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happiegrrrl
Trad climber
www.climbaddictdesigns.com
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Mar 27, 2014 - 04:15pm PT
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My niece just posted this on FB
It has recently been brought to my attention of a phenomenon I will call "urinal back splash", meaning that due to the shape or possible unclean-ness/un-drainingability of a urinal about 80% of men and boys are walking around with pee pants. So remember this the next time you loving touch your mans knee in the car or at dinner, because his pee knees are your pee hands
I don't think I needed to be aware of that.
As for poop - when Teddy was so sick last winter, he wouldn't eat,nor poop. He had made a decent poop the day before he became ill, but...he had eaten dinner after that, so I knew he had it in him. It was horrible watching him go so many days without eating, or pooping.
When the doc got him back stable, we headed off, and at first stop he went over to the side door of the van to let me know he needed to go out. I set him on the ground and he tottered over to a little cluster of weeds growing out of a crack in the hard desert ground.
I put him back in the van and he dove right for his food dish, then looked at me and gave me an "It's EMPTY?" look. "I haven't eaten in days and IT'S EMPTY????"
He could only have a little at a time, but over the next six hours, he had gotten a decent amount. We stopped at a 24 hour restaurant with a big back parking lot to stay overnight, and we went for his walk.
i could tell that it looked like he was thinking of going, but conditions weren't optimal. Teddy liked a clean bit of land to go poop, and it was pretty obvious that edging of rocks and decorative brush, strewn with paper trash and other garbage had been peed on by any number of dogs and men, and there was plenty dog poop in evidence too. It was gross.
But finally Teddy couldn't continue on his quest. He had to lay down those tracks. He assumed the stance ....nothing.
A little strain and....suddenly the dyke was breached and torrents of murky sludge shot out from his backside like a BP spill under pressure.
It was absolutely disgusting.
And the most beautiful poop I had ever witnessed.
Teddy seemed a little embarrassed, and also gave me a scolding look when I had to walk away from clean-up duty. I tried-really. But there was just no way to do it. I tried scooping nearby gravel and small rocks to cover, but the place was *that* dirty that it would have just been worse.
That night I reported to my FB network and Teddy got a round of applause. I posted "Should I take pictures?" and was quickly told "NO." I guess pictures would have crossed that TMI line.
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anita514
Gym climber
Great White North
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Topic Author's Reply - Mar 27, 2014 - 06:32pm PT
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This is the TMI thread; doesn't have to be only about poops so long as it's considered inappropriate by normal people.
Poops are fun, like farts. Or we can talk about MacGuyvering some sort of tampon from stuff in the woods, or weird anal leakage after laughing too hard, or, uhhhhhh maybe I should stop
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anita514
Gym climber
Great White North
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Topic Author's Reply - Mar 27, 2014 - 06:34pm PT
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Brandon: ask me no questions and I'll tell you no lies
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neebee
Social climber
calif/texas
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Mar 27, 2014 - 07:01pm PT
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hey there say, oh my...
just saw this and 'being out of touch with a lot of modern stuff', well,
i was curious what TMI meant... okay, got it now... :)
as to this and terry and teddy:
And the most beautiful poop I had ever witnessed.
well, i reckon, i just GOT to share this...
this was more under the heading of 'miracle poop' ...
the ol' OLD cat ate through the middle of a long thread, that was attached to a needle, and JUST KEPT ON EATING--threading it all down his throat, NEEDLE and all...
miracle, is: it and the thread, all turned up three days later, after a 'late' exit: all contained in ONE poop...
it was all compacted into a one INCH piece...
(the piece that is ON the paper)...
these photo is mainly AFTER i pulled it out, there were pieces stuck to the thread, but
it was ALL in one piece, AND the LONG NEEDLE... :O
:O
edit for terry:
and yep, the most beautiful, as well...
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mechrist
Gym climber
South of Heaven
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Mar 27, 2014 - 07:02pm PT
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I choked the plumbing with my 2' brown anaconda. About ready to release the pile of babies it left behind. One more cup of coffee, then I go...
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Kurt Ettinger
Trad climber
Martinez, CA
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Mar 27, 2014 - 07:21pm PT
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Excellent! Now I have a place to go for poop discussions when my 5 and 7 year old are not around.
Neebee- Wow! Talk about using up one of the nine lives.
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anita514
Gym climber
Great White North
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Topic Author's Reply - Mar 27, 2014 - 08:01pm PT
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I want some fish net shorts like that. Hook me up
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mechrist
Gym climber
South of Heaven
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Mar 27, 2014 - 08:03pm PT
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I drove from SoCal to Flagstaff and met a romantic interest at a party. I had to piss. After brief introductions I hobbled straight to the bathroom and started pissing. The toilet was empty. When I flushed a big turd surfaced and the toilet overflowed. I tried to plunge but it was too late. Talk about AWKWARD.
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drljefe
climber
El Presidio San Augustin del Tucson
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Mar 27, 2014 - 08:07pm PT
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There's a turtle head pokin' right now, in fact.
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anita514
Gym climber
Great White North
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Topic Author's Reply - Mar 27, 2014 - 08:10pm PT
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I hate dingleberries
Yes women get them too and it's usually my esthetician who tells me about them when I'm getting waxed. So embarrassing
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anita514
Gym climber
Great White North
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Topic Author's Reply - Mar 27, 2014 - 08:26pm PT
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As long as there's some 'murican skid marks on them
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apogee
climber
Technically expert, safe belayer, can lead if easy
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Mar 27, 2014 - 08:28pm PT
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bidets are the bestest
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Sanskara
climber
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Mar 27, 2014 - 08:54pm PT
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Anita
They have you on some pretty good meds or what?
Careful it's pretty easy to get attached to that stuff ;)
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anita514
Gym climber
Great White North
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Topic Author's Reply - Mar 27, 2014 - 09:11pm PT
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Oxycodone and OxyContin
I had my dressing changed yesterday and today I started my strut turns and went to... Work. Give me a break.
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overwatch
climber
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Mar 27, 2014 - 09:17pm PT
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Mechrist
You got scapefloated
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Sanskara
climber
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Mar 27, 2014 - 09:23pm PT
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Strut turns?
Back to work really!
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anita514
Gym climber
Great White North
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Topic Author's Reply - Mar 27, 2014 - 09:34pm PT
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no, the struts I need to adjust in order to lengthen.
perhaps a little too TMI for this thread? :/
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Sanskara
climber
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Mar 27, 2014 - 10:09pm PT
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Yikes..
You're my f*#king hero!
Really, I have zero circulation in both my feet right now to the point they are purple and freezing. It's driving me nuts but it seems like nothing compared to having to carry that contraption around with me for the next few months. I thought I was a handycap...
How long do you have that thing on for?
What was the deciding factor for having your surgery. Was the leg length discrepancy creating that big of problems for you, if so what kind?
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HighTraverse
Trad climber
Bay Area
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Mar 27, 2014 - 10:24pm PT
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now THAT's TMI!!
j/k
I was wondering why you were shacked up in a hospital. We hear such bad things about Canuck medical care. I'd guess you have to empty your own bedpan.
Or do you empty the one to your left etc all the way around the room?
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anita514
Gym climber
Great White North
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Topic Author's Reply - Mar 27, 2014 - 10:43pm PT
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I buzzed the nurses 3 times over an hour to get a bedpan and for pain. Luckily there was a clean bedpan on a chair not far from my bed so gimped over enough to reach and sat on it. What sucked is that I had to hold myself up for what seemed like forever until the nurse showed up to empty it. Good exercise I guess.
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