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Sarah Kindle

Boulder climber
Sheridan, Wyoming
Topic Author's Original Post - Jul 24, 2016 - 02:16pm PT
Hello. I'm writing this from a small town in Wyoming. I'm not sure if you can help but at this point I'm reaching out to whom I think can help. I have a brilliant, smart, handsome, 24 year old cousin that lived for rock climbing. He achieved a lot of amazing climbs at the young age of 24. It was the only way he found peace. He suffers from severe mental illness and 2 months ago tried to take his own life. With a miracle he survived, but sadly tried again a week ago. He is committed to a hospital here and will be in rehab for a long while. As I stated, his only peace was climbing. It's going to be a long road and I know he's not done living. I asked him today if he wanted to
climb again sand he said "no". It shocked me because he would do anything to climb. I am just praying he gets through this awful trajedy and will climb again. It's going to be a very long road but I'm never giving up and have faith that he will be okay. Im sure you are wondering what I'm writing for. I'm looking for any climbers that may be willing to send him a letter. Even if just a few short words. I want to fill the walls in his room with pictures and stories, letters and notes from family. I just know his story isn't over yet. I know I'm asking for a lot, but it's his life and I'd do anything to help him get better. If this is something that can be done please let me know. My name is Sarah Kindle and we are from Sheridan, Wyoming. If something is sent, it would have to be sent to me because I don't know how long he will be here, as they may move him to a larger, more equipped facility. I thank you in advance for taking the time to read this, and if nothing else please pray for Tanner Schoonmaker. I know he's got a lot of climbs left in him.

Sarah Kindle
854 Emerson
Sheridan, Wyoming 82801
overwatch

climber
Arizona
Jul 24, 2016 - 02:32pm PT
It might help if you provide people an email to send letters to. Or are you looking for people to actually send physical letters via snail mail?
bluering

Trad climber
Santa Clara, CA
Jul 24, 2016 - 02:41pm PT
I'll send a letter, and an invite!

If you're depressed, come out to California, I'll make ya happy to be living in Wyoming. But I can show ya how to make it here too.

Seriously, I can fix this. Let me talk to him. I usually fix other kinds of problems but I think I can get this kid dialed.

Needs perspective, and vision. I am not joking.
SC seagoat

Trad climber
Santa Cruz, Moab, A sailboat, or some time zone
Jul 24, 2016 - 02:53pm PT
Hi Sarah, I'm sure there are folks that want to help, and I believe your appeal is likely legitimate. However a number of us are skeptical about scams and the like. Especially on such a public board.
Posting something to you with our return address on it may not be in the comfort zone for many of us.
I'm not adverse to sending you a note to pass on to him but I will be doing it with no return information.
Perhaps you can post the name of his facility even if it is short time.
Best of luck to your brother and a really lovely gesture to help him.

Susan
johntp

Trad climber
socal
Jul 24, 2016 - 06:09pm PT
Paging the neebster.

I'm not a card or letter guy but wishing the best for him. We all go through crap in our early years.
neebee

Social climber
calif/texas
Jul 24, 2016 - 08:51pm PT
hey there say, sarah... oh my, :O :(


i will sure start praying... i know another gal, who will, as well...

we will see what we can do about cards, too...

(might have to keep the return address, off, as sue mentioned, since
this is all new here) ...


but you sure got the prayers in his corner now...


let's hope this time, he can really 'climb' out of this dark hole, and
keep his spirit and life, up...
amen...
phylp

Trad climber
Upland, CA
Jul 24, 2016 - 09:12pm PT
I will send something when I get back home.
Mid -20s is a very tough time for people struggling with mental illness.
It's a beautiful idea, what you are doing.
Best wishes to you.
overwatch

climber
Arizona
Jul 25, 2016 - 09:52am PT
You could almost say that being in your twenties is a mental illness. Certainly was for me...oh yeah, bump.
fear

Ice climber
hartford, ct
Jul 25, 2016 - 10:02am PT
You could almost say that being in your twenties is a mental illness. Certainly was for me...oh yeah, bump.

