Atlantean Healing

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Messages 1 - 38 of total 38 in this topic
donini

Trad climber
Ouray, Colorado
Topic Author's Original Post - Dec 15, 2013 - 01:52am PT
I was just down in Sedona for a few days of rock climbing. I said to myself, when in Rome do as the Romans do, so i had an astral photograph taken. Much to my chagrin the photo revealed an otherwise invisible apple sized goiter growing out of my neck. I was told that it could only be cured by Atlantean Healing. Has anyone here ever had success with this therapy?

There is a supposedly great climb in the area named the Vortex....it's on my short list for my next visit.
Ward Trotter

Trad climber
Dec 15, 2013 - 02:18am PT


Before " Atlantean Healing" Tore aggressively marketed small busts of Karl Marx with Chia seed growth for Marx's beard, called "Chia Marx"

Credit: Ward Trotter
weezy

climber
Dec 15, 2013 - 02:23am PT
when i get that feeling, i need atlantean healing.
Wayno

Big Wall climber
Seattle, WA
Dec 15, 2013 - 02:32am PT
it could only be cured by Atlantean Healing

Bingo! That would be a dead giveaway to me that they are trying to mislead you. Only thing that can cure you is essentially yourself.

Well, hell, for two grand, I could get rid of that thing that they seem to have located.
donini

Trad climber
Ouray, Colorado
Topic Author's Reply - Dec 15, 2013 - 02:36am PT
Wayno.....i think that an Italian meal, cooked by you, would send that pesky (hard to see) goiter down the pike.
Wayno

Big Wall climber
Seattle, WA
Dec 15, 2013 - 02:46am PT
Any time, Jim. And I have the perfect wine for goiters.
moosedrool

climber
Stair climber, lost, far away from Poland
Dec 15, 2013 - 02:52am PT
Atlantean healing is the best holistic medicine, according to many Internet sources. I don't know why the Obamacare won't reimburse it. It is worth your money, though!
BLUEBLOCR

Social climber
joshua tree
Dec 15, 2013 - 02:53am PT
Try over lapping that photo with its negative
Wayno

Big Wall climber
Seattle, WA
Dec 15, 2013 - 03:14am PT
So Jim, I asked my atlantean contacts and all I could get was seaweed. Eat lots of seaweed. ;^)
BLUEBLOCR

Social climber
joshua tree
Dec 15, 2013 - 03:20am PT
I think in Sedona they prefer cactii over seaweed. Or maybe jus weed?
Wayno

Big Wall climber
Seattle, WA
Dec 15, 2013 - 03:30am PT
If I was in Sedona and had some time to kill, i would check it out. How much did they get you for, Jim? It would be interesting to see what they did or didn't find. I could almost already imagine it.
Randisi

Social climber
Dalian, Liaoning
Dec 15, 2013 - 05:33am PT
New Age = newage = sewage
Dingus Milktoast

Gym climber
U.N. Ambassador, Crackistan
Dec 15, 2013 - 08:19am PT
I have a sinking feeling about this cure.

DMT
eKat

Trad climber
Less than a second shy of 49 minutes
Dec 15, 2013 - 08:52am PT

I have a sinking feeling about this cure.

YerKillinMe!

:-)
franky

Trad climber
Bishop, CA
Dec 15, 2013 - 09:13am PT
Seems worth it!
stevep

Boulder climber
Salt Lake, UT
Dec 15, 2013 - 10:04am PT
The god of Atlantis is Poseidon. His symbol is a bull. You will be best served by sacrificing a bull and pouring the blood into the ocean at midnight on the full moon.

Or failing that, just eat a steak.
Randisi

Social climber
Dalian, Liaoning
Dec 15, 2013 - 10:48am PT
Someone cue Donovan!
Fritz

Trad climber
Choss Creek, ID
Dec 15, 2013 - 10:48am PT
I remember something big was going to happen near Sedona a few years back.

Was it a Harmonic Convergence--------or a Moronic Disturbance???

