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Matt J.
climber
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Topic Author's Original Post - Dec 29, 2009 - 12:53pm PT
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I'm seeking adventure stories for a book of "Yosemite Epics." Nail-biting stories from rock, snow, ice and whitewater are welcome, especially if they end well (no rescues or serious injuries) and have not been published elsewhere. Thanks if you can help.
Matt Johanson
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WBraun
climber
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Dec 29, 2009 - 01:22pm PT
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Brad Jarrett's epic winter ascent on Half Dome is a good one?
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Ed Hartouni
Trad climber
Livermore, CA
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Dec 29, 2009 - 01:35pm PT
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maybe dig in a little to the trip reports mixed deep in the STForum, and maybe in the new TR section (less possible) for many TRs possibly expandable to short stories...
...there are some diamonds-in-the-rough that can be mined out of this particular ground.
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WBraun
climber
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Dec 29, 2009 - 01:46pm PT
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Three more .... there's tons.
Ammon McNeely soloing on El Cap and rips big ass pitch, falls, knocks himself unconscious, weird sh'it coming out of his head/ear?, declines rescue, and finishes the route.
Kevin Fosberg solos Mescalito, and takes big ass fall, knocks the sh#t out of himself, he's ready to call for rescue cause he's seeing stars instead of rock, sleeps it off for a day instead and finishes.
Corbett and Errett on El Cap almost die of hypothermia high on El Cap. They throw their clothe off and get naked together to survive. They finish the climb.
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maldaly
Trad climber
Boulder, CO
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Dec 29, 2009 - 09:09pm PT
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And then there was the time I rappelled off the ends of my ropes, 300' above the ground on the Apron, at night. Epic didn't last too long but it sure had my undivided attention for a few seconds.
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pip the dog
Mountain climber
planet dogboy
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Dec 29, 2009 - 09:41pm PT
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>Got a Yosemite epic?
nope. not me and my pals. our every trip to the valley went absolutely swimmingly. the sun shined every day. we always got a site in C4 without so much as standing in line. every route we did challenged us - but never so much as to require a diaper change or a bail out. we never once got off route. never once found a loose flake the size of a Buick. our rack decisions were always precisely on target. we always found plenty of solid pro precisely when we needed it; and we always found all the bolts, even in tuolumne.
we never once got caught in traffic on the nose. the partners we hooked up with via the board who claimed they were "solid on any .12" proved to be just that. we always found the descent route right away and as such always got back to camp by sunset. and of course we always had enough cash for hearty and healthy meals; then just one beer, a quality european beer, cold and in a bottle. then asleep by 9:30pm for a crisp start at sunrise. our C4 neighbors were always polite, they didn't so much as step on a twig after 9pm. and of course the rangers always smiled and saluted us - often they brought us pastries.
so, no, i never once had an epic in the valley. sorry i couldn't be of more assistance on this topic.
canis fidelis est, well kinda...
^,,^
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Ed Hartouni
Trad climber
Livermore, CA
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Dec 29, 2009 - 10:04pm PT
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pip didn't mention any of the "4th class" approaches.... telling...
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'Pass the Pitons' Pete
Big Wall climber
like Ontario, Canada, eh?
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Dec 29, 2009 - 10:18pm PT
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I once had to fight a bear to get my donuts back. That was pretty epic.
Another time I got lost in manzanita. Man, that stuff is really sharp! And dusty, too - holy.
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Captain...or Skully
Social climber
Top of the 5.2-5.12 Boulder
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Dec 29, 2009 - 10:18pm PT
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Hi Pip(the Dog)!
Where's the line between epic & plain old adventure, anyway?
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Spider Savage
Mountain climber
SoCal
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Dec 29, 2009 - 11:05pm PT
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Dude, Just interview Werner and call it that. Your one stop source of hairy valley stories. Blood and violence is what the masses want. Pulp fiction such as Jeff Long's "Angels of Light."
My boring story: Rapped off El Cap ledges at midnight on a moonless night. Five of us with only two headlamps between us. On a rope that was fashioned of human hair, from my back. No one survived that fateful night. Bodies scattered in the talus. We all died a slow and painful death. Coyotes removed all trace.
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Captain...or Skully
Social climber
Top of the 5.2-5.12 Boulder
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Dec 30, 2009 - 12:23am PT
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Savage story.....oh, I guess it would be, huh?
My bad.
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Chaz
Trad climber
greater Boss Angeles area
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Dec 30, 2009 - 01:07am PT
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Did one of the Five Open Books a pitch or two ahead of a French party, and Jesus did those guys reek! The stench wafted straight up the dihedrial just like a chimney. We could smell them a hundred yards away!
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Fogarty
climber
BITD
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Dec 30, 2009 - 01:10am PT
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Psycho Kenny, the Zodiac, and his hammer in my back!
(Sorry can’t tell all)
Judge Pitts had us all sign a Seas, and assist?
WBraun, Do you have John Dills report on this maybe you could post it?
June July August 1985?