Ditto that...

However, there are 1000 permutations of "mental illness"... We can only hope he finds peace.

Climbing isn't a cure for anything, he's got to find peace in his own skin first.

SC seagoat

Trad climber
Santa Cruz, Moab, A sailboat, or some time zone
Jul 25, 2016 - 10:27am PT
Good job Locker and Coz!
Great idea about getting him to get on ST!
Gotta get over through this dark side...he sounds like a nice young man!

Susan
the Fet

climber
Tu-Tok-A-Nu-La
Jul 25, 2016 - 10:31am PT
Hopefully you can print this out for him.

Hi Tanner,

As a fellow climber, I'm wishing you the best. A few people close to me have dealt with mental illness and I see how tough it is. I believe it often comes down to chemical imbalances in the brain and you can't defeat it with willpower alone. It's not your fault and it's not the result of something you did wrong. It's just a challenge of the body/genetics/environment you happen to have. You need to "go through the motions" of doing all the things that your are supposed to do to help such as: trying to sleep from about 11PM to 7AM, getting exercise every day, eating well, thinking positively as much as possible, etc. Even if it doesn't seem to help, I think in the long term it does and it certainly doesn't hurt and really everyone should be doing these things anyway. In addition I believe in many cases medication is simply the best way to treat these chemical imbalances. Listen to your doctors and professionals. The have studied and are experts in helping people.

Don't give up on climbing. Climbing is a great analogy for life. Climbing is a simplified version of the challenges we all face and the strategies to address it. Set goals. What do you want to climb? What climbs are on your bucket list? Let me suggest Snake Dike if you haven't done it. A superfun, moderate climb, to one of the most magical places on the planet. Having a goal give you something to look forward to, something to plan for, a good/productive use of your time, something to train for, something to dream about.

And climbing is also an example of taking things one step at a time. When you climb a big wall it's VERY overwhelming. If you think about all the pitches and all the difficulties of a huge cliff you can get discouraged. Once you know what you want to do (get to the top of El Cap for example) and make a plan, then focus on the next move. The next hold. The next gear placement. Just focus on what's in front of you and deal with that. Keep doing that and soon you are at the top of the pitch. Look up at the next pitch and then again focus on that first move of the belay. Then the next. Put some time into planning for the future now and then, but then shift gears and focus on the now.

Wishing you Aloha,
Steve Fettke

JEleazarian

Trad climber
Fresno CA
Jul 25, 2016 - 10:49am PT
I'll write a personal letter, but I want to take adavantage of the speed of the internet. Tanner, many climbers I know suffer from depression. The one I know best, me, in particular. Climbing seems to attract us.

A little over ten years ago I reached my personal end. Fortunately, I got medical and psychological help. I also discovered what you're going to discover -- a great many people love you, and would miss you greatly, and are ready to show that love in action.

As Steve Fettke wrote above, recovery from depression doesn't happen all at once. Rather, we take small steps that eventually cover a great distance. I'll send you details of my own journey when I write, but I'll say this now. I saw no way out, and would never have believed in 2005 where I would be in 2016.

You have lots of people pulling for you, and some of us praying for you. If you're like I was, you won't believe it, but you have a future of good, not bad things. I wish you the best, and will be happy to do anything I can if and when you ask.

John Eleazarian
ß Î Ø T Ç H

Boulder climber
ne'er–do–well
Jul 25, 2016 - 06:57pm PT
OP/ Suprema - thread titles always end with her period

Looking for help.
kunlun_shan

Mountain climber
SF, CA
Jul 25, 2016 - 08:16pm PT
^ ß Î Ø T Ç H, I was suspicious as well, so did a bunch of searching, which initially made me think it might be you know who, due to leads that went nowhere. I finally managed to find contact info for the OP's sister in Sheridan and just got off the phone from talking with her.

