Depresion - Not Something one can beat with will power alone


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Trad climber
Jun 13, 2011 - 11:33pm PT
Keep on keeping on John Moosie.

Papillon, a similar thing happened with a girl in my daughter's class this year. Fight with boyfriend led to hanging herself in boyfriend's house. Two years ago a girl hanged herself near my classroom at lunch. She's alive, but a vegetable. A science teacher and custodian were able to cut her down in time to save her life. Kids were texting and Facebooking mean things about her before the incident.

Trad climber
So Cal urban sprawl Hell
Jun 14, 2011 - 12:25am PT
what I'd like to know If a person is put on an SSRI and they go totally manic are they bipolar?
John Moosie

Beautiful California
Jun 14, 2011 - 12:55am PT
what I'd like to know If a person is put on an SSRI and they go totally manic are they bipolar?

WARNING.. what you are about to read is opinion. I am not a doctor. ( I know you know that, but some people freak out.. eek!!! )

There are studies that say SSRIs can cause mania.. Here is a page with a bunch of studies. I don't know how legit they are.

Scroll down a ways and look at the headings.

Here is just one of them..

By the way.. which SSRI? I have had SSRI induced mania.


Maybe one of the docs will chime in.

Social climber
Jun 14, 2011 - 12:59am PT
A long time ago I was prescribed Zoloft and left unsupervised and in retrospect I believe I was manic for a few months. I have never been diagnosed as bipolar just depressed. Recently I decided to stop taking psych meds altogether, replacing them with daily qigong practise, I've never felt better (touch wood).

Trad climber
The Illuminati -- S.P.E.C.T.R.E. Division
Nov 15, 2012 - 11:59pm PT
I forget what I was searching for, but I came across this.

Trad climber
The Illuminati -- S.P.E.C.T.R.E. Division
Nov 16, 2012 - 12:05am PT
On April 1, 2010, Jeff Batten posted:

For the last month I have been trying to beat my depression with will power alone. This is not working, I cannot sleep, I grow more fatigued each day and start thinking dark thoughs.

I have family mememeber telling me to just snap out of it. I wish it was that easy.

Its like getting up a climb without the necessary strenght to do the moves.

I had to call in sick to work as I sleept 1 hour.

Whats the next step I need to take. New Doctor. Hospital.

I am starting to give up hope.

A little compassion and suggestions would be very nice.


On May 25, 2010 he was gone.

Public records show that our friend Jeff Batten has left us, on May 25th, 2010

He posted as Juan de fuca, prowsolo, the general, rockstar, lostarrow and other alias.

And he was the original internet troll on the subject of climbing, dating far back into the usenet board Rec.climbing, before the web had such communications.

For a long time, Jeff's posts were merely trolls, sometime appreciated, sometimes resented. But as time went on, Jeff opening up and shared more and more of himself with the online community. His scientific interests, his struggles with physical pain and depression, and his explorations into spirituality. He was our taco seismograph.

I choose to believe that Jeff is relieved from his struggles now, after facing them and exploring many ways of inner peace. I offer condolences for those who knew and will miss him. We will.

Perhaps we can post some of his classic trolls, cartoons featuring Jeff by Ouch (another fallen brother) and some of his other sharings.

Fly high Jeff, on your greatest adventure since soloing the Prow.



Trad climber
Nov 16, 2012 - 04:10am PT
My climbing partner killed himself. He was clinically depressed and would not take prescribed meds. He was 45.

Trad climber
Nov 16, 2012 - 01:56pm PT
I have suffered a few periods in my life where I could not sleep for months on end. It just hammers a person and makes living day to day very difficult.
I was lucky enough to know the real cause of this state. It was always work related, working too hard, working in the wrong situation, work stress etc.
I am fortunate that I was able to go to part time work(60%) in blocks so I have 12 days off at a time. The time off means I can spend lots of time in the outdoors, do a lot more climbing, and take some good holidays. This has the effect of cleaning my brain so I am enthusiastic and very productive when I get back to work. My productivity per hour has increased so my employers are actually getting a good deal.
People are reluctant to talk about their problems because we don't want to be seen as weak.
If you can identify the underlying cause of the issues then there is the possibility of fixing things.

Trad climber
Nor Cal
Nov 16, 2012 - 02:14pm PT
I suffered what felt like a bout of depression in the 90's when 'we' invaded Kuait. Listening to NPR describe bombs falling while my children ran naked thru the poppies in the meadow. This lasted several months and resulted in alienating myself from my family and friends. I found relief one day in about ten min. when I came across the mental health chapter in 'The Better Homes and gardens guide to family health'. I know that my problem is not the same as anyone else necessarily. but to gain that insight saved me from who knows what. Oh yeah. then I found climbing!

Trad climber
Yosemite, ca
Nov 16, 2012 - 03:42pm PT
So what was your insight Cove?

climber a single wide......
Aug 12, 2014 - 10:24am PT
On the wings of Robin Williams- and in memory of the OP Juan de Prow Solo- I thought I'd bump this thread.

