f*#k rock climbing. f*#k rock climbers. f*#k all y'all with your stupid beards and your puffy coats and your trucker caps and your snobby condecending f*#king attitudes. f*#k you and your stupid attention-whorey blogs and your numberchasing and your shallow idea of friendship. newsflash: i don't climb anymore. go find some other sap to belay-bitch you on your chossy project. don't hear from some dipshit for two years and all of a sudden you're my best buddy cuz you don't have a partner for your sierra trip. sorry all your other preferred partners said no and you had to scrape the bottom of the barrel. get my shifts covered at work, pack up the truck, get ready..."oh hey bro, gotta cancel cuz i'm getting married!" f*#k you i hope you get divorced you fairweather friend. thank god for singletracks and full suspension bikes so i can just load up the bike and the dog and don't have to sweat the flakefest anymore or hang out with cheap boring d-bags who think being a climber makes them special. also, dh mountain biking is way more dangerous than climbing so get over yourselves.
My neighbors' freakin' frackin' dogs that bark all the freakin' frackin' time SUCK! ANd by association, so do their owners! Suck. SUCK. SUCK!! I fantasize about going over there with my .22 pistol--pop! pop! pop!--all's quiet on the western front.