A Dog's Life

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Tobia

Social climber

Denial

Feb 24, 2015 - 01:29pm PT

Blaster. Blaster belonged to my late nephew, Anthony. Blaster was everything to Anthony and Anthony was everything to Blaster. Anthony adopted her from PAWS. We all know how much a dog appreciates the love of those who adopt them.

Anthony like me, needed something to love and something to comfort him. Comfort that only a dog can provide. The total dedication and unquestionable love that a dog provides is like no other love. The sensitivity to their master's emotional needs is unmeasurable. They seem to sense emotional distress that people can't.

I will be bringing Blaster home in a couple of weeks, after my brother and his wife are ready to let him move to his new home. Blaster is their last link to Anthony, who at 29, lost his life in a motorcycle accident recently in Las Vegas.

I come to this thread and read the sad tales and woes people suffer when they lose a pet to age, disease or accidents. I read the celebration of a dog's life and their master's pride in the animal. I am not sure if anyone has breached this aspect of a "dog's life"; if so, pardon me as I express my interpretation of Blaster's woes.

I went to Anthony's memorial this past weekend in FL. I spent most of my time with Blaster because I felt her pain. For 3 days she did nothing but look for Anthony. I took her for walks; but unlike those of previous years, she was not looking for squirrels, mice, sea gulls or other game; but for Anthony.

I think this is the first time I have witnessed a dog's distress at the loss of their master. Perhaps I have in the past; but it did not hit home as it did with Blaster.

I could not comfort Blaster, other than giving into her constant desire to search for Anthony or to love on her until she fell asleep in her bed; which was lined with Anthony's bedspread. If I budged in the night; which I do quite a lot, Blaster would wake and the grieving would start all over again and finally subside as she dozed off.

I wanted to communicate to her Anthony's whereabouts; but could find no way to do so other than giving her my undivided attention and talk to her as if she understood my every word.

Sunday when leaving I cried like a baby, for my brother, his wife, Anthony's two sisters and Blaster.

I hope that my home, my love and my own dogs can someway help Blaster adapt to a "new" dog's life.

↓Anthony & Blaster, April 2014.

Chiloe

Trad climber

Lee, NH

Topic Author's Reply - Feb 24, 2015 - 01:37pm PT

Thanks for posting that and for adopting Blaster, Tobia. That's a moving story. And you're right, we've mostly seen grief from the other side on this thread.

Gnome Ofthe Diabase

climber

Out Of Bed

Feb 24, 2015 - 01:43pm PT

Tobia, Ho my you have found the Gnome, let me help, regardless of what you think of me, you are a hero now in my families eyes and all that you have said about Blaster is hart felt here!
The love that you see oozing from dogs is heaven sent! I think that I am right ? You are reverent? If so well this will be easier if not you should try it!

Pray with Blaster, make a big deal of it pull out all the stops include her, make sure that she is watching! Set candles but do not light them. Find one big picture of Anthony and one of him and the bike. Some of his other humans too collect her around you and just her and you! That is important, shower her with love if you can cry and hold her tell her that Anthony has died!
Dogs do understand and read emotions perfectly.

Now the hard part for you and her take a part of Anthony some things that smells! Shoes and socks and underwear! Put it in a box, now light the candles, and drip wax in the box have Buster smell this whole (holy) process dogs grieve through smell!
They do everything through smell.

The wake needs to be full on for the concept to sink in, Blaster looks smart but she may, this late in the game, resist. It is fine, she needs to see that you understand her,and will be the one the replacement and her new best friend. Do this just her and you no one else no dogs or kids, just one on one cry and hold her tight, she will get that you need her too,
She needs you too !

Please every one, I have given this deep thought, spent the last three or four hours since before it got dark thinking and returning rereading Tobia's post. Now that I have reread my share, I am here for you if you need to also share.

What are you looking at , girl?
pare you looking at me?
Yup She is 15!!

