My Daddy


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Topic Author's Original Post - Jun 1, 2012 - 12:27pm PT
My Dad's memorial is tomorrow.

Painting by Neebee of Costa Frangos holding his grandson, Aristides Jo...
Painting by Neebee of Costa Frangos holding his grandson, Aristides Jordan Sherman
Credit: Neebee (Greatest Painter EVER)

Dad was a great man. He smuggled weapons during Work War II through German lines when he was only a kid. He went to work at 14 to support his family. Joined the merchant marines at 15 after lying about his age. Left Greece, traveled the world and lead a rebellion on his last ship because of dangerous working conditions including being fed spoiled food. Forced the ship to port in the U.S. and helped the port authorities build a case against his Captain. Since his Captain reported him as a Communist to Greece in retaliation and my Dad was facing at least ten years in jail when he returned to Greece, (it was in the 1950's) he jumped ship.

He then worked construction. Ended up being the foreman despite being young, not speaking the language correctly, etc. Dad then worked on sky risers as a painter. When his uncle fell to his death on one of their jobs, he moved west. He settled in California and had many more adventures. One of them was being a security guard at UCSB when some hippies went to burn down the recruiting office. (It was during the Vietnam Conflict.) Dad faced them off, told them they had to wait until he was not on duty. As long as he was working, nothing was going to get damaged. The group left him alone and did it after his shift.

He then went to Greece after receiving his American Citizenship which gave him immunity from his old Captain's charges, he met my mom, married her and had two kids. He then was very busy being a very faithful and dependable husband. He took care of my Mom after she got sick, never thought of doing anything else despite other women always hitting on him. Even when my mom was bed ridden, he stood by her side. Plus my mom never had a bed sore despite being trapped in that bed for over five years. Dad took care of her that well. During that time he sent both of us to college, taught me my physics despite having a fourth grade education himself. Yes, he was that smart. (His schooling was interrupted by the Germans, I always wondered who he would have been if he had a chance to be educated.)

I am so going to miss him.

RIP Costadino Petros Frangos

When God made you, he made greatness. I am so lucky to have been raised by you. I will see you on the other side. Please give mom a kiss, hug Lass, and let everyone know I have not forgotten them.

Sending LOVE, Anastasia


Big Wall climber
Terrapin Station
Jun 1, 2012 - 12:30pm PT
Wow. That is so awesome Anastasia.

What a beautiful and loving tribute. And thanks to Neebee for a beautiful painting!

Your Daddy is proud of you too, I'm certain.

Sport climber
Boulder, Colorado!
Jun 1, 2012 - 12:35pm PT
Thanks for sharing Anastasia. He was a wonderful man who lives on through your and your baby.

Trad climber
Jun 1, 2012 - 12:38pm PT
Jon Beck

Trad climber
Jun 1, 2012 - 12:38pm PT
Thanks for sharing your story, very inspiring. Your father was a great man.

edit: complements on the picture too, I thought it was a photo it was so good!

Trad climber
Jun 1, 2012 - 12:38pm PT
This is what I call KEEPING THE MAGIC ALIVE!


The Granite State.
Jun 1, 2012 - 12:39pm PT
Thanks for sharing that. Your Dad seems like a great man.

My Grandfathers memorial is tomorrow too.

Positive thoughts beamed your way.


When God made you, he made greatness. I am so lucky to have been raised by you. I will see you on the other side. Please give mom a kiss, hug Lass, and let everyone know I have not forgotten them.

That brought a tear to my eye.

Trad climber
Ouray, Colorado
Jun 1, 2012 - 12:41pm PT
Wonderful tribute Anastasia, I'm sure you added a lot of happiness to his life.

Topic Author's Reply - Jun 1, 2012 - 01:13pm PT
Thanks folks... I am trying, but I am not even close to living life as well as my Dad. Luckily... Well, let me say it this way... The main reason Dad liked Bill is because they had very similar traits. (I married my Dad.) They enjoyed their time together like two best friends. Dad even said Bill was "The Son." It was a very good mix.

The last few months of my Dad's life, Bill was taking care of him because they enjoyed their time together. It was a good end, despite my feelings of great loss... Dad left this life with dignity and grace.

Thanks Bill for making good things happen, enabling my Dad to see his grandson, allowing Dad to die at home and taking care of me so I am not a big mess.