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Reilly
Mountain climber
Monrovia, CA
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Dec 30, 2009 - 01:22am PT
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I would say the YPB approach qualifies as an epic.
After that horror show I retired to my devil's club and
Sasquatch riddled lair in the Great Northwest for R&R.
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Mighty Hiker
climber
Vancouver, B.C.
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Dec 30, 2009 - 02:01am PT
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It was a dark and stormy night. Suddenly a shriek rang out. Followed by conga dancing. It was another normal night at Camp 4.
Then it got hot, really hot. So hot you could fry a Werner on the sidewalk. (Yes, this epic involves sidewalks.) So hot, we were entirely crazed, instead of half-crazed as usual, and went to pick up other people's garbage. Later I spent the day in court. I was totally sketched. It was at least M22, A6++, 5.13c on disintegrating knobs. But hey, I recited my hero's mantra - "I'm Mark Hudon, and I'm badass" - and it didn't seem so bad after all.
Later I was attacked by a bear, and a rabid skwirrrl. It looked a little like LEB. A demure Tuolumne Penguin looked on.
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Jack Burns
climber
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Dec 30, 2009 - 02:11am PT
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This one time, Mr. Way yelled at me in the cafeteria for saying that I did the Rostrum.
"Dude. You did not do the Rostrum. You did the first part of the Rostrum with a 5.9 last pitch variation. Huuuuuge difference, dude. You can't claim you've done the Rostrum when you actually did not do the Rostrum."
At this point he launched into an inspired diatribe about how being "Curry-based" is way ghetto and not cool at all. Then he said "psh" really loud and left. That's about what happened anyway. The caf can be pretty epic.
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Reeotch
Trad climber
Kayenta, AZ
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Dec 30, 2009 - 11:42am PT
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Matt,
This one did not end well, but it could have been a lot worse!
From the ledge on top of the Hollow Flake, I was bringing up the rear. My two partners were at the next belay (about 100' up and 30 - 40' to the right). As they began hauling I lowered out the bags hand over hand on a tag line (actually an old dynamic lead line, luckily). As the bags went around the corner they rolled accross the face because of the low angle.
As they hauled the bags were getting stuck on little roofs, so I was yarding from below, helping the bags clear the obstacles. Then I noticed my tag line was going slack. "Are you guys lowering the bags?" As soon as I said that I looked down at my hands only to see smoke pouring out from between my fingers. I immediately realized that the haul bags were in free-fall! Sh!t! I dropped the tag line and hit the deck in the bottom of the bathtub ledge because I also remembered I was not clipped in at the time.
The tag line had been stacked at the bottom of the ledge and was not clipped to anything either. Sudenly, everything stopped and I felt a tug on my harness. First, I looked at my hands which were dripping blood all over the place. At least 8 of my 10 fingers had been burned through the skin by the rope. Then, I noticed, as I started to untangle myself that the tag line had tangled around one of the aiders I had clipped to my harness, and that was the only thing holding the bags up. At that point I froze while Doug (Nature) rapped down and promptly threw a jug onto the tag line.
There was only about 10' - 15' of tag line left! If the bags had gone all the way, they would have cratered somewhere in the vicinity of Sacherer Cracker.
My hands were too fuked up to continue, so we spent the rest of the day drinking beer on top of the Hollow Flake, and counting my lucky stars. We bailed the next day.
Now, I always TIE the haul line in to the haul bags, NEVER JUST CLIP THEM IN!
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WBraun
climber
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Dec 30, 2009 - 12:02pm PT
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Kauk, Steve Sutton and Dave Bircheff first real winter ascent of North American Wall.
They bivy in tube tents. They climb in storms. Kauk wears blue genes with no long johns.
Their last day in igloo 3 feet of snow falls. kauk has to drill rivets because the crack is so frozen and the pins don't go in. Bircheff gets frostbit belaying. All hell to top.
Dale Bard and Bircheff on Excaliber. 100 plus temps and they run out water for two days. Dale leads and hauls including having to haul Bircheff as he's toast.
Dale on last day thinks he's going to die because he's so dehydrated he sees the first symptoms of death due to dehydration by poking into his skin and the depression made is staying there.
They claw their way to the top and live ......
Me and Kauk on Tissiack huge ass storm on last day. We climb in Niagara falls. Grit gets into my eyes and can't see, we're hypothermic, take huge fall upside down when expando flake breaks off. We don't clean last pitch because we think we might die.
At the summit overhang it's the merced river pouring on top of us. Kauk leads off with no pro looking to fall the entire pitch with 1 inch water running over the top of his boots.
We make it to the top and run for our lives down the cables in dark.
Tom Frost was at the saddle with huge fire, we're saved. C'mon over boys says Tom and get warm.
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Wayno
Big Wall climber
Seattle, WA
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Dec 30, 2009 - 01:58pm PT
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Winter storm on the Trip. Big winter storm. One partner with destroyed portaledge spends several nights in 3 butt-bags during storm. Rescue called by someone on the ground but we go for it anyway and top out.
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