Come to Choss Creek Jim. We'll feed you a little "Nerve-Tonic", then Harley will lay on paws, cleanly remove your astral goiter, and we will bury it down by the spring creek.

Credit: Fritz

Harley running towards the spring creek with astral-goiter.
Harley running towards the spring creek with astral-goiter.
Credit: Fritz
philo

Trad climber
Is that light the end of the tunnel or a train?
Dec 15, 2013 - 10:54am PT
Was it a Harmonic Convergence--------or a Moronic Disturbance

No Fritz it was a harmonica convention.
Dingus Milktoast

Gym climber
U.N. Ambassador, Crackistan
Dec 15, 2013 - 11:07am PT
Ass-trail goiters are some serious shit!


Nawmsayin?

DMT
Ron Anderson

Trad climber
Relic MilkEye and grandpoobah of HBRKRNH
Dec 15, 2013 - 12:50pm PT
JD nothing will work for that goiter cept removal by a qualified taxidermist, that can also make an attractive wall mount trophy of that bad boy. Or a small coin purse..;-)
rottingjohnny

Sport climber
mammoth lakes ca
Dec 15, 2013 - 01:03pm PT
Less negative male energy might help...?
Edge

Trad climber
Boulder, CO
Dec 15, 2013 - 01:11pm PT
You can always try self treatment with Pacifican Healing.

1. Smudge your innards with Humboldt counties finest.
2. Sprinkle ashes from Mt St Helens around you in a counterclockwise sacred circle.
3. Flog the affected area with seaweed.

Most people find suitable results after Step 1.
Bruce Kay

Gym climber
BC
Dec 15, 2013 - 01:14pm PT
astral-goiter.

typo fritz. thats Astro goiter

(the dick wrenching mega classic of choss creek iduh- ho)
McHale's Navy

Trad climber
From Panorama City, CA
Dec 15, 2013 - 01:21pm PT
Jim, in that video Tore said if you are already experiencing perfection you got nothing to worry about. So, that goiter probably belongs to somebody else. You could get a second opinion at Mt. Shasta though.
mouse from merced

Trad climber
The finger of fate, my friends, is fickle.
Dec 15, 2013 - 01:43pm PT
Baffin Bay healing: Perform the hempen ritual as above. Then jump in naked, come out a block of ice, have the crew crush you and slush you and drink you down, piss you back into the Bay, spend a long time evaporating, then come back and land in Californy, "the place ya ouhta be," whole and pure and goiter-free.

It's costly and there's no guarantee you'll end up even over land, but it's New Age and people might even begin to think you ARE Roman.

I'd go for the invite from Wayno, myself.

We need some Donini Rain! Any rain will do, but you might get to fall on some great routes. You could at least RUN down the Nose In A Day.

Great balls of fire, Dyngus Mylktoasted, put that one up over on the Flames!
Reilly

Mountain climber
The Other Monrovia- CA
Dec 15, 2013 - 01:49pm PT
Are we seeing the Second Coming of Juan de Fuca? Hallelujah!!!!!!!!!!!!
mouse from merced

Trad climber
The finger of fate, my friends, is fickle.
Dec 15, 2013 - 02:34pm PT
AT LAST THE TRUTH!
Flipper reveals: Eeeep! Eeep! Eeeeeeep-eep!
Turns out it was Charles Atlas' empire.
http://www.hulu.com/watch/536801
Kickin' sand in the face of REAL history.

Who in the hell is Rhonda Fuca?

Wouldn't it be cool to come down as a raindrop on the nose of a Gibraltar Ape? One who could climb & keep up with Jim, goiter or no?

Wayno

Big Wall climber
Seattle, WA
Dec 15, 2013 - 03:02pm PT
Experience the Light that is your birthright.

That's all you need to do.

It is the "how" that stops most people.

Works for astral goiters, too!
Fritz

Trad climber
Choss Creek, ID
Dec 15, 2013 - 03:54pm PT
I have memories of Donini being fascinated by goiters on the locals, on that long ago journey into Lakok 1, for his most-supreme sufferfest.