Now it's Aristides time to shine. The kid sure as heck has some big shoes to fill.


Trad climber
Fresno CA
Jun 1, 2012 - 01:44pm PT
Sorry to hear of your loss of him. Last Sunday was the 35th anniversary of my father's death, and I still miss him, even though I remember him with happiness.

I'm glad your father got to see Aristides. I'm sure the two gave each other great joy.

Our thoughts and prayers are with you and your family.


Trad climber
East Coast US
Jun 1, 2012 - 02:17pm PT
Very sorry for your loss. I hope my kids love me that much.
Dingus Milktoast

Gym climber
And every fool knows, a dog needs a home, and...
Jun 1, 2012 - 02:28pm PT
Anastasia I know the pain and pride you must be experiencing. Thanks for sharing this.


Trad climber
New and Bionic too!
Jun 1, 2012 - 02:35pm PT
You have very reason to be proud. Your father lived a full life with many accomplishments. His love for family and country is evident. Celebrate that life and let your love for him last forever.
I only regret that I did not get the chance to meet him.

Somewhere out there
Jun 1, 2012 - 02:45pm PT

It's inspirational for me to hear this talk of your father and his travels.

I am glad that his life led to you coming into being.

My condolences,


Trad climber
Fumbling towards stone
Jun 1, 2012 - 03:51pm PT
Gosh, as I was reading this, I was thinking the whole time what eKat naturally noted above: keeping the magic alive. You dad certainly did that and now it is your turn to really take this on fully. You're already doing this and have been doing it for quite a while, so I don't think it's ever going to be a challenge! The difference is that now you begin to be the one people turn to for support and learning (maybe whether they like it or not! Ha ha!

Perhaps you think you're not even close to living as well as he did, but I think your kid(s) will be the best judge of that, just as you have been for your dad.

This reminds me of a snippet from my all time favorite story (a story that has guided me for almost 35 years now): The Odyssey. I wrote this a decade and half ago in a tale of my own father (modified slightly):

An oracle told Odysseus that once he got home, he needed to take an oar (the symbol of his twenty year journey home and of his struggle) and to walk inland until he reached a place where the people no longer knew what the oar was. There he was to plant it in the earth and teach those people about the oar, about the sea, about the rowing and striving towards home. And he did just that into his old age.

This is about keeping the magic alive. Thank you for sharing your dad's beautiful story and all that he gave and loved. And thank you for being part of his lineage. It is comforting and inspiring to know that.

Peace, love and hugs to you and your beautiful family.


Edit: And what a beautiful gift from Neebee... She has riches some of us will be lucky to ever know.

Trad climber
Yacolt, WA
Jun 1, 2012 - 04:13pm PT

What to say - you said it all. I am sure he knows how much you adore him.


Social climber
Missoula MT
Jun 1, 2012 - 04:25pm PT
Thank you for sharing with us your tribute to a great man..

Best wishes to Aristides, Bill & yourself from Montana


The Granite State.
Jun 1, 2012 - 04:27pm PT
Fletcher, you are one good dude.

Keep on keeping on brother.

Trad climber
Jun 1, 2012 - 04:28pm PT
Hey Anastasia,

Thank you for sharing the amazing stories of your dad, and family, too. The painting is beautiful and I also thought it was a photo. Sharing stories keeps us all connected and reminds us to be grateful, especially for wonderful, loving memories.

My heart goes out to you and your family.
Double D

Jun 1, 2012 - 04:30pm PT
What a beautiful legacy he left behind in you and your family. Thanks for sharing Anastasia.
mouse from merced

Trad climber
merced, california
Jun 1, 2012 - 05:08pm PT
Anastasia, my condolence for the loss of your father, who is one of a kind.
God may be inscrutable, but She is better that way! You are fortunate in that Costadino was such a good teacher. I wish you well in the dim days ahead, but there is always hope for Resurrection. God bless you and yours.

For those who don't know it, Anastasia~resurrection.
Odysseus~walker, even though he was a sailor like his Roman counterpart, Ulysses~full of wrath. Take a long look at what names we give to those we will be loving for the rest of time. Costadino did, as "best" as I can "figure."

[Fletcher, move to the front "row" for that story.]


Trad climber
Elk Creek, Idaho
Jun 1, 2012 - 06:35pm PT
Very stirring and heartfelt eulogy, Anastasia. May memories of your parents lighten life's burdens until you lock arms with them once again.

