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jonnyrig
climber
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Feb 20, 2017 - 08:06pm PT
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So this is your place to vent, and to work it through, I ask again, what's good in your life? If it's not a simple question, then it bears some introspect. As a writer, you must have the ability to look into other's lives in such a manner; but is that also a personal ability or is it painful to even ask?
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bvb
Social climber
flagstaff arizona
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Feb 20, 2017 - 08:12pm PT
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ß Î Ø T Ç H
Boulder climber
ne'er–do–well
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Feb 20, 2017 - 08:18pm PT
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same
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Patrick Sawyer
climber
Originally California now Ireland
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Topic Author's Reply - Feb 20, 2017 - 08:22pm PT
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No Johnyrig,it is not impersonal to ask. I have laid myself out there, more so than my detractors, because for all my stupid posts, I am honest, and look at my previous posts, some that have been used against me, is there one shred of falsehood? Perhaps bias on my part, yes. I admit to that. and I expressed that openly.
Yes, I could have presented my views in a better manner, but I failed in that. I guess.
I do not seem to want to be presumptuous, but what I write as a professional, will long be remembered over what I write here or indeed, what any poster writes here.
The likes of Cosmic and Russ can scoff at me, and with good reason some, but when my mind is in order, I can skewer their voices. Because ultimately, the truth does will out.
Not some shrill voices who can point to my stupid writings on this forum. I admit to those, but I have never heard or seen those voices admit to their own mistakes, or lies, or mistruths.
Hoist me up on a petard Russ and cosmic, to your own downfall.
I admit my mistakes, my faults. I recognise where I went wrong, so to speak. But you guys cannot admit as such, and that will be your downfall. My arrogance has learned humility, but you people, cannot see the woods through the trees.
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Russ Walling
Social climber
from Poofters Froth, Wyoming
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Feb 20, 2017 - 08:31pm PT
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Patrick: this entire shit_show is because you lied... you said you "have not insulted people". Obviously you have. That is all this is about. You lying. Simple really.
You are trying to make this into something else, but it's not. Surely you can understand this. Your truth winning out smokescreen is just that: a deflection, trying once again to blame someone else for your own shortcomings.
In the end, just own your sh#t. Easy.
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F
climber
away from the ground
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Feb 20, 2017 - 08:36pm PT
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The seamstress and the the wordsmith have a heart to heart.
Is that a tear in my eye or just gas?
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Patrick Sawyer
climber
Originally California now Ireland
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Topic Author's Reply - Feb 20, 2017 - 08:37pm PT
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Funny Stonemaster. your post is making me to reconsider and to ask ChrisMac (you know who he is don't you, since you have been posting here since 2005 like I have) to rescind my request to delete me from the Taco Stand.
Okay, I have made some very stupid posts, but I am still here. And at least I am mature enough to admit my mistakes. I have not seen that from my detractors, because, they have never made mistakes, ohhhhhh, they are perfect, like Sir Donald.
No gosh darn it, I may have made stupid posts, but I will fight you Trumpies. My forefathers did not create America to cede it to mindless fools.
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jonnyrig
climber
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Feb 20, 2017 - 08:44pm PT
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Honest, to a degree perhaps. Yet, the question remains unanswered. Reflect upon it awhile. Digress if you must. But answer, if not for me, then for yourself. Reach out, lash out, smoke out. Whatever floats your boat to unfamiliar shores. You, and only you, have to decide what next. Peace. May you find some. The sun will rise tomorrow, will you enjoy it? Or will it burn your soul?
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Patrick Sawyer
climber
Originally California now Ireland
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Topic Author's Reply - Feb 20, 2017 - 08:46pm PT
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cosmic, you may have not noticed, but you can edit your posts. I assume dong should be doing. How is Crabapple Valley, sir dong. Cosmic I my make a fool of myself and then see my ways, but you make a fool of yourself and thinks it betters you.
yeah damnit I am in for a good round of your bullshit versus my knowledge and experience.
fire away Mr Cosmic, and don't forget to bring Russ along.
I have admitted my mistakes and they make me that much stronger.
Jonnyrig, so are you suggesting I just sit by and let these gobsjites spout their BS?
It is not in my nature. I admitted my shortcomings and that makes me all the stronger.
heck, it is almost 4:30 am I am going to bed and I will not think of these guys. I will think how I can get my new company moving forward. And Betty the kitten, she wants to type more as she tries to cross the keyboard. I hope she is not a fervent red neck. Yikes. And Russ and Cosmic, chill and I will too.
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Russ Walling
Social climber
from Poofters Froth, Wyoming
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Feb 20, 2017 - 08:50pm PT
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Patrick:
Go to f*#king bed... you've lost the plot.