Gnome Ofthe Diabase

climber

Out Of Bed

Feb 25, 2015 - 07:42am PT

[Click to View YouTube Video]
We had a doberman /Grate Dane Mix for 13+ years he was the best !! (Dobee'daner)
A Horse sized dog who Passed on Halloween 2005, The next two years Halloween was canceled both times due to amazing storms here on the east coast.
Don't try and tell me that My Big Guy didn't have a hand init!!
HE LOVED HALLOWEEN and we do to but forever now for me It is bittersweet.
[Click to View YouTube Video]

SC seagoat

Trad climber

Santa Cruz, or In What Time Zone Am I?

Feb 25, 2015 - 09:36am PT

Blaster. What a name. I am so sorry for his and your loss.
That picture of them together just radiates such deep love.

Susan

Tobia

Social climber

Denial

Feb 25, 2015 - 10:30am PT

Chiloe, thanks for your kind words.

Gnome, your suggestion might be the ticket, as i have been scratchin' my brain to find some way to complete the triangle. i will have to find a way to occupy Lola and Emma while the ceremony takes place, they will be awful jealous while i am alone with Blaster.

i won't be getting Blaster for a week or so, as my brother is not quite ready to turn her offer.

Susan, only Anthony could come up like a name like that for a dog, female at that. she is a blast, so maybe that was the motivation. I have had to say Blastette when talking about her to avoid referring to her as "him" or "he".

Her Service Dog registration states she is an "English Deer Hound mix breed", Anthony must have had a hand in that as well.

saa

Social climber

sadly, far away from yos and josh

Feb 25, 2015 - 01:09pm PT

The little grey pup doesn't have glasses yet cause she's too young to read.

saa

Social climber

sadly, far away from yos and josh

Feb 25, 2015 - 01:26pm PT

thekidcormier, is that a 100%, 80% canis lupus?

happygrrl, not having read the almost 4000 posts, I guess Lucas is with you cause Teddy is no longer. Sorry. He was quiet old , 14 maybe, when we met in JTree late 2011 or early 2012.

Happiegrrrl2

Trad climber

Feb 25, 2015 - 01:33pm PT

Tobia, you can sit with Blaster and think in images, to convey where her master went. Then, imagine images in which you explain that you will take over for Anthony, will help her through her grieving, and will care for her.

Maybe some people don't believe in animal communication, but this is the way those who do believe talk with animals. Even if one doesn't believe, or doesn't know if they do, it won't hurt to do this.

Best of luck to you and Blaster. We look forward to seeing future images!

Tobia

Social climber

Denial

Feb 27, 2015 - 02:57pm PT

Thanks happygrrrl2.

Any veterinarians or animal psychologist out there?

i screwed up royally yesterday. Anthony's parents wanted me to keep Blaster for the weekend while they went to 'hotlanta to visit my niece. i had the feeling it might confuse Blaster; but didn't say as much. Actually I was excited and hyped about having her here and watching her play.

i screwed up by meeting my brother in town and picking Blaster up and returning home with Blaster in my truck. When i arrived home, my two dogs come running to the truck as usual to let them welcome me home (it is a good thing to be loved).

i opened the door and Blaster looked sheepishly down, my dogs looked up "as if to say, "what's this?". I helped Blaster down and let Lola and Emma check her out. I knew Lola would do the Alpha routine and expected Blaster to be submissive to that.

That happened according to script; at least for about 30 seconds. Emma, started barking and Lola followed. i led Blaster out into the yard, thinking things would settle down; but it escalated into a frenzy of confusion on my and Blaster's part and bullying by Lola and Emma. Blaster was still calm just standing their with her tail tucked and going through the routine; but soon tired of it and started snarling. Before I could break it up, Lola and Blaster tied it up. i was still hopeful it was more display than a fight; but was wrong. Blaster ripped Lola's ear and was ready for more. i don't think she intentionally drew blood, i think it was accidental.

i pulled Lola away and left Blaster standing there, Emma had backed off, she is no fighter. Lola was bleeding like a stuck pig and i picked her up and went inside, to get something to control the bleeding, sulfur powder.

i had another brother come out to sit with Blaster while I took Lola to the vet for some stitches. Her ear was split about 2 inches up from the tip. Emma went along from the ride.

i posed some questions to the vet about what to expect when i got home, if this could be overcome, etc., she gave me some positive responses; but i could tell she had some reservations.