Trad climber
Living Outside the Statist Quo
Jun 1, 2012 - 07:24pm PT
Well said Anastasia...

What a life, family is precious and our thanks for sharing just a peek into this wounderful life.

Will & Jules

Social climber
somewhere that doesnt have anything over 90'
Jun 1, 2012 - 07:52pm PT
Your Dad was a wonderful man, it sounds like he touched alot of lives.
Timid TopRope

Social climber
'used to be Paradise, CA
Jun 1, 2012 - 07:56pm PT
Great tribute to your father's life and memory. Comforting that he was able to die in his own home (like my mom) and away from the hospital. Hard to pull off in this day and age.

Your father drank deeply.

Andy Tomaselli

PS Equally excellent neebee original tribute. That definitely came from the heart.

Social climber
Jun 1, 2012 - 07:56pm PT
hey there say, anastasia.... oh my, after hearing his life story, i feel like crying all over again... i got to feel close to him, when i painted him, and by reflecting on the small stories i had heard you mention from the homefront...

oh my, i would wish i had known all this when i painted him, but now that i think of it--GOD KNEW...
who WOULD have ever thought that i'd PAINT the OCEAN all around him, :O
that sure WAS a match, :O
now i am really in awe of how god works, :O

and more 'in awe':
for this too--that you found someone so close to your dad, and that he and bill were so close... and adding this: god's grace in your dad's life, as he prepared to die... a gentle place to do so, after his gallant work with your mom through her health-loss into death...

i DO remember the love he had for your mother... :)
and i remember how we all prayed that he'd live to see your baby son!

wow, your dad was really SOMETHING, anastasia...

a man who knew how to be what he should be in life--and sought to make
sure that others got treated honorably, too....

it was a lot harder in the old-days that he saw, as well many of
our parent-folks know...

love and god bless to you all, at this memorial time...
i am so very glad for that soft-gentle-nudge in my heart to paint
this honorable: man, relative to his family, husband, father, father-in-law, and grampa...

i will treasure this story that you shared...

Social climber
Moorpark, CA.
Jun 1, 2012 - 08:03pm PT
Sincere condolences to you and your family.

Anna, thank you for sharing your fathers story.


Social climber
Jun 2, 2012 - 02:27am PT
hey there say, anastasia...

not sure if this link works... from the supertopo...
it is the link of when your mom passed away...

i did not want want to bump the thread, as that is something
for you to think about only... but, what i wanted to do was this:

put the link...
the reason was, i loved seeing that picture of how much
love showed in your dad's face, as he SAT by your mom...

i thought you might like to see that, when you get back here to
read this thread, after the memorial..

here is the link:

the name of the thread is:
passing on, if you need to find it, later...

you dad's love shows like a glowing beacon, and the love of
your mom shows back to him....

it is good to know that they are together now...
love and god bless so very much...


Social climber
chica de chico, I don't claim to be a daisy.
Jun 2, 2012 - 02:31am PT
Miss Anna, Beautiful tribute....

Peace & love


Big Wall climber
Seattle, WA
Jun 2, 2012 - 03:33am PT
A nice soulful tribute for a daughter's Father.

I lost my own Father almost twenty years ago and rarely a day goes by that I don't appreciate his wisdom and sacrifice.
Patrick Sawyer

Originally California now Ireland
Jun 2, 2012 - 05:52am PT
Very nice Anastasia. Sounds like he a had a colorful and full life. Condolences and may he rest in peace.

Trad climber
Top of the Mountain Mun
Jun 2, 2012 - 11:12am PT
Touched, moved and inspired by your Father Anastasia. Thanks.

Trad climber
Millbrae, CA
Jun 2, 2012 - 11:18am PT
I was very touched by your straight from the heart tribute to your Father.
Warmest wishes to you and your family.

Social climber
Jun 2, 2012 - 11:19am PT
What a great story !!!! Thanks for sharing it & the painting. All the best to you & your family both here and in the beyond.

Jim Henson's Basement
Jun 2, 2012 - 11:23am PT
It is a wonderful story. He had a fascinating life. Thank you so much for sharing it and I'm so sorry your dad is gone.

Give the hubby and the little guy a hug for me. Give yourself a big one while you are at it as well.


