that is something that you ACTUALLY DID.



Why should I be proud of hearing a rumor?
Jaybro

Social climber
The West
Topic Author's Reply - Nov 1, 2005 - 07:39pm PT
Ak-the grade going up to the Mono lake overlook (ontop of which KTHX™ returns)? Man!

Camnot-i'm pictu-ing a trailer with a dead human logo and oversize jumper cables reaching out to the tow car.

LEB how embarassing would it be to hear a recording of all we, say, sing, exclaim or admonish when we're in our car alone?

WBraun

climber
Nov 1, 2005 - 08:31pm PT
I agree LEB I love driving especially long distances, you can think forever in the car while driving.

Then when I get to Los Angeles I like to think about all the different ways to torture the guy that just cut me off. :-)
426

Sport climber
Screamersville, VA
Nov 2, 2005 - 10:18am PT
During the rash of incidents in which a car thief was jackin by kiping the keys out of climber's packs ...(this still happenin?)

My friend Big Lar was soloing TT, he was on the ledge on P1, noodlin the anchor. He leaned back to see the pirate rifle through his pack. Lar yells at the guy, who glances up and starts runnin' down the talus.


Big Lar starts hooking up his rap device and screams, "I'll be down there BEFORE YOU!"


The guy, without breaking stride, tosses Lar's keys into the talus. It took Lar like 3 hours to find his keys...


Fish: "Tool-Du-Jour™"- that's a keeper.
Hardman Knott

Gym climber
Straight Outta Squamton
Nov 2, 2005 - 10:30am PT
Werner –– if you don't mind my asking...

Why in God's name are you going to LA?
WBraun

climber
Nov 2, 2005 - 10:53am PT
Hardman

Merry's mom lives in LA
Shack

Big Wall climber
So. Cal.
Nov 2, 2005 - 11:46am PT
"Then when I get to Los Angeles I like to think about all the different ways to torture the guy that just cut me off. :-)"

If you can't think of anything Werner, I've got lots of ideas,
and thinking of new ones everyday.
Hardman Knott

Gym climber
Straight Outta Squamton
Nov 2, 2005 - 11:54am PT
OK Werner –– you had me worried there for a sec.
Leroy

climber
Nov 9, 2005 - 02:56pm PT
Kenny was a psycho but Luke was in another League.Fish and I used to scratch Kennys prize Vdub with the rivets of our Levis while looking him in the eye.Kenny wouldnt even think of saying anything.But if u looked in Lukes eyes ,u knew he´d kill u.Still I funked with him some.I´ve seen him since the Granny incident.So I cant help but wonder if its true.I kept walkin though he saluted me by name.Any sitings?
Russ Walling

Social climber
NOT FOR LOAN™ CC3
Nov 9, 2005 - 03:05pm PT
True stories from the Leroy. No sitings of Luke. Maybe he is out or escaped? Cured? hmmmm... Bet he would kill ya though....
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