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Edge
Trad climber
New Durham, NH
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Topic Author's Original Post - Jan 8, 2013 - 07:05pm PT
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Go ahead, share 'em if you got 'em.
1) Yesterday I went for my first annual physical in two years; I guess that makes it a biannual physical. After the preliminary height, weight, blood pressure, and history foreplay, the doc gives me a johnnie and tells me to strip down to my underwear and put it on. She excuses herself from the room to give me some privacy whilst I change. Now this is probably a good time to mention that my new doc is 15 years my junior, long golden hair, and drop dead gorgeous, so I'll gladly go anything she asks.
She re-enters the exam room after 45 seconds, has me drop my drawers to the floor, pulls aside the robe, and gives a thorough, two handed inspection of the region commonly under my belay loop had I been wearing a harness, which of course I was not at the time. Just about the time I am thinking she owes me some flowers and a box of chocolates, I get spun around and my prostate gets a probing that would make an alien abductor blush. I pass everything with flying colors, and in many ways its hard to hide my excitement.
So, first of all, if I passed the prostrate exam, does that make me a perfect a$$hole?
And second, given the nature of the impending exam, did she really need to leave the room so I could disrobe?
2) My 21 yo son has a girl "friend" home for the last 36 hours. Despite the fact I am home all day, I have seen the pleasant enough lass for a total of maybe 50 minutes. Sunday night I heard the two of them come into the house at 2:30 am, and the next time they leave his room is at 4 pm when they got dressed to go catch a sunset (it was cloudy, but they didn't know that) so that they could say they accomplished something that day.
Is this normally how one entertains "just a friend?" I guess I must have missed that class while off climbing.
3) And when did airline snacks start costing $8 for a box of assorted vacuum sealed pockets of air with maybe 20 cents worth of "savory" fiberboard?
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Norwegian
Trad climber
Placerville, California
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f*#kin republicans.
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Brandon-
climber
The Granite State.
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It's too cold to be working a chop and table saw outside all day this time of year.
Atlas gloves on, poor pencil marks for cuts. Gloves off, fingers freeze.
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SicMic
climber
two miles from Eldorado
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I won't comment on what seems very obvious. But if the kid asks you to buy condoms, try to stay out of the house after you deliver them.
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happiegrrrl
Trad climber
www.climbaddictdesigns.com
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I pass everything with flying colors, and in many ways its hard to hide my excrement.
Too much information! (hahah)
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Ghost
climber
A long way from where I started
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And second, given the nature of the impending exam, did she really need to leave the room so I could disrobe?
It's not a modesty thing. The switch to turn all the cameras on is in her office, not in the examination room.
2) Is this normally how one entertains "just a friend?"
Sounds like a pretty good idea to me.
3) And when did airline snacks start costing $8 for a box of assorted vacuum sealed pockets of air with maybe 20 cents worth of "savory" fiberboard?
Is that what they do in the back end of the airplane? Are you saying your climbing shoe sponsor and energy bar sponsors make you fly in Economy?
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Da_Dweeb
climber
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For sale, one pair of baby shoes, never worn.
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healyje
Trad climber
Portland, Oregon
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Is this normally how one entertains "just a friend?"
Well, it is NH so it depends, were either one of them wearing plaid?
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Rolfr
Social climber
North Vancouver BC
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I also have a female Doc. I asked her for a second opinion on my prostate exam, she inserted a second finger. Badda Bing!
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MisterE
Social climber
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The Tiny Little Rant Thread
Meh.
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okie
Trad climber
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Did you study for your prostrate exam? Were you...um...prepared for it?
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justthemaid
climber
Jim Henson's Basement
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F*#king History channel. Since when are "ancient aliens" "history"? My wellspring of useless but fascinating historical trivia has been completely obliterated by fat pawn guys.
PS: @OP At least you were probed by a hottie. Coulda been much worse.
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TwistedCrank
climber
Dingleberry Gulch, Ideeho
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I blame society.
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tinker b
climber
the commonwealth
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i wish that people would always let short people in front of them at live music. everyone would be able to see if we were all shortest to tallest.
and how many f-ing pictures do people need to take, don't people realize that holding their camera in the air taking a hundred drunken pictures is annoying.
and drunk women should not be allowed to wear spikes on the dance floor
thanks for giving me a little rant space
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MisterE
Social climber
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Dr.F: Edge
You need to graduate to full on rant level
Go ahead, let it all out..
Yes, because that is such a pillar of informational wealth on this forum.
What a joke.
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Da_Dweeb
climber
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I shall present a rant in haiku.
Climbers love poop jokes,
but climbers don't like ponies.
Perhaps pony poop?
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WBraun
climber
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Ya don't need any chemtrails.
They're already stupid ......
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MisterE
Social climber
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Like a duck smoking a cigarette stupid?
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Josh Nash
Social climber
riverbank ca
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Teeny Tiny first world rant
1) So sick of the gun debate and how these same "constitutionalists" say nothing about how other civil liberties are really being seriously eroded away far more so than the right to bear arms.
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survival
Big Wall climber
Terrapin Station
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2013, no flying cars, NO FLYING CARS!!!! GRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRR!!!!
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