Ice climber
mercenario de merced
Jun 2, 2012 - 11:25am PT
Alot of the time when I don't know what to say, i just listen:

This has been heard more than a few times

"I don't know what happens when people die
Can't seem to grasp it as hard as I try
It's like a song I can hear playing right in my ear
That I can't sing
I can't help listening
And I can't help feeling stupid standing around
Crying as they ease you down
'cause I know that you'd rather we were dancing
Dancing our sorrow away
(right on dancing)
No matter what fate chooses to play
(there's nothing you can do about it anyway)"

Mighty Hiker

Vancouver, B.C.
Jun 2, 2012 - 11:35am PT
Thanks, Anastasia - very moving. I hope that Aristides takes after his granddaddy, a little bit.

Trad climber
Santa Cruz
Jun 2, 2012 - 11:39am PT
Can't talk...can barely type.


Social climber
Jun 2, 2012 - 11:45am PT
My condolences to your family.

Hard to measure up to someone of that generation; it was a different world. Don't try to. From what I read from your posts, you are certainly following in his footsteps.

Trad climber
Jun 2, 2012 - 01:53pm PT
Your dad sounds like he was a great man and a great person.

Trad climber
washington indiana
Jun 2, 2012 - 02:10pm PT
What a beautiful tribute.

Trad climber
New Durham, NH
Jun 2, 2012 - 02:20pm PT
What a beautiful life, Anastasia.

My heartfelt sympathies to you and your family.

Topic Author's Reply - Jun 4, 2012 - 01:43am PT
I don't need to know a family to be aware of how great the love is. It's always there beyond any b.s. etc. It exist even beyond a person's life. That is the all powerful bond between children and parents. Sometimes it is not well expressed, it sure is always felt.

Now I am still waiting for my Dad to walk through the door, make me haul in the groceries, clean up, etc. I can still smell him in the house. Yet I know he is gone and with it (since my mother died two years ago,) my ability to come back to the family that raised me. I am going to take a while to adjust. Even though I've known loss, this one isn't easier. All I know is it will take time and some weird reactions.

Here's to my Daddy and Mom.

Mom and Dad. :)
Mom and Dad. :)
Credit: Anastasia

Dad playing with us in the mountains.
Dad playing with us in the mountains.
Credit: Anastasia

Tripping in Zion. :)
Tripping in Zion. :)
Credit: Anastasia

Trad climber
Elk Creek, Idaho
Jun 4, 2012 - 02:01am PT
Very handsome and kindly looking couple.

Social climber
flagstaff arizona
Jun 4, 2012 - 02:18am PT
Damn, Anastasia. Ths is a guy I would have really, really loved to meet.

Jun 4, 2012 - 05:58am PT
I was going to say the same as bvb, you don't meet people like that every day.
Patrick Sawyer

Originally California now Ireland
Jun 4, 2012 - 06:33am PT
Anastasia, great photos. Warm memories for you, I know you will keep them in your heart. Best Wishes


Trad climber
June Lake, California....via the Damascus Road
Jun 4, 2012 - 10:05am PT
"It was a good end, despite my feelings of great loss... Dad left this life with dignity and grace."

Anastasia, first of all, my condolences on the loss of your father....may he rest in peace, and may you and your family find solace in his memory.

Your description of him in your OP had me in tears, as I believe your Dad lived the ultimate 'man's man' kinda life. He rose up against adversity, faced it with dignity, and did not shirk responsibility despite much difficulty.

To me, that is the epitome of what it is to be a man, and your words that I posted above sum it up perfectly.....something I call "finishing strong".

It sounds as if your Dad did that in every sense of the word, and for that, he has my deepest respect. I aspire to follow in that form.

With apologies to Mark Hudon and his live reporting from El Cap, this thread is now the best thing going here at ST.

Thanks for sharing your heart with us, Anastasia....and the very best to you and your family.


Tony Bird

Northridge, CA
Jun 4, 2012 - 12:09pm PT
ah, i see--your parents were both greek movie stars.

wonderful thread, anastasia. my parents came out of the same conflict, but i'm afraid they weren't quite as "together". a well-lived life is the best we can ask for, to look back at, to leave as memories for those we've touched.

somehow, i think i was greek in a previous life. always loved greek music, and recently developed much interest in the great song opus of mikis theodorakis, reviving enough of my knowledge of the language to appreciate the songwriting and greek poetry which he set to song. such a struggle the greeks have had, but so often they've done well with it. gia sou for your dad.

and neebee's portrait--wow!

