Disturbing events you've been witness to?

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Jaybro

Social climber
Wolf City, Wyoming
Topic Author's Reply - Jun 29, 2013 - 12:55am PT
Ooh ooh, Kath, give us a clue!
The FBI eh? Hear that?You know who, that is reading this as I type?


This guy is not a threat to me just a pain in the ass narcissist. And possibly the worlds most famous hangdog. In real life he is an abject coward, won't look me in the eye, stares at the ground, is silent, almost catatonic. A real paper tiger behind a keyboard though. Unfortunately he is a danger and has been violent to someone else. Whom he ran off this forum, I might add! No need to out him if he stops harassing her.

Yes goat, the same one! And yeah I do know how to get him to stop hassling me. The problem is then he REALLY goes after her in all media! So front time to time I draw his fire to give her a break
Jaybro

Social climber
Wolf City, Wyoming
Topic Author's Reply - Jun 29, 2013 - 12:56am PT
Larry, is that from the place you sent me to get a pedicure?
The Larry

climber
Moab, UT
Jun 29, 2013 - 02:07am PT
You should screensave his text and post 'em up.

No Jay. No happy endings at lee nails. Except for the foot massage.
Jaybro

Social climber
Wolf City, Wyoming
Topic Author's Reply - Jul 2, 2013 - 11:48pm PT
You may be on to something about the Outing, Larry.
Jaybro

Social climber
Wolf City, Wyoming
Topic Author's Reply - Jul 7, 2013 - 08:30pm PT
Here is a disturbing thing I have recently witnessed.

Now, for a long time there have been stories in various media concerning violent, often sexually charged crimes such as rape and abuse of various sorts, and about often the word of the perpetrator gets taken and given more credence than that of the person violated. This seems so abhorrent and unnatural that I don't think most people want to believe it happens as often as it does. I know I didn't, especially not until it was driven home to me by a friend's experience in the last few days.

Enough is too much, and my friend confided in some climbing partners about a pattern of abuse and violence that has been going on for several years now. The perp in this case is seen to many, as a smooth charmer. Interestingly enough I never saw this charm in the first place, and he, sensing this it seems, almost immediately turned it off in my case and has instead treated me with disdain, slander an the whole panoply of passive aggressive tricks. Whatever, I really don't care what he thinks of me or my climbing.
But with my friend he affects a fake Eddie Haskell like persona for other witnesses. He is ingratiating, friendly, supportive. Then when when they are gone he reverts to his true sadistic malicious self, making demands, of all sorts, but mostly financial, and sexual.

The abusee in this case has kept this mostly quiet, ( though there have been a small number of people 'in the know' for several years) not wanting to " cause a scene". Now, confiding in seemingly trusted friends, her word is doubted. "He can't be as bad as you say, he's so charming."
" If it was really that bad, why didn't you say something sooner?"

It's like the classic examples of rape and abuse victims being told they "were asking for it!"
On another note, it's time for this guy to move on! He's dried this this cash and fame source dry, time for a new victim.

What can be done in this and similar situations? How did any of you successfully deal with any thing remotely like this?
goatboy smellz

climber
Nederland-GulfBreeze
Jul 7, 2013 - 09:30pm PT
Call him out, cause a scene, raise hell then rain fire and brimstone down on his ass.
Any guy picking on a girl deserves to be beaten and buried alive.
Kalimon

Social climber
Ridgway, CO
Jul 7, 2013 - 09:39pm PT
Jaybro,

Really sorry to hear that a good dude like yourself has been victimized by such a dangerous and pathetic sociopath. What a messed up situation. It seems that exposing such an individual would be the way to go, but who knows of the repercussions.

Good luck.
Matt Sarad

climber
Jul 8, 2013 - 12:08am PT
Three months ago I woke up on the pavement to the sound of an EMT calling my name. I made odd noises and saw my blood on the asphalt. 48 hours later I came to with my girlfriend and son at the foot of my bed in ICU.

I couldn't remember their names.

Seems I took a ride down a steep hill and hit a bump. 25 feet later I landed and went head first, breaking nine bones and five vertebra.
Ron Anderson

Trad climber
Soon to be Nipple suckling Liberal
Jul 8, 2013 - 12:26am PT
Jaybro invite the dood up here for some desert climbing,, which just happens to be quite near a rather deep mine shaft. Ill chip in for a bag of lime.. Or just get a group of hard hittin pipe swingers and go have a chat wit em..Or set up hidden cameras and put his arse on YOUTUBE.
Beautiful_Corn

Big Wall climber
Brooklyn Park, MD
Jul 8, 2013 - 07:19am PT
My partner and I were walking the base of the Trapps at the Gunks after leaving Northern Pillar. He walked around the corner from me looking for another route. A few moments later I heard the sound of tumbling rock then the sound of gear clanking. When I ran around the corner he had tumbled thirty feet down the talus slope, landing in a reclining position with blood all over him. His helmet, which he had been wearing, was still at the cliff base.

