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Emmy04
Boulder climber
Sheridan, WY
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Also wanted to share a photo. Last weekend I rallied up a team to walk in the Out Of The Darkness walk for suicude awareness and prevention. We were proud to walk for Team Tanner. I made us all shirts that said "Team Tanner" on the back. But I made a special one, just for him, that read "The best view comes after the hardest climb". I want to believe he's in Heaven now, with the best view he's ever had. I know he found that day comforting because he told me so. He said he loved me so much and appreciated all that I had done and he felt so loved and supported. I'm glad he got that in his last days and that I was able to be a big part of it.
Thanks again for the love and support.
xoxo
-Em
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Pete_N
Trad climber
Santa Cruz, CA
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I'm so sorry to hear this Sarah. Your efforts were an inspiration and were certainly not in vain. Pete
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guyman
Social climber
Moorpark, CA.
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This is so sad...
My condolences to Tanner and his Family and many Friends.
Rest in Peace
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Clint Cummins
Trad climber
SF Bay area, CA
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I'm sorry to hear this, Sarah.
You gave it your best and got him that second chance.
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phylp
Trad climber
Upland, CA
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I am very sorry to hear this.
RIP, Tanner.
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kunlun_shan
Mountain climber
SF, CA
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Emily and Sarah,
I'm sad and so sorry that you and your family are going through this. Hopefully Tanner is in a better place and finally at peace. You all did your utmost, and I'm glad Tanner knew how much he is loved.
Wishing you, your family, and Tanner's friends the best,
Terry
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Late Starter
Social climber
South Dakota
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This is heartbreaking. I'm so sorry for your loss.
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SC seagoat
Trad climber
Santa Cruz, Moab, A sailboat, or some time zone
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So very sorry to learn of this.
You guys worked so hard but sometimes the ache is just to much.
You'll carry Tanner forward.
Susan
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Sarah Kindle
Boulder climber
Sheridan, Wyoming
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Topic Author's Reply - Oct 5, 2016 - 01:31pm PT
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Please don't delete this thread, because this morning I was having a rough time and really missing him. I turned to the Super Taco!! You guys are all amazing and helped me get through a rough few minutes. If it's okay. If not I understand. This is just such an amazing group of people. ❤️ Damn I miss him.
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labrat
Trad climber
Erik O. Auburn, CA
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So very sorry to hear of your loss Sarah. The only people that could delete this topic would be you or the admin or owner of this site. I don't see any reason that they would do so. I believe your memories will be preserved on this site for many many years to come.
Erik
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John M
climber
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Hi Sarah, Its unlikely the admins will delete this thread, so the only way it will be closed is if you delete your first post. That causes the thread to be closed and no one can then post to it. It also deletes the title, so it won't show up unless you search for it.
If you want it to stay. Then it will. And if you want to keep posting to it, then by all means do. There are lots of us here with experience with this, and we want to help. Plus its a reminder to those going through a rough time what happens to those they leave behind. So please don't feel bad about sharing your loss. I believe firmly that its the exposure of these things, the loss, the pain, but also what those who are dealing with suicidal thoughts go through, that will help overcome what I see as almost an epidemic. People get embarrassed, and so for years, suicide was something people just didn't talk about. And many people suffered in silence.
I know that I rarely talked about what I was going through, for years and years. When I finally had a complete breakdown in my late 40s, both physical and mental, there were many people that I was friends with and who I worked with that had no idea that I even dealt with depression. Because it just wasn't okay to talk about, and I was embarrassed. In public I am usually a very upbeat person, but privately I was often dealing with tremendous demons. I shared the private side of my life with very few people. And even among the few I did share with, even fewer of those even understood just how difficult it was, for how could they, they hadn't experienced it. Or if they had experienced some level of depression, it was something they just got over as life moved on. So they believed that was how it was supposed to be for everyone.
Thankfully, today, its becoming easier to talk about depression and suicide. It still makes some people very uncomfortable, but many others are learning how to deal. Its still a terrible and difficult subject, but now people feel freer to talk and I believe that that is a good thing. So I encourage you to keep talking.
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Jaybro
Social climber
Wolf City, Wyoming
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Bump
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neebee
Social climber
calif/texas
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hey there say, sarah and emmyo4... oh my, i was ready to send another card, and i just stopped here, to make sure of the address, or email if i had to...
and... i saw this... :(
very very sorry for you loss...
yes, there are things deep inside others, that we will not fully understand...
but, he knew your all loved him, AND THAT is what matters...
love and prayers... and my condolences to your family and loved ones...
oh my, and his mom looked so very happy, :(
you all did, just having him starting to recover and be there, with
you as a family... oh my, hugs and prayers to you all...
god bless in some way, beyond us, that will help you
all through this...
just sent an email to sarah... as, i want to send you a note/and card...
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thebravecowboy
climber
The Good Places
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your family's experience with Tanner's rocky road has made it easier for me to engage those around me about their mental/emotional needs and about mine. thank you for sharing your brother, his troubles, your family's difficult time with us. it helps other people, too.
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Emmy04
Boulder climber
Sheridan, WY
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Oct 10, 2016 - 07:17pm PT
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Hi everyone.
Thanks for all the messages and love and prayers. Was just missing our boy so desperately that I ended up back here. This thread still offers comfort in a time of need. Just a different kind of need. I so appreciate it.
Tanner's sister and I were looking at all of his gear hangin in his closet and what I really want to do is put it to use. But we're both new to this whole thing and not sure where to start. Any suggestions? I want to feel what he felt on the top of his climbs. And I want that for his sister, too. Any beginner's resource recommendations much appreciated.
Also, wanted to share his obituary with you in case anyone wanted to read it. Here's the link:
http://www.sheridanmedia.com/obituary/tanner-f-schoonmaker
Love to all,
Emily
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thebravecowboy
climber
The Good Places
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Oct 10, 2016 - 07:25pm PT
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man, I was all good until I hit the bit about Charlie and Tizzy. and the mutual protection of close siblings.
thanks for sharing the obit. you're not alone shedding tears on this.
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Clint Cummins
Trad climber
SF Bay area, CA
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Oct 10, 2016 - 10:17pm PT
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Thanks for sharing that, Emily.
For local beginning climbing resources, it would help to find someone who lives locally and would know. I'd try asking Allie Rainey:
http://allirainey.com/home/
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Sarah Kindle
Boulder climber
Sheridan, Wyoming
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Topic Author's Reply - Jan 27, 2017 - 03:32pm PT
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Wow. It's funny how much this forum has done for me when I'm really missing mu not. It's crazy. His birthday would have been next month on the 12th, the first's are always the hardest. His sister is having a rough time, His parents too. As to be expected. I I just wanted to thank you all Again. This forum puts peace in my heart and soul. ❤🏞
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Gnome Ofthe Diabase
climber
Out Of Bed
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Feb 12, 2017 - 04:07pm PT
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Well Then !
HAPPY BIRTHDAY TO THE FAMILY & TANNER, TOO
This thread? It was a reply to a call for help,
It was a prayer we all shared
We had hoped to make the sunshine as bright as we could
To bring to bare the heat and love of those out here
We care , it is still understood, Climbing has always been
Where Mis-fits could 'Fit' in.
We stood in and leaned in too
( wow that was cool that we got him out on the rocks again)
We are all still here for you and the Family
Have them post?, If we can we will
Help in any way that you think we can,
Sending light and love and prayers
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