She confirmed the story about Tanner, and that Sarah was going to try contact some climbers. I recommended she try get Tanner on the Taco, and also to print out the posts for him.

edit - there are some exceptional posts on this thread for Tanner! Sometimes ST can really deliver.
Sarah Kindle

Boulder climber
Sheridan, Wyoming
Topic Author's Reply - Jul 25, 2016 - 08:31pm PT
WOW! I'm so incredibly touched by all who took the time to read my email. I am in awe of the response. He really isn't ready for internet yet, but I will be working on it with him. I know I'm being very personal here, but at this point, I'm willing to do anything I can to help him. I just have to. I figured if I reached out across the Country and got even just a few replies, it may make a difference. When you are looking at a person you love so much and the hurt and sadness in thier eyes is so deep, you do anything you can think of that just may help. I know snail mail is old fashion, but I thought of that because I want to cover the concrete walls in the terrible room they have him in now, with what inspires him to keep trying..... Climbing and family. It probably seemed a bit sketchy to some of you and for that I apologize. I understand if you want to leave your return address off the card if sent by mail. I'm just so incredibly thankful for all of you amazing people. He's going to climb again, I just know he will. He just needs prayers, good energy, letters, emails. Anything would truly mean the world to him. I'm attaching a few pictures of this beautiful soul I get to call my cousin! Thank you! Thank you!!

Emmy04

Boulder climber
Sheridan, WY
Jul 25, 2016 - 08:32pm PT
Hi all!

My name is Emily and I am Sarah's sister & Tanner's cousin. Thank you to the gentleman that just gave me a phone call to inform me about your forum. My sister had mentioned reaching out to some climbers for Tanner's sake, I just didn't realize she reached out to ALL of them :)

Thank you to everyone that has shared a message and/or personal story for us to share with Tanner. I know that he will find comfort in them. I am overwhelmed by the response this has gotten and thank you deeply for showing us that the climbing world does not lack for compassion and empathy. Tanner's passion for getting to the top of the climb has not failed him yet and we continue to pray that the same passion carried him through this part of his journey.

Sarah has a heart of gold and, clearly, would go to the end of the world for the ones she loves. I just spoke with her and I know she plans on popping in very soon to follow up and go through the responses. As you can imagine, this is a very trying time for our family and we are just doing our best to hold each other up. I understand from my chat with Terry that her absence may have come off as suspicious, but I assure you that she is nothing but pure love trying to do anything she can to shower our cousin in support and encouragement.

Again, thank you, deeply, for your support. I cannot even begin to tell you the mountains you're moving by showing this sort of love to our guy.

Sincerely,
Emily
Sarah Kindle

Boulder climber
Sheridan, Wyoming
Topic Author's Reply - Jul 25, 2016 - 09:16pm PT
I'm not sure, I will ask him. I am really just blown away by the rock climbing community. I can not thank you enough for your kind words.
Flip Flop

climber
Earth Planet, Universe
Jul 25, 2016 - 09:36pm PT

Sunny side up kid. Lots to look forward to.
Sarah Kindle

Boulder climber
Sheridan, Wyoming
Topic Author's Reply - Jul 26, 2016 - 10:58am PT
Those of you have replied have really made an impact on him! I haven't seen him smile this way in a long time. Sending love and light from Shridan, Wyoming!! Thank you for your support. ❤️❤️
neebee

Social climber
calif/texas
Jul 26, 2016 - 11:25am PT
hey there say, sarah and emmy04... just got some stamps, and am
sending a card...

so very glad to see the updates, here...

for tanner:
so many folks here, having been through so much,
they sure know good stuff to share...

stop on by, when you can...
the smiles will grow and the strength WILL come...
it takes good team work...

amen... :)
Messages 1 - 20 of total 153 in this topic << First  |  < Previous  |  Show All  |  Next >  |  Last >>
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