Cutting to the chase, i returned home with a partially sedated dog, hoping this would make things easier. i opened the door and there was Blaster sitting by my brother with her usual peaceful demeanor; but within seconds she was snarling and the frenzy started over again, i couldn't tell if it was posturing for dominance, survival or what. i didn't waste anytime dragging Lola away by her hind legs and having my brother take Blaster home with him.

And now i am thinking that, if given a cooling off period, whether or not i should try a reintroduction, this time with Anthony's dad delivering Blaster. i phoned the vet and she didn't think there would be any different outcome, basing it on Blaster's pedigree. i believe Blaster is too cool to want to brawl again; but am not sure if i can handle the stress of a bloodbath.

i spent years working with bird dogs, a kennel of 30 (+ or -). In the course of that experience we had some real flesh tearing and vengeance among certain dogs. we could never let certain dogs on the ground with the one they clashed with, some couldn't be put in a dog box or kennel near the other ones. Those that had these terminal grudges, were unforgiving. i can't remember what seed the grudges sprouted from, except the fertile soil of their competitive nature and personalities. Working bird dogs are different from pets in many ways; but in the end they are dogs. i only mention this because it may play out the same here at home and that isn't an option.

Pardon my excessive verbiage here; but i'm looking for some advice to depend on the use of the use of trial and error, or worse, not try and not provide Blaster a welcome mat for the rest of her days.

this just in

climber

Justin Ross from North Fork

Mar 2, 2015 - 07:36pm PT

Dahlia has a new favorite show
Meanwhile Adu isn't impressed

this just in

climber

Justin Ross from North Fork

Mar 2, 2015 - 09:45pm PT

Tobia, maybe try one on one in a neutral environment. Your dogs might have felt like they needed to defend their home. Good luck.

nita

Social climber

chica de chico, I don't claim to be a daisy.

Mar 2, 2015 - 10:48pm PT

Tobia, damn...Sorry to hear about your doggie situation ...)-;.....

I have no advise, but i hope things work out....If they don't, can one of your other brothers take Blaster?...you could still be the Uncle......

Poor Lola....

Jan

Mountain climber

Colorado, Nepal & Okinawa

Mar 2, 2015 - 11:44pm PT

Dogs generally should be introduced on neutral ground. Once they know each other and have had fun together someplace like a dog park, then they normally can accept the new dog. The other thing is to have them in the same place but chained or in separate pens or in separate rooms with dog gates until they get used to each other. Even so, they may fight when they get together until one establishes dominance over the other. At least you're lucky that Emma is not aggressive so two dogs don't gang up on one.

You're the alpha dog so you have to be in charge and let all the dogs know that Blaster is there to stay and they have to get used to it. It also helps if they can associate something fun with the other dog. Can you take them for a long ride or for a walk or to a dog park by separating them in the car? Soon they will conclude that they can do fun things if they don't fight. If they do fight, load them in the car and take them home immediately and let them know that is not acceptable.

I took care of a friend's dog when he was in the hospital and she attacked my little sheltie when he got close to the place where she was chained outside (I didn't have a fence then) Later, I took them out to run in the jungle but kept her tied in the back of the car so no fights while I was driving. She was so happy to go for long walks off leash that she left my dog alone.

Later after about a week I brought her in the house and chained her to the kitchen table until she could see what our routine was (I also had three cats). After about 2 weeks I could have her loose in the house and she didn't bother anyone as she had her bed under the table and knew her place and routine and my two dogs were ok because under the table was not a place they ever thought of as their own.

It's worth a try for you to confine them within sight of each other but not able to come in contact and make it clear that you like all of them and you are not happy when they behave aggressively. You're the alpha for all of them and they want to please you. The hounds were not family house pets so that was different.

Gnome Ofthe Diabase

climber

Out Of Bed

Mar 4, 2015 - 04:21pm PT

Well just now two hours ago our daisy left us
and
as quietly and happily as any dog of ours has ever left us
pray for my children who do not know
and
for my wife and I who are devastated!!

``"
`
Rest in peace, Daisy and thank you so much for the years of love we will always Cherish
the fine soul that was with us and you!