Undoubtedly Donini was afflicted psychically by the experience, and has carried an astral-goiter to this day.

This book would likely explain more:

Drifting continents and endemic goitre in northern Pakistan.
A G Stewart

Aman Clinic, Khapalu, Baltistan, Pakistan.
BMJ (Impact Factor: 14.09). 07/1990; 300(6738):1507-12.
Source: PubMed

ABSTRACT Although Baltistan, north east Pakistan, is in a region of iodine deficiency disorders, the distribution of goitre within the district, according to age and sex, has not been clearly defined.


The Brits spell goiter, goitre, likely due to their attempting to impress Americans with their couthness.
mouse from merced

Trad climber
The finger of fate, my friends, is fickle.
Dec 15, 2013 - 06:01pm PT
Hey, Fritz, are you snowed in, or what?

How long did it take you to noodle up that goitre rap?

My mom's cousin Connie had a mini-goiter and she lived in Sun Valley most of her adult life.

Now she's moved to Sedona.

Still has it.

Still bakes mean bread the way Jim climbs.

Her heavy organic grain loaves make great milk toast, even with no milk, in the Scottish fashion.
The secret is crunch.  Toast one side like you want it exterminated an...
The secret is crunch. Toast one side like you want it exterminated and the other not so much. Use the oven broiler like a man, not a Martha wannabe. But use an apron so you don't get yoghurt on your camera. Celery, M&Ms, your choice.
Credit: mouse from merced
And don't forget the salted soy nuts in the yoghurt, neither.

Garnish with nuts, but not used hardware. This is clean dining at the extreme.

Beverage of the day, consomme with onion.

By the way, I'm not close to snowed in--the Rev had ten inches at Greeley Hill--but have a cold which needs coddling and staying inside.

The old softie knows when to kwit.

Besides, I threw the left-over nuts, coated with light cream, which I used in place of milk, on to the roof of the building next door, seeking the cat known as Roofus.

Bored in a good way.

Merry Christmas, Grossmans and Wayno!

Great enduro-climb food, guaranteed to be free of weird molds in the flour, for the most part.

Fritz

Trad climber
Choss Creek, ID
Dec 15, 2013 - 06:10pm PT
Mouse: Re your question,
Hey, Fritz, are you snowed in, or what?

How long did it take you to noodle up that goitre rap?

It's working in sales for the last 42 years. I've always enjoyed coming up with jest what folks want to hear. If they were amused enough, they usually bought something.

(But I do remember either Donini or John Roskelly, or both: showing slides of males in Skardu with huge goitres.)
go-B

climber
Hebrews 1:3
Dec 15, 2013 - 06:22pm PT
photo not found
Missing photo ID#335322

All things as old as Redwoods get Burls or goiters!
donini

Trad climber
Ouray, Colorado
Topic Author's Reply - Dec 15, 2013 - 06:42pm PT
MfM....tasty looking dish....goiter be gone.

Jest so you don't think that your memory is failing Fritz....yes, i told you about goiters in the Karakorum. Saw a dwarf with a huge one in the very weird village of Chocteau (sp?), memorable image. Seems they sequestered all the misfits there....might be a good place for the regulars on ST to get hooked up.

MH2

climber
Dec 15, 2013 - 07:57pm PT
"I've got so many healers it's making me sick."

Utah Phillips
Sedona
Reilly

Mountain climber
The Other Monrovia- CA
Dec 15, 2013 - 08:01pm PT
So what's next, "What's the best comb-over for cracks?"
i'm gumby dammit

Sport climber
da ow
Dec 15, 2013 - 08:16pm PT
The god of Atlantis is Poseidon. His symbol is a bull. You will be best served by sacrificing a bull and pouring the blood into the ocean at midnight on the full moon.

Or failing that, just eat a steak.
Are you trying to kill him?!
go-B

climber
Hebrews 1:3
Dec 15, 2013 - 08:18pm PT
photo not found
Missing photo ID#335335
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