A flight attendant sees a suspicious looking couple on board, so she reports it to the Captain immediately
"Sir, I think we have a case of human trafficking! There is a very pretty, hot and sexy, female passenger on board, who looks quite frightened and the man she is with is a fat old slob who looks like a lecher, very sullen, mean and dangerous!"
The captain responds, "Patricia, I've told you this before. This is Air Force One..."
A teacher ask a little boy to use the word fascinate in a sentence.
The little boy thinks about it, and then says "my aunt has a shirt with ten buttons on it, but her boobs are so big she can only fascinate"
Did I tell you about the time Frank Sinatra saved my life?
There were these two big guys beating the crap out of me in Las Vegas, and all of a sudden Frank came around the corner and said, "That's enough, boys."