My experience w the Big D was late '10. Heavy multiple family & marriage stuff, serious biz challenges, then I got real sick (whooping cough) conspired to send me south. I was not exercising, got hooked on Ambien (which frucked up my sleep cycle). Psyc meds probably made things worse, tho Wellbutrin helped pull me out.

Friends made a big positive difference. Dave Bruckman was always trying to get me out mtn biking. Tony Yeary was in my corner. Pat Nay’s door was always open. Ditto Tarbuster Roy’s telephone. I recall at the ’11 Flanders Fest, Dean Cragman was super encouraging trying to get me to attend in spite of the fact I could barely climb out of bed.

3 years later, I could not have imagined life being as good as it is. The below photo is NOT a depressed man, no….

Credit: Sewellymon

Somewhere out there
Aug 12, 2014 - 10:32am PT
Look, the fact that you've been through what you've been through personally should be the evidence I point to.
The fact that you are here to write this should be enough to stick with it. A new idea is just around the corner, a new way of thinking about this happens.
If you notice yourself starting to cycle your thoughts, shut it off with a hum (secret - you are in control of your head more than you think).

Keep it up

Trad climber
dancin on the tip of god's middle finger
Aug 12, 2014 - 10:42am PT
thanks for the bump and the success story, swelly.

my trip is cyclical.
one week i'm conquering my world, and then some,
and the next week i recede into a self-imposed beating.

i recognize it,
and have dabbled with ill-coping mechanisms.

for now, i just ride it out,
and await the return of the my hyper-glow.

the highs and my accomplishments during such
are what emotionally drag me thru the down times.

i forsee a time when
i am less able in the body,
and thus will become more
prone to extended lows,
as i will lack the verve
to re-ignite my dim torch.

we'll see, huh.
when the light shines.
and we'll see
when it doesn't.

i haven't a self-concern, nor a selfish care in the world.
i am very much extended in
building up and protecting my two lovely daughters.


Aug 12, 2014 - 10:49am PT
Some non-doc advice:

Get advice from your doctor. The internet is fine, but you get what you pay for here.

Be very wary of advice from those who do not experience your condition. Their advice tends towards the exercise/diet/sleep - everything will be OK line. Good advice for anyone, of course, but that often isn't enough.

Examining one's life philosophy (Choice Theory and Rational Emotive Therapy is a good start) can also help short circuit those downward spiraling thoughts.

If you're a diabetic, you take insulin. Nobody says boo. If you suffer from depression and you take meds, some folks still think that's not the proper course of action.

Ignore them. Do what works for you.

And track your moods daily. Jot down some data to track what does and doesn't work.

Here's one not a lot of folks think about: suicides often happen not when a person is most deeply depressed (when there isn't enough motivation to act - but when they are climbing out of a period of depression, and 'seem to be getting better', and so have the motivation to act.

Life may serve you a sh#t sandwich, and you may have to eat some of it, but you can also change restaurants.


Trad climber
dancin on the tip of god's middle finger
Aug 12, 2014 - 10:58am PT
i concur,
and i am methodically
instigating a vast change
in my domain:

i am selling the home that i built
and our mountain cabin;

and then reinvesting the equity
in a humble shack
with no land
and thus i'll be responsible
for 300 dollars a month shelter expense.

the old mid-life is creeping in (i'm 40)
and i am dodging crisis
by increasing my situational elasticity.

Aug 12, 2014 - 11:02am PT
And furthermore, f*#k all these tough-love shitlords throwing around words like "cowardly" and "selfish".

If you don't have depression, you need to shut the f*#k up about suicide. Have some empathy and thank your dear lord in heaven that you don't have it because it f*#king sucks.


Trad climber
The state of confusion
Aug 12, 2014 - 11:04am PT

Mental health issues are a huge problem in the US. . .
and still looked on as 'weakness'. . .
Unfortunately they're a real disease. . .

climber a single wide......
Aug 12, 2014 - 11:07am PT
Weeg- you still sober? That sure helps. My wife stopped drinking a year ago, and over the last 3- 4 months I am down to just dribs and drabs. I like that at 10:30 at night I can practice guitar and not be all muddy headed....


Aug 12, 2014 - 11:13am PT
Yeah, the drinking has to go. 100%. So much easier and less stressful than trying to 'manage it'.

Mos def step one. Gotta get to a baseline to track the positive results of any experimentation.

I know several friends who just have a glass of wine a night or every other night but let even that low level of consumption go. They report feeling incredibly better and more vibrant - more energy in the evening - brighter i in the morning.

They're always surprised at the negative effects of even a wee bit o' the sauce.

Oh, and it goes without saying - lose the guns and pills. The stats are grim there.


Trad climber
dancin on the tip of god's middle finger
Aug 12, 2014 - 11:17am PT
no. i hold on to my off-track love affair with beer.

but i only enjoy liaisons maybe twice a month;
the criteria being that
i have more than one day to myself.

i.e. the girls go out of town with mom,
or i'm allotted a daddy holiday in strawberry.

but basically i never drink around
anyone that i love.

i get along just fine with my inner dirtbag.
it's those around me whom love me that clash
with my filthy heart.
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