Ever Dated a Climber?

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moosedrool

Trad climber
lost, far away from Poland
Topic Author's Original Post - Apr 4, 2013 - 12:48pm PT
Bad idea!

I never knew any climbing girls before I got married, but my daughter dated a climber one once. She is a climber too. She is worried ;)


Chris Weidner: Top 10 reasons why you shouldn't date a climber
By Chris Weidner, For the Camera

Springtime seems confused this year, as if it's not quite ready to live up to its rep as the season of warmth and romance.

If you're as confused as the spring, then heed these words of caution before exposing your heart to that cruel yet irresistible miasma of hope and rejection, comfort and pain, longing and regret (i.e. dating):

Beware of dating a climber.

This strangely seductive species lurks everywhere in Boulder (fortunately, they're easy to spot. Note the hunched shoulders, over-developed lats and gnarly looking hands with twisted knuckles and desiccated skin). Here are the top five reasons why you shouldn't date a climber guy or a climber girl.

Climber dudes are bad dates because:

1) Like all guys, they have a one-track mind, and it's honed in on their next climb -- not on you. "Everything depends on the weather," said one frustrated, date-starved woman with a climber dude. "They'll flake out on dates whenever conditions are good."

2) If their one-track mind does turn to you, well, rest assured they're zeroed in on the S-word (rhymes with "flex" -- the only other thing they do). No surprise, really. But the problem is, they're constantly distracted by uber-lean and fit, scantily clad hotties at the climbing gym. Sadly, many women can't handle that kind of threat. Can you? (As if any climber dudes are a fraction as hot as you are).

3) Nationwide, the average climber dude is a filthy caveman who avoids a real job at all costs. In Boulder, the average climber dude has a condo and a Ph.D. -- but he's still a filthy caveman without a real job.

4) Climber dudes freak out over their weight like teenage girls, especially before an important climb. One fit, local climber girl admitted that her ex-boyfriend was so obsessed that he snuck into her closet. "The minute I saw him wearing my designer skinny jeans -- and they fit! (her emphasis) ... (pause for tears) ... I knew our relationship was over."

5) It's all about them, ALL THE TIME.

Now, I can't deny the allure of asking a climber girl out -- believe me, I know it's tempting. But here's why climber chicks make bad dates:

1) If you're a climber, she's already dated your friends. What can I say? It's a small community.

2) Climber girls think every dude should look like the uber-lean and fit, shirtless men they're surrounded by at the climbing gym. Problem is, the girls can get away with it! See that long line of lonely lurkers right behind you? They're waiting for her to wise up and dump you.

3) Girls employ technique and style when they climb rather than brute strength. There's a good chance she'll outperform you on the rock, in front of all your friends. Can you handle that, Caveman?

4) "They're all psycho," in the words of one fed-up local who swore off climber girls for eternity.

5) If you're the jealous type, forget about dating a climber chick. You love it when she sports that tight, skimpy Spandex while working up a hot sweat. But dude, she does the same thing when you're not around, in front of all the other guys. A few of them, BTW, are hotter, stronger, smarter and richer than you are.

http://www.dailycamera.com/recreation-columnists/ci_22877311/chris-weidner-top-10-reasons-why-you-shouldnt
Roots

Mountain climber
SoCal
Apr 4, 2013 - 01:14pm PT
ha - just my wife and after reading that I'm glad we started (climbing) together..
Ward Trotter

Trad climber
Apr 4, 2013 - 01:19pm PT
Ever Dated a Climber?

Really bad pick-up line.
Brandon-

climber
The Granite State.
Apr 4, 2013 - 01:23pm PT
Yeah. She climbed way harder than me. Like .11 trad when I was just learning to place gear. It lasted for a while, but obviously didn't work out. Now I see her boyfriend in the climbing magazines from time to time.
Seamstress

Trad climber
Yacolt, WA
Apr 4, 2013 - 01:28pm PT
DAted a few. Married one - 21 years and still counting. He will give me away to other partners for climbs he doesn't want to do and be waiting at the top/bottom with refreshments. What's not to love about that?
stich

Trad climber
Colorado Springs, Colorado
Apr 4, 2013 - 01:28pm PT
It's not climbers per se, it's climbing guides you want to avoid dating.