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pud
climber
Sportbikeville & Yucca brevifolia
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Feb 20, 2017 - 08:53pm PT
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No gosh darn it, I may have made stupid posts, but I will fight you Trumpies. My forefathers did not create America to cede it to mindless fools.
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rick sumner
Trad climber
reno, nevada/ wasilla alaska
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Feb 20, 2017 - 08:54pm PT
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They're coming to take him away, he he ha ha
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Patrick Sawyer
climber
Originally California now Ireland
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Topic Author's Reply - Feb 20, 2017 - 09:00pm PT
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Yeah Russ, I just wrote that, it is bed time. And before the other threads were locked I had written (in Word, it is a good useful tool to use before posting) that I (for once) agreed with you, Wade's ongoing repetitive memes were tiring.
I think cosmic and you are okay guys. So we disagree, perhaps vehemently, but it is sort of fun trading barbs. And at least I can admit when I am wrong. Can you?
I am hitting the sack, much too late. Take care, until another day.
Gosh I am now a boss again. The last time I was... an editor with three editorial staff under me. between that I was a full-time carer for Jennie, 24/7 for over four years. I tried my best, everyone (but the one social worker looking for brownie points - so I was told) said I was a good carer, her doctors, her friends, the public health nurse, then we moved to the sticks, in hindsight not a good move for her, but I thought... and yes lads I still cry today for my... my... my not knowing what the hell I was doing. I thought I knew, but dementia is not ...
We can fight it.
EDIT
One more thing. I believe in my views, but sometimes my frustration shows through, and I get, agitated so to to speak. I see a counsellor from time to time. I miss jennie and she wants to see me, but because I f*#ked up and fought the social worker, my mistake, big time... there are dynamics here. I do not have an outlet, some friends here, my landlord, an excellent chap, he says he will pay for the solicitor and court costs for visitation rights, but it is not that simple, Jennie wants to see me, my sister-in-law from California saw her and she said she wants to see me. Shades of one flew over the cuckoo's nest.
Why am I even pouring out my guts, some of you guys hate me
I need to sleep, I hardly get one nowadays or the last two years.
I tried, I had a week booked for ice climbing on Ben Nevis, and my Day Skipper course, but Jennie fell ill and that all went out the window. I visited her twice a day every day for 58 days in St Vincent's, I brought her home, her relapse two year later in 2012, 51 days in St Columcille's, I was there every day, twice a day.
Yeah in Dalkey, the quarry was a five minute walk from the front door. I could climb, free soloed a lot VS to HVS, some E1 or so (5.10 a/b). But I could not leave her long, I had electric gates put in (we lived at the end of a cul-de-sac).
I am tired and if I have ever insulted anybody on this forum, I am sorry. I apologise.
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rottingjohnny
Sport climber
Sands Motel , Las Vegas
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Feb 20, 2017 - 09:24pm PT
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We all have struggles...Learn to embrace them...
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rottingjohnny
Sport climber
Sands Motel , Las Vegas
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Feb 20, 2017 - 09:28pm PT
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F
climber
away from the ground
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Feb 20, 2017 - 10:00pm PT
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Russ Walling
Social climber
from Poofters Froth, Wyoming
Feb 20, 2017 - 08:38pm PT
The seamstress and the the wordsmith have a heart to heart.
LOL! yeah...I applaud you on your insight
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Patrick Sawyer
climber
Originally California now Ireland
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Topic Author's Reply - Feb 20, 2017 - 10:01pm PT
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Yeah the Sound of Music. Violins in the background.
Isn't it past your bedtimes?
I am like the cartoon that RottingJohnny put up,a sad sack.
Have you ever been busted in Escalon? I have for no good reason (released within hours). Detained in Manteca, Escalon and Oakdale because of a "hippie painted truck" (Bridwell loved it as it was parked in C4 car park).
I miss California.
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ionlyski
Trad climber
Kalispell, Montana
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Feb 20, 2017 - 10:19pm PT
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Patrick. yeah I've been having a few struggles lately myself. Trying to find my feet again. Been thinking climbing might be my way out.
I think you drink. I think you get sauced and then post some pretty down and out victim type of sh#t. And that's pretty hard for most people to take. Once or twice and you might tend to get some concern but after awhile it starts to have that broken record feel.
Just like Russ says. Go to sleep. Then try to have just 5 beers tomorrow. Then 4, 3, and see if you can hold at 2 for a bit. Eventually cut it down to 1 every other day or so.
Oops, forgot you're in Ireland. OK, same thing then except substitute with Jamison.
Arne
good luck. It's hard; currently I know only too well.
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atchafalaya
Boulder climber
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Feb 20, 2017 - 10:20pm PT
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You do.
It's like a meth addict with no writing ability decided to commit suicide by keyboard.
Wtf.
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