When I got to him he was unconscious and did not appear to be breathing. Moments after I arrived he was breathing on his own but choking on blood. He soon coughed up the blood and then started screaming, which at that point was a welcome change compared to how I found him. I called 911 and got someone to run the Carriage Road to get the ranger at the Uberfall. Lots of people turned up within minutes to help treat him and carry him to the pickup down on the road. When the rangers were distributing latex gloves to the other climbers that had arrived to help they didn't offer them to me since my hands were already covered in blood.

He got a helicopter ride to the trauma center, spent a week in intensive care, had a few surgeries, and had to sleep in a hospital-style bed when he finally got home. He had broken his jaw in a couple of places and broken every rib on his left side. His helmet that had been knocked off his head had a big impact mark on the back from the rock that fell on him. I have no doubt he would be dead if he hadn't left his helmet on while hiking.

He was climbing at the gym again within a few months and finally got on some rock a couple of weeks ago with me on a trip the the Adirondacks.
Beautiful_Corn

Big Wall climber
Brooklyn Park, MD
Jul 8, 2013 - 07:24am PT
In Autumn of 2001 I was taking a solo weekend backpacking trip on the Appalachian Trail in Maryland and I found a dead body. It wasn't a grim scene but the shock of it caused me to vomit against a tree. Later, after I helped the SAR crew carry out the body I found out he had died earlier that morning on the trail because I talked to a woman who had chatted with him at the trail-head before he set off.

Whenever I tell friends this story the number one question they ask is always: "Did you poke him with a stick?"
Bruce Kay

Gym climber
BC
Jul 8, 2013 - 10:14am PT
What can be done in this and similar situations? How did any of you successfully deal with any thing remotely like this?

Sticky situation Jaybro! The guy sounds like a sociopath. I think such a situation cannot be allowed to continue but it has to be handled well....

Maybe the best is to formally confront the bastar.... er, I mean the accused. If all are "friends" here then such a thing should be possible, if difficult. Perhaps designate a mediator. Try to convince the "victim" to be included so that they can assert themselves.

One clear benefit of this is that the accusations are revealed as a known situation to more than just the perpetrator and victim. If the c...suker tries anything in retribution he will know his days are numbered. If he is wrongfully accused or otherwise missunderstood this is his chance to redeem himself. A master sociopathic manipulator may use that to his advantage but that is the chance you need to take, but you can also prepare for it as well.

2x4s and baseball bats are probably not a good idea just yet.

Good luck!
rottingjohnny

Sport climber
mammoth lakes ca
Jul 8, 2013 - 10:31am PT
Great description Jaybro...Eddy Haskell...I know a chump just like that...Fast talking , charming , and willing to sacrifice anyone at any cost to maintain the Haskellesque charade...Good luck man...
Jaybro

Social climber
Wolf City, Wyoming
Topic Author's Reply - Jul 13, 2013 - 01:02pm PT
I'm just collateral damage Kali, the main stalkee of his obsession is someone else close to me. Sociopath for sure, I've also heard the term malignant narcissicist used in his description, and as applies to his M.O.

This is the same guy who once offered me money to climb a new route with the stalkee, so that he could later hold it against her which he has, relentlessly, for two years!!. I didn't take his money and would and do climb with her happily, all the time!

In a work of spite he left this route, the hardest offwidth in indian creek, out, of the new guidebook he was a consultant on.

Anyone ever deal with someone like this?
rottingjohnny

Sport climber
mammoth lakes ca
Jul 13, 2013 - 01:42pm PT
Jaybro...Take the guy climbing some day...Have him lead something dicey and remote then give him extra tension at the crux...Karma helps those who help themselves...RJ
goatboy smellz

climber
Nederland-GulfBreeze
Jul 13, 2013 - 05:17pm PT
Wow Jay those Montana boys are such drama queens.
Too bad they define their self worth by what they climb and not how they act in the real world.

Brandon-

climber
The Granite State.
Jul 13, 2013 - 05:44pm PT
Jaybro, I'm a pacifist, with exceptions.

I'd confront the guy. Start off nice and see how his body language changes.

Public shaming can work too.
nevahpopsoff

Boulder climber
the woods
Jul 13, 2013 - 05:47pm PT
my father, deep in Parkinson's, trying to walk today.
Anastasia

climber
Home
Jul 13, 2013 - 08:07pm PT
Matt Sarad,

So sorry for that fall. Must of been something out of this world. Hopefully you are fully recovering.

nevahpopsoff,

I have seen that. Hurts, hurts so bad it's hard to breath seeing someone you love suffering. I watched both my parents die and it wasn't pretty, but that's life. Hard, so breathlessly beautiful and somehow ugly too. My heart goes out to you.

Jaybro...

No idea man. I have had two evil charmers before in my life. Actually dated two guys that can make people think greatly of them but... Yeah, they are not who they appear to be. Once I got out of those relationships, I RAN... It still a twisted mess back there but at least it isn't my mess. Now I also dated a few Assholes too and that's a whole other subject. I actually have a bit of respect for the as#@&%es of this world because... They are who they are. They didn't change for me or anyone. If someone like myself stuck to them for a bit, that's more of my issue than theirs.
splitter

Trad climber
SoCal Hodad, surfing the galactic plane
Jul 13, 2013 - 08:46pm PT
Lockers new girlfriend (see Blitzos thread). I think he has bit off more than he can chew. lol
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