So...

What's the difference between a climbing guide and a large pizza?
Spanky

Social climber
boulder co
Apr 4, 2013 - 01:33pm PT
A large pizza can feed a family! ha

I dated a climber once. She was a pretty strong leader(9's and 10-) but she would only try harder pitches that suited her style like finger and thin hand cracks. Anything that was awkward or runout was always my pitch and she complained when I had to work for them but loved to toot her horn about the thin hand cracks she styled (she had tiny hands) It was also hard to watch her on the sharp end because it made me worry. My wife climbs with me now but she doesn't lead and we just do mellow stuff so its always fun.
Reilly

Mountain climber
The Other Monrovia- CA
Apr 4, 2013 - 01:41pm PT
'Dated' is a double entendre around here.
Big Mike

Trad climber
BC
Apr 4, 2013 - 01:49pm PT
Yup. She made me who i am, and then dumped me when i was hurt for some other guide type who had a snowmobile.

Now i'm training one who is perpetually scared and wonders why no one calls her to go climbing... Then complains about it while i'm in rehab... Sigh..
moosedrool

Trad climber
lost, far away from Poland
Topic Author's Reply - Apr 4, 2013 - 01:49pm PT
"entendre"???

No cursing on ST Reilly!
moosedrool

Trad climber
lost, far away from Poland
Topic Author's Reply - Apr 4, 2013 - 02:03pm PT
I married a girl that was afraid of everything. I was fun teaching her swimming, snorkeling, kayaking, skiing, and even going on a roller coaster. She overcame her many fears and became a quite adventurous person. She is my heroine because it is easy to do something you don't fear, but to be afraid and do it anyway, it takes guts! (Climbing is a bit too much for her, but she got up the cables on Half Dome :)

GhoulweJ

Trad climber
El Dorado Hills, CA
Apr 4, 2013 - 02:10pm PT
I've been dating a non-climber... I can report that dating a non-climber doesn't work.



stich

Trad climber
Colorado Springs, Colorado
Apr 4, 2013 - 02:30pm PT
I still climb with the girl I briefly dated. She leads sport and with some encouragement I hope to get her leading on gear. Everyone should be well rounded, aye? Ah, mixing climbing with romance is pretty intoxicating. I loved our first road trip together.
HF

climber
I'm a Norwegian stuck in Joshua Tree
Apr 4, 2013 - 02:33pm PT
I married him. Does that count?
moosedrool

Trad climber
lost, far away from Poland
Topic Author's Reply - Apr 4, 2013 - 02:58pm PT
I married him. Does that count?

Why doesn't he rescue you from that Joshua Tree then?

;)
Jaybro

Social climber
Wolf City, Wyoming
Apr 4, 2013 - 02:59pm PT
What is dating?
10b4me

Ice climber
Happy Boulders
Apr 4, 2013 - 03:11pm PT

Now i'm training one who is perpetually scared and wonders why no one calls her to go climbing... Then complains about it while i'm in rehab... Sigh..

Big Mike, I take it she's not on Supertopo
Tami

Social climber
Canada
Apr 4, 2013 - 03:14pm PT
What is dating?

Chasing sheep.
Fat Dad

Trad climber
Los Angeles, CA
Apr 4, 2013 - 03:34pm PT
The only one I dated I married, which, after kids, pretty much put the skids on climbing for both of us, her willingly, me very, very grudgingly. I actually had a much easier time going climbing when I dated non-climbers. Looking at other climber friends who married non-climbers, they seem to enjoy the same benefit.
ontheedgeandscaredtodeath

Social climber
SLO, Ca
Apr 4, 2013 - 03:36pm PT
It has its ups and downs.
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