Trad climber
Fumbling towards stone
Jun 4, 2012 - 12:22pm PT
Love the new photos. They speak much.

Now I am still waiting for my Dad to walk through the door, make me haul in the groceries, clean up, etc. I can still smell him in the house.

Know this feeling well. My father-in-law passed on six years ago and there are times when I do certain things, or see my kids, his family or my wife doing stuff and it makes me stop and think, "Damn, Hank's here!" That presence can make us feel sad still at times, since we really miss him and I don't think that will ever end. But more and more, I find these little moments uplifting; they put a smile on my face.

Big hugs,

Topic Author's Reply - May 18, 2013 - 04:45pm PT
Here is to a year of missing you a whole lot Dad.

I think it's a bit worse since after losing my Mom, I at least still had him. Now that he is gone, yeah... It's a very different world without one's parents.

I know many of you understand, have been through it too. It's weird, eh?

Social climber
the Wastelands
May 18, 2013 - 05:34pm PT
I think I know how you feel

I lost my father 16 years ago and my mother at 97 this past September

you and I are orphans now!

every single day I think of my mom and dad, what they said and how they lived

like your folks they were from the Greatest Generation

we honor them by living as they lived, with empathy and compassion for all living things

I can tell from your words that they were very proud of you!


Social climber
1187 Hunterwasser
May 18, 2013 - 06:20pm PT
Mom's goodbye date is challenging for me, after several years. I am a lot closer to my dad now and I wonder what it will be like when he goes. I'm glad you share what you're going through as it helps me to know other people are in the same boat. Take care!
Off White

Tenino, WA
May 18, 2013 - 06:34pm PT
Thanks for sharing those stories, I guess we know where you got some of your character, eh? Here's to a life lived well, a reminder of what we all should strive for.

Topic Author's Reply - May 18, 2013 - 06:43pm PT
Thanks Michelle,

It's a weird day, Aris is sick too so it's been a little rough. I don't know the answers about death. All I know is time just keeps going, the trash gets picked up, the bills pile up, and even when there is a great loss... Everyone keeps moving... Sometimes I want to yell out, make people notice each other, take a second to value their own time, their own lives since it's passing so fast. I want to yell at them, make them not waste it. Tell folks who you love that you LOVE THEM. Now is the time to experience your big dream, tomorrow might not be there. What annoys some folks, angers them, makes them feel righteous... Does it really matter? Really? On their death bed, will they really be caring about it? Most of it is so stupid. A big waste of time. Instead do what makes you feel good, what makes you feel free. Instead go love and be loved, enjoy this life.

It is what one really should be focusing on.

Trad climber
The great state of advaita
May 18, 2013 - 08:19pm PT
There is great power in the way you conduct yourself, in your words, in your insights. No doubt that your parents played a great role in that. And you have shown us a small glimpse into how that came about. Their gifts to you are vast... not just to you, not just to your family, but to all of us. I believe we can affect people we barely know in profound ways, sometimes, we don't even know that we've done it. Such is the case your wonderful family makes.

Peace and love to you today. Yes, kids still have their needs and wants calling to us. Know that well. In spite of it all, life carries on. That you can reflect will eventually, if not already, be picked up by them as well. And the wheel continues to spin.


Trad climber
Millbrae, CA
May 19, 2013 - 12:18pm PT
It's a very different world without one's parents.

May 18th was my Dad's birthday. He's been gone since 2004. Mom's been gone for 25 years. But on certain days, it still feels like yesterday. Yesterday that they held you, laughed with you, yelled at you, loved you, made you crazy, filled your heart and made you feel safe. Yesterday that they passed from here, in this moment - tangible, audible - to there.

If you had good parents (not everyone has, and I'm sorry for that), what you remember the most was the feeling of being loved, and of being taken care of, of being held in that way that a parent holds a child.

Best wishes, Phyl


Social climber
May 19, 2013 - 01:25pm PT
What a bad ass!! He rubbed off quite a bit o' that on you :) stop by nomad idyllwild some time and pick up your hug.

Topic Author's Reply - May 20, 2013 - 12:53am PT
Thanks folks,

I simply miss them tons.
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